


Tyranny's Disease

by cgner



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Historical, F/M, Jily Pirate Fest, Pirates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-27
Updated: 2014-04-24
Packaged: 2018-07-21 20:30:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 100,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7402798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cgner/pseuds/cgner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lily intended to spend one night on James's pirate ship and leave with her purse a bit heavier. Now she's stuck on board, which might be less annoying if she could figure out where they were bloody going, if half the crew didn't suspect her of sabotage, and if she weren't falling for the captain. And why on earth is his cat wearing an eye patch?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Another Alley

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you, Stefanie and Karaline, for being my fabulous betas/friends! Your work is so, so appreciated. Thank you for telling me I wasn’t crazy to take this story where I did, and for noticing whether Lily uses a bookmark. Thank you, Andrea, for translating the Latin quote for Part II.
> 
> This story is dedicated to the Novel Writer Club (Adriana, Allison, Ayesha, Karaline, Katie, Laura, Natalia, and Todd). Aw, man, you guys were with me on this from the start. Thank you so much for your feedback and support during all of my angsting! This one’s for you. :)

** Part I **

“For somehow this is tyranny’s disease, to trust no friends.”  
—Aeschylus

**\--**

Lily peered out around the corner, back flat against the alley wall. Target spotted, she darted back to Sam, who stood a little further into the alley, outside the range of the dim streetlights. “He’s coming,” she whispered. “Come on.”

Sam grinned. “I’m gonna miss you.”

“Shut up and snog me already.” Lily flashed him a seductive smile. “Or have you forgotten how?”

Sam’s handsome face flipped from amused to enraged, and he shoved Lily up against the wooden building behind her. “Think you can say no to me?” he snarled.

“Stop it!” Lily cried, forcing a few tears into her eyes, just enough to show but not enough to fall.

Sam’s rough hand ripped her dress off her shoulder, the thin fabric tearing easily. She pounded her fists against his chest while he swooped in and began laving messy kisses along her neck.

“Sounds to me like you need to work on your seduction skills.”

Lily saw him from the corner of her eye, a skinny, dark-haired bloke standing in the entrance to the narrow alley.

James Potter.

Or at least, it certainly looked an awful lot like the picture Lily had seen. He wasn’t as tall as Sam. He didn’t have half of Sam’s muscle. He didn’t even have an obvious weapon on him, probably to maintain a low profile. And yet there he stood, leaning one shoulder against the wall of the same building Lily was pressed against and looking terribly matter of fact about things.

Sam flipped him a rude gesture. “Sod off.”

“I really have to insist that you leave this woman alone, actually,” James said. “Immediately, if you please.”

Sam kept Lily pinned with one hand and shot an annoyed look at James. “What are you going to do if I don’t, eh?”

“There was an officer just around the block. I’d be happy to fetch him and leave you to his tender mercies.”

Sam looked back and forth between Lily and James before finally shoving her aside.

“Don’t think I won’t find you,” Sam sneered. “Now get out of here before I change my mind.”

She let her shoulders fold in a little. “Sam, please, be reasonable—”

“I said _go_!”

James offered his arm out to Lily. “It’s a lovely evening and I could use some company for a walk. Care to join me, miss?”

Lily threw one last panicked glance at Sam and made a dash for James, pulling her dress up over her bust where it’d been ripped. James eyed her state of partial undress with distaste. He removed his cloak, swung it around Lily, and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, drawing her in close.

She kept quiet until they’d passed a few homes and shops. Except for a few passersby in the distance, and the occasional flicker of a candle in a window, they walked alone in the small town.

“Thank you,” Lily said, with as much depth as she could muster. “He can be very kind, but lately he’s been very….”

“Crass? Cruel? Unwilling to listen to no?”

“Essentially.”

James still had his arm around her, and it was nice, pretending he really was her hero. They strolled down the cobbled street together and soon reached the boardwalk overlooking the harbor, the candles in the streetlights reflecting back at them in the ocean.

Brest had a quaint charm that Lily had found and admired in many French ports, a calmness lacking in the larger cities, with the ever present tang of sea salt on the air. She’d met new friends here, and some easy marks. But her coinpurse had got too light, and Sam wasn’t so foolish as to ask her to stay, especially not when he would be moving on himself soon enough.

“I’m perfectly content to keep walking,” James said, “but is there a particular direction we should be heading?”

“Where are _you_ going?” she said, pretending to feign confidence.

“That’s rather immaterial, isn’t it?”

“I don’t think so.”

He looked at her with a vague air of concern. “I mean, you’re beautiful and all, but we’ve only just met.”

Lily guided them to the fence overlooking the piers, the sleek war ships rocking gently in the harbor tide. A seagull landed on the wooden railing near them and tucked its head under its wing.

“I’m not from here,” Lily said.

“I did rather guess by the accent.”

“And I don’t think I should stay here much longer. Not now, anyway, not after—well.”

“Who could blame you for leaving?”

Lily turned in toward him and looked up through her lashes. “You’ve already done so much for me.”

“It was nothing, really,” he said, his eyes going wide when she leaned in, her chest pressed against his.

“And I do want to repay you, only there is something more you could do for me….”

“Yes?” he said, a bit breathily.

Lily licked her lips, and he watched them, transfixed.

“Take me on your ship?” she asked.

He stumbled back, his arm dropping off her. “What?”

“You know the people on that ship, don’t you?”

She pointed down to the ship closest to the boardwalk. A man and a woman stood clinging to the rails of the deck, visible in the moonlight, waving and hollering at James. One of them whistled loudly, in an impressed sort of way.

“Oh. Er. Yes,” James said sheepishly, “I do know them.” He slashed his hand through the air at them and they shut up immediately.

“And it only makes sense,” Lily continued, a little excited, as though this were only just occurring to her, “that if you’re not sticking around, you also work on that ship.”

“You’ve got me there,” he said, sounding rather strange.

“Where are you going?”

“Not that I know why it’s relevant, but we’re headed for Bilbao.”

Lily nodded. “Could you—I mean, if it’s not too much trouble—only I’ve a friend in Saint-Nazaire, you see. If I leave Brest, I won’t have to worry about Sam, and then…. Saint-Nazaire is on the way to Bilbao, and it’s only a day’s journey from here.”

“Er.”

“I can pay you, a little, and I need—I need to get away from Sam.” Lily dropped her gaze. “You heard him. He won’t leave me alone.”

“I suppose not.” James still had that funny sort of lilt in his voice, like he couldn’t quite believe she was asking him this.

“I can help out on the ship, if you need,” she said, letting her voice slip into a plead. “Cooking or cleaning or whatever you need that I can do.”

“You want to come on board. With me. The man you just met.”

“I don’t know what else to do besides leave. Please, as a favor to your fellow countrywoman?”

He rubbed his hair with one hand.

Some pirates leapt at the chance to have a woman on board. James was requiring more persuasion than she’d expected, particularly given his earlier confidence.

“Er,” he said, “how much do you think is reasonable for passage to Saint-Nazaire?”

“Oh, I dunno. Forty livre?”

“That’s…fine. Yes, I’ll bring you on board for that.”

“Oh, thank you!” Lily pounced on him and engulfed him in a hug. He let out a faint _oof_ but hugged her back awkwardly. “You’re my savior. Thank you so, so much.”

“Think nothing of it,” he said, trying to regain his composure.

“When is the ship leaving?”

“Well, that’s the thing, actually. Er, we’re just about to pull anchor.”

“Oh. That soon.” Lily pursed her lips and pulled them to one side, pretending to deliberate this.

“I’m more than happy to walk you home if you’re not ready to leave this instant. I wouldn’t abandon you to the streets.”

“No, I—he knows where I live, you know. And I—if I have to, I can be ready soon. Yes. Right now, in fact.”

“Not that I’m reneging, but I have to ask – don’t you need to collect your belongings?”

She pulled his cloak tighter around her shoulders, her voice dropping a pitch. “Not that I have much, but most of my things are…well, at Sam’s. And I don’t….”

“Oh.”

“Yes, _oh_. And I’m—I’m leaving this life behind. If it means not having to see him…. I can easily live in this dress for a few days.”

“I suppose.”

“Then take me to your ship? I wouldn’t want you—well, us—to miss your departure.”

“All right, er….”

She smiled, this time genuinely. “Lily.”

“A pleasure to meet you, Lily. I’m James.”

“James.” She linked her arm through his. “It suits you. Very well, then. Take me to your ship, James.”

\--

James’s ship didn’t fly an obvious pirate flag – in fact, it flew no flag at all, which was what had first drawn Lily’s attention to it.

Then Lily had seen him. James Potter, a man wanted by the English government for piracy. She’d found a poster with his face on it barely three months ago in Brighton.                                                                                                                 

Not that Lily had any intention of turning him in. She hadn’t expected to run across a ship full of pirates in a French military port, but she was certainly willing to take advantage of the situation.

A tall, dark-skinned woman leaned over the deck rail and eyed Lily coolly as James led her up the gangway. Lily offered her a meek smile, but the woman’s gaze only hardened.

Although James’s ship boasted three masts and a sizeable sterncastle, the hulking naval ships of the marina towered over it. Young pirates often dreamed of enormous ships, large enough to hold a crew of hundreds, but Lily knew better, and apparently so did James.

Even after nearly three years, Lily couldn’t board a ship without thinking of her mother. Her mum had always gone on about the expansive sails, the sturdy masts, the webbed shrouds – according to her, every ship had its own unique, complex beauty. James’s was less elegant than others, but far from simple. Bright red letters along the side of the ship read _The Oddity_.

She frowned—ships tended to have more poetic names—but then hid it and watched James as they stepped off the gangway onto the main deck.

“Attention, everyone,” he shouted. “We’re taking on a temporary passenger. This is Lily and we’re dropping her off at Saint-Nazaire tomorrow night.”

Curiously, only a handful of pirates had gathered around them on the deck. By all rights, the deck should have been swarming with people adjusting the riggings and generally scurrying about.

“We’re not scheduled to stop in Saint-Nazaire,” said the woman who’d glared at Lily. She stood with her legs apart and her arms folded, a bright red scarf pulling her tightly-curled hair back from her face.

“Change of plans, Meadowes,” James said easily. “Won’t take very long, and Lily here needs a lift.”

Lily kept her eyes wide and hands clasped where they hung in front of her, assessing the layout of the ship. Everything seemed fairly standard, except for the lack of more pirates.

“I’m really not sure that that’s a good idea, James,” said a sandy-haired man. He’d started rolling down his sleeves from where he’d pushed them up around his elbows, but before he could finish, Lily caught sight of long, faded scars running along his forearms. “We’ve a schedule to keep.”

Obviously that was a lie—pirates had no schedules—but Lily kept her mouth in a small half-smile. She had the captain on her side, true. But this was a pirate ship, and she did need the support of the crew.

“Please. I offered to pay,” she said earnestly, “and help out on the ship however I can. Only James just saved me from a—well, an unpleasant gentleman, and I’m….” She let herself break off and look down at the deck.

“I’m concerned about her safety.” James slid an arm around her shoulders. “I can’t leave her here.”

Lily threw a grateful look up at him. “Please? I’d be so indebted to all of you.”

A broad-shouldered man with a strong jaw unfolded his arms. “I think we can spare one day,” he said, with a gentler voice than Lily expected from such a large person.

“Thank you,” Lily said.

A dark-eyed blonde grinned at her, dimples forming in her cheeks. She wore her hair in a complicated braid that wrapped around her head, and wore her practical trousers and shirt with more casual elegance than Lily could ever hope to duplicate.

“I hear Saint-Nazaire is lovely,” she said.

James nodded after each crew member weighed in, but he tensed almost imperceptibly when he looked to another dark-haired young man, one with a cleanly-lined face that Lily immediately pegged as noble.

The man shrugged, looking bored by the entire affair. “If James thinks it’s a good idea, let her stay.”

“That’s what I like to hear, Sirius.” James beamed. “Marlene, can you help Lily stitch up her dress? She had an unfortunate encounter with a very large rat earlier this evening.”

“Those rats didn’t become goats, did they?” the scarred man asked, eyes narrowing.

James looked confused. “Of course not.”

The man gave a thin smile, verging on sad. “Just checking.”

In the interest of drawing as little attention to herself as possible, Lily kept her questions to herself.

“Let’s set sail, then,” James said. “Remus, Sirius, we’ve got to chart a new course. My cabin, immediately?”

Sirius gave a lazy salute.

James leaned in close before removing his arm from Lily’s shoulder. “Marlene will take good care of you.”

“Thanks,” Lily said, her cheeks unexpectedly heating.

“Come on.” A hand tugged at Lily’s forearm, and Lily looked away from James to see the friendly blonde. “I’ll fix you up.”

James waved at Lily as she let herself get dragged to a ladder leading below deck.

“You’ve got stunning eyes,” Marlene said as she started climbing down.

“Er,” said Lily. “Thanks.”

She followed Marlene down and took a second to let her eyes readjust to the dim lighting. Like most ships, the crew slept on thin mats nestled between the cannons, a personal trunk tucked between each bed and the wall of the ship. A few candles flickered in iron holders along the walls.

Bafflingly, she and Marlene had entered an empty room. If the crew wasn’t on the main deck or the gun deck, there were very few places left for them to wait for departure.

Marlene crawled onto one of the beds and began rummaging through her trunk. “You’re not as curvy as I am, but I think we can make do. I can find something temporary while we fix up your dress.”

Lily removed James’s cloak and draped it over a polished cannon, holding up her ripped bodice with one hand.

Marlene turned around holding plain yellow dress and frowned. “You weren’t lying about that gentleman.”

“I always liked his strength,” Lily said, “until….”

“Men,” Marlene agreed.

Lily took the dress and smiled in thanks. “James seems all right, though. Er, do you mind?”

Marlene obliged her by turning her back, and Lily gratefully changed out of her broken dress and into Marlene’s. She carefully transferred her mokeskin pouch to the new bodice, trying the keep the coins inside from jangling against each other.

The dress sagged around her chest a little, but at least she wasn’t on the verge of exposing herself.

Marlene turned back around and raised her eyebrows. “Interested in the captain, are we?”

“He is fit,” Lily admitted, adjusting the way the dress draped across her shoulders.

“I’ll say.”

“I mean, his hair, for one thing.”

“Oh, _tell_ me about it. Makes me want to run my fingers through it, you know?”

“Well, I’ll only have tonight to seduce him, and all things considered, I’ll pass.”

“Nothing on you, but I don’t think he’d oblige you. He’s not the type.”

“Then I’ll have to keep myself warm, which is perfectly fine by me.” Lily made a show of looking around and counting the number of beds surrounding them. “It’s all right if you don’t have a bed for me, you know. I can sleep on the floor for one night.”

“Oh, we’ve plenty of spares. Don’t worry about that.”

Lily didn’t understand how they could have spares when they only had a few dozen beds, but she couldn’t ask without revealing her vast experience with pirate ships.

“That’s very generous of you,” she said. “And I do appreciate you fighting for James to take me on. I know everyone didn’t want to, and I don’t want to cause any trouble on board.”

“Oh, don’t mind Dorcas. She hates everyone, and Remus is just obsessed with punctuality.”

Lily smiled. “Well, they don’t have to worry. I’ll be out of your hair before you know it.”

She expected Marlene to go help the crew leave Brest, but instead Marlene dropped onto her bed, brushing what looked like a letter off to the side, and invited Lily to sit on the mat across from her. Marlene settled in and leaned forward, like they were children and Lily was spending the night at Marlene’s house.

Marlene was in the middle of a story about haggling over a coat in Brest when Lily felt the ship start moving. How they’d managed it with such a small crew so quickly, she had no idea, and she couldn’t think of a good excuse to go up onto the deck and watch them work.

“If you need to leave me to help everyone else,” Lily said, “I can manage on my own. I’ll just go to sleep.”

Marlene waved a hand. “Oh, they’re fine without me.”

“If you’re sure,” Lily said uncertainly.

Not long after the ship started its journey, more members of the crew started trickling down from the main deck.

Remus came first, climbing down the ladder with precise steps, and gave Lily a faint smile. “Evening,” he said, moving toward the bed next to Lily. “Marlene, James nicked himself and is bleeding all over. Would you mind patching it up? I remain unconvinced by his pleas that he’s fine.”

At least that explained why Marlene wasn’t expected to help out on deck. They were foolish to sail with such a small crew, but not so foolish as to sail without a surgeon.

“Idiot,” Marlene said fondly. She hopped to her feet and threw an apologetic look at Lily. “I’ll be right back.”

She clattered up the ladder, and Lily turned to Remus. He pulled a few neatly-folded shirts out of his trunk and set them precisely on his bed.

“It seems James showed up just in time to save you,” he said, not looking at Lily.

“He has impeccable timing.”

“I admit, it’s not something I’ve ever accused him of before.” Remus bent over to reach into the bottom of his trunk with one arm, nearly sticking his head in his trunk, and frowned.

Lily kept herself from straining her neck to see what he was looking at so intently. “Mathematically speaking, he must be in the right place at the right time at least occasionally.”

“True enough.” He leaned back to sit on his heels and placed his shirts back in his trunk, as deliberately as he’d removed them. “You’re awfully far from home.”

“So are you.”

“My purpose is a little better defined than yours, I should think. What’s drawing you to Saint-Nazaire?”

“I’ve a friend who’ll take me in, at least for a while.”

“And then what will you do?”

“I don’t know,” she said, which was technically true, only not in that particular context. “Sam said he was going to ask me to marry him, but obviously that didn’t quite pan out, and now I’m rather without a plan.”

His face softened. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“I knew for a while it wasn’t going to work out, but I…I didn’t want to give up hope. Because he’d always been so kind, and he’d always loved France, but we moved and—well. He changed.”

People who’d just had their worlds turned upside-down always needed to explain things, rationalize them in some way. Even more than most, they had a strange affinity for the liberating feeling that came from confiding in people they barely knew and would likely never see again.

Of course, Lily was lying through her teeth, but Remus had unfolded his arms and was looking at her with curiosity, not suspicion.

He smiled. “I’m glad we could be of some assistance.”

“I’m so indebted to all of you. I really can’t thank you enough.”

When she met people like Remus and Marlene, her deception sometimes seemed ill-advised, and misplaced. But she wouldn’t know them for long, and besides, they were pirates.

The broad-shouldered man and a new man, a shorter one with watery eyes, found their way down the ladder. While neither man was exactly small, only the first carried his weight well.

“Evening,” said the broad-shouldered man, smiling softly. “I’m Caradoc.”

“Lily,” she said.

“I’m pleased to meet you.” He kneeled down on a bed near the ladder and began methodically searching through his trunk.

“Sorry,” she said to the shorter one, who stood at the foot of the bed across from Caradoc. “I don’t think we’ve met.”

His eyes flicked anxiously between her and Remus. “Peter.”

“What’s your station on board?”

He shrugged, with an affected air of disinterest. “Sailor.”

“How long have you been at that, then?” she asked warmly. “It’s very exciting, I should think.”

Peter knelt down on his bed and pointedly turned his face away from Lily. “Long enough.”

He could have been tired – it was late, after all, and Caradoc had already curled up on his bed. Only Remus was still sitting up with her, and he gave her an apologetic smile.

“I think it’s best if we all go to bed,” Remus said. “Plenty of work to be done in the morning, and all that.”

“Honestly, sleep sounds wonderful,” Lily said. “Thank you for your kindness.”

“Oh, our pleasure.” He started to lie down, but then stopped himself. “I wouldn’t normally fuss over these things, only you’re sitting on Sirius’s bed….”

“Ah. Yes.” She climbed to her feet and looked down the row of beds.

“I think you’d be best off in the bed on the other side of me.”

Lily nodded. “Anywhere is better than Brest.”

\--

Creeping along the main deck later only confirmed that there was something terribly strange about James’s ship. Ropes lay in perfect coils on the deck. The sails shone as white as shells in the moonlight, and the rails showed no signs of bird droppings even after sitting in a harbor all day.

Lily had never seen such an immaculate pirate ship before – they must have been fairly early on in their journey. It was plausible that they’d left from England, but that didn’t explain why they’d ported in Brest. It wasn’t more than a few days’ trip from England, and Lily had seen them come into Brest only the night before. Not to mention most pirates would have avoided a military port at all costs.

Drops of wax from her candle splattered on the cloth she’d wrapped around her hand. She’d had to steal from five ships before she could afford this candle, and she wasn’t about to shave off any of it, even the bottom edges to squeeze it into a holder.

She would have run to conserve wax if it wouldn’t have put out the flame, and if the candle were capable of hiding the sounds of her footsteps as well as it did her body. The sound of the ship crashing against the waves covered her tip-toeing, but running on wooden decks tended to be loud enough to attract attention.

Lily glanced up at the crow’s nest, where she could see Dorcas profiled against the stars. By process of elimination, Sirius was somewhere on deck—he’d never come down to bed—and James was likely in his cabin, which was probably on this level of the ship.

She sneaked up the stairs to the quartercastle deck instead – no one was likely to be in the navigation room at this hour, and if nothing else she could take some maps and compasses. A good map was worth a few months’ room and board if she could find the right buyer. She’d have to go to a bigger port than Saint-Nazaire, but she could sell off a lesser map for passage to the Netherlands, or maybe Spain.

She peered in a small port window – the clear light of the moon fell across a sprawling table covered in maps and charts. No crew members, though.

Lily slowly turned the handle and tugged the door open, just wide enough to slip inside, and pulled it shut behind her.

She blew out her candle and wrapped it in the cloth. After a glance at the door, she withdrew her mokeskin pouch from the bust of her dress and turned it inside-out, dumping the few coins it held on the table. She pulled the drawstring shut, reopened it, and placed the candle inside the now cavernous pouch. Once she’d reversed it again, she dropped her coins back in and shoved it back in her dress.

At first glance, the maps on the table seemed to be fairly standard profiles of the French coast. Nothing to get excited about. A few more rolled up maps in the corner looked promising, or…. A cabinet, that was better. People liked to put valuable maps away until they needed them.

Lily strode over to the narrow cabinet in the corner and tugged at the door.

It didn’t give.

Her mouth curved into a smile. She pulled a hairpin out from her bun, slipped it into the lock, and after a quick twist, the door sprung open.

She reached inside—

“I hoped I’d be the one to catch you.”

Lily spun around, folding the hairpin into her palm, her heart trying to leap from her chest.

Sirius lounged against the open door, a smug grin on his face. “I asked for the graveyard shift, in fact, once James told me he didn’t trust you. I don’t take kindly to women taking advantage of my best mate, you see.”

“What do you mean, catch me?” She frowned. “I’m only looking around – couldn’t sleep. I don’t get many opportunities to wander around ships. I think they’re fascinating.”

“I saw you go into that cabinet.”

“So? I’m a little nosy, my mother always said so. It’s just a cabinet.”

Sirius arched an eyebrow. “That cabinet was locked.”

Lily mentally cursed, her palms sweating. He had several inches on her and plenty more muscle—no sword, though, which meant if she could get to her pouch quickly enough…. Lying still seemed the most viable option for the moment.

“Was it?” She glanced back at the cabinet door in feigned confusion. “Maybe someone forgot to lock it. It opened fine for me.”

He beckoned her closer. “Then what’ve you got in your hand?”

She couldn’t drop her hairpin, not without him seeing, and saying she wasn’t holding anything was beyond idiotic.

“It’s just a hairpin,” she said dismissively, and she shoved it up into her hair among her other pins before he had taken a step forward.

He marched across the room to tower over her. “Give it to me.”

“It’s _mine_. You’ve no right to it.”

“I’ll rip them all out of your hair if you don’t give it to me.”

“Sirius,” James called.

Lily leaned sideways to see him standing in the doorway, arms folded over his chest.

“You know, I thought we’d covered the difference between threatening and summoning,” James said, exasperated. “Do we need to go over it again?”

Sirius brushed a lock of hair out of his eyes. “Where’s the fun in summoning?”

James sighed. “Come on, Lily. To my cabin.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Story soundtrack: http://fetchalgernon.tumblr.com/post/71253808548/tyrannys-disease-soundtrack


	2. Parley

Not much distinguished the captain’s cabin from other ships Lily had been on. The same rear-facing windows, dark woods, and ornate trim decorated the room, all warmly lit up in candlelight gold. An alcoved bench built into the ship served as a cozy reading nook near the windows. At least, Lily would have used it as a reading nook, and James certainly had more books on his shelves than most of the captains she’d encountered. Clothes hung haphazardly on the chairs around the table in the middle of the room, and Lily couldn’t see the top of the desk for all the parchment strewn over it.

She took it all in absently, mind otherwise occupied devising reasons for being in the navigation room. She’d been caught, but she could still salvage the situation.

She stood by the door while James grabbed a chair from the table and swung it around to sit backwards on it.

“Your crew is terribly rude,” she said, putting on an affronted look, “threatening to attack me like that—”

“Oh, do tell,” he said, resting his elbows on the back of the chair, “what excuse would you like to offer up? Sleepwalking? Looking for the loo?”

“I was only looking around, and then your—whatever his position is—”

“Navigator.”

“—yes, him, started hurling accusations my way.”

“No,” James corrected, “you were sneaking. You already played me false once with that man in the alley.”

“How _dare_ you—”

“I’m rather disinclined to trust witches who lie their way onto my ship.”

Lily’s heart hammered against her chest. “I can be unkind on occasion,” she said, “but _witch_ —”

“Don’t play the fool,” he said sharply. “That cabinet was magically locked.”

It was possible, of course, that the cabinet had been magically locked. Her hairpin opened any lock, Muggle or magical, and gave no indication either way.

“Which means,” he continued, “that your hairpin is something special. A magical item, in fact, and you must be a witch.”

If their cabinet was magically locked, at least that meant they were witches and wizards themselves. Probably.

“There’s no need for name-calling,” she said, just in case.

“The thing is, Lily, you saw our ship. No one sees my ship. Unless….” He trailed off and raised his eyebrows.

Oh. _Oh_. She’d been so stupid. The ship had some sort of spell on it to hide it from Muggles.

Habit encouraged her to keep lying, to pretend she was some naïve Muggle-born who didn’t know what she was, but that seemed rather futile, and pointless.

She crossed her arms over her chest. “It’s not like I knew you were _magical_ pirates.”

He quirked his lips. “Oh, of course not.”

“I didn’t, though.”

“You know, there’s this funny thing that happens when you start out lying, where your integrity gets entirely ruined.” He stood up from his chair and walked over to look out the window. “So, Lily, if that is your name, what were you intending to do on my ship? Presumably more than gain passage to Saint-Nazaire.”

She pressed her lips together. She wouldn’t incriminate herself, even to fellow thieves. There were penalties for stealing from pirates, harsher and more immediate ones than any governmental system would condemn her to. But they didn’t have much proof of a crime at the moment – all she’d done was break into a cabinet.

“Let’s try this,” James said, turning back to her. “You’re from England, yes?”

“Yes,” she said, voice curt.

“Are you actually trying to get to Saint-Nazaire?”

“I am.”

“Why?”

“I’ve a friend who’s offered to put me up for a while. I needed passage.”

“You’re lying, actually,” he said with confidence, strolling toward her. “If that were the case, you could’ve gone with any old ship. No, you wanted passage on my ship specifically. But where I get lost is why.”

Lily lifted her chin as he stopped in front of her. “I don’t have to answer to you.”

“You’re not obligated to do anything, true. But you are stuck on my ship and I’m not planning to go to Saint-Nazaire.”

Stuck on his ship was promising – stuck was at least alive.

“Then where will you drop me off?” she asked.

He slanted a grin at her. “Who said I was dropping you off?”

“What, you want me to follow around your crew indefinitely?”

“The thing is, Lily, I can’t just let you walk away.”

Hopefully that was not a reference to cutting off her legs.

“Why _not_?” she said.

He grinned, in the way Lily imagined the devil would, cocksure and triumphant. “Because. As you so accurately deduced, I’m a pirate.”

Indefinite imprisonment seemed a strange way for magical pirates to handle a simple matter of thievery, but Lily had nothing to compare it against. Neither Sev’s magic lessons nor her mother’s pirate lessons had ever covered magical pirate codes. She hadn’t even known there was such a thing as magical pirates.

Still, even if she didn’t know their punishments, there was one aspect of piracy that surely even magical pirates followed.

“In that case, Captain Potter, I would like to invoke the right of parley.”

He nodded slowly, mulling it over. “What would you want in this parley? Passage to Saint-Nazaire?”

“I’m not fussed where you drop me off, but I’d obviously like to get off this ship sooner rather than later.”

“I suppose that’s an easy enough request.”

“And what do you want in return?”

“Nothing much, really. I want you to tell me the truth about who you are and why you’re on my ship.”

“That’s it? I can tell you that now, and you can still make Saint-Nazaire by tomorrow night.”

“The problem is, I won’t know if you’re telling the truth or not. I don’t have Veritaserum on board and you’ve proven yourself adept at lying.”

“For parley I’ll tell the truth.”

“See, you clearly don’t understand trust. It’s a crucial element in any productive relationship. You’ve already lost mine, so how can I _know_ you’re telling the truth?”

Lily let out a short breath. “Then how can I earn your trust so you’ll believe me so I can get off your ship?”

He shrugged. “I suppose it’ll just take time.”

“Time.”

“Yes.”

“How long, exactly?”

“I’m sure I don’t know.”

That wasn’t much of a parley, if he got to arbitrarily determine when she’d fulfilled her end of the bargain. But he could’ve asked for lashings as punishment for her crime, or worse.

If this was the bargain she was getting into, she only had to make the terms starkly clear. Her mum had taken every opportunity to negotiate with Lily, tricking her into eating her vegetables or into revising her lessons.

“So you propose,” Lily said, “to keep me on your ship until such a time as you trust me to tell you the truth about why I boarded your ship, at which point you’ll drop me off at the next major European port in full health with my current effects.”

“Well,” he said, drawing out the word.

“Well, what?”

“If the truth turns out to be something I dislike, then I’m afraid I won’t be dropping you off.”

“So I have to earn your trust, convince you I’m telling the truth, and then you _might_ let me go?”

“What can I say,” he said, that smug grin still stretched across his face, “I’m a pirate.”

Admittedly there wasn’t any good argument to that, but at least she’d be safe temporarily. Provided he was a man of his word, anyway.

“But you won’t lock me up in the meantime?” she said.

“If you misbehave I will.”

“And what counts as misbehaving?”

A smile played across his lips. “Oh, I’ll know it when I see it.”

“You’re _enjoying_ this.”

“A beautiful woman lies her way onto my ship and then I have to keep her around? Yeah,” he said, “I am.”

His blasé attitude made her palm want to connect forcefully with his face, but she reminded herself that his terms were actually quite favorable.

Although he did seem to be willing to let her look like an idiot in front of the crew.

“Why did you let me on when you knew I was a witch?” she asked.

“You would’ve fooled me had it not been for the Muggle-repelling charms,” he said. “I let you on because I wanted to see what would happen. I needed to see if you were a threat, and if so….”

“What are you afraid I’ll do, exactly?”

“Frankly, I think you’re here to sabotage my ship.”

“And why would I do that?”

His eyes roved over her from head to toe, assessing, not leering. “You tell me.”

“That doesn’t—you’re impossible.”

“ _I_ don’t have to prove anything. You’ve already proven you’ve got ulterior motives. I just need to know what they are before I decide what to do with you.”

He wasn’t being entirely unreasonable, but it still grated that she’d walked into a trap. She’d always expected to get caught eventually, true. And she had been caught wandering around on other ships before, but she’d always been able to lie her way through an excuse. This particular situation was…unanticipated.

There was only the chance to make the best of it.

“So I’ll be given room and board at your expense until you free me,” she said.

“Naturally. Although I wouldn’t mind if you paid the amount we agreed upon for passage to Saint- Nazaire.”

“And if I don’t?”

“Well, to be honest, I’m already going to take everything you own, most of which will get returned to you if I free you. It’s really just a matter of whether you give it willingly or not.”

Her nails dug into her arms where they remained folded across her chest. “ _If_ you free me.”

“I make no promises. If you’re here to do what I think you are, then I’m definitely not letting you go.”

“If I _were_ going to sabotage your ship—which I’m not—wouldn’t it make sense to just kill me before I get the chance?”

“Would you like me to kill you?”

Lily arched an eyebrow at him.

“As I thought,” he said. “And I would prefer, all things equal, _not_ to kill you, so I’m glad we’re in agreement on that. Honestly, I think there’s a good chance you’re telling the truth, that you aren’t here for sabotage, but I can’t know for sure until I trust you.”

She bit her lip to keep from saying something she’d regret.

“Look, I’m taking a risk here, too, you know,” he added. “I’m not being as harsh as I could – like you said, I could just kill you now. I’d rather not, and I’d love to trust you, but I’ve got plenty of reasons to believe there are magical saboteurs searching for me and my ship.”

“Which are?”

“Either you already know and there’s no point in telling you, or you don’t know, which is how I prefer things anyway.”

All Lily had to do was prove she wasn’t a saboteur, an easy enough task considering it was the truth. She had to be able to get them to trust her within a couple weeks at the outside. During that time they’d probably take port somewhere, depending on where they were going, and she could try to escape if things were moving too slowly.

“Where is your crew headed?” she asked. “Only I’d like to get a general sense of direction so I can think about upcoming ports and where you might drop me off.”

“You’ll figure it out, I’m sure, clever girl like you.”

“Perfect. Thanks.”

He stepped around her and she turned in place to keep an eye on him, but he only reached for the door.

“If you’re going to stay on board,” he said, “you could help out, you know. You did offer to cook and clean.”

“I’m really not very good at either,” she said, which was not a lie.

“Fair enough.” He opened the door. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to finally go to sleep. I’ll have Sirius wake Marlene to check you over for your belongings.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“I did say I’d take everything from you. It’s not meant to be humiliating. It’s just a precautionary measure, in case you have other magical items that might help you with whatever your mission may or may not be.”

His only crime was not being an idiot, but that was a small comfort in the face of effective imprisonment.

“And of course,” he said, holding out his palm, “I’ll need all your hairpins before you go.”

\--

In the morning James had Lily stay in his cabin while he addressed the crew. She fidgeted in Marlene’s dress and tapped her fingers on the table. All night she’d tried to think of a way to escape, but nothing reasonable had come to mind.

“You’re the one who betrayed our trust,” Sirius said, much too smug for Lily’s liking. “No need to look so sour.”

“It’s not that,” she said flatly. “It’s my time of the month.” It wasn’t true, but it did make Sirius look away uncomfortably, and she smirked.

The door opened and, of all things, a cat wandered in.

A cat with wild orange fur and an eye patch.

Lily’s mouth opened, and then closed.

“I had to hide him last night,” James told Lily as he followed the cat through the door. He’d donned a worn three-corner hat, tufts of hair sticking out underneath. “He can’t defend himself like the others.”

“You didn’t find a wand on me, if you recall,” she said. “What sort of threat could I be?”

“We’ll have to find out, won’t we?” He grinned. “This is Algernon, by the way.”

“Your cat is wearing an eye patch,” Lily felt compelled to point out.

“He is! Although he’s none too pleased about it.”

Algernon strutted over to Lily and plopped down on the ground in front of her, his face tilted up, expectant.

“Hello, there.” She lowered her palm in offering, and Algernon sniffed it twice before licking it. “You’re harmless, aren’t you?” She petted his ears, and he purred quietly.

“Oh, sure,” James told his cat, “get revenge on me by befriending our enemy. Don’t think I can’t see right through your plans, Algernon. Your psychological tricks won’t work on me.”

For lack of other options, Lily looked to Sirius for confirmation that James was a lunatic. But Sirius was watching James intently, an eager, almost pleased look on his face.

“Right,” she said slowly. “In any case, I thought of an addendum to our parley last night – I won’t take part in any raids you might make while I’m on board.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” James said.

Sirius snorted. “Aren’t you a generous captain.”

“I mean it,” Lily said. “I don’t want to get involved.”

“Trust me.” James picked up a piece of parchment from the table. “I’ve got more important things on my mind than raiding any random ship we come across.”

There were very few things that would lure pirates away from raiding, but it didn’t really matter since she would hopefully be off the ship soon enough.

“Anyway, you’re released from my cabin,” James told her. “Everyone’s been properly warned about you now.”

“Yes, I’m certain they’re now properly afraid of an unarmed witch. Thanks for that.”

“Oh, I’m sure you can be plenty dangerous if you want.”

She gave him a mocking salute and wandered out onto the deck, preening a little in the sunlight. There were few pleasures as lovely as the warm sea air whipping overhead, the thick, clean smell of salt on the wind.

Near the front of the main deck, Dorcas walked alongside the rail, the tip of her wand hovering just above the wood. She looked blankly at Lily when she walked by. “I told him to kill you.”

Lily’s hand twitched, eager to grab her mokeskin pouch—but Marlene had confiscated it. The only weapons on board were wands, by the look of it, and those were all but useless to Lily.

She pressed her lips together and walked on.

“Thanks for your vote of confidence,” Lily said as she brushed pass Dorcas.

James had given her free rein on board and she didn’t have to stand by and listen to idle threats. Unfortunately there was nowhere else to go, really. Normally at this stage of the trip, she’d have several valuables tucked in her mokeskin pouch and would spend the day further befriending the crew, lest they suspect any ulterior motives. But now she’d been caught, and with such a skeletal crew, everyone was occupied.

There was nothing to do but explore, particularly if she was going to be confined to the ship for an indefinite amount of time.

She’d already seen the gun deck and most of the main deck—although she did want another look at the library between the main deck and James’s cabin—and she now was plenty familiar with the navigation room.

Together that comprised the majority of the ship. She had no interest in the orlop deck—it wasn’t worth crawling around the bottom of the ship if she had nowhere to store anything valuable she found—which left the room at the front of the ship, under the foremast. If nothing else it would offer the best view of where the ship was headed.

She didn’t look out the windows when she entered, though, her eyes instead drawn to Caradoc. He stood with his wand outstretched, directing a parade of dishes through the air and onto a long wooden table.

“Good morning.” He smiled, keeping his eyes on the silverware. “Breakfast’s almost ready. Oi, to the left, now,” he gently scolded a recalcitrant fork. Chastened, the fork budged over into perfect alignment with the knife and spoon next to the plate.

Lily stood mesmerized for a moment at his casual use of magic, the way the plates hung effortlessly in the air. Her heart twinged in jealousy.

She glanced at the table, and then at the door. “Should I….”

“Oh, you’re more than welcome to join us.” The last fork settled into place and Caradoc looked up at her. “I’d hate for you to eat alone.”

“Thanks,” she said, her voice coming out more uncertainly than she’d intended.

“I’ll be back in a moment,” Caradoc said.

Lily nodded, unsure what else to do, and he disappeared out onto the main deck.

She hadn’t seen anything like this room on other ships. Then again, most other ships barely had enough space for the crew to sleep and eat – this ship had the luxury of a room clearly designed for lounging.

Most of the windows faced out onto the ocean ahead of them – they were headed southwest by the look of it. A few rays of sunlight streaked across the room from the porthole windows, falling on top of the cozy sofa and chairs nestled in front of the main windows, the back of the sofa dividing the sitting and dining areas. Bookshelves lined the walls, filled with trinkets and books and bottles of liquor, all apparently magically restrained to keep from falling off in the rocking of the waves.

Lily wandered over to examine the book titles and let her fingers trail along the tops of the spines, all dust-free, as she read. She’d only got through one row when she heard footsteps approaching the room. She turned to see Marlene stroll through the door and smile at Lily.

“Plenty of time for books later.” Marlene slid into a chair at the table. “Come on, Caradoc’s just on his way up.”

Lily chose a seat next to Marlene and offered a weak smile. Marlene didn’t seem to be outraged that Lily had lied to her, and Lily wasn’t about to turn down another friendly face.

The door opened again, and this time Dorcas marched in. She took one look at Lily sitting at the table, scowled, and spun around to leave.

But she ran into Remus in the doorway.

“Not joining us for breakfast?” he asked.

Dorcas scoffed and waited for Remus to move. When he did, she stomped back out onto the main deck.

“Oh, for Merlin’s sake.” Marlene pushed back her chair and chased after Dorcas.

Remus smiled at her as she passed and joined Lily at the table. “You understand, I’m sure.”

“The impulse to kill strangers? No, I never caught that illness, fortunately.”

“I take it she told you what she told James.”

Lily gave him a wry grin. “It was the first thing out of her mouth when she saw me.”

“Well, you’ve got to give her points for transparency.”

Peter poked his head into the room. “Is breakfast ready?”

“Nearly,” Remus said. “Caradoc will have it up in a moment.”

Peter sat next to Remus and muttered something to him, inaudible to Lily. She looked away, pretending they weren’t so obviously talking about her.

Dorcas stepped through the door once more, her arms folded tightly over her chest. Marlene came through right behind her wearing a fond smile, one hand pushing Dorcas forward. She released Dorcas at the head of the table, far away from Lily, and nudged her toward the chair. Dorcas dropped into the seat and pointedly looked anywhere but at Lily.

Marlene retook her seat next to Lily and leaned in toward Lily, hushed and apologetic. “I told Dorcas if you tried anything really dangerous, she could kill you.”

Lily’s stomach turned. Hearing it from Dorcas was—well, it seemed like something she’d do. But Marlene had seemed nice.

“She’s funny that way,” Marlene added thoughtfully.

“Did James agree to that?”

“Oh, it wouldn’t matter. He needs us and if you’re dead, you’re dead. No coming back from that. But it’ll be fine. I didn’t think you’d try to kill us. And now you’ve got extra incentive not to, I suppose.”

Lily was spared from having to reply by Caradoc’s entrance. Platters heaped high with bacon and eggs floated through the air behind him, a happy procession of food that flowed around Caradoc and onto the table. They landed with a small clatter, and Caradoc smiled.

“Happy breakfast,” he said, sitting on the other side of Lily.

Which brought Lily to having two allies, three if James was included in the group of People Who Didn’t Want to Kill Lily. Or maybe he brought it to two and a half, since Marlene would let Dorcas kill her under the right circumstances.

Silence reigned while everyone served themselves, Dorcas still ignoring Lily, and Peter glancing at both women nervously.

“So,” Lily said, half to break the awkward silence and half out of hope. “Where are we headed?”

Dorcas slanted a savage glance at Lily.

“I’m afraid we’re not permitted to share that information,” Remus said.

“Ah.” Lily shoved a forkful of egg into her mouth.

“But I’m sure I speak for the group,” Remus said, “when I ask who _you_ are, Lily.”

“Oh, I’m no one, really. Just a—” She didn’t think of herself as much of anything besides a person, and she’d never explicitly told anyone what she did before. Sam and everyone else she’d got to know in her brief stays in cities had recognized a fellow thief immediately. “I’m a simple English girl who finds her way onto a surprising number of pirate ships and walks away finding that somehow something valuable has fallen into my possession.”

“You’re a thief,” Peter ventured.

“Pirate,” Dorcas muttered.

Lily ignored her and nodded at Peter instead.

Marlene sipped her juice, a strange orange one that didn’t smell familiar to Lily. “That’s a bit of a dangerous job, isn’t it?”

“Only if you get caught,” Lily said.

Remus raised his eyebrows. “And you have.”

“But luckily for you,” Marlene said cheerfully, “we don’t make people walk the plank around here.”

Peter looked vaguely upset over this, which made Lily all the more grateful that at least half of the crew didn’t want to kill her. Although one person wishing her dead was really one too many.

Remus gave Marlene a mischievous smile. “Not anymore, we don’t.”

Marlene threw her head back and laughed.

Lily wasn’t cut out for a full-on pirate life. She could never laugh about killing someone.

She focused on her plate, lest she provide them justification for reinstituting the plank, and savored the eggs and bacon. Muggle pirate ships relied on much less elegant food and drink, but with magic they could keep food from spoiling. And on top of the fresher supplies, Caradoc seemed to be an excellent cook. A quiet one, too – he hadn’t spoken since the others had joined them, although he appeared to be following the thread of conversation.

“Oh, _yes,_ ” Marlene said. “I’ll never forget the splash he made.”

Remus sighed, much too happily, in Lily’s opinion.

“Enough with the reminiscing,” Dorcas said sharply, although she ruined it by smirking. “Brilliant as that day was.”

By the feel of it, the eggs in Lily’s stomach had suddenly gone off. She ducked her head down and poked at her food.

As the others ate, Dorcas began barking out directives for the day about the maintenance they needed to perform on the ship. Some of the instructions sounded familiar, about tacking and decks and sails, but other terms were entirely new. They sounded like magic, which explained how they managed with such a skeletal crew.

“Do you have anything that Lily might do?” Remus asked. “James requested she help out if possible.”

Lily suppressed a scowl.

“She is _not_ to touch my ship,” Dorcas said.

“Very well. It’s your call,” Remus said. “Sorry, Lily.”

“No complaints from me.”                                                                      

Dorcas nodded. “Then everyone else, get to work.”

“As she said,” Remus told the group.

Everyone pushed back from their seats and began filing out the door. Caradoc served up two plates, presumably for Sirius and James, and handed one to Dorcas and one to Peter.

Lily stayed in her seat for lack of a better option, and soon only she and Caradoc were left.

“Can I help you at all?” she asked. “Dorcas only said not to touch the ship.”

“Oh, no, I’m fine. Thank you for offering.”

Lily nodded, and with a lift of Caradoc’s wand, all the dishes lifted up again and trailed him out the door.

She tapped her fingers on the table, alone once more and with no clear objective in sight. Even doing dishes would have been better than sitting around aimlessly.

She sighed and went back to inspect the bookcase. Everyone else might have left her, but books would always be there.

\--

Lily sat curled up on the sofa, an anthology of Aristophanes’s plays in hand, when James and his cat strolled in a couple hours later. She could have ignored him him—she was enjoying _Lysistrata_ much more as an adult than when her mother had read it to her—but she was, perforce, trying to win him over.

“I see you’ve settled in for a holiday,” he said.

“Dorcas has forbidden me from touching her ship.” Lily marked her place in the book with her finger as he stopped behind the sofa. “So I’m going to let the two of you sort that out.”

“You could clean the deck without being much threat.”

“I don’t know about that. I am an enormous threat, per your own determination.”

“And per my own determination you’re perfectly capable of simple tasks.”

“I could be completely useless for all you know. My skills lie in areas other than domestic work.”

“Yes, I did notice.”

His cat had sat down on the ground and was pushing at his eye patch with a paw. She nearly reached down to help him take it off, but surely even James, slightly mad as he might seem, had a reason for putting an eye patch on his cat.

James leaned forward, resting his hands on the back of the sofa. “I’d like you to join me for dinner tonight.”

“And I’d like to get off this ship. Trade you?”

“Not really a trade so much as a request.”

“I can’t imagine why you’d want to dine with a dangerous woman like myself. I might accidentally kill you.”

“Well, I figure I’m the one who really needs to trust you, and how better to get to know you than over dinner?”

Lily raised an eyebrow. “You just think I’m beautiful.”

“It’s true, that’s certainly a perk,” he mused. “Much better than looking at Sirius over the table. I think he chews with his mouth open to spite his parents, even when they’re not around.”

“I’d prefer to eat with the crew, even if it means more threats from Dorcas.”

“I’m sure you would.”

But he looked at her expectantly, and she sighed.

“I’d be happy to join you,” she said through a forced smile.

“You know, blatantly lying is really not doing much to make me trust you.”

Lily dropped her smile. “In that case I’ll be there despite how I feel about it.”

“As I thought.”

After he and Algernon had left, Lily set down the book on the table in front of her and moved to stand near the windows. They’d tacked another direction now, but they were still moving southwest.

James could be going a variety of places: the Mediterranean, the Caribbean, Africa, India. If it were anything but the first, they’d have to take port at least once before they reached their destination. Unless, of course, they really did have that many supplies on board thanks to magic. But surely magical pirates needed time on land as much as the next person, and they’d stop for a change of pace eventually, regardless of their supplies.

At least she hoped as much. She’d have no chance of escape until they stopped.

Which meant, of course, that she had to work on alternate methods in the meantime, and the only real option was to convince James and the crew to trust her.

By and large, pirates were very single-minded. Some were brutal, ruthless in their ambition for gold and silver and women, their ships often on the brink of yet another mutiny. Other pirates followed very strict codes of honor and behavior; they still raided ships and sacked cities, but they would only kill as a last resort.

So far James and his crew seemed to fall into the latter category, but they didn’t quite fit there, not with the callous way they’d joked about the plank, or about letting Dorcas kill Lily.

Besides Dorcas, everyone else seemed decent enough on the surface. Then again, Lily had only just met them and had no idea what sorts of sordid things they’d done as a crew in the past. These were the first wizards she’d been in prolonged contact with besides Severus. Maybe having magical powers gave most witches and wizards some sort of superiority complex. Sev had never been that way, but he might have been the exception.

Regardless, Lily needed to convince them she wasn’t a threat, and at least she didn’t have to convince everyone. Caradoc and Marlene seemed to be on her side already. Remus and James didn’t trust her but they didn’t seem to mind her, either. Peter and Sirius had made their dislike clear, and Dorcas wanted her dead.

That really wasn’t too dire a situation, death threats aside. She was never going to persuade Dorcas to care for her, but she could probably win over James and Remus. James thought she was pretty, and Remus at least seemed to respect her.

Tempted as she was to sit and read in the sun, she had more important things to do.


	3. Still Not a Saboteur

Lily stepped out onto the main deck in search of Remus, but she only saw Marlene standing on the quarterdeck and, curiously, James up in the crow’s nest.

Captains didn’t typically take on lookout duties, but then again, captains didn’t normally operate with such small crews. James had six watch shifts and six crew members, excluding the cook. He could have asked someone to take two shifts, like many of the pirate captains Lily had met would have, but he hadn’t.

Lily crossed the deck to check the library, but when she tried to enter, the handle didn’t give.

She would have climbed down the ladder to look for him if Dorcas weren’t sleeping on the gun deck, so instead she scaled the stairs to Marlene, who stood with one hand on the helm, the other casting spells at the sails.

Lily smiled. “Hi.”

“Hi. Getting bored yet?”

“I am well on the way.”

Marlene sighed, although it seemed a little put-on. “Shame you lied to us, or you could have helped out.”

“Not really. I don’t have a wand.”

“Could’ve borrowed one? Yeah, I dunno. Seems a shame to miss out on the additional help.”

“I’m also clueless how to make a ship run with magic.”

Marlene finished a spell that adjusted a system of ropes and pocketed her wand. “Oh, anyone can learn. We did, didn’t we?”

“Presumably.” Lily couldn’t admit to being vastly inexperienced with magic, so she said, “James wasn’t at breakfast. Does he normally eat by himself?”

Marlene leaned backwards against the helm. “Yeah. Thinks it’s captain-like to give us our space.”

“Apparently he’s lonely in his own space – he invited me to dine with him tonight.”

Marlene’s face lit up and she stood upright again. “You should dress up!”

Lily frowned. “Why?”

“Because it’s fun?”

The dresses Lily’s parents had forced her into when they’d entertained guests had been useless for running about and climbing trees. Lily had always proudly come back to the servants with ripped hems and grass stains.

But personal preferences were not the priority at the moment.

“Well, is James going to dress up?” Lily asked.

“He’s always dressed up a bit.”

He did have a finer shirt than the rest of the crew, and no one else wore a hat.

If she dressed up, he could take it as a sign that she was trying to do what he wanted. Which might show that she had no ill intentions, or show that she was trying to manipulate him.

Of course, she was trying to manipulate him into trusting her. But only because he was making her.

Lily sighed. “Will he be happier if I dress up?”

“Well, you’d be prettier to look at, if nothing else.”

“He did mention that I’m better to look at than Sirius.”

Marlene laughed. “That’s true enough. We’ll find you something to wear after lunch, before I go to bed.”

“Didn’t you sleep all night?”

“No, I did some work after you—well. Normally I take the graveyard shift here but James wanted…you know.”

James hadn’t just been prepared for her to wander about – he’d encouraged it by reducing the number of people on duty, the snake.

“Sirius mentioned something to the crew,” Marlene said, “only he won’t ask, he’s too bloody proud, but I’m not – how did you get into the navigation room without anyone seeing you? Sirius said he watched the deck for you, but you just showed up in the room, and we’ve warded the boat with Anti-Apparition spells.”

Lily bit back a smile. “I’m actually a ghost.”

“Possible, except I think we’ve already disproved that one.”

“Figment of your imagination?”

“We haven’t been at sea nearly long enough for that yet, and even if we had, I hope we’d have a more exciting mass delusion than you. No offense.”

“What do you think?”

“Well, Sirius reckons you’re an Animagus.”

Lily hesitated. “I’m not familiar with that spell.”

“How can you not know what an Animagus is?”

“What can I say, my education focused more on classic literature than spells.”

Marlene’s eyes flicked up and down Lily. “Where did you go to school, exactly?”

“I’ve only ever had governesses,” Lily said truthfully, neglecting to mention none of them had been for teaching her magic.

“Oh.” All hints of suspicion dropped off of Marlene’s face, and were replaced by something closer to pity. “Are you like…well, I know seeing magical things doesn’t mean you’ve got…I mean, you didn’t go to Hogwarts.”

Lily lifted her chin, her hands finding their way to her hips. “Not for a lack of invitation, thank you very much.”

“That’s a shame. That you didn’t go, I mean. I think we’d have been there around the same time. Before.”

“Before….”

“Before You Know Who,” Marlene said, as if it were obvious. “He Who Must Not Be Named.”

“Is that one of those voodoo pirate things? Because voodoo has always seemed unnecessarily complicated for magic, at least what I’ve heard about it from other pirates.”

“How can you not—” Marlene narrowed her eyes. “Wait, are you taking the mickey again?”

“About _what_?”

Marlene cocked her head. “You’ve really no idea what I’m talking about, do you?”

“How could I when you haven’t even told me the name of the person we’re discussing? What’s so special about him that he _mustn’t be named_?”

“But—where have you _been_ the last two years?

“Around.” Lily crossed her arms over her chest. “It’s not easy making a living these days.”

Marlene stared at her for a few moments, apparently unable to fathom that Lily wouldn’t know someone who didn’t appear to have an actual name. Then comprehension dawned on her face. “Hang on a minute—are your parents Muggles?”

Sev had told her not to tell people she was a Muggle-born witch, which she’d assumed was more about revealing her magic than her heritage. But the way Marlene asked about her parents….

“No,” Lily lied.

“But then…you don’t know who You Know Who is,” Marlene said, forehead wrinkling.

“That’s a bloody stupid name. Do people call him that to his face?”

“That’s not his _name_. You just can’t say it or—but how do you not know this if you’re not Muggle-born?”

“I don’t know,” Lily hedged. “I’ve been busy.”

“You know, it’s all right if you are Muggle-born. We’re not—well, we’re not You Know Who.”

“Well, I’m not.”

“But really. I mean. Are you lying? Either you’re a very, very good saboteur, or you’re completely ignorant.”

“Oi, I’m not _completely_ ignorant.”

“But you _are_.” Marlene reached out and adjusted the helm with one hand. “I mean, you don’t know anything, do you?”

“I know loads of things, thank you.”

“But nothing—I mean, how can you be—I suppose if you’ve been pirating the past few years—when did you start that?”

“But you already—how did you know I’ve been gone for two years?” Lily asked suspiciously.

“I didn’t. But you started two years ago?”

“What of it?”

Marlene’s lips pressed together. “That’s awfully convenient timing.”

“With _what_?”

Marlene didn’t answer right away, instead sizing Lily up. “Well, if you really are that ignorant, then I’m definitely not afraid of you.”

“Oi, I can be plenty dangerous. That is, I’m not going to hurt you, but I can handle myself. I’ve fought off pirates before.”

“But you’re not dangerous. At least, not the way we care about. I’d better not say anything more.”

“Why not?” Lily demanded.

“Because if it’s a trick, then I’m not falling for it. And if it’s not a trick, well.”

“Well?”

Marlene smiled, sad and humorless. “If it’s not a trick, I don’t want to have to be the one to tell you.”

\--

Lunch was a no more comfortable affair than breakfast. Although Dorcas had gone to bed after breakfast, Sirius had just woken up.

“You’re still here?” he said, eyeing her coolly.

“Suicide hasn’t presented itself as a favorable option yet, but you’re making me rethink that.”

“Excellent news.”

But after Marlene had shoved down more chicken than Lily had thought one woman could consume, she dragged Lily below deck to rummage through her trunk, grinning eagerly. She outfitted Lily in a deep blue dress made of some satin-type material—Petunia had always cared more for clothing than Lily had—that swirled around her feet when she turned.

Lily left Marlene to sleep and wandered back up to the main deck, where she spotted James behind the helm, his shirt hanging open around his collar as he cast spell after spell at his ship. Peter had taken up watch in the crow’s nest, and Lily went to give the library another go.

But when she tried the handle, it remained locked. She hadn’t had time to attempt anything else before the door opened in front of her.

“Did you need something?” Remus stood in the doorway, hand still on the handle.

“Only a reprieve from boredom.”

Algernon darted out from the library and wound his way around Lily’s legs.

“He is fond of you, isn’t he,” Remus said.

“He is,” Lily said, glancing up at the helm above Remus’s head, “and so’s Algernon.”

Remus bit back a smile. “Care to join me in the common room?”

“If you like,” Lily said, although she didn’t quite understand where he meant. But she followed him across the deck to what she’d started thinking of as the dining room.

“Chess?” Remus asked once they had entered.

Lily grinned. “Oh, yes, please.”

They quickly lost themselves in a game set up on the dining table, sunlight streaming in through the windows behind her. They played in silence at first, gauging the other’s strategy, but fortunately the quiet didn’t last more than a handful of moves.

“You’re quite talented,” Remus said, eyes on the board. Algernon sat curled up on his lap, purring contentedly, his tail flicking.

“You’re a worthy opponent,” Lily said, trying to read Remus’s expression. He didn’t appear to be an emotive man, though, at least not when he actively tried to hide it.

“Who taught you?”

“My father. You?”

“The same.” Remus smiled a little. “He always called it the game of kings.”

“Chess isn’t the game of kings – it’s the game of those who have the king’s ear.”

“An interesting perspective.”

“But I will give you that it is the king of games.”

He slanted a grin at her. “I can see why he likes you. I’m speaking of Algernon, of course.”

“Of course,” Lily said, the corners of her mouth twitching.

She hadn’t played chess in months – most pirates didn’t care for it, aside from the odd captain or first mate. She’d missed it, in a way. She’d spent hours playing with her father as a child, tucked up in a corner of their two-storey high library, staring at the board in frustration as her father bested her over and over again, encouraging her to try harder.

“Does he know what you do for a living?” Remus finally moving a pawn forward. “Your father, that is.”

Lily’s gaze dropped to the board. “No.”

“Then again, I suppose he might not mind, depending on what his profession is.”

“Was,” she corrected. Although it had been years, her heart still twinged at the admission. “And he might’ve cared but he can’t now.”

She moved a knight and risked a glance up at him. He had a knowing sort of look on his face, and Lily averted her eyes and shook her head a little.

“But that’s years ago now,” she said. “What about your parents?”

“Oh, well, my father used to work for the Ministry, in the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures.”

“Before,” Lily said, trying to copy Marlene’s inflection.

He nodded. “As you might expect, the department’s taken a bit of a turn recently, and not precisely in the manner he favors.”

Lily had a hundred questions about the wizarding world and what had happened that was so significant to warrant _Before_ , capitalized and stressed, but whatever it was, she couldn’t risk asking too many things without apparently exposing that she was Muggle-born. She still didn’t know where Sev was, or why he’d gone, but his final letter had been explicitly clear.

So she nodded back at Remus and smiled sympathetically. “Is he doing something else now, then?”

“He’s tried to find work in the Muggle world, but the only exposure he’s had to Muggles has been through my mum and her family. But I wouldn’t say the transition has been entirely successful. He went out in one of her dresses once.”

“Oh, dear.”

“With one of her hats and everything.”

“The dress I can see, but the hat?”

“Well, he thought it was a matched set, you see. And in fairness, she did always wear them together in good company.”

Lily smiled and moved her knight, while Algernon stood up on Remus’s lap, stretched, and dropped elegantly onto the ground.

“Tired of me already?” Remus asked him.

Lily wondered if everyone on board spoke to the cat naturally, or if that was all James’s influence.

Algernon ignored him and strolled toward the door. Lily didn’t understand, at first, what Algernon was planning to do. But then the door magically swung open for him when he approached, allowing him out onto the deck.

And Lily had an idea.

\--

When Lily tried the library door that evening, it opened easily. She took her time walking across the room to James’s cabin – she’d barely had a moment to inspect it the previous night when James had marched her through.

Shelves lined every inch of wall, all overflowing with parchments and books and detritus. Rays from the evening sun filtered through the lace curtains on the windows, casting long shadows over the table in the center of the room.

As she moved closer to James’s cabin, she could hear his muffled voice through the door, probably talking to his cat. But when he opened the door a minute later, Algernon was nowhere in sight.

She reminded herself she was trying to win him over, and smiled.

James smiled back and let his eyes dart up and down. “You look really lovely,” he said, stepping back to let her through.

“Thank you.” She strolled past him and glanced around the room. It looked as it had the night before, only now platters piled high with food covered the table, with place settings for two squeezed in between. He’d tidied up a little, at least removing the clothes from the chairs, but he’d only tossed them in a pile in the corner.

“I didn’t know we had that dress on board.”

“I suspect you’re not personally responsible for the female clothing inventory.”

“And just as well I’m not. Please, sit down.”

“Thank you.” She adjusted her skirts as she lowered herself into the chair, holding her shoulders back and her neck high. She could turn on the standard courtesies when it suited her; there just weren’t many instances where she bothered.

But for her freedom, she’d play the lady as much as needed.

He remained standing and picked up a dark bottle from the table. “Wine?”

She smiled, one of the demure ones her father had taught her. “Please.”

James poured wine into two goblets, ending with a flourish, and held one out to her.

She took it and graced him with another smile, this one mischievous. “Are you trying to seduce me?”

His mouth curved up at one end. “Would you like me to?”

“A lady never says.”

He laughed a little, mostly to himself. “For the moment I’m only trying to seduce you into giving me your secrets.”

“Pity,” she said lightly, and took a sip of wine. It was surprisingly well chosen for a pirate, a good match for the food in front of them.

He lowered himself into the seat across from her. “I’m sorry I had to take you prisoner.”

“I find that hard to believe, based on your own comments.”

“All right,” he said, grinning, “so it’s a little fun having someone new on my ship.”

He picked up a napkin and draped it over his lap, and Lily followed suit.

“You know,” she said, “I do understand why you did what you did. You’ve got to protect your crew.”

He raised his eyebrows, both in approval and, if she wasn’t mistaken, a bit of surprise. “I’m glad we’re in agreement about something, at least.”

“But I hope you’ll trust me before too long. I’m not interested in the full pirate life.”

“Do you mean to say you’re half a pirate? And, if so, which half?”

“I’m not any sort of pirate, really. I only came on board to, hm, reappropriate some of your items for myself.”

“Is that so.” He picked up his knife and fork. “What were you going to take from me, then? Anything in particular, or whatever struck your fancy?”

“Whatever small valuables I could find. Not everything, just a handful of select items.”

“And that’s all you intended to do, is it?”

She nearly shrugged, but that wasn’t ladylike. Instead she lifted her chin, just a little. “A woman’s got to make a living somehow.”

“That’s a very peculiar brand of piracy you’ve got there.”

“I’m not a _pirate_. Not really.”

“You just said you steal from ships. In my world that’s the very definition of piracy.”

Lily served herself from the dinner platters. “I don’t think so. I imagine piracy as having some element of violence to it, and I didn’t attack you. I would never hurt anyone unless they attacked me first.”

He cocked his head. “But if you’d actually stolen from me, I probably would’ve taken that as license to attack you.”

“The people I steal from don’t have to hurt me. They could just turn me into the Royal Navy. If they choose a violent path, then that’s on them.”

“If they choose to use less than lawful methods, you might still be short a hand, even if you’re their moral superior.”

“Except I’m very good, aren’t I? You’re the first to catch me, and it seems—although it might be premature—that I’ll walk away with a full complement of limbs. You’ve no actual intention of hurting me, unless, I imagine, I hurt you or your crew first.”

They looked evenly at each other for a moment, a silent challenge, and James looked away first. He finished serving himself and began to eat.

She repressed a sigh. She probably hadn’t come off as particularly endearing or trustworthy. Debating the morality of their respective lines of work wasn’t likely to get her anywhere, but she couldn’t let a pirate judge her without arguing.

“While I don’t agree with you,” he said thoughtfully, pointing at her with his fork, a piece of fish dangling precariously on the end, “that was well articulated.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “I’m not an idiot.”

“I gathered.”

“So that’s me,” she said dismissively. “Common thief, not someone working for What’s His Face.”

“You Know Who,” he corrected.

Lily stabbed a carrot with her fork. “Yes, Marlene told me about his idiotic names.”

“She did mention you had a curious lack of knowledge regarding recent events.”

“Well, I’ve been in England a grand total of three days in nearly as many years.”

It wasn’t that Lily didn’t want to know what they were talking about—she did, if only because Marlene had spoken of it so gravely—but James already had the upper hand. She wouldn’t very well bare her ignorance to him and give him more leeway.

“And you’ve no contact with anyone in England?” he asked. “No one at all?”

“No.”

She’d been to England but not home. She’d considered writing a letter to Petunia, once, but she’d never managed to find the words she needed.

“You’re very strange,” he told her.

“I’m not the one with an eye patch on his cat.”

“That’s with good reason. But either you’re a very good saboteur—”

“Or I’m just terribly unlucky, yes, I know.”

He tapped a finger where it held his knife. “I was _going_ to say an uneducated witch who’s playing pirate, and has no idea who You Know Who is or what’s going on in wizarding affairs.”

“I could call you equally uneducated. Just because I don’t know what you know doesn’t mean I don’t know anything.”

“Sorry, not generally uneducated, but in the things that you should know. Non-academic things, I should say. No, you’re plenty clever, but I can’t help but wonder…are you Muggle-born? Marlene told me you say you aren’t, but I’m finding that hard to believe.”

She tried not to let her shoulders tense and focused on cutting another piece of fish. “I don’t see how my parents are relevant.”

“See, if you _were_ a saboteur, I think you’d have a backstory planned out better than that.”

“What?”

“Well, you wouldn’t just outright deny being Muggle-born. That only makes me suspicious.”

“I’m really not following.”

“No.” He picked up his cup of wine. “I really don’t think you are.”

“As your dinner guest, I’d appreciate it if we could discuss something else.”

“Not yet, and since I’m the captain,” he said apologetically. “It’s all right, you know, if you’re Muggle-born. You’re in good company. Not that I am, but Caradoc’s Muggle-born, and Peter and Remus are half-bloods.”

It wasn’t that she didn’t believe him—he seemed genuine, just like Marlene had—but she still trusted Sev over all of them.

“But,” James said, tilting his head, “if you _are_ Muggle-born, why would you feel the need to hide it? Unless you _were_ aware of recent events, that is.”

Lily raised an eyebrow at him. If he wouldn’t tell her everything, she wasn’t obligated to do the same.

“You’re a very confusing person,” he concluded.

“I’m not the one insisting I remain on this ship, I might remind you. You can drop me off in any port. Any one at all, and I’d be more than happy to stop perplexing you.”

He grinned. “I won’t be dropping you off quite yet.”

“You’re a very annoying person,” she retorted.

“Only because I’m demanding simple answers, like who are you and what do you want. Nothing much, really, in the scheme of things.”

“Did I or did I not already tell you why I came on board? I’m certain I did. I was there for it.”

“We’ve covered what you want, yes, but not who you _are_.”

“Weren’t you just telling me you didn’t care if I was Muggle-born?”

“Not your blood I’m worried about so much as your character. How can I trust what you want if I don’t know who you are?”

“I’m not a bad person,” she offered. “Isn’t that all you need to know?”

“Did you or did you not confess to making a living stealing from others? Funny, in my book that’s not under the definition of _good person_.”

“Ah, but I only take from pirates like yourself, so they’ve no right to the items in the first place.”

“A thief of thieves? Oh, I do like that. But couldn’t you just make an honest living?”

“Too dull,” she said, the closest thing to a lie she’d told him besides the self-protective one about her blood status.

His eager smile wilted. “You’re doing this for _fun_.”

A disbelieving laugh escaped her. “I don’t know where you think you get off judging me. There’s only one pirate in the room and it certainly isn’t me.”

James leaned back in his seat, his half-finished plate still in front of him, and linked his hands behind his head. “You still haven’t convinced me you’re not one, but your point is well taken. Still doesn’t lift your own burden, though, or make you a good person if I’m a worse one. By your standards, of course.”

“I think it matters if you’re judging _me_. Let’s not forget who’s part of a group known for pillaging ships and villages.”

“I wasn’t aware thieves ranked higher than pirates on the morality scale. Aren’t we doing the same thing to different people?”

Of course, she was only slightly morally better than a pirate, and she only considered this the case because pirates didn’t take one or two valuables, they took everything.

But she wouldn’t convince him, and that was fine. That wasn’t the objective for the evening anyway. Not that she appeared to have made much progress on that front, either.

He watched her with keen, laughing eyes, waiting for her next volley, and she sighed.

“You know,” she said, “I can’t help but feel I’m not fostering trust.”

He smiled, a curious, knowing sort of smile. It was too close to smug for Lily to appreciate it. “You are persuading me to trust you, but not in the way you think you are.”

He thought she was confusing, but obviously he’d never stopped to listen to himself.

“I don’t know how to convince you to trust me,” she said.

“It goes both ways, you know. It’s very obvious you don’t trust me or my crew, when we’ve given you no reason to distrust us, whereas you’ve proved you’re plenty clever and a practiced liar. By your own admission you’re a criminal.”

Lily scoffed. “No reason? Are you forgetting you let me on board knowing full well I was lying and then arranged circumstances so I would still try to steal from you?”

“That was a _reactionary_ lie. Not even a full lie. Or any lie, technically. A misrepresentation at worst.”

“Not to mention your crew threatened me.”

“Oh, Dorcas?” He laughed, short and deep. “Don’t mind her.”

“Except I do mind, actually.”

“You’re under the protection of parley and, more importantly, my word. I wouldn’t worry about it.”

Clearly it was no matter to him that his crew were beyond his control. And he wondered why Lily didn’t fully trust him.

“So this dinner was pointless,” she said. “You still don’t trust me and I’m still stuck here.”

“Oh, no, I wouldn’t say it was _pointless_. I thought it was fun to talk about this sort of thing. Maybe you didn’t.”

It had been entertaining – certainly much more engaging and challenging than the conversations she’d had in the past several months. She couldn’t admit to that, though.

“You said I’d have free rein of the ship,” she told him.

“And?”

“The door to the library was locked earlier.”

“Oh, yeah. That’ll be Peter working.”

“Well, what if I want to use the library?”

James quirked his eyebrows. “Wait until he’s not working.”

“I don’t understand why he and I can’t both use the room at the same time. It’s not exactly a cupboard.”

“Sorry,” he said insincerely. “He’s got things to do and I don’t want you anywhere near them.”

Lily sat up a little straighter. “So it’s important, what he’s doing.”

“Nah, we just like locking Peter up.”

“So kind, you are.”

“Pirate,” he reminded her.

She pretended to fume about her restricted access so she could have a moment to concentrate on her surroundings. In all likelihood, James had kept her effects in his cabin. She hadn’t tried his door when he wasn’t occupying it, but if he hadn’t already been magically locking it, he probably was now. But hopefully her loophole wouldn’t have occurred to him yet.

“So you’re reneging on our parley,” she said, after she’d had a good look around.

“Not reneging. Amending. You did it yourself this morning.”

“Fair enough,” she said grudgingly.

Once more he’d reasoned her into a corner with no hope of appeal. She nodded absently while he invited her back for dinner the next night, and subtly dropped a piece of fish into her lap.

He might have got her on their agreement, but it didn’t matter. Soon enough she’d have free rein, or close to it, despite him.

\--

James took the latest shift in the crow’s nest, from after dinner until midnight, and Lily spotted Peter in the common room, playing dice and drinking with Marlene and Caradoc – if she was going to try to reclaim her belongings, she wouldn’t have a better chance.

They probably thought she was no threat at all, wandless and without her hairpin, but her mum hadn’t been a pirate for nothing. She’d instilled in her daughter the ability to pick basic locks. _In case you’re ever kidnapped because of your father_ , she’d said, a mischievous gleam in her eye.

Lily tried to use a normal hairpin on James’s door, but as expected, it failed. He’d locked it with magic, and she had no way around that.

But James clearly hadn’t designed the ship with the intention of holding people captive.

She stood next to the door to his cabin, her bit of fish in hand, and said softly, “Algernon! Oi, Algernon! You beautiful thing, I brought you something.”

She heard a gentle thud through the door, and then nothing.

“Come here,” she said, a bit louder. “I’ve got a bit of fish here for you because you’re such a magnificent, gorgeous cat who has a lunatic of an owner.”

The door swung open, and Lily jumped back to avoid it smacking into her face. She wasn’t quick enough, though, and it whacked her foot. She cursed and hopped onto her other foot, but still had enough sense to grab the door handle before it shut again.

“Come on,” she told Algernon, and limped into James’s cabin.

Algernon followed, golden eyes fixed on her hand.

The door snicked shut behind them, and Lily lowered herself into a chair at James’s table, the horizon behind her as dark as irises.

“Here you go,” she said, holding out her palm to Algernon. “Because you’re such a good cat.”

He darted forward and licked the fish off her hand, rough tongue brushing against her skin, and then retreated, eyeing Lily cautiously.

“I’m not going to get into any trouble,” she told him. “And I’m definitely not going to hurt James, so calm down, all right?”

She checked the drawers under the reading alcove and found nothing but clothes and spellbooks. Tempted though she was to borrow the one on potions, she left them alone. Instead she rummaged through his desk drawers, hurriedly opening them and pressing her hand against the bottoms to test for false panels.

Algernon had hopped up onto the reading nook and curled up in a ball, tail flicking while he watched Lily poke around the room.

She found her effects in one of the drawers under James’s bed, lying next to a small mirror and a curious golden ball with tiny, delicate wings. She traded out her hairpin for one she’d borrowed from Marlene and opened her pouch. As best she could tell they hadn’t figured out how to find the true contents, although interestingly all of her coins were still in the Muggle side.

She picked up the dagger her friend Miguel had given her during her brief stint as a pirate, but her hand stilled before she took it out of the pouch. If someone caught her with a weapon, they’d be suspicious of her motives, and of how she’d managed to sneak it past them. She reluctantly nestled it back in her pouch beside the necklace her parents had given her on her tenth birthday, and allowed herself a brief caress of the pendant before removing her candle.

There was nowhere safe to stow her candle. If any of the crew mistook it for a regular candle, they could burn through it without even realizing its powers. But if she was going to search the ship for information without the crew knowing, and if she was going to try to escape at some point, she’d need the candle. She tucked it into her bodice along with a box of matches, and converted the bag back to the Muggle side.

She dropped her pouch back in the drawer and stood up, closing the drawer with her foot.

“Algernon,” she called sweetly. “Would you mind escorting me back into the library?”

Algernon looked at her sourly.

“Come on,” she pleaded. “I don’t want to break the spells.”

But he remained unconvinced.

“Please? Look, I only took back what was rightfully mine. And you saw, it’s nothing dangerous. A candle and a hairpin, honestly. I’m not going to take over the world with that.”

He slowly stood up in his spot, and Lily beamed.

“Yes, see?” she added. “I’m really not intending anything awful. I just wanted my own things back.”

Algernon leapt off the bench and trotted over to her.

“I’ll steal you some bacon at breakfast,” she said, in a sing-song voice.

He purred, happier than she’d heard him yet, and sprang over to the door.

It opened at his presence, of course, and Lily smiled at him. James might not have come around to her, but she’d manage without him.

And if his cat liked her better than him, well, that was just a bonus.


	4. You Know Who

Every four hours marked a shift change on board, and the crew rotated between working, sleeping, and leisure time, with meals slotted in where possible. The closest Lily came to seeing the whole crew at once was at breakfast and lunch, where everyone save James and whoever was sleeping at the time sat down in the common room together.

“Excellent breakfast,” Marlene told Caradoc through a mouthful of bread.

Caradoc smiled. “Thank you.”

“McKinnon, you left your book in the crow’s nest,” Sirius said, as though this were of no significance.

Dorcas’s gaze snapped up from her plate to Marlene. “You had a _book_ in the crow’s nest?”

Marlene’s eyes briefly narrowed at Sirius before looking down at her plate. “It’s so _boring_ up there. What am I supposed to do?”

“Keep _watch_.”

“I saw nothing – isn’t that what really matters?”

“No.”

“Well, sorry.”

Peter ducked his head, leaning halfway over his plate, while a line formed in Caradoc’s forehead and Lily watched silently. Perhaps Dorcas was being a bit harsh about it, but reading in the crow’s nest did seem to defeat the purpose of being up there.

Fortunately Dorcas didn’t reach for her wand, instead attacking her food.

The line vanished from Caradoc’s face, and Peter sat up again.

“If you’re going to break the rules,” Sirius said, pointing at Marlene with his fork, “at least read something more interesting than _Amortension_.”

“I _like_ that book,” Marlene said hotly. “Just because I want to read something fun and not the most depressing literature in existence doesn’t mean—”

“My books aren’t _depressing_ , they’re _deep_ —”

Dorcas pounded a fist on the table. “No one cares about your stupid books,” she said with an air of finality. “So long as it’s not in the crow’s nest.”

Marlene and Sirius glared at each other and went back to their breakfast.

“I liked _Amortension_ ,” Caradoc said. “I found it very engaging.”

Sirius looked at Caradoc, his eyebrows drawing together. He opened his mouth, closed it, and then burst out laughing.

“Oh, it’s fine for _Caradoc_ to read it,” Marlene muttered into her teacup. “That’s _funny_ , but if _I_ like the characters….”

“And you.” Dorcas turned to Peter. “Are you making progress?”

He hunched over his food again. “Er, some.”

“How much?”

“Er, I can’t really measure it….”

Dorcas gave him a firm look of disapproval.

“I’m trying,” Peter pleaded.

Lily opened her mouth to tell Dorcas to back off—she had no clue what they were talking about, but Peter looked ready to curl up in a ball—but Dorcas pointedly turned back to her food.

“Try harder,” she said.

“Which character did you like best in _Amortension_?” Caradoc asked Marlene.

“The main character, obviously,” she said. “You’ve got to respect a woman who can brew _Amortentia_ from memory using that many substitutions.”

“She is a talented poitioneer….”

Lily stopped listening to their book discussion and looked around the table instead. Peter morosely ate his eggs while Sirius cheerfully buttered another slice of bread. Dorcas whispered something in his ear, and he laughed.

After Dorcas had leaned away from him, he glanced around the table, and his eyes found Lily’s.

Few people could look as handsome as he did while smiling, much less with a disdainful curl of the lip, but somehow he pulled it off.

Lily stretched her mouth into a huge smile, just to annoy him. He let his eyes roll around in contempt and went back to his food.

“Sirius,” Dorcas snapped, “check the riggings and sails.”

“Pray tell,” Sirius said, “what have I done to deserve such a scornful tone?”

Her thin mouth hinted at a smile. “You’re a snitch.”

“Ah, but only for the right cause.”

She forced the smile off her face and turned to Marlene. “Inspect the orlop deck.”

“Aye aye.” Marlene beamed inexplicably.

During her brief stint as a real pirate, Lily had always traded shifts with other people to avoid crawling around in the narrow bottom of the ship.

But she understood better later when she followed Marlene down below the gun deck. They descended into darkness, like climbing into a well. When Marlene reached the bottom of the ladder, she cast a spell to light a candle on the wall near her, setting off a chain reaction. Several feet down another candle lit up, and then another, forming a shining row of advancing light down the wall. The reaction didn’t stop until the lights had come full circle around the room.

They’d spelled the deck in a way Lily had only ever heard about, where the room had more space than it properly should have. The deck spanned more than the entire length of the ship, all one sprawling room, except for one metal wall with a door at the far end. In between the door and Lily stood row after row of shelving, packed tight with labeled boxes, jars, and bottles, all eerily lit by the candles.

Lily’s stomach flipped. With all these materials, she might be trapped on board for months before they needed to take port somewhere.

“Follow me around if you like.” Marlene unpinned a piece of parchment from the wall. “It’s probably best if you don’t touch anything, though.”

Lily sighed and nodded. It was still better than sitting around and doing nothing.

“Not that _I_ think you’re here to mess everything up,” Marlene hastened to add. “But just, you know, if something goes wrong, let’s make sure you look plenty innocent, all right?”

“I’ll _be_ innocent, which should be the most important thing.”

“And it will be, but—well, Dorcas.”

“And Sirius.”

“And Peter,” Marlene said sourly.

“But you’re still in the majority, so that counts for something, right?”

“Less than you might think. But I really don’t think they’ll kill you without a trial or something first.”

“Oh, thanks. I’ll just go start chatting with Dorcas now – obviously I’ve nothing to be afraid of. You’re an immense comfort in my time of distress.”

“I do what I can.” Marlene looked at the list and began slowly walking down one of the aisles, eyes scanning up and down the shelves.

“What are you supposed to do down here, anyway?”

“Oh, make sure everything’s in order. Refresh some spells. Nothing exciting.”

Most of the supplies looked to be food and drink, but as Lily followed Marlene down a few rows, the names on the labels became unfamiliar.

“Is the pepper in Pepper Up literal or metaphorical?” Lily asked.

Marlene finished casting a spell on a sack labeled _Flour_. “Both, really. There’s capsicum in there, and the potion makes you feel better.”

“Not as aptly titled as that Blood-Replenishing potion, is it?” Lily’s gaze dropped to Marlene’s wand. “Do you mostly attack other witches and wizards? I imagine you’d need different treatments for spell damage than Muggle battle wounds.”

Marlene looked up from the jar she was inspecting. “Sorry?”

“I mean, when you raid ships, you must get spell injuries, not stabbed. That or everyone just surrenders when you show up.”

But that didn’t make much sense either. Lily had never heard of them before seeing the wanted poster of James, which meant they might be a newer crew. An unusually successful new crew, or one with strong financial backing. The latter seemed less plausible, though, because people with financial patrons didn’t typically become pirates.

“Are you a new crew?” Lily asked. “You seem to know each other well enough, but I haven’t heard much about you from other pirates.”

Marlene traced the tip of her wand over the cracked jar, the glass neatly repairing itself behind it. “Yeah, that’s us. Not famous at all, really.”

She continued working her way down the rows, casting spells and checking things over as needed. A few rows in Lily squinted at a jar that seemed to hold animal hearts. Her hand reached out to grab it and bring it closer for inspection, but Marlene shot her a warning look.

“Why hasn’t James kicked Dorcas off the crew?” Lily asked, reluctantly pulling her hand back. “She’s awfully rude to most of you.”

Marlene shrugged. “She knows the ship best, besides him, and she and James have worked together for a while.”

“They don’t seem that close.”

“Maybe it’s better to say they understand each other. She knows what the ship needs.”

“I suppose they must be close, if James chose her as first mate.”

“What? No, Remus is first mate. Dorcas is just the boatswain – she only gets to tell people what to do about the ship, and nothing more. Don’t let her bother you.”

“I’m not supposed to be bothered that she wants to kill me?”

“Oh, she doesn't mean it.”

“It’s funny,” Lily said, arms folding over her chest, “because the words _kill her_ are usually very difficult to confuse for any other words.”

Marlene took a few steps down the row, and Lily followed, noticing that Marlene had missed a crack in a jar labeled _Beetle eyes_.

“There’s a break in the glass just there,” Lily said.

Marlene stepped backwards and kneeled down to see the jar in question. With a small jet of forest green light, the crack disappeared. “Cheers,” she said, and moved forward again. “I wouldn’t worry about Dorcas. She just says things like that.”

“What, I’m supposed to believe she’s all bark and no bite?”

“Oh, no, she bites.” Marlene laughed. “She bit me once in third year over a biscuit. But she also has a lot of bark. Disproportionate bark. Harmless bark. She’s practically a tree.”

“A tree that wants to fall over on me,” Lily muttered. “Crush me with its branches.”

“ _Maim_ you with its branches, maybe.”

“Such cruelty from you. Maybe I’ll go bother Caradoc. He seems kind enough.”

“Oi, I’m plenty kind. If anything, he’s _too_ kind. And he’s not very fun.”

“Not sure there is such a thing as too kind.”

Marlene turned back to Lily and rolled her eyes. “Oh, I know he hated the main character in _Amortension_. He’d never like her because she tricked that bloke into drinking Amortentia, but Caradoc would never say what he thought if he thought I didn’t want to hear it.”

The way they spoke about each other, and given their close ages…. They must have all gone to Hogwarts together. Then they must have all decided to become pirates together after _Before_ , whatever that was…. It seemed awfully strange.

Lily didn’t really _need_ to know what all this _Before_ business was, not to get off the ship, but many more things would probably become clearer if she only knew what it was.

Marlene wouldn’t tell her, though, which left Lily with very few options.

Two, in fact, and she already knew which one she was more interested in pursuing.

\--

But when she tried to approach Remus after lunch, he was caught up talking to Peter, and Sirius’s glare put her off hanging around to wait. Instead she wandered up the staircase to the forecastle deck, braiding her hair as she walked. While their orlop deck was pleasant enough to walk around, it still suffered from the musty, stale air that plagued all storage rooms. Besides, the clouds were in stunning form that afternoon, towering high above the sails.

She heard the door to the common room open and shut, and James’s and Sirius’s voices drifted up toward her. She moved further toward the front, just far enough to stay out of their view, but close enough to hear them.

“The rigging looks fine to me,” Sirius said. “Dunno what Meadowes was on about.”

“No, see? Right there, below the top of the sail. That knot’s coming undone.”

“Is it? Then you fix it, _Captain_ Potter.”

“I know _I_ can do it. _You’re_ the one with the knot problem.”

“I do not have a _knot_ problem. That sounds ridiculous anyway. Knot problem, honestly.”

“Then prove me wrong and fix it.”

“I’ll do it because I’m supposed to, not because I have to prove anything to you.”

“I really don’t care why you do it so long as you do it. Preferably before it comes undone entirely.”

Lily heard Sirius muttering but couldn’t make out what he was saying. Then he called out a spell, and a flash of blue light streaked up toward the sail.

“That’s not _quite_ right,” James said. “It’s more of a—”

“Bollocks.”

“I beg to differ, and as I am Captain Potter….”

“Don’t pull rank on me.”

“If anything I’m pulling experience. I’m perfectly entitled to pull that.”

“This is how Dorcas showed me how to do it this morning before she went to bed.”

“Then she showed you wrong.”

“Be happy she’s sleeping or you’d have bat bogeys to deal with.”

“She comes to me when there are ship problems. Why don’t you trust me like she does?”

Neither of them spoke for a moment, the silence a violin string pulled too tight.

“I’m only bothering you because I can,” Sirius said, by way of apology.

James sighed. “I know.”

“But can you get that bit—”

“Over there, yeah, I see.”

“Only because of your specs.”

“I’m happy enough to take away some of your eyesight. So you can share in the experience, you know. As my best mate, you should understand me perfectly, and I don’t think you can until you’ve seen through my eyes.”

“You and your _experience_. I know perfectly how much experience you’ve had.”

“Oi, not when there’s a lady on board.”

“Who— _Lily_?”

“Well, all right, not a _lady_ , but there is a woman on board who doesn’t know us like Marlene and Dorcas.”

Lily smiled to herself. Technically she was a lady, after all, but James didn’t know it.

“She’ll be gone soon enough,” Sirius said. “I’m not worried.”

“Don’t tell me you’re starting to come around to her.”

“No, I just think Dorcas will kill her.”

“You slay me with your wit.”

“Not as much as Dorcas will slay her.”

“You know, I really don’t think that’s a funny joke to be making.”

“Come off it, it’s nothing.”

“I don’t think Lily likes hearing that Dorcas is going to kill her.”

Lily stood up a little straighter.

“Obviously Dorcas won’t kill her,” Sirius said. “Unless Lily really is a saboteur, in which case I think we all agree that would be the best course.”

“If she is a saboteur, I don’t think we’re exactly endearing her to us, making threats like that.”

“If she’s a saboteur then she should be afraid for her life,” Sirius said darkly.

“But, I mean, even if she is, that’s not the only possible outcome.”

“What other option is there? Maroon on an island?”

“No, I mean,” James said, sounding a bit frustrated. “She seems clever.”

“And?”

“And we need clever.”

“You’re not trying to get her to _join_ us, are you?”

“No, I’m—that’s not at all—I don’t even know she is a saboteur, all right? She could be, yeah, but—well, you know. But if we found out she _was_ a saboteur, we wouldn’t have to kill her.”

“We’ll have to disagree on that, then.”

James’s tone turned harsh. “If you find evidence that she’s a saboteur, you are _not_ allowed to kill her. Or let Dorcas kill her. Or anyone else.”

“Oh, shove off, James.”

“I mean it. You bring her to me with the evidence and I’ll hear you out. But no more joking about killing her, and no _actually_ killing her unless I give word.”

“I thought you weren’t pulling rank.”

“Yeah, well,” James said bitterly, “on this I am.”

“You’re no fun anymore.”

“I’m not going to apologize for taking things seriously.”

There was another tense silence from them, and Lily strained her ears, trying to hear them over the wind and the flapping sails.

Finally Sirius said, “I missed having you around.”

“You’re an idiot. We’re finally working together, aren’t we?”

“Yeah,” Sirius said in a low, rough voice.

“I know you’re not much of a sailor, but it’s not forever.”

“Not for me, anyway.”

“Only ‘cos you’re the lucky one of us.”

“Oh, I dunno about that,” Sirius said. “Luck’s never really been on my side.”

“Except the day you met me, of course.”

“Naturally. But it’s all been downhill from there, honestly.”

“Oh, naturally….”

Lily heard them moving, and she stepped lightly up to the very front railing, far enough away that she couldn’t hear them. If they saw her, they might not suspect her of listening in on them.

At least her death seemed less imminent now. Most of the crew didn’t think Dorcas would actually kill her, even if she really did want to, and the captain certainly seemed against it. Then again, they were pirates – the captain’s word only went as far as the crew’s trust in him.

Lily leaned her elbows on the pristine railing, the horizon lay stretching out in front of her.

She’d been lucky, up until now, not to get caught stealing. She’d been luckier yet that she’d been caught by relatively lenient pirates. But perhaps it was time for a change.

The most obvious choice was to switch to land-based thievery. If nothing else, she’d never have to suffer imprisonment again. She could escape much more easily from a jail than from a ship, should she ever get caught again.

For the first time in a long time, she briefly considered going back to England permanently, maybe finding Petunia. A comfortable life was still possible for her, after all. She wasn’t too old to find a lord of a husband, and certainly not too old for children.

But she couldn’t really go back to Petunia, or to that life.

They’d fought before Lily had left. Petunia had been on the verge of marriage the winter that their parents had died, and she’d told Lily without hesitation she and Vernon would take guardianship over her. The idea had sounded awful, and Lily hadn’t stuck around to try it out.

Lily hadn’t been sixteen for a month at that point, and she’d been in a snit since Christmas, when for the first time Severus hadn’t come home from Hogwarts. His mum had refused to answer Lily’s knocks and Sev hadn’t sent a letter. He’d promised he’d teach her how to start a fire that Christmas, and instead Lily had received a stupid new dress for Christmas from her father and the supposedly happy news that she would go with her father to London for the season that year.

She’d been so awful to her parents in the weeks before their death, devastated over Sev’s mysterious absence and resentful about the way her life was heading, and then she’d lost them in an instant.

Lily heard footsteps behind her and turned, expecting to see James.

But it was Remus who joined her at the rail. He basked in the glory of the wind for a moment before turning toward her. “Fancy another round of chess?”

Lily smiled. “Absolutely.”

\--

“What happened before?” Lily asked.

Remus sat hunched over, eyes on the board. “Before what?”

“ _Before_.” She moved a pawn for him to take. “Marlene and James keep talking about this thing that happened, about two years ago I think. They haven’t said what it is, but it’s something big that I missed, and I want to know why it’s so _telling_ and _important_ that I don’t know what it is.”

“Ah, that.” He flicked his eyes up toward her and then brought them back to the game.

But he didn’t immediately elaborate, prompting Lily to ask, “So, what is it?”

“Well, the thing is, I’m not entirely sure I’m the best person to explain.”

“Marlene refused, too.”

He smiled fondly to himself. “That would be her approach.”

“Well, would you rather I ask Dorcas instead and get my throat slit?”

“She doesn’t go for the throat,” he said absently.

“Oh, lovely. I’ll look forward to her stabbing me in the heart, then.”

He sat up straight, stretching his shoulders back, and finally looked up at Lily properly. “I’m intrigued that you ask.”

“Because either I’m a saboteur or not, yes, _I know_. Except I’m not a saboteur—I don’t even know what it is that I’m supposed to be sabotaging—and instead I’m just very confused.”

“I suppose even if you are a saboteur, there’s no harm in telling you. You would already know.”

“Yes, marvelous. Now, please, clue me into this mystery that apparently shouldn’t be such a mystery.”

“Well,” he said thoughtfully. “How to put this. I suppose the short version is that while we were at Hogwarts, there was this Dark wizard, nasty bloke, who had been gathering followers for some time. And then, one day, he got what he wanted: he and his followers took over the Ministry by force.”

“That’s the You Know Who I keep hearing about?”

“That’s one of the names he goes by, yes.”

“If he’s in charge, why does he go by such a bloody stupid name?”

“He’s cast a Taboo on it. If you say his name, even in your own home miles away from any of his supporters, he knows. Granted, we’re nowhere near England, and it might not extend this far, but we wouldn’t want to risk it.”

Lily cocked her head. “You don’t want What’s His Face to find you.”

He smiled sadly. “I see why James didn’t tell you all this immediately. Suffice it to say that no, we don’t want him to find us.”

“You’re not going to tell me why, are you,” she said flatly.

“No, I’m afraid not.”

“Because you still think I’m a saboteur.”

“It’s a possibility, isn’t it? Surely you can see our reasoning.”

“Not really, since I’ve no idea why you would think I would care what a bunch of pirates are up to off the coast of France. Or why What’s His Face would, if that’s who you think I’m working for.”

“I suppose if you aren’t a saboteur, this must be terribly confusing.”

“Oh, I assure you. It is.”

Remus offered her a sympathetic look.

“But all right,” she said, “so someone took over the government. That happens all the time. Did a lot of people die or something?”

“It’s less to do with the actual coup, which could have been worse, honestly, in terms of death toll. Although I assure you, plenty of people were killed on both sides. No, it’s more…. Some people take issue with his agenda, which includes the expulsion or extinction of Muggle-born witches and wizards.”

She scrunched up her nose. “What?”

“He believes they’re inferior to other wizards, particularly pure-bloods, and he thinks Muggle-borns stole their magic from other witches and wizards and deserve to die.”

“And this bloke’s running the government?”

“To our chagrin.”

Lily glanced around the room, pausing to look out the window, when suddenly Sev’s warning made perfect sense. Of course she couldn’t reveal her Muggle-born status to wizards, not if it might get her killed.

“This—this What’s His Face,” she said, leaning forward, elbows on her knees. “He wants to round up the Muggle-borns? And just—just _kill_ them? For nothing?”

“Yes.”

“That’s so—that’s just—”

“Mad.”

“Yes!”

His mouth curved into a slight smile, as if he were a professor and she’d got an answer right. “If you are a saboteur, I give you full points for a convincing portrayal.”

Lily ignored him. “But really, that’s what I’ve been missing the last two years?”

“Apparently so.”

“Well, that’s just….” She made a frustrated noise. A readymade rant bounced around in her head about how unfair it all was because she’d never stolen her magic from anyone, but she swallowed it. She couldn’t tell any of that to Remus because she hadn’t revealed that she was Muggle-born. For all she knew, they were secretly working for this Dark bloke and would hand her over whenever they returned to England.

Remus smiled at her in apology. “It’s upsetting, I know.”

“Upsetting is maybe a fifth of what I’m currently feeling.”

“So it seems.”

If she’d been told ten minutes ago that she couldn’t safely return to England possibly ever, she might have been mildly upset.

But to hear that she couldn’t go home because someone wanted to kill her for no good reason….

She’d never officially been a part of the wizarding world, but the idea that she couldn’t join now tore at her, a restless wound in her stomach.

She’d been denied plenty of things in life already for being female, and now a group of people hated her for something else she’d had no control over, hated her enough to want to potentially _kill_ her. And she’d done _nothing_ to deserve it.

She hadn’t spent much time in England during the past two and a half years—she’d been dying to get out and see the world her mother had always told her about—but now she couldn’t go back. Not without fearing for her life. Even if she tried to hide her magic, as she’d always done, accidental magic happened. And, as she had learned, she could reveal herself as a witch without even realizing it.

She’d been so desperate to flee, and now that she knew she couldn’t go home, images of the rolling hills along her parents’ estate haunted her, a comfort now out of reach.

“You took that news very hard,” Remus observed.

“Yes, well,” Lily said, forcing her fists to unclench, “it’s difficult to hear that there’s been a governmental overthrow, as it turns out, and that the new regime is so absurdly awful.”

“We couldn’t believe it ourselves, at first. We were at Hogwarts, and the Headmaster told us, and we didn’t—we didn’t think he was joking, but it seemed impossible.”

Lily nodded to herself. No wonder Sev had been worried about her that last summer. It didn’t explain where he’d gone, but that had to be the reason he’d never come home.

He’d had a good reason for not coming back.

She’d been furious with him, certain he’d tired of trying to teach a Muggle-born magic, and he’d simply been hiding after a coup.

How utterly selfish and myopic of her. How foolish that she’d spent her parents’ last weeks with her nose upturned because Severus had had to deal with his government being overthrown.

It was all such a waste.

“Are you quite all right?” Remus asked.

“No,” she said, her voice strange and unfamiliar.

“Is there anything I can do?”

Questions about Severus, and Hogwarts, and how on earth anyone stupid enough to call himself You Know Who could possibly take over the government, and with such an asinine agenda to boot, all sprung to mind.

But really only one question mattered, in the grand scheme of things.

“Tell me someone’s trying to take back the government,” she said. “Tell me people aren’t letting that arse stay in power.”

He watched her curiously for a moment, the corners of his mouth twitching up in a resigned smile. “Where tyranny leads, resistance follows.”

“Good,” Lily said fiercely. “Good.”

Remus and the others might have been working for What’s His Face, but the way they spoke of him made it seem unlikely. Not to mention they had little cause for misleading her, as far as she knew, and Remus had already admitted to having a Muggle mother.

Of course, she only didn’t trust them because of Sev, and Sev was only concerned about What’s His Face finding Lily. And in turn, James’s crew didn’t trust Lily because of What’s His Face.

Really, this whole situation was his fault.

She scowled.

Stupid What’s His Face.


	5. Firing Shots

Lily showed up to James’s cabin again that evening in another one of Marlene’s dresses and knocked once.

James opened the door immediately, a warm smile on his face. “Welcome,” he said. Algernon meowed loudly from somewhere in the room. “He says hello, too.”

Lily stepped into his room and spotted Algernon stretching next to James’s bed. “I might not speak cat, but I did rather guess at that one.”

“Please, sit and enjoy the fruits of Caradoc’s labors.”

“You were very lucky to get him for your crew.”

They took their seats, and Lily’s mouth watered at the smell of roast potatoes. Caradoc should have been doing this work somewhere proper, like a nice household, not for pirates.

“He’s an old mate,” James said. “And he—well, he had his reasons.”

Algernon stopped by Lily for a moment to receive a brief pat on the head, then sat down by James, his tail swishing across the wooden floor.

“Are you adapting to the ship all right?” James asked.

Lily poured the wine. “There’s not much to adapt to,” she said, handing him his cup. “You’ve a fairly typical ship, except for the magic.”

“Spent a lot of time on ships, then?” He raised his wine at her in thanks.

“Oh, not usually more than a night or two at a time.”

“Are you—have you spent longer than that, at all?”

“Why do you ask?”

“No reason.”

Lily’s eyes narrowed. “Is this an interrogation?”

“No, not—I’m just asking. I’m not much of an interrogator.”

“Yes. I noticed.”

He sighed. “So if you could just _tell_ me everything I want to know, that would save us both a lot of effort.”

She did have to tell him _something_ , or he’d never let her go.

But if it had to happen, at least it could happen on her terms.

Her mouth pulled back in a coy smile. “I’ve a proposal for you.”

“A proposal? I love a good proposal. Don’t get enough of them, really. No one proposes anything anymore.”

“It’s simple, really: I’ll trade you answers.”

He mulled over this, one hand reaching down to scratch Algernon’s ears. “I can’t give you much on what we’re doing or where we’re going.”

“I know, but if I have to tell you who I am, I think it should be a fair trade.”

“And why are you so curious about me? Am I that fascinating to you? That irresistible?”

“Fascinating in the way one studies an interesting species of insect, perhaps. I just want you to know how it feels.”

“I suppose, in the tradition of parley, a fair trade would be acceptable.”

Lily served herself some potatoes. “In that case, would you like to begin by telling me who you are? Considering last night was all about me, of course.”

“You’ve got me there,” he mused. “Well. I’m James Potter. My parents raised me in Devon. I went to Hogwarts when I was eleven—Gryffindor, of course—and stayed there until Sixth Year.”

“When What’s His Face took over,” Lily filled in. “Remus told me.”

“He mentioned as much,” James said, a bit sternly.

“What, did you not want him to tell me?”

“No, it’s not—” He sighed. “It’s not like this is some huge secret, that You Know Who’s running the Ministry. I’m just—nothing. It’s fine. So now you know.”

“Yes,” she said bitterly. “I know.”

“You don’t sound pleased about what you learned.”

“Of course I’m not bloody _pleased_. Remus didn’t give me loads of details, but it’s enough that yeah, I’m less than perfectly thrilled to hear What’s His Face is in charge.”

James raised his cup. “I’ll drink to that.”

“I should hope you’d do more than drink,” she muttered, and took a large swig of wine.

His face contorted as he nearly choked on his wine. He swallowed, cleared his throat, and let out a loud, barking laugh. “I’m sorry, I must have misheard. I thought I just heard the chirping of an enormous hypocrite.”

“I’m nowhere near hypocrisy. _I’m_ not the one gallivanting around, pirating and drinking and God knows what else.”

“What’ve you been doing with your life, eh? You’re not exactly the picture of nobility and chivalry.”

Lily’s wine sloshed around the edges of her cup as she set it down, perhaps with more force than was strictly necessary. “Chivalry? _I_ didn’t know this What’s His Face business was going on at all. _You_ abandoned your people when they needed you.”

“Oh, and I expect that now that you know, you’re going to catch the first ship back to England and go hunt him down yourself, is that it?”

“Why would I, that’s not even—” She’d been planning to say _my world_ , but that would reveal her Muggle-born status. She focused on her plate. “That’s not fair. I’m not tied to England anymore.”

“But it’s your home, isn’t it? The wizarding world is in a mess, yeah, but it’s not like you’re planning to do anything about it.”

“Even if I felt the need to do something, what would I do?”

“You’ve got an easy out, you know.” He leaned forward in his seat. “Why won’t you just _admit_ you’re Muggle-born? I really don’t care if you are, and I don’t get why you think you need to hide it. You can’t be afraid because of _him_ , if you’ve just learned about him, so are you ashamed, or what?”

Shame had nothing to do with it – Sev had explained the terminology, but never implied she was anything less than him or anyone else.

“What would you do if I were Muggle-born, anyway?” she said. “I still just learned what was going on so I still have an out.”

“I wouldn’t _do_ anything if you were Muggle-born. It would just explain a lot of things, and since we were supposed to be trying to get to know one another….”

He hadn’t left her much choice. He could keep her as long as he wanted, since he had a wand and six crew members to back him up, and Lily had her wits, a candle, and a hairpin to her name.

He needed this to trust her. It was asinine, but that didn’t make it any less true.

Besides, they didn’t act like they cared if she was Muggle-born, or at least they didn’t judge her for it. He cared because—because that was who she was, on some level. It did mean something, apparently. It just didn’t mean everything.

“Fine,” she bit out. “Yes, I am Muggle-born.”

She was afraid he’d be smug in his victory, but instead his shoulders relaxed, and he sat back in his chair.

“Thank you,” he said. “Now, that wasn’t hard, was it?”

Lily shoved a forkful of steak into her mouth to avoid answering.

“Why were you so afraid to tell me?” he asked. “If you didn’t know about What’s His Face.”

She swallowed and looked down at Algernon, who’d curled up in a ball at James’s feet. “Someone told me it wouldn’t be wise to reveal it.”

“Someone like….”

“It’s—complicated. My friend told me. He’s the only wizard I’ve ever known, really, only he went to Hogwarts and I didn’t.”

James fixed her with a skeptical look. “He told you to hide being Muggle-born but not what’s been going on?”

“He sent me a letter Before, so he must have thought it could happen, but maybe hoped it wouldn’t…. He never came home that Christmas, and I don’t know….”

“Oh. Right.” James’s expression softened. “What’s your friend’s name? I might know him. I might be able to—well.”

James looked to be about their age, but Severus had been in Slytherin, and from the little he’d said about it, he hadn’t seemed to care for Gryffindors.

She pressed her lips together. “His name’s Severus Snape.”

She’d expected a vaguely familiar nod, or perhaps a blank stare, but certainly not the shadow that crossed James’s face.

“Snape.” James looked as though he were on the verge of sicking up. “You’re friends with _Severus_ _Snape_?”

“ _Yes_. Or I was, until he stopped coming home. I don’t even know if he’s alive, all right?”

“Oh,” James said darkly, “he’s alive.”

He was _alive._

It felt like a small elephant had moved off of her chest, and she could breathe properly again. “Do you know where he is, then?”

If he were alive, she could find him. He might be able to protect her, or maybe help her finally get a wand. And she could apologize for thinking poorly of him, even if he hadn’t known she’d done so.

James’s eyes narrowed. “How did you two meet?”

“We grew up in the same town.” Which was technically true, even if she’d grown up on an estate and Sev had lived in the village. “He’s the person who told me I was a witch.”

“But you’re a Muggle-born.”

“And he’s a half-blood,” Lily said, as though it were obvious. “He never cared that I was Muggle-born.”

“He’s not….” James paused and gave his plate of cooling food a contemplative look. “Oh, Snape,” he said, so quietly Lily nearly didn’t hear him.

“Do you know where I can find him?”

“I know exactly where you can find him.” He looked up at her over his glasses, head still ducked. “He’s sitting at his desk at the Ministry of Magic.”

“You think he—you’re saying he works for What’s His Face? What, as a spy or something?”

“Oh, no. He’s always been evil, as far as I know. Rotten to the core, and when You Know Who came knocking, Snape and his friends all answered. Might as well have invited him in and served him tea.”

She lifted her chin. “Well, obviously we can’t be talking about the same person.”

James let out a low laugh and ripped off a piece of bread from the loaf. “Severus Snape, a lanky sort of bloke with a big nose and disgusting hair? I’d never confuse him for anyone else. Trust me. I’m plenty familiar with him.”

“He must be working there against What’s His Face, then.”

“Oh, Lily, you don’t even know him, do you?” he said, in an awful, mocking voice. “He’s Dark, that one. He knew more Dark spells as a first-year than all of Gryffindor combined. Or did he never show you those books?”

“He taught me loads of nice, useful spells.”

“I wouldn’t expect him to teach them to you. Harmless Muggle-born like you—he didn’t want to scare you off.”

Lily could feel her heart trying to leap out of her chest. Sev would never do something so monumentally stupid as to work for a man who wanted to kill her.

“Stop talking about him like that,” she said sharply.

“What, like he is?”

“Severus is a good person. I’ve known him for years.”

“I knew him for six years. Six years of watching him go deeper and deeper into the Dark.”

Lily’s lips pressed together, and she found she was shaking her head. “He wouldn’t work for What’s His Face and actually think he was in the right.”

He snorted. “Well, he is. Ask any of my crew. We all knew him. I personally crossed wands with him plenty of times at Hogwarts.”

James was either mistaken, or lying, but Lily couldn’t figure out how he could be so completely misguided.

“Sev has _always_ been a good friend to me.”

“Oh, right, of course. He’s such a good friend, he completely forgot to tell you about You Know Who?”

“Because it hadn’t happened yet, obviously. He sent a letter the autumn before, warning me not to tell anyone I was a Muggle-born witch, and then he never came home for Christmas, and then—then I left home.”

“Right after the takeover? Care to explain that?”

She primly placed her silverware on her plate, her appetite lost. “I’m sure it’s none of your business.”

“And here I thought we’d be trading answers.”

“Obviously I was mistaken if I thought you’d tell me the truth.”

His eyebrows rose, disappearing into the locks of hair hanging over his forehead. “You think I’m lying about Snape?”

“Maybe you’re lying, or maybe you don’t know what you’re on about.”

James set down his utensils and tapped the fingers of one hand on the table. He kept watching her, and Lily avoided his gaze by looking at her plate.

Finally, he said, “You’ve been spending a fair amount of time with Marlene and Remus, right? You trust them more than me?”

“To an extent,” she said cautiously.

“Then ask them, if you prefer to hear it from another source. Ask Marlene what happened to Mary MacDonald, or ask Remus what Snape thinks of his condition.”

“Fine. Maybe I will.”

“I hope you do.” His cruelty hadn’t returned, but an intensity she hadn’t heard from him before reared up in its stead. “Because if you see Snape again, ever, I’m not sure he won’t turn you right over to the authorities.”

“That doesn’t—why would he warn me to stay hidden and then turn me over?”

“Why wouldn’t he tell you he fights for the Dark? He’s not exactly a forthcoming sort of person, is he?”

She’d always had to pry Sev to get him to tell her details about Hogwarts. He only ever talked about classes, though, and the castle. Never his friends, or the enemies she hadn’t even known he’d had.

“He did enough, didn’t he?” she said. “I haven’t told anyone but you I’m Muggle-born, and What’s His Face hasn’t found me.”

She shot him a triumphant look, but he didn’t appear to see it, lost in his own thoughts.

“You know,” he said, “you need to have a backstory about your heritage ready. If you’re ever going back to England, I mean. You definitely can’t tell anyone there about being Muggle-born.”

“I suppose I will need some cover,” Lily allowed. “But I don’t know when I’ll be back there next. I’ve plenty of time to come up with something.”

“Use the Potter name if you need to. I’ll back you up as an illegitimate sister or something.”

“Thanks?”

“And if you do go back—be careful, all right? You Know Who and his Death Eaters are ruthless.”

“Death Eaters?” She snorted. “Is that really what he calls them? He’s a real penchant for naming things, doesn’t he.”

“Finally,” James said, almost smiling, “something we can agree on.”

\--

James might pretend to be mad, might pretend to be kind to her, but hearing him judge Severus, or her for trusting him…. She hadn’t seen the pirate side of him before, but it was clearly there, just well masked.

He’d regret it later when she grabbed whatever he was after out of his clutches. She only needed to figure out what Peter was working on. If they were willing to forgo raids, there wasn’t much left they could be chasing except something truly valuable.

If she could find out what they were after, and more importantly where it was, she could sell the information once she was free. Assuming she got off the ship sometime before they found what they were after, of course.

In the early morning hours, while most of the crew slept, Lily lit her candle and snuck up to the main deck, where thick, dark clouds hung suspended overhead, threatening a storm. Dorcas worked on the far side of the main deck, ropes flying around her in a whirlwind. Marlene stood on watch in the crow’s nest, hopefully without a book in hand, and the lone candle in the common room had to belong to Sirius.

Lily crept across the deck and slipped through the library door when Dorcas’s back was turned, and began rifling through the papers along the shelves. She found personal letters, maps of the French coast, and lists of people she didn’t know – nothing that struck her as terribly significant.

Thankfully most of the shelves held books, and while it was possible Peter was hiding his project in one of them, she’d have to come back later and search them strategically. For now she focused on the papers. If Peter was accessing his project every day, multiple times a day, he’d keep it in a convenient but secure location.

Her eyes slid over to the corner of the room, along the wall to James’s cabin, to an ornate wooden cabinet.

Lily quietly strode over, pulling her hairpin out as she walked, and slid it into the empty keyhole. She examined the latch when she opened it and smiled – as best she could tell, it would lock upon closing.

Inside the cabinet she found more stacks of parchment, some folded, others rolled up and bound with twine. She flipped through several documents, all meaningless handwritten scribbles to her, before reaching for a loosely rolled parchment on a lower shelf.

She turned around to spread the parchment out on the table in the center of the room.

The map identified a few small islands in the typical fashion, but someone had drawn shapes all over the map and written short strings of Latin at random intervals.

Most curious of all, if it were being used as a proper navigational map, it should have been in the navigation room. But instead it was in the library, in Peter’s workspace.

She sank into a chair and looked at the handwritten parchments she’d found underneath the map, her eyes flying over the pages. Someone had copied the words and phrases from the map onto the parchment and started translating them into English.

Some of the words resembled spells—single Latin words, like _evanescere_ —while other, longer strings of words seemed like the ramblings of a lunatic. Peter had interpreted the longest string as _sad wind follows a stormy sea._

Lily glanced back and forth between the notes and the map, wondering why the hell Peter would be puzzling over such a strange map, when a slow, heady pleasure washed through her.

There was only one reason pirates would pore over barmy maps. After all, there was only one thing pirates really wanted, in the end.

Treasure.

Particularly the sort of treasure that someone might want to conceal. Particularly the sort of concealed treasure that was buried on an island.

Lily had never seen a real treasure map before. Then again, she’d never spent more than a few months on one ship, and that was just the once.

She started to read over Peter’s notes, absorbing bits of the map’s language and immediately trying to translate them.

Peter had only translated the Latin—and not particularly well, from what she could tell—and tried rearranging the Latin words into anagrams. He hadn’t worked on the shapes at all.

He also hadn’t written anything about the lone English phrase at the bottom of the map, which read, _Where he lay fettered_.

Curious. Very curious.

By itself, the knowledge of the map would be useless. She’d either have to steal the map—difficult—or solve it before Peter did—much more feasible, based on his existing work. If she could find the treasure first, or sell the information on how to get there for a high enough price, she could….well, she’d have options. Better options than she had now.

Lily looked back at the map in earnest. Interestingly, the mapmaker had added shapes made out of smaller shapes: a ring of small squares dominated the western part of the map, a cross of stars stood over the middle, and a triangle of circles dotted the east.

It was almost a pattern, but not quite.

The cross of stars was the odd one out. It should have been a square made of small triangles, if the mapmaker had followed the pattern of the other two. Instead he’d made a starred cross.

She smiled to herself. Her mother had read her _Romeo and Juliet_ when she was twelve, curled up on the sofa in the library, sunlight dazzling through the windows. As best Lily could tell, Peter seemed to be star-crossed with the meaning of the map.

It wasn’t clear that the break in the pattern was important, but it was a start.

\--

Lily hadn’t known how to ask Marlene and Remus about Severus, but it turned out she needn’t have worried. Despite everyone working disjointed schedules, word traveled quickly on board, and she’d barely sat down after breakfast when the crew came to her.

Sirius rested his arms on the back of the sofa where Lily was reading, rain-drenched windows blurring the sea in front of them.

“I find it very suspicious that you’re acquainted with Snivellus.”

Lily kept looking at her book. “I find it very atrocious that you’d call anyone a name like that, given your age.”

“He and I go back, you know.”

“No, I don’t, and I don’t actually care.”

He grabbed the book out of Lily’s hands, one of the pages slicing along her palm in the process. She swore under her breath at the sting and climbed to her feet, glaring at him.

“If you really are Muggle-born,” he said, making it perfectly clear he thought anything but, “you wouldn’t know, but I’m a Black by birth, and the Black family’s nothing but Dark, rotten people.”

“So you fit right in, then.”

“The adults who raised me nearly pissed themselves with glee the moment they found out You Know Who had won.”

“That’s lovely to hear. I like you so much better now.”

Sirius came around the sofa to loom over her. “I want you to understand that I _know_ what Dark wizards are like. I’m plenty familiar with their ilk, and I know what I’m talking about when I tell you that Severus Snape is as Dark as they come.”

“Oh, _yes_ , that’s why he cursed me all those times for being Muggle-born. Thanks for clearing that up.”

He sneered. “He probably wanted to shag you.”

Lily’s hand reached out and slapped his face before she even knew she was going to do it, her cut leaving a thin, bloody streak on his cheek, bright against his fair skin.

“Don’t you _dare_ disrespect my friend that way,” she said, her voice low.

They both froze for a moment, staring at each other. Another sheet of rain thundered against the windows, and Lily’s mind had gone blank, still processing what had just happened.

And then the moment broke, both of them looking away at the same time.

Lily rubbed her sore palm with her other hand while Sirius absently reached one hand up to touch his cheek. He inspected his hand, his lip curling when he saw the blood staining his fingers.

He shot her a warning look, a cruel glint in his eye, and a bolt of fear shot through Lily. He had a wand, and she didn’t, and by his own admission he probably knew more Dark spells than anyone else on board.

“No wonder Severus hated you,” she said. “You’re just as rotten as your family.”

“No wonder you were friends with Severus. You’re clearly on the same side as him.”

She nearly told him to get out, but she had no right, and that burned. She had nowhere to run, nowhere safe to go. She was stuck on a ship with people who had joked about killing her, who had no respect for her friend, and who seemed to be following a map written by a madman.

“All of you think you’re so clever,” she said, “thinking you’ve caught me in the middle of some grand scheme. You think you can treat me like dirt because there’s a slim chance I’m here to—well, I don’t know, exactly, throw you off course? What am I supposed to be doing that’s so bloody threatening? You’ve got no evidence to go on and you’re being a complete arse just because you can!”

“Oi, what’s going on here?” Marlene strode into the room and over toward them. Her hair had gone dark with rainwater, her shirt clinging to her body. She looked between them and saw the blood on Sirius’s face. “Get up to the crow’s nest, Black. Right now.”

“You’re not in charge, McKinnon.”

“No, but James sent me to come remind you where you’re supposed to be, and I find you hiding in the common room. What, afraid of a little thunderstorm?”

“Fuck off.”

“I will once you get to work.”

He made a low, threatening noise in his throat, and then spun around and stalked out of the room.

Marlene sighed and began wringing out her hair. “What happened?”

“He had some very unkind things to say about a mutual acquaintance.”

“Oh, Snape? What a tosser.”

“Sirius or Severus?”

“Both.” Marlene reached out a wet hand to grab Lily’s wrist. “Hold on, I can fix that.”

She pulled out her wand and murmured a spell, tracing her wand along the cut. Lily’s skin knit together perfectly behind the spell, without even so much as a scar.

Lily gave a rueful smile and dropped back onto the sofa. “Thanks.”

“Did he do that to you?” Marlene sat down next to Lily, apparently unconcerned that the cushion beneath her began absorbing the water still dripping off of her. “Because James won’t stand for that.”

Lily shook her head. Her heart had started slowing down to a normal pace, but her body still prickled with leftover adrenaline. “He was just being a twat. He didn’t mean to cut me.”

“Not really fair, fighting an unarmed witch, is it?”

“I would think not.”

Marlene grinned. “But it looked like you smacked him. That doesn’t happen accidentally.”

“Would that someone would loan me a wand so I could castrate him. Or give me a knife. Either way, I could do it.”

“Mm, I know the feeling.”

Thunder grumbled outside, just enough to remind the world it was there, but not with any particular malice.

Lily leaned back against a throw pillow. “Please tell me you’re not here to warn me about Severus, too.”

Marlene shrugged and pushed a wet lock of hair out of her face. “I don’t know what the point would be. I never liked him, but James and Sirius have always hated him the most of anyone.”

“Oh, the Fates would trap me on a ship with Sev’s enemies, wouldn’t they?”

“Fate didn’t do anything. You brought yourself here.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t blame someone else, does it?”

“No. But I don’t think the courts would buy ‘The Fates made me castrate him’ as an excuse.”

“I suppose not,” Lily sighed. “But from the sound of it, your courts aren’t anything like fair.”

“No,” Marlene said sadly, “not anymore.”

\--

The rain didn’t let up for the rest of the morning. Lily tried to get back into her book of plays, but her mind kept wandering, and eventually she set aside Aristophanes entirely.

The problem was, it wasn’t _entirely_ shocking that the crew said those things about Severus. He was difficult, and sad, and sometimes the way he spoke about other people…he did think he was better than them, in a way. He made disparaging comments sometimes about the idiots and fools in his classes, and expected Lily to laugh along with him.

Although that had bothered her sometimes, and although she’d never laughed at those things, he’d never treated Lily with anything less than the utmost respect. Sometimes he’d taunted Petunia, yes, but that was _Petunia_ , and he’d never seriously hurt her.

He had the potential for malice, but to hear that he had joined up with What’s His Face, with people who wanted to _kill_ Lily…it seemed unfathomable. But if Sev had been offered a position of power, he would have taken it without question.

She wrapped her arms around her knees, feeling gutted, and more alone than she had in months.

She’d never know if he had stayed away out of concern for her safety, or if he simply couldn’t face her when he was technically supposed to turn her over to the authorities.

It felt like losing him all over again.

Only this time it was worse because she wasn’t just speculating about his absence. She knew perfectly well where he was, but if she approached him now, she wouldn’t be able to trust him. She wouldn’t know for certain that he hadn’t changed his ways, that he wouldn’t turn on her in a second.

She squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her face into her knees.

“Lily?”

She whipped her head back to look at the door, elbow running into the back of the sofa. But it was just James and his cat, both soaked to the bone.

“Yeah,” she said.

“Ugh, I can’t even see you.” He wiped his glasses off on his shirt, replaced them, and slanted a small smile at her. “There we go.”

She made a show of looking him up and down. “You’re only concerned about your glasses?”

Algernon shook himself, the water from his fur splashing onto James’s already drenched trousers, and James sighed. He drew his wand in a line from his shoulders down, steam trailing behind it as his clothes dried, and then used his sleeve to dry off his face.

“You’re still dripping,” she said as he approached her.

He’d done nothing to his hair, still plastered to the sides of his head and dripping water onto his shoulders.

“My hair is immune to most spells.” He sat down on the other end of the sofa. “I’d have worn my hat if it wouldn’t have filled up with water.”

Algernon had followed him and looked ready to leap into his lap.

“Oi,” James told him, “none of that. Either you suffer being wet, or you let me dry you off, and I’m not drying you off because I remember what happened last time, so there’s really no choice at all.”

Algernon growled and shuddered once more, sending a few more drops of water at James.

“Moody little thing,” James said to Lily.

Algernon headbutted James’s shin, and Lily found herself letting out a soft laugh.

“Still working on the mad pirate thing?” she asked.

“It’s a work in progress.”

Lily watched Algernon curl up in a ball on the floor, looking like a mouse he’d eaten had gone off.

“So I hear you and Sirius had a lovely encounter earlier this morning,” James said.

“Oh, yes, very memorable.”

“Do I need to intervene?”

Even though James had tried to get everyone to stop joking about killing her, this—this was something different. This was an active offer of protection from the people he trusted.

A strange ache blossomed in her chest, but she ignored it in favor of answering James.

“I can take care of myself.”

“I didn’t—I didn’t tell him you knew Snape. He overheard me—well. He overheard me, and given we’ve got so little exciting news around here….”

“Everyone knows.”

“Yeah. So, sorry. I didn’t—”

“You didn’t send me to talk to Sirius about Snape for a reason.”

“They’ve—it’s complicated.” His hand automatically went up to his hair, and he frowned when he seemed to remember it was still wet. His hand dropped back down into his lap. “I don’t think I can tell you much about them, but yeah. Neither of us is the most objective person to talk to about Snape.”

“I gathered.”

“So, yeah. I dunno what Marlene told you. She’s not….yeah.”

Lily nodded. “She seemed a little more balanced about it.”

“Well, that’s true about most things.” He smiled. “So, anyway. Marlene said you’re all right, and Sirius is moping up in the crow’s nest, but I don’t—I don’t want either of you to hurt each other anymore, all right?”

“I’ve no objection to this plan.”

James let out a strained breath. “He’s just—Snape is such a sore topic, and with You Know Who, and Sirius and I—he’s not at his best today.”

She could have made just as many rationalizations for Severus, but arguing would get her nowhere.

“I’ll talk to Remus later,” she said.

“That’s good. He’ll…he’s certainly got a different perspective than Sirius.”

“Don’t tell me they were friends.”

“Oh, Merlin no. But—well, I’ll let Remus do the explaining. He’ll do it best, and it’s only right, really….” He trailed off, one hand rubbing the back of his neck.

“I’ll talk to him after lunch.”

“Good. Good. Well.” He stood up, looking down at his cat, but Algernon growled and curled up tighter. James shook his head, a small smile on his face, and glanced back at Lily. “I’ll leave you to your book.”

Lily nearly asked him to stay—if her shift tracking was correct, he wasn’t on duty at the moment—but she couldn’t seem to get the words to come out.

“All right,” she said instead.

“And let me know if anyone jokes about killing you because that’s—that’s just off limits now, as far as I’m concerned.”

“Thanks. I do…I appreciate that.”

“Right. Then. Later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A million thanks to Zeina (aka coconutcrowns on tumblr) for making such an awesome map to my specifications!!


	6. Off Limits

Lily moved a pawn. “Tell me about Severus Snape.”

Remus watched her pawn for a long moment. The rain outside had let up after lunch, reduced now to a pitiful, miserable drizzle.

“I admit,” he said, “I’m curious to learn how you know him.”

“We grew up together, and I never knew him as anything other than a good bloke. Harsh, sometimes, but good. James told me—well, that he’s working for the Ministry, and that he’s Dark, and I didn’t believe him, and he said to talk to you.”

Although Remus looked distracted while he slid a pawn forward, it wasn’t a bad move. “I think you knew a very different person than we did. The Snape we know from Hogwarts is, well, broken, a little. You’re likely more familiar with his life circumstances than I, but he’s always struck me as someone desperate for love and approval.”

Sirius had been chomping at the bit to talk about Severus, and Marlene had discussed him with less than full enthusiasm, but Remus spoke reluctantly, and accurately.

Sev’s parents had never been anything like kind to him, and sometimes Lily hid him in a spare servant’s room overnight when it seemed unsafe for him to return to the village. In retrospect the household staff had to have told her parents about the surprise guest, but if her parents had known, they hadn’t stopped it.

She toyed with a rook before shifting it, intending to sacrifice it in a few rounds. “James said I should ask you about Severus and your ‘condition,’ whatever that is.”

Remus’s eyes flicked upwards while he seemed to ponder something, but he brought them back down after a moment and smiled in the slightly sad way she’d seen him wear more than once. “I suppose it will be relevant to you soon enough.” He began rolling up his sleeves.

Lily tried not to stare at his scars. “He didn’t make it sound like you were dying, so I’m not sure….”

“Well, we’re all dying, aren’t we? I’m likely dying more quickly than most, but no, not so immediately. Normally I wouldn’t divulge this information, particularly not to those I’ve only just met, but even if you are a saboteur I wouldn’t curse you with this.”

“Which is?”

“I’m a werewolf,” he said apologetically, baring the long scars marring his arms. “The full moon is only two days away. Even if James agreed to release you today, I don’t believe we’d make it to land in time to get you off board before then.”

Lily’s heart began to beat in an odd rhythm. “We’re going to be on board with you while you’re a wolf, but from what I’ve heard, if you bite one of us….”

“No, no,” he assured her. “I’ll be locked in the magazine all night, safe below deck and safe from harming anyone else.”

“Oh, thank God. Sorry, not that I’m—I don’t think you’re awful, but I didn’t—”

“I apologize, I didn’t phrase that as well as I should have. It’s difficult to remember how little you know about the ship.”

“I only know so little,” she pointed out, “because no one will tell me anything.”

“Truly, it’s for your own safety.”

“But how can I _know_ that until you tell me more information?”

“I suppose you’ll just have to trust us.”

Frustration twisted at her stomach. She’d trusted them plenty – she’d told them what she wanted, that she was Muggle-born, that she didn’t need James to babysit her from Sirius. But they didn’t seem to notice any of it.

Instead, she shoved another pawn toward Remus’s side of the board. “What does Severus have to do with your condition?”

“Oh, he rather despises me for it.”

“He would—why would he despise you for it?”

“He believes I’m a monster, I suppose,” Remus said thoughtfully. “I don’t know that he ever used that specific term, granted, but I think that’s the most concise way to explain the things he’s said to me since he learned of my condition.”

“But…. You didn’t choose to become a werewolf, did you?”

“No,” he said with a rueful smile. “I rather didn’t.”

Lily’s lips pressed together as she watched Remus send out a knight. She could best the move well enough—she thought she understood which strategy he was using—but there seemed to be very little to say about Severus. Despite what she knew of him, everyone else was making him out to be some sort of evil villain.

Everyone, that was, but Remus.

“I’m certain that Severus has been a dear friend to you, in his own way. And if you know him, I don’t think you’ll disagree that empathy is not one of his strengths.”

Lily leaned back in her chair, arms folded. She couldn’t agree with him, not outright—that brushed too close to betrayal—and she cursed James for sending her to Remus. Remus, who saw others clearly, and kindly, and had nothing but compassion to offer, even to those who apparently despised him. Remus, who seemed much too humane to succeed in his chosen profession.

She took one of his pawns. “How did you end up a pirate?”

He blinked, a little taken aback. “James asked me to join his crew.”

“And that’s it. That’s all it took for you to join up?”

“I’m sure if you stay on board long enough, you’ll understand.” He smiled. “When James asks, you go.”

\--

Algernon trotted into the common room, the door swinging open for him, and stopped next to Lily where she sat curled up on the sofa. Normally he’d plunk down on the ground and demand to be petted, but this time he stayed standing, and looked up at her expectantly with his one visible eye.

“I’m no cat whisperer.” She dog-earred her place in her book. “I don’t know what you want.”

But Algernon kept looking at her.

“You’ll have to be more explicit.”

He waved his tail in the air twice, and then slowly walked back to the door, which opened again. Then he turned his head back to look at Lily.

“Hang on a minute.” Her eyes narrowed. “It’s almost dinner time, isn’t it?”

Algernon meowed, sounding rather annoyed.

“Is this James trying to get me to join him for an early dinner?”

He finally looked away from her and walked out the door, head held high.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” she muttered.

But she followed him out the door and across the deck all the same. By now the rain clouds had moved on, the ship glimmering in the rays of sun straining through thin clouds, light catching on the raindrops still clinging to the deck and rails.

Sirius stood at the helm looking perfectly bored and elegant, hair blowing in the wind and making him look more attractive than he had any right to with his personality. As Lily approached the door to the library beneath him, she could see a hint of a scowl on his face.

She made a low noise of discontentment, and Algernon looked back at her, curious.

“It’s nothing,” she said, and then realized she was talking to a cat again.

The library door opened for Algernon, and Lily had to admire the spellwork that had gone into the system. If they were in fact a newer crew, they’d probably inherited the ship from someone else – the level of detail in the ship design couldn’t have come from anyone who didn’t intimately understand sailing.

She followed him through the library and into the captain’s cabin, where dinner awaited her.

James turned from the window to beam at them. “It worked!”

She sent him a mock-glare and folded her arms while Algernon strolled over to James. “You sent your cat to fetch me.”

“Brilliant, right?”

“A girl might take offense,” she said loftily, “that you didn't come in person.”

“Hey, you should be honored.” He bent down to scratch Algernon’s ears. “I’ve never managed to get him to fetch a person before.”

“He fetches things other than people?”

“Oh, he’ll fetch food, or papers. Loads of things.” He stood up properly and stretched his shoulders back. “If he’s in the mood, anyway. And it doesn’t work too well on the ship since the galley’s down a level.”

A short, content noise rumbled out of Algernon’s chest.

“I think your madness must be catching,” Lily said, “because I actually believe you.”

“Finally, someone does.”

“You don’t get a lot of that, do you?”

“Sadly, no. It’s a travesty. A massive miscarriage of justice.”

“Now that I don’t believe.”

He grinned winningly at her, and extended an arm toward the table. “I believe you know the way.”

Like a gentleman, he waited for her to sit down first. She reached for the wine and served herself before he could. To her surprise, Algernon circled around twice next to her chair, and then settled in, looking ready for a good nap.

James leaned a little sideways in his seat, his elbow on the table – not that much of a gentleman, apparently. “We got distracted yesterday.”

She poured him a cup of wine. “Did we?”

“We were going to trade answers,” he reminded her, taking his cup back when she offered it.

“I did make that offer, didn’t I?”

“Is it still available?”

“I could be persuaded,” she said, ladling out some stew for both of them, “although after the way you went off about my friend after my first answer….”

“I won’t bring him up again,” James said firmly.

“Thank you.”

“How did this turn into me trying to persuade you to give me answers? _You_ should be trying to win _me_ over.”

She looked up at him through her lashes. “I thought I already had.”

His mouth pulled back in a grin. “In one way, I’ll concede, but not others.”

“Very well, if you _insist_ that I try to win you over.”

“And I do.”

“Then yes, my offer is still available.”

“Excellent.” He picked up his spoon. “Terms?”

“To be determined as necessary.”

“Making things up as you go along?”

“That’s what I do for a living, isn’t it?” She stirred her stew to release some of the heat. “I believe you owe me an answer or two, Captain Potter. Last night I told you I was Muggle-born, and that I knew Severus.”

“Ah, but asking about Snape was only a follow-up question to the original question. It wasn’t a new line of inquiry.”

“It was still a question, and I still provided two answers.”

“Then, please, how may I repay the debt?”

Lily didn’t actually want to know most of the things she could ask, but it did seem more palatable to surrender information about her life if he was forced to do the same.

“What was Hogwarts like?” she asked.

“That’s your big opening question? That’s what you’re dying to know?”

“Yes.”

“If that’s how you want to use your questions. But Hogwarts,” James mused. “Well, it’s only the most marvelous place on earth. It’s a proper castle next to a lake in the mountains, you know? The staircases move and the food is amazing and…and it was home.”

“Is it still open? Or did What’s His Face….”

“The funny thing is, he loves Hogwarts. It’s actually impossible not to. The school is still technically open and running, but….”

“But you stopped attending.”

He nodded. “My friends couldn’t go anymore, not with who they are, and I didn’t want to. Not the way it is now. It’s—it’s not Hogwarts, anymore. It’s in the castle, but it’s not Hogwarts. Not really.”

She lifted her cup to her lips. “Am I to believe, then, that you dropped out of school and became a pirate, of all things?”

“But I’ve just given you two answers – it’s my turn now, isn’t it?”

“The second question wasn’t a proper question. It was…a factual inquiry.”

“So was your blood status,” James pointed out.

“Touché.” Lily fixed him with a smile. “That’s my next question after yours, then.”

“All right.” His eyes darted up and down, assessing. “Have you ever had a wand?”

She looked down and stirred her stew. “No.”

“But you’re a witch, and you know you’re a witch. Why didn’t you go get one?”

“Are we doing one question each or two?”

“Let’s say we allow one follow-up, or we’ll never get anywhere.”

“I suppose I could consent to those terms.”

She fished a piece of beef out of her stew with her spoon, picked it up with two fingers, and bent down to offer it to Algernon. Algernon’s rough tongue lapped at her fingers, and he made a pleased noise, his tail swishing along the floor.

“And?” James prompted.

She smiled without humor. “I never got a wand because I never knew where to buy one.”

“I never—I didn’t think about that.”

“I can’t imagine why you would.”

He chewed for a few moments, apparently pondering her answer by the intense look in his eyes. Finally he swallowed. “But your hairpin is magical.”

She’d encountered a handful of witches and wizards in her time, people with objects or vocabularies that tipped her off. They’d been happy enough to barter. But she’d only found them on ships or in small port towns, far away from wand shops.

“If that’s a question,” she said, “you’ll have to wait. It’s my turn, remember, and I still want to know why you became a pirate.”

He shrugged and looked down at his bowl. “Well, you’ll be disappointed. That topic is off-limits.”

“You can’t just say it’s off-limits.”

“You made Snape off-limits.”

“You agreed not to bring him up.”

“And I’m asking you to agree not to bring up this topic. So unless you’d like to make Snape within bounds….”

She wouldn’t divulge information about Severus, even if he really was working for What’s His Face. She wouldn’t give up his secrets to someone who spoke so poorly of him.

“Fine,” she conceded. “Severus is off-limits.”

“Then so is my piracy.”

“I’d like to point out that that’s a much broader topic to bar, compared to one person I haven’t seen in three years.”

“But we care equally about hiding them, which means they’re effectively equivalent for the purposes of this discussion.”

Lily bit back a grin. She shouldn’t be smiling, not when he kept using her own rule of making up the rules against her, but she so rarely met a good conversationalist among pirates. Besides, he wasn’t wrong, and she knew it, and he knew she knew.

“Can I ask how you got your ship?” she asked. “You’re awfully young to be a captain.”

“I’d argue piracy and my ship are irrevocably intertwined.”

“I’d argue you could have a ship and be a merchant or something. Unless a ship fell into your hands and inspired you to become a pirate.”

He tapped his fingers on the table. “I suppose it’s not _technically_ related to my piracy to say I inherited the ship from my parents.”

Apparently Lily wasn’t the only one in the family business. Although it seemed strange that pirates would send their child to a boarding school in Scotland.

“Were your parents pirates?” She added, before he could object, “That’s not related to _your_ piracy, mind you. It’s related to theirs.”

His lips twitched in amusement. “No, they weren’t. And now it’s my turn—the hairpin. How did you get it?”

“I traded for it.”

“But somewhere you couldn’t get a wand….”

“Is that your follow-up question?”

“No, just speculating. I suppose it doesn’t matter where you got it.” He twirled his spoon in his hand. “All right, if you want to bring up Hogwarts, I have to ask. Why didn’t you go?”

“Simple enough. My parents wouldn’t let me.”

“Care to elaborate?”

“No, I don’t think I do,” she said, smirking. “You’ll have to use another question for that, but it’s my turn.”          

He nodded in concession and sipped his wine.

“Why did you leave England?” she asked.

James took his time answering, sitting up and rubbing the back of his neck. Finally, he said, “That’s related to my piracy, and therefore I won’t answer it.”

“That’s not fair. You could just say anything is related to your piracy to avoid answering, and I’d have no idea.”

“You don’t trust me to play fair? I’m wounded.”

“Pirate,” Lily reminded him.

“Mm,” he said, distracted. “I’ll only say that I left because it was the right thing to do, and because I’d been waiting for the opportunity.”

“Half an answer means I get another question.”

“I certainly wasn’t informed about that possibility.”

“I’m the one with the information you want.”

“Therefore you make the rules?”

“Precisely.”

“And you’re certain you’re not a pirate?”

“Only by birth.” She nearly said ‘only half,’ but he’d already made that joke.

James’s eyebrows shot up. “Oh?”

Lily bit back a curse. That was something about herself she could tell other pirates, but not him. It wasn’t that she was concerned he’d judge her for it—after all, he claimed the same title—but she couldn’t give away things like that, not without making him work for it.

“The game’s over,” she announced, resting her spoon against the side of her bowl.

He flashed a smile at her. “What if I’m not ready to be done?”

“As I said, I make the rules as we go along, and I say we’re done.”

“It’s true, I can’t force you to play.”

“We can play again some other time,” she told him. Now there were rules, and she could think out how to frame some of the things she didn’t really want to reveal to him.

“But who says I’ll want to play again?”

“I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t.”

“You keep changing the rules and then you cut off the game off when you feel like it. Tell me, where’s my incentive to play?”

“I’m a drain on your resources and some of your crew don’t like me. Surely you’ve as much interest as I do in parting ways.”

He shrugged. “Not particularly.”

“But if we don’t play, how am I supposed to….” Lily didn’t need to finish, and sighed instead.

“If we don’t play,” James supplied, “I have to keep enduring your fascinating company.”

It had been entertaining to play at the idea that she had some control over her situation, but the fact that he still held all the cards came crashing back down on her.

He wasn’t a friend. They might pretend they were, and she did enjoy being around him, but that interpretation of their relationship was facile. He was someone she had to get to trust her just enough to let her go, and then they’d never see each other again.

That was all.

\--

Lily awoke slowly to the sounds of someone rustling in their trunk, and she raised her head just in time to see Peter climbing up to the main deck.

If she was going to get off this bloody ship, she’d probably need a majority vote of the crew members. Remus, Marlene, and Caradoc might all vote that she could leave. James and Dorcas had made their feelings clear, and she’d only gone backwards with Sirius.

But Peter.

Peter didn’t seem to care for her, but he also didn’t seem to loathe her very existence.

In fact, he was the most mysterious person on the ship. He didn’t spend much time at meals, but she’d seen him talking to the others in the common room in the evenings. And apart from his watch shift, he didn’t serve any of the usual functions of a crew member. From all appearances, they’d assigned him only to work on understanding the treasure map.

She’d rummaged through his notes again the night before, and although he hadn’t made much progress since she’d last looked, she had found a new sheet of parchment that outlined the details the map hid:

_Need:_

_Starting point_

_Direction_

_Distance?_

Next to _Starting point_ , Peter had written, _Azores Islands._ Someone else had written by that, _You’re the master of the obvious_ , and Peter had written underneath that, _It’s more than nothing_.

Elsewhere Peter and the same person had written another exchange.

_Where did he lay fettered? Who is he?_

_You Know Who._

And below that, a third person had written, _Very funny._

 _It’s the closest thing we have to a location_ , Peter had written. _Could be a reference to the starting point._

Of course, it wasn’t entirely Peter’s fault that he was struggling. The map made no sense. Lily had stared blankly at the map for twenty minutes before abandoning hope of reaching any sudden insight.

She might not have been able to pick Peter’s brain about the map, but she could still try to convince him she wasn’t a saboteur.

Nearly everyone was seated by the time she entered the common room. Dorcas’s naturally displeased face went a shade grimmer, and she and Sirius shared a brief glance of annoyance without pausing in their conversation.

Caradoc lowered the plates onto the table just as Lily slid into the seat between Peter and Marlene.

“D’you want a new dress for tonight?” Marlene asked.

Lily grabbed a piece of toast and shook her head. “No, but thanks.”

Dorcas snorted across the table, but Lily held her head high and ignored her.

“He’s coming around to me, I think,” she said to Marlene, mostly to annoy Sirius. “We had a very nice discussion last night.”

She didn’t miss the dark flash in his eyes as he shoved porridge into his mouth.

After swallowing, he said, “McKinnon the elder says hello to everyone.”

Marlene’s head snapped up, face bright and eager. “Did James talk to him?”

“Not to him personally,” Sirius said, with all the smugness of someone withholding important information. “But he sends his regards.”

“Is Eli doing well?” Caradoc asked. “And Catherine?”

“They seem to be, yeah,” Sirius said, one shoulder pulled back over the chair, his arm dangling behind him. “Catherine’s pregnant.” He wore a cocky grin with an air of not really caring either way, but his smile reached his eyes too much for Lily to believe his act.

“I’m going to be an aunt!” Marlene slapped a hand on the table. “Any idea on names? I mean, besides Marlene, obviously.”

Sirius took a long swig of juice. “Dunno.”

Lily watched Marlene have a small fit in her chair, and glanced sideways to Peter. They shared a brief smile before Peter went back to pouring himself more tea.

“Congratulations to your brother,” Lily said.

Sirius rolled his eyes, but Marlene didn’t seem bothered at all.

“He was supposed to join the crew,” Marlene told Lily. “He taught me everything I know about Healing. And I suppose he’ll teach little Marlene that, too.”

“You’re definitely not being premature,” Sirius said. “Not one bit.”

“Sod off, Black,” Marlene said cheerfully. “You can’t bring me down to your level. Not today.”

“Your brother wasn’t interested in being a pirate?” Lily asked.

“He got married instead, the prat. They were going to wait, but with—well, everything, waiting seemed like a bad idea.”

Lily nodded. “Understandable.”

“Yeah,” Marlene said, at the same time Sirius said, “And we got stuck with her instead.”

Dorcas’s elbow jerked sideways into Sirius’s ribs.

“Oi.” He rubbed at where she’d jabbed him. “I’m just saying I’d prefer to have Eli around.”

“Unacceptable,” Dorcas said.

Marlene smirked at Sirius, and he hunched over his plate.

“Two days in a row of women attacking me,” he grumbled.

Peter set down his glass. “Who else attacked you?”

Sirius angled his head up to glare at Lily, and Peter gave a short nod.

“And you didn’t even kill her,” Dorcas said, in an impressed sort of way.

Sirius threw a dirty look at Marlene. “McKinnon saved her.”

“Hufflepuff,” Dorcas muttered.

Marlene made a noise of protest.

“I take back my jab,” Dorcas told Sirius, and he lazily saluted her.

“How do you suppose your parents are taking the news?” Caradoc asked Marlene loudly. Or at least, loudly for Caradoc, which was enough to shut everyone else up.

“Oh, they’ll be _thrilled_ ,” Marlene said. “They’ve been after me, even….”

Lily had never been one to lose her head around the idea of children, and she turned to Peter, who looked equally bored by the turn in conversation.

“So,” she said, “what’s the best raid you lot have made, then?”

“Er,” said Peter. “Let me think about that.” He didn’t look at Lily—he didn’t seem to like facing her full on—but at least he didn’t outright ignore her.

She smiled, trying to put him at ease. “That many good ones?”

He gave her a quick, half-hearted smile. “Yeah, they’re just—they kind of run together.”

“Your crew certainly seems successful enough.”

Peter nodded. “James is great. He’s a brilliant captain.”

“Have you mostly stuck to Europe? I hear the Caribbean’s lovely, although I haven’t got over that way yet.”

“No, we’ve never left Europe.” HE scooped the last of his egg into his mouth.

“Oh, I went down to northern Africa once. Hot as hell. I left as soon as possible.”

“Yeah, I bet.” He shoved back in his seat, the chair scraping loudly against the floor. “I’m off to the library, then.”

He practically ran out of the room without another look at Lily, and she resisted the urge to sigh.

Sirius shot her a triumphant look when the door had swung shut again. “Sorry, love. It’s a pirate thing. See, with magical pirates, it’s not exactly custom to discuss your previous adventures.”

“Why’s that?” Lily asked. In her experience, bragging rights were half the reason pirates did anything.

“You’d have to ask the pirates that preceded us,” he said, as though it were obvious.

Dorcas snorted into her tea.

Lily looked to Marlene, whose face had closed off. There had to have been some reference Lily was missing out on, like a dead former crew mate, or something.

Dorcas whispered something into Sirius’s ear, and Lily leaned into Marlene. “Custom aside,” she said quietly, “I don’t understand why Peter’s so….”

Marlene’s eyes flicked to Sirius, who was laughing, head thrown back. “He’s just…he’s a nice enough bloke, really. We haven’t talked _too_ much. He’s always tagged along after the others – he can be a little quiet around them.”

“I see that.” Lily’s eyes flicked to Sirius.

She tried the library door after breakfast, but it remained locked. She sighed and turned around to see Marlene casting spells at the ropes connected to the sails. It looked complicated—ropes flew in every direction—and Lily didn’t want to disrupt her concentration.

For company, that left her with James or Caradoc, and James seemed to have disappeared into his cabin after covering watch during breakfast.

Peter would have been the most useful option, but it would be good to talk to Caradoc, too. Although he seemed to like her well enough, it couldn’t help to be sure. Besides, he could answer some questions no one else on board could.

She climbed down onto the gun deck and turned away from the beds, toward a wall with a plain wooden door that she’d assumed led to the galley.

She knocked because it seemed like the polite thing to do, and entered when Caradoc called for her to do so.

The air in the galley was a drastic change from the gundeck, heavy with water and heat, and the walls held sunny, round windows Lily was positive didn’t exist from the outside.

They’d enlarged the kitchen like they had the orlop deck – it stretched further than logic dictated, with long counters, copper pots and pans hanging overhead, and what looked like a pantry door tucked in a corner. Their breakfast dishes sat stacked up neatly next to a nearly overflowing sink. One by one, the plates dunked themselves into the water, and a dishbrush attacked the food remains with vigor.

“And here I pictured you sitting in a dark, manky cupboard peeling vegetables by hand,” she said.

Caradoc sat on a wooden stool next to a bucket, his wand pointed at a potato that slowly rotated in the air, the peel sliding off in one long, narrow strip. He looked up and smiled at Lily.

“I wouldn’t be a cook without magic,” he said. “It’s too much work the Muggle way.”

She grabbed a spare stool and settled in on it next to Caradoc. “Thought you could use some company down here.”

“I would never say no to visitors.”

He probably wouldn’t, Lily thought, but not always because he actually wanted them there.

She watched the peeled potato zoom back to the counter. “I’ll reiterate my deep and abiding love for your cooking.”

He directed his wand at another potato that flew to hang over the bucket. “I’m glad it’s so well received.”

He was kind, yes, but not the most naturally talkative person. He might not bring it up himself, but he’d probably answer, if she asked.

So she did.

“James said you’re the only Muggle-born person on the crew.”

If Caradoc was surprised or bothered, he didn’t show it. “Yes, that’s true.”

“And how…how is that?” Lily crossed one leg over the other. “Being Muggle-born and a part of the wizarding world.”

He tilted his head in contemplation. “It wasn’t so bad, at first. I didn’t even realize there was a perceived difference about Muggle-borns.”

“Did most people look down on you for it?”

“Not most of them,” he said thoughtfully. “Some, yes, although I don’t think they all recognize how deeply they feel it. They said things, or made it clear they thought things, that were worse than they believed them to be.”

“Like what?”

“Like…like if I didn’t get a spell right away, they’d look at me, like, _of course_ you didn’t get it right. They wouldn’t really say it, but you’d know.”

“Did Severus ever—I mean, he never said anything like that to me.”

“I’m afraid I can’t say,” Caradoc said gently. “He and I never really spoke.”

“But you must have heard about the things he said. Everyone else….”

“I did hear about some things he said, but I can’t say I ever heard them from him directly.”

Even if Severus had never said a bad word to Caradoc, that didn’t mean he had never said them to other people, or that he wasn’t Dark. Whatever being “Dark” meant, anyway, besides the obvious connotation of not being particularly good.

“From what I’ve heard,” Caradoc said, “Severus was kind to you. And I think that matters. A lot.”

“It counts for something, anyway.” She uncrossed her legs and fixed him with a tight smile. “But you liked it at Hogwarts? Even though you were Muggle-born.”

“Oh,” Caradoc sighed. “I loved it. After growing up like we did, finding other people like us…I wish you’d been able to see Hogwarts Before.”

She’d never talked about this topic before—at least, not with anyone but Severus, and he’d never been able to relate—but Caradoc had a certain welcoming air to him, a way his eyes focused on hers, listening intently. They were kin, in a way.

She looked down at her lap. “My parents thought they’d have a hard enough time marrying me off without me being a trained witch on top of it.”

“I suppose they didn’t realize you could have met a decent husband at boarding school.”

“Marrying a wizard wouldn’t have been appropriate, not by their standards.”

Caradoc nodded. “My parents didn’t mind the idea of a wizard in the family. They thought I could come back and find ways to help them after I’d learned some things. Of course, they didn’t realize that I wouldn’t be allowed to do magic outside of school until I came of age. Or that’s how it would have happened, if the Ministry hadn’t fallen.”

“You had your wand, though. You could have helped even if What’s His Face was in charge.”

“I wanted to, more than anything. My mother hurt her leg, and she needed help around the house. But I had other things to do.”

Lily frowned. “Like become a cook on a pirate ship.”

He offered her a sympathetic look, but it didn’t help her understand any better. “James asked me to,” he said, “and I couldn’t say no.”

“Of course you can say no,” Lily said, trying not to come off as harsh. “He’s not some omniscient god.”

Caradoc was easily the kindest person on the ship, but to choose the life of a pirate over helping his parents….

“A mutual friend of ours,” he said, “pointed out it might be in my parents’ best interest if no one knew where to find them. If I can’t visit them, it’s much less likely that they’ll be tied directly to me, and much less likely that they’ll be targeted by You Know Who.”

A burning shame coursed through Lily. “That’s—that’s not a terrible motivation,” she said. “Protecting your parents.”

“I’m normally not one for cooking, but James asked me to do it for his crew.”

“Well, he made a wise choice.” She nodded toward the stack of clean, dry dishes next to the sink. “You’re brilliant at it.”

He smiled, thin but genuine. “Thank you.”

“But if you don’t like cooking,” she felt compelled to point out, “you could find other work, you know. Become a real crew member on a ship, or hide out in France, or any number of things.”

“No,” Caradoc said, still smiling, “that’s all right. I’m right where I’m supposed to be.”


	7. Full Moon

“I want to ask something,” James said, sitting down to dinner that night, “but I’m afraid you’ll mark it off-limits.”

Lily draped her napkin over her lap. “If you want to waste a question, I won’t stop you.”

“It’s just that it’s the obvious question. And maybe it’s a waste, but I’ve got all the time in the world, I suppose.” He picked up the bottle of wine. “How did you become a thief of thieves?”

“Well deduced, Captain Potter.” She bent over to pet Algernon’s head while James poured. “I don’t want to talk about that, especially if you won’t tell me how you became a pirate.”

“You were born into piracy, but by your own estimation you’re not a pirate.”

“You are paying attention, aren’t you?” She sat upright again and Algernon meowed in annoyance. “I’d say I’m impressed but that’s a lie.”

“There’s got to be _some_ level of detail you can give me about being born into piracy. Anything at all. You can’t leave me with that one fascinating fact and move on.”

“Not that I’m sorry to disappoint, but I’m afraid you’ll have to ask the right question if you want to know anything more.”

“Very well.” He flashed her a smile. “What did you mean by a pirate by birth? I don’t think that’s part of how you became a thief of pirates, is it?”

“I could argue it is.”

“You can argue whatever you want, but what’s your incentive to do so?”

She sighed. If he really intended to pursue the line of inquiry, it would be in her interest to give him what he wanted. And maybe it would convince him she was who she said she was. It just burned to be forced to discuss things she’d prefer not to.

“It’s as simple as it sounds,” she said. “My mother was a pirate.”

“Mother. Interesting.” He ignored Algernon pawing at his shoe, begging for a scrap of fish. “I did assume father – what about him?”

Willingly admitting to her mother’s profession would have been easier than this. But telling him about her father struck deep, a revelation she hadn’t told anyone since leaving home.

It had made sense to avoid the issue among pirates. Women of the nobility were kidnapping targets, and she hadn’t been about to hand herself up on a silver platter for ransom.

But James wouldn’t do that. At least, she was fairly confident he wouldn’t. He was too obsessed with finding his treasure – whatever was buried there had to be worth more than the entire Evans fortune, if he was pursuing it with such doggedness.

And he’d asked, and she was obligated by her own integrity to tell the truth within the game.

Technically, anyway.

“He was a good man,” she said. “Did different sorts of business.”

“Who’s offering half-answers now?”

“It’s a complete answer – your question was very vague. How is a poor, uneducated thief like myself supposed to know how to interpret your meaning?”

His mouth curved back in a half-grin. “Oh, yes, you certainly need coddling. Very well, you innocent young babe, ask your questions. Don’t think I’m dropping this.”

“I’d never presume to know your intentions,” she said airily. “But my first question: was anyone on this ship a pirate before they joined your crew?”

He shook his head.

“And you personally asked them all to join you?”

He nodded.

She raised her cup and arched an eyebrow at him. “Reduced to nonverbal communication?”

But he seemed to barely process what she said, instead tapping the edge of his plate with his knife. “What was your father’s profession?”

There was nothing for it. It would come out sooner or later.

“Earl,” she sighed. “Now, what do you—”

“No,” James said, eyes going wide.

“Yes. And?”

“You’re a noble pirate!”

“I am _not_ a pirate.”

“But you’re the daughter of an earl! And a pirate! You must admit, that’s dead unusual.”

“Your world experience astounds me.”

“Look, I don’t—I don’t care, you know. Sirius is noble in the wizarding world, much as he hates it.”

Sirius might have been the rebellious heir, but Lily’s running away had been simultaneously a rebellion and a fulfillment.

Not that she had any intention of discussing that with James.

“My turn, I believe,” she said, with enough confidence that he went along with it, his mind apparently still mulling over her noble blood.

“I eagerly await your question.”

“Well,” she drawled, “men like you only want one thing.”

“I’ve heard that, yes.”

“Given that you’re after treasure—”

“Is that what they’re calling it these days?” he asked, his eyes flicking down.

“Mm, we can if you like.”

“I’ll think on it. What was your question?”

She cocked her head and considered him. “Why did everyone come running when you assembled this crew of misfit pirates?”

“Misfit pirates. I like that.” He smiled to himself, just a little. “They came because we’re friends.”

“But why would they just join up with you, leave everything behind? They don’t seem particularly greedy.”

“Intertwined with my piracy, I’m afraid.” He offered her a consoling smile, and it actually reached his eyes.

“Nothing you can give me? Nothing at all?”

“I’ve loads of innuendo, if you like. Which you haven’t really been into so far, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have plenty available.”

“More than treasure?”

He had so many smiles, each one a distinct, clear entity. This one came easily, a crooked, sharp line. “You think I spent six years at boarding school without picking up a hundred words for treasure?”

“No, but as someone who’s spent the last two years on pirate ships, I’m certain I’ve got at least two hundred.”

“I love a woman with a good vocabulary.”

“I’d classify my vocabulary as better than _good_ , thank you. While you were faffing about at Hogwarts, some of us were devouring every book in our admittedly outstanding library. I like to think of my vocabulary as stellar. Or unparalleled. Or superlative.”

“Slow down, Lily, we’re not even to dessert yet. You’ve got to let a man breathe before drown him with your grasp of the English language.”

“What, should I make you work for it?”

“There is that saying about buying the cow when you can have the milk.”

“You’re not exactly monogamous with your metaphors, are you?”

“Nah,” he said, leaning his chair back on two legs, wine held in one hand. “I’m a veritable metaphor harlot.”

Algernon had come back over to Lily, and he looked up at her. He didn’t beg for fish thing time, instead staring at her knowingly.

Lily pretended she didn’t see and sipped her wine, pretending that James looked stupid leaning back that way and not at all dashing with that faint shadow of stubble on his face.

Thankfully, Algernon couldn’t say anything.

Still. She dropped him a piece of fish to buy his silence.

\--

James was…something else. He’d been so utterly reasonable since she’d come on board, asking without demanding, persuading rather than insisting. Mostly, anyway. It almost made her feel guilty for trying to solve his treasure map.

Almost.

Because solving wasn’t stealing. It was mostly fun, something to keep her mind busy. She’d spent enough time on ships to have seen people go dumb or mad with boredom, and she wouldn’t be one of them.

Although conversing with James could be considered a mental exercise in and of itself.

All the same, she sat poring over the map that night while James lounged in the crow’s nest.

After examining the map several times, the Latin words were honestly more baffling than the shapes. Lily could see from Peter’s work that they didn’t string together into any sensible order, and there were no obvious anagrams to be made. She bent over, eyebrows drawing together.

There had to be some sort of pattern or clue. The only thing she’d noticed, the starred cross, hadn’t helped her yet.

Based on the new notes Lily found, Peter had tried his hand at translating again. _A stormy sea comes after a sad wind. It can be hard not to follow fate_.

Peter seemed to be fixated on some of the longer Latin strings, however poor a job he was doing at it. Lily would let him work on that for now, and searched for some of the other clues on the map.

One of the Latin words was _navigatio_. Navigate. As in the ship had to navigate somewhere….

She let her eyes trace over the letters again and again. Why would the mapmaker tell them what they already knew? Obviously they had to navigate. That was what maps were for….

She frowned.

The writer was normally very tidy but he’d missed a spot of ink under the o.

Her eyes slid west onto _aecor_. He’d dropped another spot of ink under the e there, but nowhere else near the word. Just one tiny, insignificant dot.

Lily quickly scoured the rest of the map and found five more specks of ink, each dot clearly under one letter of a Latin word.

She grabbed a scrap of parchment from the pile and wrote down the dotted letters.

_UNESOAC_

Seven letters, one for each of the single Latin words. That could be one word, or two. Or even three, really, with the a.

It might have been nothing. It might have been a fluke. But at least she _felt_ like she was making progress.

Taking a page from Peter, she set out creating anagrams.

She’d run through half the combinations when she heard a creak outside the library door. Her free hand dropped onto the map and her piece of parchment, and froze.

Dorcas threw open the door and stalked inside.

Lily held her breath, her palm damp against the map, her heart thudding painfully. She flinched when a drop of wax landed on her hand, and righted her candle, keeping her eyes on Dorcas.

Thankfully Dorcas was not one to dither. She grabbed a book off the shelves across from Lily, spun around, and stomped out to the main deck again.

As soon as the door slammed shut behind Dorcas, Lily scrambled to roll up the map and shove it back in the cabinet. She snuck out onto the main deck, crept over to the edge, and let the wind yank the parchment full of anagrams out of her hand.

It would be annoying to start over, but better to lose her work than a limb.

\--

Lily had picked up on the crew’s shift schedule within two days, and within three had found herself settled in as part of it. She had mornings with Marlene, afternoons with Remus, dinners with James, and evenings with the crew and the map.

But on Lily’s sixth day on board, Remus never came up for lunch. Caradoc began serving without him, and no one else spoke out to insist that he wait.

At first Lily said nothing either. Remus might have fallen ill, or had some special duty that day.

But then Sirius smacked Peter on the back of the head over something—Lily had missed what had sparked it—and Marlene slumped in her seat, picking at her food.

Two nights, Remus had said, until the full moon.

Even Caradoc’s cooking seemed uninspired after she remembered.

From then on the sun moved quicker than it ever had before, and Lily spent the afternoon alone, trying not to wonder about whether she’d hear howling that night. After the others left, she nicked a piece of parchment from the bookshelf and jotted down the letters from the map.

The closest she came to a seven letter word made of the dotted letters was oceans or ounces. It made no sense as oceans – of course they were in an ocean—but ounces seemed to make even less sense.

She could have tried another tack besides anagrams, but it just seemed logical somehow – she couldn’t think of another reason the mapmaker would have added those dots. And their unique placement—one per word, each hidden in plain sight—screamed that they weren’t an accident.

Whenever she heard someone approaching the common room, she shoved the parchment scrap down her dress, to be dropped into the ocean at a later time. Eventually, though, she gave up on cracking the letters and wandered out on the deck.

But when Marlene, who’d stayed up for an extra shift, misfired a spell and tore a hole in a sail, James shouted for her to go inside, and Lily followed her back into the common room. Marlene declined her offer to play cards, so Lily read next to her until Marlene finally went to bed in the late afternoon.

Marlene had provided some level of distraction, but now, alone again, Lily couldn’t focus on her book. Her mind supplied endless imaginings of what it was like, changing into a wolf, and how awful it must be, and what the chances were that he’d escape and bite the crew.

When the stars were just starting to emerge, Algernon wandered into the common room and hovered inside the door, clearly waiting for Lily.

She sighed and set her book aside. As much as she’d mentally taunted James for this very act, she understood his cat perfectly.

She followed him to the ladder to the gun deck, where he sat down, blinking at Lily.

“You want to go down?” she asked.

He looked at her like she was an idiot, and she scowled.

“I’m the one doing the favor here.”

But she liked Algernon, so she awkwardly finagled him under one arm and tried to climb down the ladder.

It became immediately apparent that she’d underestimated the challenge of climbing a ladder while holding a cat, and she’d only managed to climb down two rungs when she heard Peter behind her.

“Here,” he said, stretching up his arms toward her.

She bent as low as she could, and Peter pulled Algernon out of her arms.

“Thanks,” she said, dropping onto the ground. “He insisted.”

Peter smiled at Algernon, who fidgeted in his arms. “He likes being around Remus. Thinks it helps, somehow.”

“Well, it makes him feel better than doing nothing, I imagine.”

“We’re just about to go in.” Peter handed Algernon back to her. “Hold him until we’ve shut the door?”

“Er, all right.”

Remus, who looked as pale as the moon that tormented him, sat hunched over in bed. Sirius wrapped an arm around his shoulder and helped him to his feet, and together they shuffled forward to climb down to the orlop deck, with Peter, Lily and Algernon a few steps behind them.

Remus moved slowly, awkwardly, like his feet weren’t his own, but Peter and Sirius helped him along, past the shelves and candles. Barrels that Lily assumed normally filled the magazine had been moved to line the wall outside instead.

Lily’s eyes widened when Sirius began to shut the door with him and Peter still inside.

“What are you—” she started to ask, but her question died at Sirius’s stern look.

The door clanged shut, and Lily sat there, unable to do anything, and without the slightest clue as to why they’d trapped themselves in a room with a werewolf on the night of a full moon. Algernon sprang out of her hands and curled up on the ground in front of the magazine door, looking fierce.

Lily sighed and climbed back up to the gun deck, past a sleeping Marlene, and kept on until she’d walked right up to James at the helm.

He tried to smile when she came up the steps, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Well, this is the worst,” she said, leaning backwards on the rail in front of him.

“Yeah.” He stepped around the helm and rested his forearms on the rail next to Lily. “I’d go down if I didn’t have to take care of the ship. But it’s pointless to just sit outside the room, I suppose.”

“I don’t think so,” Lily said softly.

He shrugged.

“Are Sirius and Peter…. Will they be all right in there? With him?”

“Hm? No, they’re safe. Don’t worry. They know spells to protect themselves.”

“They’d risk that? To protect us?”

James hummed in response and looked out at the horizon. “Not just us. They protect Remus, too. It helps, having them in there.”

Regardless of their skill as wizards, from what Lily knew, no sane person would willingly hang around a transformed werewolf for a minute, much less all night. She’d seen a protective glint in Sirius’s eye, though, and how he’d stridden into that room without fear. Peter didn’t radiate every emotion the way Sirius did, but he hadn’t hesitated for a moment before locking himself up with a werewolf, either.

“Is it awful,” she asked quietly, “being a werewolf?”

James smiled without humor and ducked his head. “Remus doesn’t complain about it—not ever, stupid git—but I’ve never seen anything more gruesome than his transformation. And I’ve seen a man lose his insides.”

Lily swallowed loudly. “You’ve seen him transform, then? Done those spells?”

“If the magazine would hold me I’d be in there myself.”

The tense line of his shoulders stood profiled against the moon hanging low in the sky, his head still hanging.

She thought of doing it, and then told herself she shouldn’t, and then told herself she must, and then she reached out and squeezed his hand.

She nearly pulled back at the shocked expression he shot at her, but his hand had already clasped back, unrelenting in its grip.

“You’re a good friend,” she said, for lack of other options.

“Thanks.” He looked down at their entwined hands, quirked a half-smile at it, and pulled his hand loose.

Lily was no stranger to the fluttering in her stomach. She wasn’t fool enough to pretend she didn’t know what it meant.

But clearly she was fool enough to get it in the first place.

He was holding her captive.

He was a pirate.

He had really good hair, yes, but she told her stomach it was stupid and wrenched her gaze out toward the sea.

“I’m going to—go,” she said.

He nodded, and she fled.

\--

Lily awoke plenty of times in the night, every groan of the ship or footfall of someone coming to bed rousing her to full alertness. At the snick of a trunk opening, she awoke gasping, sitting up straight in bed, blanket clasped to her chest.

Marlene gave Lily a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, they can’t get out. Do you want a sleeping potion? Might be a bit groggy in the morning, but less than if you don’t sleep at all.”

Lily declined the offer, but then lingered on the verge on sleep, only to be jerked back into consciousness every time she realized she was about to actually fall asleep.

She awoke again in the morning at the sound of shuffling feet. Peter and Sirius helped a limping, shirtless Remus down the gun deck, his arms wrapped around their shoulders. Lily’s eyes fell on two new vivid gashes that ran along his chest.

They lay him on his bed, where Marlene sat waiting with her wand in hand. Remus groaned as he adjusted himself on the bed, a muffled, agonized noise, and Lily’s heart broke, just a little.

Helplessness dragged at her, an ocean current pulling her down into the depths, and she had nothing to grab hold of.

She sat up to see over the cannon between her and Remus. Marlene had set to work at once, murmuring spells as she trailed her wand along his wounds. They didn’t disappear, but the blood vanished and the swelling lessened, and the lines on his face lessened, at least a little.

Sirius and Peter brought Algernon up from the orlop deck and collapsed into their own beds, while Lily sat there, incapable of moving or offering anything. Algernon climbed onto her lap, and her hand started idly running along his back, grateful for something to do.

Marlene applied a salve to Remus’s chest, and then another to a fresh bruise on his palm, gently kneading it in. He smiled at her weakly, saying something Lily couldn’t make out. Marlene let out a low chuckle.

Lily nearly left—they seemed to be having a private moment—but settled for looking away. She couldn’t leave, not yet, and not only because she didn’t want to draw attention to her gawking. Instead she focused on Algernon’s rough fur beneath her palm. He needed a bath.

Marlene stroked Remus’s hair back from his forehead before bundling up the jars in a cloth. She threw a quick smile at Lily, tucked her potions into her trunk, and disappeared up to the main deck.

“It’s not as bad as it looks,” Remus said, although his subsequent groan said otherwise.

“I doubt that,” Lily said.

Algernon leapt out of her lap and trotted around the cannon to lie down next to Remus.

“I’ve had worse nights,” Remus said.

“Is this the result of a good night?”

“No.” He rolled his shoulder, and grimaced. “The wolf doesn’t care for being on a ship.”

“You could rethink your lifestyle choices.”

Remus let out a low, deep laugh that mutated into a haggard cough. “That’s very thoughtful, Lily, but believe me, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

\--

The sun shone high in the sky when Lily emerged onto the deck, its rays half hidden by tall, billowing clouds that looked like painted brush strokes. Marlene stood nearby, bespelling some ropes to reweave themselves into the rigging on the main mast, but Lily passed her by and instead swung by the common room for a piece of fruit before retreating to the forecastle deck. The sun helped chase away the crisp memory of Remus’s bleeding chest, the brisk air fresh and welcome on her face.

She heard the door to the library open in the distance behind her, and her body turned automatically, her lips curling into a smile.

Her smile fell.

It was just Sirius emerging from the library. He paused, looking around the ship, and spotted Lily. He shot her a smug grin, and made his way up to the helm for his shift.

A cocky smile from James was endearing. From Sirius, it was unbearable.

Still. She had things to say to him, and she was no coward.

She marched down a set of stairs and up another, until she was directly in front of him.

“Hi,” she said.

He raised his eyebrows, the picture of a bored lord, if most lords made a habit of practically lounging on pirate ship helms.

“I know you prefer pretending I don’t exist,” she said, “but I needed to say something, and then I’ll go, all right?”

He waved a lazy hand through the air. “Then say it.”

She pulled her shoulders back and shook her hair behind her shoulders. “I think what you did for Remus—whatever it is—is really brave. He deserves friends who’ll do that sort of thing for him.”

If Lily hadn’t seen Sirius scowl at her every day for the past week, she might not have been able to tell the difference between when he was actually annoyed, and when he was just feigning it.

He was definitely pretending now.

“Yeah, well,” he said, shrugging off something invisible, “someone’s got to or he’ll tear himself to shreds.”

“Good,” she said firmly. “Well, that’s it. We can go back to pretending the other doesn’t exist now.”

“Brilliant.”

“Right.”

“Also,” he said, as though it were only barely relevant, “James won’t have time for dinner with you tonight.”

“Oh. Well. Thanks for telling me.”

He started to roll his eyes, and she turned around to hurry down the steps.

It was probably nothing. It was probably related to the shift changes or their mission or…something. It probably wasn’t about her at all.

All the rationalizations she could imagine didn’t matter, though. Her chest still twinged, and she retreated to the forecastle deck.

\--

With Remus out of commission, everyone on the crew pulled extra shifts, leaving Lily to entertain herself after lunch. She tried to read, and tried to play chess against herself, and even tried just staring out at the sea, but nothing interested her. She fidgeted when seated, and wanted nothing more than to lie down after standing on the deck for ten minutes.

Mostly, annoyingly, she thought of James, and his wind-tousled hair, and his ever-moving mouth, and his oh so faint stubble.

She hadn’t thought of anyone this way in a very long time.

On the one hand it felt like what she thought heights must do for other people, an exhilarating thrill well worth the danger.

But while others found a certain rush in significant heights, Lily was terrible at them. Thinking of James that way made her feel like she was in the crow’s nest again, with nothing but a thin railing between her and a perilous freefall.

Normally when she felt any sort of stirring she threw herself in, like she had with Sam. They’d fallen into a mutually beneficial relationship the first night they’d met, perfectly understanding each other without speaking the words.

But James….

Presumably she’d be on board a while longer yet, and she couldn’t very well spend the whole time wondering whether his palms were rougher than hers.

And besides, he’d flirted with her. He’d admitted he found her beautiful, and his attention never wandered far from her when she was around.

She wouldn’t have minded some relief on board, not with the baseline level of anxiety she faced just by being trapped around Sirius and Dorcas.

It would be good for both of them, and probably loads of fun. He was playful, and generous. Surely he’d make it worth her while. She could certainly make it worth his.

She skipped out on dinner—she wasn’t going to sit in a room with only Peter and Dorcas for company if she could avoid it—and pilfered a snack from the galley after Caradoc brought up dinner.

She couldn’t borrow another dress from Marlene, who was sleeping, but she tried to make her hair look as presentable as possible and clattered up the ladder to the main deck.

She stole through the dark library, stepping lightly out of habit, but then hesitated in front of his door.

Maybe this wasn’t the best idea, but she—she wanted to try, if nothing else. It made sense, it was practical, and…she wanted to know if he kissed like she thought he would.

She knocked on the door, just once.

At first she heard nothing, no footsteps or comments to Algernon. He wasn’t necessarily inside, of course – she hadn’t checked to make sure he wasn’t in the common room.

But soon enough he opened the door.

“Er,” he said. “I’ve already eaten.”

“So have I.”

“Then…did you need something?”

“Yes. May I come in?”

He studied her for a moment before fully opening the door for her. She passed through and sat down on the edge of his table, now cluttered with parchments.

He stood next to the open door, arms folded, waiting expectantly. Something so simple shouldn’t have been so endearing. It might not have been if he hadn’t been wearing that bloody hat of his.

She slowly crossed one leg over the other. “I’ve been a bit bored,” she said, keeping her voice low and smooth.

“Hmm,” he said.

“And I thought, maybe, you could help me keep entertained.”

“I’m only fun when I’m talking to my cat, and he abandoned me for the evening.”

She ducked her head, her hair falling forward to frame her face. “I’m sure we could think of something else to keep ourselves occupied.”

He raised his eyebrows. “I can’t help but feel you’ve something specific in mind. But my Legilimancy’s always been crap.”

“Well,” she said, drawing out the word. “I’ve heard physical exertion can be very helpful on ships. To use different muscles, and all.”

He kicked the door shut with one easy movement and sauntered over to her, hands in his pockets.

“Mm, haven’t heard that before.” He came to a halt in front of her, her foot nearly grazing his shin. “I liked the treasure euphemism better, all things considered.”

“I’m flexible,” she murmured, reaching up to play with the shirt strings around his collar.

“In more ways than one, I should think.”

“Oh,” she said, pulling on the cords, enough that they drew tight, enough for her to use it as leverage to pull his chest down toward her, “more than you can imagine.”

In one swift movement, she stood up, pulled his head down toward her, and captured his lips in a kiss.

Fortunately, he was better than she’d expected, unrelenting and demanding.

Unfortunately, the kiss lasted about five seconds.

He abruptly stepped back, and she slackened her grip on his shirt strings to avoid strangling him.

“Actually I’m feeling plenty relieved,” he said, eyes flicking about the room. “So I don’t think I’ll be much help.”

“Not even to do a girl a favor?”

The line of his throat bobbed as he swallowed. “Well, the thing is, and this is coming from me, mind you, it seems like a bad idea.”

One of his hands had wandered up to clasp the back of his neck, and he wouldn’t meet her eyes.

Lily was no fool.

“Right.” She stood up and brushed imaginary dust off her dress. “I mean, if you think I can’t keep it from the others—”

“That’s not—I mean, for one thing, I’m holding you prisoner.”

“And for two?”

His eyes finally found hers, but they were hard. “The one I gave should be plenty of reason for you, I should think.”

There wasn’t actually a thread pulled tight around her heart, but it certainly felt like it, sharp and pinched. “I’m sorry if I misread,” Lily said, her cheeks heating. “I’ll just—I’ll just leave, then.”

“I think you should.”

“Right. I suppose…good night, then.”

“Good night.”


	8. Unfettered

**Part II**

“Caelum, non animum, mutant, qui trans mare currunt.”  
(Those who run across the sea change their Heaven and not their soul.)

—Horace

\--

“Oi.”

Lily’s eyes snapped open, her arm flying up to shove away the person leaning over her.

A hand grabbed her arm.

“It’s me,” James said.

Lily’s brain supplied the alluring thought that maybe he’d changed his mind, but his face, shadowed in the low light of his wand, spoke of anything but.

“Obviously,” she said curtly.

“Come with me.”

Lily looked past him toward the far wall of the ship, where faint light strained through the thin gaps around the gunport.

“I’ll be up soon enough,” she said. “You’d better have woken me up for something good.”

“We’re about to take port.”

A ray of hope shot through Lily. “And you’re letting me go?”

“The opposite.”

It had seemed like maybe she was getting through to him, that he was warming to her, but clearly she had completely misread him.

“Right,” she said, and she was definitely not feeling like she was going to cry because that was pathetic, even if everything seemed hopeless. “Lovely.”

“Come on. I’m taking you to the magazine.”

Her throat felt completely better, then, not tight at all.

He could have knocked her out with magic, or manacled her to another shipmate. But he couldn’t have picked a better location than the magazine, as far as Lily was concerned.

“I’m coming,” she said, letting her voice sour.

She climbed down the ladder to the orlop deck after him and, arms folded, followed him past the shelves to the magazine. He wasn’t looking at her more than necessary to ensure she was in tow, and when he did, it wasn’t—he’d looked at her differently before. Or she’d been deluding herself, and her seduction attempt had fully turned him against her.

The steel door beckoned her from across the long room. It should have been ominous and threatening, but Lily’s heart was racing with the tantalizing thought of freedom.

“So I’m just supposed to sit tight,” she said as he inserted a large metal key into the keyhole, “and be bored out of my mind.”

“You didn’t want to wake up? Consider this a day of sleeping.”

The James of two days ago would have offered her a pillow, or a book. This brusque version of James made her miss him, an aching knot in her chest.

He twisted the key and, heaving with his weight, pulled open the door.

Lily glared at him one last time and stepped inside.

“At least give me some light?” she said.

He cast a spell to light a lone candle on the wall behind her.

Most magazines wouldn’t have had candles, of course, but she assumed the barrels stacked neatly around the room were spelled against accidental ignition. They hadn’t been spelled airtight, though; her nose wrinkled at the acrid smell of gunpowder.

James didn’t even apologize for locking her in, just nodded and shut the door on her. She heard him twist the lock, and then there was silence, leaving Lily with gunpowder, a candle, and a stream of light through the keyhole for company.

Even the stream of light vanished soon enough.

Which meant James had climbed up to the gun deck.

Which meant Lily was alone and theoretically unarmed.

She turned to the barrels around her and smiled.

\--

She sat with her back against a barrel, tapping her feet on the ground. The ship had stopped rocking with the waves of the ocean half an hour ago, and had stopped moving entirely not long after.

She’d have liked to sleep a bit more to be ready for a desperate run, but her body nearly vibrated with anxiety.

This was her best bet.

They’d changed direction last night, more south than west, and it had been a little over a week since she’d come on board. They had to be landing in Portugal, or possibly the northern coast of Spain.

Her mind ran through the ports: A Coruña, Vigo, Oporto. She’d have preferred Lisbon—she knew someone who owed her a favor at the Tower of Belém—but they couldn’t have arrived so far south so soon. Then again, by her estimate, they were already moving quicker than Muggle ships, but Lisbon still seemed too far off.

She made herself wait a good thirty minutes past the time when she was itching to leave, pacing in the small space between barrels to work off some of her frenetic energy.

Finally she could wait no longer.

She slipped her hairpin out, fed it into the keyhole, and with one quick turn she was free.

She gently pushed the door shut behind her and tiptoed across the orlop deck. She stopped near the ladder, trying to listen for footsteps or other rustlings above. Given the chance to go on land, the crew probably wouldn’t have stuck around to sleep.

Still, caution wouldn’t go amiss.

She stepped lightly onto the first rung of the ladder, and then another and another, until she could just peer her head over the floor of the gun deck.

As best she could tell, none of the crew lay between the cannons.

She crept up the rest of the way and crouched on the ground, eyes sweeping the room for movement. When she saw no evidence of the crew, she stood up and snuck down the deck, past empty beds and cannons, heart hurtling itself against her chest. When she reached the ladder at the end, she paused again.

Someone was on the main deck.

A man, based on the heavy footfalls.

One man, or even two, it didn’t matter. She hurried back to her bed and groped around under the thin mattress.

Lit candle balanced precariously in her mouth, she poked her head above the main deck, eyes blinking at the bright sunshine.

They were in the river in Oporto, based on the way the orange rooftops of the city sloped gently away from the river. She’d been here once before, early on in her journeys. Most pirate ships wouldn’t have pulled all the way into a pier for a brief stay, but magic probably made it easier.

Sirius stood below the main mast, his head tilted back to look up at the shroud, one hand gently waving a wand to fix a fraying knot halfway up.

Only an expanse of deck lay between her and freedom.

She climbed off the ladder, mind scrambling to remember anything about Oporto, and began slinking toward the gangway to the pier.

And then she abruptly stopped.

Some of her effects were still in James’s cabin, tucked safely under his bed.

Money she could get within minutes of being on land, a dagger not long after, and the mokeskin pouch she could replace, albeit with effort.

But her necklace….

She’d taken nothing else when she’d stolen away from her parents’ estate in the middle of the night. It was the one thing she’d never considered selling for food. She’d protected it from thievery on the first ships she’d crewed, before she’d got her pouch, and she’d hunted down the man who’d dared to take it from her after they’d shared a perfectly nice night together. She’d stolen it back, of course, along with his moneybag and his lunch.

She couldn’t leave her necklace behind.

But James and Sirius were a matched set. James had probably offered to stay behind while his crew gallivanted around, and Sirius would have insisted on staying with him.

She needed to know if James was on board and, if so, if he was in his cabin. Which was to say she needed to get him out of his cabin and properly distracted, just long enough that she could run in and out of his room without being noticed.

Her assets included her candle, a mostly empty box of matches, her hairpin, and her wits.

If only she had a weapon.

And then she remembered she did.

\--

She awkwardly maneuvered up the ladder to the main deck again, this time a cannonball threatening to fall out from between her breasts and rip her bodice.

She liked to think that after her week and a bit on board, she’d learned something of James’s character, and what would draw him out.

She didn’t mean to knock Sirius out cold.

But when she heaved the cannonball against the side of his head, wincing before it even collided with his temple, he didn’t cry out like she’d hoped he would. Instead he groaned and staggered forward, arms flailing to gain his balance and brushing against her chest. He slowly collapsed onto the deck, his wand rolling out of his hand.

She looked down at him, her lips pressing together. He would be fine. Probably. She wasn’t that strong, and Marlene could Heal him when she got back. James might even be able to do something for him before the others returned.

But first, of course, she had to get James out on the deck.

She frowned. She had no method for luring him to his injured mate, save shouting for him.

Except she still had the cannonball. And cannonballs could be noisy.

She grabbed Sirius’s wand off the deck, out of practicality rather than vengeance, and shoved it into her bodice, the effect rather like a corset. She took a few steps away and hurled the cannonball down onto the deck. It landed with a deep thud, and Lily’s eyes flicked to watch the library door.

But no one came out.

She chased after the cannonball and picked it up from where it had rolled, raised it up in the air over her head with one hand, and flung it onto the deck again.

This time it landed louder, an unmistakably strange noise coming from someone who was supposed to be messing with the shrouds.

She hurled it twice more, and was debating how else to get James’s attention when he finally sauntered out of the library, eyes fixed on a piece of parchment in his hand.

“Merlin’s tit, Padfoot, would you mind letting a bloke—fuck!” His eyes had come up now, and found Sirius lying unconscious on the deck. He ran over to Sirius, parchment floating to the ground as he reached for his wand instead, and dropped into a crouch. “Fuck!”

Even though he’d just locked her up, Lily’s gut twisted at the wrenching, wounded look she’d put on his face.

Still, she took her chance to dash through the library and into his cabin, where the gentle chiming of buoys in the harbor drifted in through his open windows. She sank to her knees next to his bed, setting the cannonball on the ground.

She yanked the drawer open, grabbed her pouch, and slammed it shut again. The noise hopefully wouldn’t travel far enough to reach James on the deck, and in any case, speed was more important than subtlety. She shoved her mokeskin pouch into her bodice, hand scraping against the point of Sirius’s wand, and stood up, picking up the cannonball with one hand.

She didn’t want to have to use it on James, but she would for her freedom.

She spun around toward the door and had barely managed two steps when James appeared in the doorway, head ducked, eyes dark.

“Oh, sure.” He was as calm and matter of fact as he’d been that night in Brest, only now there was a tinge of malice beneath the calm, like silk over steel. “I’m some innocent thief. I’d never hurt any of your crew.”

Lily took two quiet steps backwards, toward the windows.

He stalked into the room, slowly, methodically, arm outstretched in front of him, wand ready to fire off a spell at a moment’s notice.

Her eyes dropped to her weapons: a cannonball and a candle. Burning him wouldn’t stop him, and she couldn’t get around him quickly enough to bash his head from behind.

She stepped backwards again, glancing behind her to gauge the distance between her and the window.

“ _Accio_ Lily’s cloak,” he said, voice whip sharp.

Lily cocked her head – he hadn’t found her with a cloak, and what would it matter if she had one? But she had more important things to focus on. He was muttering a long, complicated spell, casting his wand in a wide arc.

From somewhere nearby, church bells rang out, loud and clear.

Lily glanced back at the windows again.

Of course.

She took a few more silent steps backward, spared another look at James, and dropped the cannonball out of the open window.

It landed in the water with a gulping splash.

James’s head snapped to face the window. He didn’t waste time running over to see what had gone out, instead whipping around and grabbing the door handle to fling it open.

Lily allowed herself a silent, deep breath.

But then he stopped hard in the process of launching himself through the doorway, catching himself on the frame.

He turned back around slowly, grinning without humor.

“Very clever,” he said. “But I know what a person sounds like falling off my ship, Lily. Better than you, I imagine.”

She suddenly had a vivid image of him forcing someone to walk the plank at wandpoint, and she froze.

But only for a moment.

He’d started muttering again, an eerie sort of chant, his wand ebbing up and down in front of him.

She couldn’t sneak up on him, and he’d easily best her in combat.

She stepped gently to the right, turned around, and swung one foot up to rest on the windowsill, her free hand gripping the frame. She had her other foot up before she could doubt herself, and then she dove, the flame of her candle burning against her hand.

The cool water of the river engulfed her, her dress tangling around her legs. She sank, deeper and deeper, until she could slow her descent. She opened her eyes, but the water was murky, only the marbled sunlight above giving any indication of direction.

She squeezed her eyes shut against the brackish water and kicked hard, powering herself up toward the surface. She found the edge of the ship and followed it up until her head broke the surface.

She sucked in a lungful of air and swung her head around to get her bearings. She could try to climb up onto the pier, but James would catch her there for sure. She could try to swim directly to land—it wasn’t far—but he’d see her there, too.

He’d see her everywhere. Her candle and matches were soaked, and she wouldn’t be using either for a while.

She whirled around toward the far side of the river and grinned.

Any good traveler knew and adored Oporto’s main industry.

Wine.

Dozens of simple wooden sailboats floated down the river toward the ocean, all carrying stacks and stacks of wine barrels.

A bolt of red light landed on the water above her shoulder, and she cursed, ducking down again.

She dived deeper, out of view, and began swimming toward the center of the river. She allowed herself to come up for air once she couldn’t stand it, but the anti-Muggle charms around the ship had to end somewhere. If she could just get past them, James wouldn’t risk revealing his magic by casting at her anymore.

She resurfaced again, this time in the middle of the wide river. A wine ship nearly clipped her on the shoulder, and she launched herself away from it.

After checking that she wasn’t in the line of any more boats, she turned back toward James’s ship. She couldn’t see him on board, or on the pier. He could probably see her, though, her red head an unmistakable sight in the middle of the water.

But he couldn’t get to her, at least not right away.

She kept treading water, trying to decide whether to hitch a ride on one of the wine ships or to simply swim to the far side of the river. But a ship would require taking port somewhere, and eventually he could track her along the river, waiting for her to land.

What she needed to do was disappear into the winding, narrow streets, duck into a shop or an inn, and hide until James gave up.

So she swam, underwater as much as possible. It took longer than swimming on the surface, but he’d have to work to follow her zig-zag path across the river.

\--

She climbed up onto the pier across the river to countless stares. She ignored them, though, and half-ran along the pier, her sopping wet dress clinging to her shaky legs.

She wiped her face off with her hand as best she could and pushed her hair out of her eyes, all the while moving, eyes on constant alert for dark-haired Englishmen.

A burly sailor stepped into her path, a sly grin on his face, but she deftly sidestepped him and continued on her path, her hurried footfalls rattling the wooden slats beneath her.

Her hand ached, and she looked down to see it clenched tight around her candle. She laughed, short and mirthless, and shoved it into her bodice with her pouch and the wand. They stuck out obviously under the wet fabric, but everyone would probably be too distracted by a dripping wet, red-headed white woman wandering the streets of Oporto to realize she had lumpy breasts on top of it.

Now on solid ground, and her legs quickly adjusting to land again, she headed directly into the city, past buildings that came in long, seamless strings. A dark-haired woman hung a wet pair of trousers over the railing in front of her door-length window and eyed Lily.

Lily shot her a smile and continued on.

Even though her body thrummed with energy from her escape, she still savored the thrill of being in a foreign city, even one she’d been in before. She never tired of hearing other languages swirling around her, or wandering down new streets. And Portuguese cities were beautiful, the exterior walls covered in intricately painted tiles.

Lily’s parents had taken her to London once as a girl. London had an energy all its own, and at the time it had struck Lily as odd to be around so many strangers, even buffered as she was by the windows of the carriage. She’d pressed her face against the windows to watch endless people pass by until her father had pulled her back gently by the collar.

They’d stayed in a relative’s house near Hyde Park without once stepping foot more than a block from the carriage or the house. She’d been _to_ London, but not _in_ London.

Her father had left cities as soon as possible to retreat to his estate, but Lily lived for cities. Every port had a flavor of its own, a pulse and a scent and a sound. Oporto moved slower than Lisbon, but the people were certainly not English. They spoke loudly and passionately, not minding if anyone overheard

She spotted a small food stall on a corner, small and dark, and ducked inside between rows of fruits and vegetables. The owner tried not to stare, and she soothed him with a wave and a smile. He nodded back, teeth showing in a hesitant smile.

She pretended to rummage through some unfamiliar fruit and then set them down, her back to the owner, angled so she could still watch for James. It was awkward, but she managed to make pulling her mokeskin pouch out of her bodice look at least somewhat natural.

The only coins she had in the Muggle side were French. She flipped the pouch and dug around, shoving Sirius’s wand and the candle inside for safekeeping and pulling out a few spare bits of gold.

She reversed the pouch again and turned back to the owner, who looked perfectly perplexed at Lily’s strange behavior.

But his grin turned genuine when he saw the gold in her hand.

She grabbed a loaf of bread and a handful of fruits – she hadn’t eaten since dinner, and swimming to freedom took a lot out of a girl. Lily let him get a better deal than he was probably due in the interest of time. She had to move farther inland, farther from where James had last seen her.

The owner wrapped her purchases up in a cloth, and she stepped out onto the street feeling more like herself than she had in weeks. The sun was shining, she wasn’t on a ship, and she was in a foreign city – it was as if her adventure on James’s ship had never happened.

But she wasn’t safe yet, not if James was determined.

She began a meandering path across the city, up through the sloping hills, keeping to the busy main streets. She circled back on herself, kept heading north, and then circled back once more, all the while breaking off small bites of bread.

She walked and walked, her dress and hair slowly drying off.

At long last she had a wand, but the few spells she’d learned from Sev didn’t seem applicable in this situation. Mostly she would have liked a Drying Charm, given the way water still squished around her feet. She could have dried off her candle, matches, and her shoes, too, but instead Severus had taught her how to Levitate items and how to turn a beetle into a button. They’d taken their time moving through his spellbooks, confident that they had years to work together.

And then What’s His Face had interfered.

A large shop window displaying maps and books caught Lily’s eye. Although she’d had to leave James’s treasure map behind, someone else might know of the mysterious treasure in the Azores, wherever those were.

She ducked in through the doorway and smiled, the unmistakable, welcoming musk of books washing over her. The shop reminded her of James’s cabin, with books stacked in piles taller than she, spines facing every which way.

An elderly man in the corner glared at Lily, but she focused instead on a middle-aged man with long, dark hair who was speaking in rapid Portuguese with a young boy. They seemed to be negotiating over a worn book with gold lettering on the cover. After a minute the boy huffed and pulled a small coin out of his pocket.

When the owner had deposited the money in his coin purse, Lily approached him with a tentative smile.

“Buenos días,” she said. She’d only picked up a little Spanish in her travels, but she’d managed to get by in Portugal with it before.

He nodded at her. “Bom dia.”

“Azores Islands,” she said hopefully.

He cocked his head at her and said something – she didn’t understand the words, but he had clearly not taken her meaning.

She walked over to a map tacked to the wall. “Azores?” she repeated, pointing at the map.

But he frowned.

Her pronunciation must have been off. Lily’s eyes flicked around the shop, and she found a parchment and quill set on a tall desk. She walked over, held her hands over the inkwell, and shot the owner a questioning look.

He joined her at the desk and waved for her to continue. She quickly wrote out _Azores_ _islands map_ in her best penmanship.

“Ah!” he said, and nodded. He strode over to a pile of parchments in a corner and flipped through them, the pages rustling.

He came back to the desk with a few parchments in hand and set them on top of Lily’s note. He confidently said something that sounded an awful lot like Azores, with an accent Lily couldn’t duplicate.

The map on top read _O arquipélago dos_ _Açores_ in elaborate calligraphy.

Lily grinned. The pattern of islands outlined below was unquestionably the same one on James’s treasure map.

“Where?” she said.

The owner looked confused again. Lily took the map of the Azores and walked over to the larger European map on the wall. She held up the small map against the big one and moved it around slowly, then turned around and gave him a hopeful look.

He said something else in Portuguese, his tone indecipherable to Lily, and moved to stand next to her. He pointed to the Iberian peninsula, at the dot labeled _Porto_ , and drew his finger nearly due west a short distance.

He looked down at Lily for confirmation that that was what she wanted, and she smiled at him. The word _Açores s_ at underneath his finger, next to a tiny string of islands.

Lily probably had to get to Lisbon to find someone with enough English language skills to tell her any rumors about treasure in the Azores, but that was a surmountable barrier.

“Gracias,” she told the man, offering him a small piece of gold.

She left the shop beaming. The week and a half she’d spend on James’s ship wouldn’t be completely wasted if she could find someone who knew anything about this mysterious treasure.

Although continuing to move seemed the wisest course of action, there was also self-defense to consider. Until she learned more spells, she would need other methods to fight off James or anyone else. So far in her profession she’d got by with only her dagger, but considering some wizards wanted to kill or capture her, she needed something more.

After another hour of wandering through the streets, basking in the occasional breeze that wound between buildings, she finally stumbled across a blacksmith. Examining swords relied on touch and grip, not language, and she soon traded a large gold nugget for a sleek cutlass.

She felt calmer the instant she strapped it to her side. She might not be able to best James with a wand, but she was willing to bet even her amateur sword skills could best his, if he had any at all.

People looked at her differently when she wore an obvious weapon. They weren’t used to seeing a woman with a cutlass—the shop owner had eyed her just as curiously, and had probably overcharged her—but people gave her a slightly wider berth now. She was no longer an object of interest, but rather someone to be respected. She liked that, and wondered why she hadn’t taken to wearing one earlier. It certainly kept irksome men from bothering her.

All day she’d managed to keep to the main, more crowded streets. Assuming James was capable of following her this far, he would have had to get close if he wanted to avoid casting magic in public.

But her energy was quickly fading. She’d eaten half of her bread, but her feet would need a break soon.

She had to find shelter. An inn would have been easiest, especially after she’d lifted the coinpurse off a man on the street who’d leered at her, but it also offered the least protection. She didn’t want a room to herself, not when she had wizards after her.

If she was going to sell her information, she’d find a bigger market in Lisbon. Fortunately, if there was anything she had experience in, it was arranging transportation. She’d have to go close to the river again to manage it, but finding a ship to spend the night on, tucked safely among a crowd of people, was her best bet for short-term security.

She wandered the streets some more, this time allowing herself to follow the downward slope of the city to the river. Soon enough she heard the caws of seagulls and began watching for the local sailor watering hole.

Her heart skipped when she saw a pale man in the distance, but he was brunette, and too short to be James.

She started following him, slowly narrowing the gap between them, until she could see several tattoos on his arms.

Within minutes he’d led her to a dark, dingy pub half-filled with unsavory, drunk sailors.

She marched in with her head held high. She’d played the innocent for James, but sailors were a different breed than pirates. In her experience, pirates had a great deal more honor than sailors, since they relied on no laws other than their own word. Most of the time, anyway. Sailors often needed more convincing.

She made quick work of negotiating with the soberest bloke in the room, a short, cleanshaven man with a half-full glass of lager in front of him, but his ship was heading north, and she moved on to the next least-troublesome looking man in the room.

He didn’t speak much English, but eventually she walked toward the river at his side. With his light-colored hair and rough English, she pegged Peder as Dutch. He was about twice her height and although he seemed decent enough—he’d agreed to talk to his captain about stopping in Lisbon en route to Africa on her behalf—she kept an eye on where they were going in case he decided to try anything.

Her heart raced faster the closer they drew to the river. She tried to engage Peder in conversation, to make it apparent to James or his crew that they couldn’t snatch her without someone noticing, but the language barrier got in the way.

Even as they crossed onto the pier, she remained on watch, eyes roving as she followed Peder up the gangway.

Like a proper merchant ship, plenty of sailors hung about the main deck. They didn’t intend to leave until morning, but Lily had asked for a place to sleep, and, if Peder had understood, he’d agreed.

She pleaded her case to the captain, who spoke passable English. Normally she’d have negotiated much more frugally, but desperation interfered. If James or his crew had seen her get on the ship, they’d have guessed her escape strategy, and she might not have time to find another merchant.

She followed Peder below deck, ignoring the mostly curious looks of the other crew members. Some of them nudged their friends with eyebrows raised, but most of those looks stopped when they spotted her cutlass. She’d give that to James’s crew, at least; she’d never felt unsafe there.

Although some of the Dutch crew might have taken her cutlass as a challenge, she felt reasonably protected when Peder showed her to a bed. The captain had allowed her on board, after all, and there were too many of them awake for anything untoward to happen before she awoke.

Arms and feet aching, she fell asleep within moments of hitting the pillow.

_\--_

An arm shook Lily awake.

“Urgh, later, Marlene,” she grumbled into her pillow.

“Come,” Peder said.

Lily rubbed at her eyes with one hand as Peder pulled on the other, yanking until she stood up.

“Hmm?” she said. Right. She was on a Dutch merchant ship. No James.

“Captain.”

Lily let him drag her toward the ladder up to the main deck. “The captain?”

“Come,” he stressed, and Lily didn’t see that she had much choice.

It was still afternoon when she climbed off of the ladder – she couldn’t have slept more than an hour, although it felt like it had been much longer.

Lily’s palms began to sweat as she followed Peder across the deck and into the captain’s cabin. Before the crew had eyed her with a bit of lust, and a bit of curiosity, but now they watched her with narrowed eyes.

Peder opened the door for her and she smiled at him in thanks, but the limited amount of warmth he’d shown earlier had vanished.

She entered with trepidation, first noticing the captain sitting behind his desk, and then another man, this one tall, standing with his back to Lily. He wore a fine navy coat with gold trim on the shoulders, and a hat unmistakably from the English Royal Navy.

Her heart stumbled.

She could handle the Navy, but she knew that line of the shoulder, that commanding posture.

James turned around, a thoroughly smug grin on his face, and two rolls of parchment in hand.


	9. Pirate Smith

“Ah, Pirate Smith,” James said.

“ _What_?”

“I thank you for your assistance in my chase, Captain Adriaans,” he said, his voice the very embodiment of authority. “It’s international collaborative efforts like these that make our nations stronger.”

“You’ve some nerve, pretending to be in the Navy,” Lily said. “Captain Adriaans, this man is a pirate.”

“Poor girl, simply can’t stop lying. It’s all that time she spends with her fellow pirates, you know. They’re a bad influence.”

“I’m not a _pirate_. I’m not even branded.” She turned to the captain, just barely keeping herself from shouting, the blatant injustice of James’s accusation clawing at her. “He’s no evidence at all.”

“I’m an agent of Her Majesty’s naval forces,” James said, offended. “And I have the appropriate paperwork.” He took one of the scrolls out of his hand and waved it at her. “My credentials,” he said, tucking it under his arm. He unrolled the other parchment, this one much more worn and ragged, and held it up for her to see.

The bastard had made a wanted poster for her, and had even added a surprisingly accurate drawing of her face. James’s gambit was so sneaky, so underhanded—pirate, Lily silently reminded herself—and her hand twitched, nearly reaching for her cutlass.

Once again, though, she was outnumbered.

“An obvious homemade forgery,” she said, trying to stall. She had to think through this, but her brain was floundering, her heart hammering. She couldn’t have got so far only to be out-lied. “You’ve no more proof you are who you say you are than I do.”

As true as that statement was, neither Peder nor Captain Adriaans seemed convinced by her argument. James looked the part of a royal officer, after all, and he carried himself with the appropriate demeanor, and he had documentation to substantiate his claims.

And, perhaps most significantly, James was a man. Men of proper society would never listen to a woman over one of their own gender.

All Lily had was her mokeskin pouch, a dress filthy from her swim and citywide trek, and a cutlass. In retrospect, she should have gone for a weapon less associated with pirates.

She stood with arms folded tightly, trying to hide her growing panic at the inescapable direction the situation was heading, as Captain Adriaans offered James a pair of manacles. There would be no running once she was chained, no distracting them and slipping away unnoticed.

“Good luck,” Adriaans told James. “Catch more pirates.”

“Will do, Captain.” James turned to Lily with the manacles. “Are you going to cooperate?”

Peder didn’t offer her the chance, though, shoving her chest into the wall and wrenching her arms behind her back.

“You’re not even going to let a lady have her arms in front?” she said.

“You’re a pirate,” James said, snapping cold iron onto her wrists, “not a lady, and pirates are not to be trusted.”

“Obviously,” she muttered.

She refused to speak to or look at James as he pushed her down the gangway, keeping her head held high despite the dirty looks she got from sailors on the pier.

James walked at her side and kept a firm grip on her irons with one hand, her cutlass in the other. Even if she ran, no one would help her run away from a naval officer. If they’d been in a pirate port, perhaps, but not among honest merchants.

“Come on.” James steered her over to a rowboat tied to the pier. “In you go.”

He moved aside to let her hop down, but she took a step back instead, eyeing the city next to them.

“This would be much easier if you freed my arms,” she tried.

“I was trying to offer you a bit of dignity,” he said, his hand gripping her irons tightly again, “but fine, continue to be an enormous pain in the arse.”

“I’ll stop being a pain once you stop holding me captive.”

“You’re the wronged party? Might I remind you, you’re the one who lied to me, you’re the one who tried to steal from me, and _you’re_ the one who whacked my best mate in the head!”

She arched an eyebrow at him. “When you put it that way I sound bloody impressive.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake. I’d push you into the boat if I weren’t such a gentleman.”

“Gentleman pirate? Is that your new claim?”

But James didn’t respond. He seemed to be debating how to get the both of them in the rowboat without letting go of her.

“Just get in first,” she said sweetly. “And I’ll stand here and wait patiently.”

He pressed his lips together and frowned. “This would be so much easier with magic.” He glanced around and waved at a nearby sailor. “Oi! Help a bloke out?”

The sailor hesitated, and Lily held out hope, but then James shouted again, and this time the man came toward them. He didn’t speak English, but James managed to indicate that he needed help getting his prisoner into the boat. The man obliged, holding onto Lily’s irons until James had lowered himself into the boat.

James waved for the sailor to bring Lily to him. She started to crouch down, expecting to more or less hop into the boat on her own, but instead the sailor picked her up under her armpits.

“Oi!” she shouted. “I’m not a sack of potatoes.”

She almost kicked out, but his grip on her was tenuous, and she couldn’t swim in manacles if he dropped her. Reluctantly she forced her legs still.

“You could’ve got in willingly,” James reminded her. “You chose this.”

“Rubbish!”

James grabbed her legs, and the sailor slowly lowered her, until James’s arms came around her midsection. He swung her around, nearly losing his balance, and then settled her feet onto the bottom of the boat.

It was humiliating.

She was also well put out that in spite of this embarrassment, her stomach had decided to throw a raucous party at being in such close, personal proximity to James.

He helped her sit on one of the slats across the boat and turned back to the pier.

“Cheers, mate,” he said, tossing up a small gold coin up to the sailor.

The man nodded and wandered away, and James faced Lily again.

“All right, Smith. Let’s go.”

\--

Sirius hauled her over the rail of the ship with more force than was strictly necessary, then shoved her at Dorcas, who gleefully grabbed onto Lily’s irons.

They wore matching victorious smirks, and Lily’s mind went momentarily blank at the horrid realization that she was back on this cursed ship with both of them.

James climbed over the rail while Peter secured the rowboat to the ship.

“Looking very impressive, Captain Potter,” Marlene said, waggling her eyebrows at James.

He grinned at her and pulled his wand out of his pocket. A few swishes later and his clothes had reverted to normal.

“Show off,” Sirius muttered.

James clapped him on the shoulder. “You’re looking well.”

“No thanks to her.”

“Yeah, well, no retaliation, got it?”

“Prongs.”

“We’ll discuss this later, all right? After we’ve interrogated her.” James beckoned Dorcas, and Lily stumbled at her push, falling into James’s arms. “Marlene, join us in a minute. Lily, come along.”

He frog-marched her into the library and forced her into a chair. She fidgeted, trying to get comfortable with her arms still awkwardly behind her. It was a losing battle.

Of course, under other circumstances, Lily wouldn’t have minded being tied up and at James’s mercy. Unfortunately he’d shown little interest in the more entertaining scenario her mind oh so helpfully provided.

He held onto her shoulder, keeping her in place, and moved to stand behind her. She flinched when he murmured a spell, and then relaxed when she felt the manacle fall away from one of her wrists.

But he didn’t release the other wrist. Instead she heard him shuffling behind her, the chains of the manacles clinking, and she turned her head to see him hold the loose cuff around the table leg. He murmured a few spells, one at the manacle to make it fit around the table leg, another at the wood with no effect that Lily could discern, and a final one to fuse the table leg together with the floor.

If Sirius tried to retaliate, she wouldn’t be able to stop him.

“I thought I’d bargained for my freedom on board,” she said, repressing the panic welling up in her throat.

“You escaped. That ended the parley, as far as I’m concerned.”

“Then I want a new parley.”

“And I’m refusing.”

“You can’t refuse. It’s parley.”

“Who are you going to complain to about it? Sirius? Dorcas? I think even Marlene might be a bit peeved at you. Yeah, you’re bloody impressive, all right. Bloody impressive at pissing people off.”

“I have the right to parley.”

“And I have the right to protect myself and my crew, and I can’t do that and give you parley. So, not sorry, you lose out in this scenario.” He glanced at the door. “I need to check in with my crew and then I’ll come back to deal with you. I don’t know—ah, McKinnon.”

Marlene strolled into the room looking very chipper. “Here to serve, Captain. I think you should’ve kept the other hat. Much more regal.”

“Search her, all right? Properly this time.”

“I searched her plenty well last time. If I’d searched her any more thoroughly I think I’d have had my second lesbian experience.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Regardless. Find everything this time, would you?”

“Aye aye, Captain.”

James snorted and left, shutting the door behind himself.

“So,” Marlene said, turning to Lily, “just us again, eh?”

Lily shrugged and looked away. If she opened her mouth, especially to Marlene, she might have done something stupid like confess how absolutely terrified she was. Marlene had been kind to her, but she wasn’t going to free her, that much was obvious.

Marlene was almost an ally. But not really, not when it mattered.

Marlene sighed. “I’ll let James do the interrogating. For now let’s see if we can’t get that dress off you without me slicing you open.”

_\--_

The shadows crept across the floor while Lily slumped in her chair. Marlene had thoroughly searched her and found all of her goods once more. She’d had the decency to give Lily a book from the shelf, though, and she’d extended the manacle chain so Lily could stand up and take a few steps away from the table.

But as best Lily could tell, she was well and thoroughly stuck in place.

Late in the afternoon, near dinnertime, she heard shouts through the closed windows, buoyant laughter, and someone running up and down the steps to the quarterdeck.

They were leaving Oporto.

Lily hadn’t managed to escape.

For the first time, icy despair washed over her. If they were headed for the Azores, it would take them a couple of weeks to arrive, weeks during which she might have nothing to do but sit around and hope someone deigned to give her a book.

Even if she could endure the passage to the Azores, she couldn’t begin to guess at how long they might be there searching for the treasure. If they decided to stay at sea while they puzzled over the map instead of taking port on one of the islands, Lily would have no chance of escape.

She’d tried her best to get away and it hadn’t worked. He’d still found her and bested her and now she was stuck on this bloody ship _again_ , maybe indefinitely, and some people on the ship wanted to _kill_ her, and now they might, actually, since she’d injured one of them.

She’d run and been clever and armed herself and it hadn’t mattered at all. Her feet ached from running around uneven streets and her hair was a disgusting mat from her swim and every weapon she’d collected had been ripped from her.

Hot tears flooded her eyes, and she fought back a sob. She folded her arms, her blasted chain clinking as it moved, and curled over the tabletop, resting her arms on the table and hanging her head. A few drops rolled off her cheeks, dropping onto the wood.

Crying always made her face flush and her nose stuff up and her chest ache. Sometimes crying helped, leaving her feeling grotty but empty when she was done, but this was different, more miserable: Hope hadn’t been this elusive, this distant, in years.

More tears spilled over as she wished for nothing more than to be back home, tucked up by the fire with her parents on either side of her, all of them reading while Petunia embroidered.

She never should have run away, never should have wandered onto James’s ship, never should have thought she could run away from well-trained witches and wizards.

But she had and there was no way out.

Someone knocked gently at the library door.

Lily swiped her palms over her eyes and sniffed. “Come in.”

Caradoc entered wearing one of his soft smiles, and carrying a tray full of steaming hot food.

“I thought after a long day of running you might be hungry,” he said, sliding the tray in front of her.

“Have I told you that I’m madly in love with you?”

He didn’t laugh, just broadened his smile a little, and sat down across from her. With a wave of his wand, he Conjured her a handkerchief, and she threw him a thankful look while she dabbed at her eyes.

“Sorry,” she said. “Don’t mind me.”

“It’s all right. It’s not surprising you’re feeling a little frustrated.”

“Frustrated’s only half of it,” she said, and then she closed her mouth. Caradoc was kind, yes, but he was also part of the crew that didn’t trust her, and the things she told him might end up back with James, or worse.

Still, he might not be a confidante at the moment, but he hadn’t had to serve her a proper meal.

“Really,” she said, “Thank you.”

He nodded. “You’re welcome.”

She took a bite of the fish he’d brought her. “What did you do with your day on land?”

“Oh, I ate at a nice restaurant, picked up a few trinkets. Nothing like your cutlass, though.”

“Funnily enough James saw fit to take that from me.”

“I’m surprised you bought one at all.”

“Why, should I have stolen it instead?”

“No,” he said, smiling, “because you’re a witch.”

“Oh. Right. Well, I had Sirius’s wand, but I’m—I don’t know many spells.”

“I suppose not.” His eyes lit up. “Sirius threw a fit over you taking his wand.”

Her mouth slanted into a grin. “Oh, I took it, all right. He went down awfully quick. I think his skull must be a bit thin.”

He didn’t verbally agree with her, but his smile widened just enough for her to notice. “Sirius can be difficult, sometimes.”

“So long as by sometimes you mean during any hour between one and twelve, then yes, sometimes he is difficult. Why you keep him around….”

“He and James have been best mates for a long time.”

“I noticed.”

“I suppose you did.” He pushed himself out of his seat. “I’ll leave you to it. Although you should know, per James’s instructions, that that knife doesn’t work against human skin.”

Lily blinked. “I didn’t—”

“I know,” he said, pushing in his chair. “I’m only following orders.”

\--

She sat alone again, thankfully tear-free but still morose, until James returned.

He’d never failed to ignite something in her, and she was terribly glad of it, if only to feel something other than depressed.

He leaned against the doorframe and sighed. “Where’s Sirius’s wand, Lily?”

“In the river,” she said airily.

“You’ve really got to stop lying.”

“I don’t see why.”

“Don’t you want to get off this ship?”

“If you’ve already forgotten,” she said, standing up and lifting her chin, her chain clinking, “I did get off your ship. But it’s clear to me that you’ve no intention of letting me go because for whatever mad reason you think I’d work for What’s His Face. That is it, isn’t it?”

“I would let you go if you’d just stop being so untrustworthy.”

“Oh, please. I’m not a saint but I’ve hardly been poisoning the food.”

“That’s the thing, though, Lily.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I know you were up to something.”

“It’s called trying to escape. It’s generally what captive people try to do when you lock them up. I’m happy to give you the long and glorious history if you like.”

“My crew told me you were leaving your bed at night. They tried to find you, but funnily enough, you were nowhere to be found.”

She’d never been gone for very long periods of time in the library, rarely more than half an hour at a time. But apparently that was long enough.

“Then why didn’t you say anything?” she said. “Or was it another trap?”

“It wasn’t a trap, I was giving you the opportunity to prove I could trust you.”

“I didn’t violate your trust. I didn’t do anything but sit by myself when I left bed,” she said, which was technically true.

“You could’ve done that without hiding—however it is you’re hiding, that is, I still don’t know—but how can I think you weren’t scheming when you didn’t want us to know what you were doing?”

She didn’t have a ready lie for that question, and if they were angry with her now, telling them that she’d been planning to sell information about the treasure they were after certainly wasn’t going to help her position.

“So you’re just going to hang onto me indefinitely,” she said.

“No, I’ve actually found a solution.”

“Which is?”

He reached into his vest and pulled out a small vial with a few drops of clear liquid inside. “Veritaserum. It’ll solve the question of your background once and for all.”

“Yes, but….”

She had acted deceptively, and she had very little important information to hide, besides her intent to sell information about the treasure. But if he was offering her the chance to prove that she was who she said she was, and if that would mean her freedom, she’d suffer through it. At least they’d know she was only planning to steal information from them, and not sabotage them entirely.

“All right,” she said.

“Take that again?”

“Give it to me. I’ve got nothing to hide.”

“You’re awfully eager to tell the truth now that I’ve taken the option away from you.”

“Look, obviously given the choice, I would prefer not to be on board. You lot are going—well, wherever you’re going that’s so secret. I want to be anywhere else. You think this potion will make you trust me? Give it to me and take me back to Oporto.”

“Did I mention you’re a pain in the arse?”

“I don’t do what you want, I’m a pain in the arse. I offer to cooperate, I’m still a pain in the arse. You’re clearly the pain in the arse among the two of us.”

“You’ll have to tell me where Sirius’s wand is.”

“You think I’m petty enough to pick annoying him over getting off your bloody ship?”

He pushed off the door with his shoulder. “I suppose.”

Lily swallowed, ready to drink the potion, but he walked right past her. “Aren’t you going to dose me?”

He wearily turned around. “Honestly, I’m about half asleep. You can prove yourself to me in the morning.”

“I don’t see why you’re exhausted. I’m the one who did most of the work today.”

“Trust me, I did plenty of walking myself.” He yawned and headed for his cabin. “Good night.”

“Not even a pillow?”

He opened the door to his room and Algernon sprang out, making an annoyed sound.

“Hey, there,” James said, in a low, soothing voice.

But Algernon raced past him and over to Lily to wind his way around her shins. She reached down to stroke his back.

James leaned against his doorframe, barely keeping himself upright. “So much treachery today,” he sighed.

“Go on, then,” she told Algernon quietly. “He needs you.”

Algernon meowed, but trotted over to James and followed him into his cabin. Lily almost gave up hope of a pillow, but then James reappeared and threw one at her with surprising accuracy. She couldn’t catch it one-handed, though, and had to settle for blocking it from hitting her face.

“Thanks,” she called, but he was shutting the door and she wasn’t sure he heard her.

Sleeping on the floor was never pleasant, but the promise of pending freedom carried her off to sleep.

\--

She awoke from her light doze with a start.

Someone was slowly turning the door handle from the main deck.

She didn’t have weapons, save her body and the chairs, but she could shout for James. Annoyed as he was with her for escaping, he wouldn’t let Sirius or Dorcas hurt her.

She quickly climbed into a crouch, moving her chained hand as little as possible.

The door opened one centimeter at a time, and Lily froze, unable to move without rattling her chains. She could hear the faint creak of wood under the person’s feet, and the crashing of the waves against the ship in the distance.

Someone’s shoulder slid through the gap in the door, followed by a head.

A head she didn’t recognize.

The woman’s face was turned back toward the deck as she slipped through the door, and Lily’s body thrummed with tension. She cursed James for taking away her cutlass and leaving her unarmed when there were, apparently, other people trying to sneak onto his ship.

She would have to face this woman, though. In a second she’d see Lily and—

The woman’s face turned in toward the library.

The clouds obscuring the moon made it impossible for Lily to make out her expression in great detail, but the little light that trickled in from the doorway revealed a thin face, mouth hung open a little in shock.

She and Lily stood, eyes locked on each other, for a tense moment.

And then they moved.

In the second it took the woman to step fully inside the room and raise her wand hand, Lily picked up the chair next to her. The woman was out of arm’s reach, but not by much.

While Lily was in the process of swinging the chair at her head, Lily saw the woman’s wand twitch and heard her utter a spell. Lily couldn’t duck mid-swing, though, and she felt something rip along her side, a sharp, glancing blow that forced a gasp out of her.

Casting the spell cost the woman the second Lily needed: The woman’s wand arm came up too late to properly stop the chair from banging into her head. Lily felt the reverberations as the legs connected with the woman’s arm and head – not hard enough to knock her out, but enough to hurt her, at least a little.

“James!” Lily shouted.

The woman had recovered from her blow, swearing under her breath, and raised up her wand again. She shot off another spell and Lily dropped into a crouch.

But the spell went in another direction, flying over Lily’s head.

Someone else cast a spell, and a flash of white light hurtled toward the woman from behind Lily, who turned to see the caster through the legs of the table.

James, of course, standing tall in his doorway.

Lily whipped her head back to the stranger, who’d pointed her wand at Lily again.

“I’ll kill her,” the woman said calmly.

“Then I’ll kill you,” James said. “Eye for an eye, and all that.”

The stranger was watching James, apparently deeming Lily a non-threat.

Lily flicked her eyes around, trying to find another weapon. But she didn’t need a weapon. She was close enough.

She shot her arm out, making a swipe for the woman’s wand, but the woman was quicker. She fired off another spell at Lily, whose limbs stopped responding to her commands, her body immobilized in place with her hand outstretched.

Her face was frozen looking up at the woman, allowing her to see a red jet of light clip the stranger’s shoulder. Lily caught the brief look of anger on her face before the woman collapsed in a heap on the ground, her wand rolling out of her hand and across the floor.

James had begun running toward the woman before she’d even hit the ground. When he reached her, ropes flew out from his wand to slither around her, binding her arms to her sides and her legs together.

Severus had told Lily about the jinx she suspected she was under, but he’d neglected to tell her how excruciatingly frustrating it was, how utterly helpless she felt sitting there unable to move. Now that the danger had passed, the slice along her side throbbed, but she couldn’t do anything about it.

James bent down to grab the woman’s wand where it had fallen, and then finally he turned to Lily. With a wave of his wand, her body relaxed, and she toppled backwards, her head whacking against the table.

“Shit,” she said, sitting up and rubbing her scalp. No blood, from the feel of it, but it would probably bruise.

James let out a short laugh. “Couldn’t have put it better myself.” He stepped over the tied-up woman, pushed the library door all the way open, and stuck his head out to the main deck. He whistled twice and moved back inside to look at the stranger.

Lily stayed sitting on the ground, leaning back against the table, one hand pressed against her side. Her eyes stayed riveted on the fallen stranger, her heartbeat a sharp staccato, her body prepared for its attacker to rise up again at any moment.

Footsteps thudded on the main deck. Sirius appeared in the doorway, with Dorcas’s head peeking out beside his shoulder. He stepped over the body, the candle in his hand illuminating the dark look on his face.

“Is this one of your mates?” he demanded of Lily.

“What’s going on?” Marlene said, who’d joined Dorcas in the doorway. “Who’s that?”

“I don’t know,” Lily said impatiently. “She walked into the library—”

“And Lily hit her with a chair,” James said approvingly. “And then I Stupefied her.”

Marlene moved around Dorcas to get a better look at the woman’s face. “Where did she come from?”

Sirius turned on Marlene. “A bloody good question, McKinnon. Why didn’t you see her going into the library?”

Marlene stood up and took a step backwards, running into Dorcas, who grumbled. “Er, that is…I may have…not been entirely awake.”

“Marlene,” said James, his voice low and dangerous. “Tell me you didn’t fall asleep on watch.”

“I’m _sorry_ , all right? Obviously it was an accident! I was trying to stay awake but with our shifts all messed up from Oporto—”

“We’ll talk about it later,” he snapped. “And as for you two – Sirius and Dorcas, how did you not notice her sneaking around?”

“We were in the common room,” Sirius said dismissively. “A chair broke and Dorcas was fixing it.”

James was too busy looking at Sirius to catch Marlene’s enormous eyeroll.

“Shit, Sirius, you couldn’t have fixed it yourself?” James paced toward his bedroom door. “Dorcas, you were supposed to be on duty, not faffing about in the common room.”

“Wasn’t faffing,” she muttered, arms folded.

“Merlin, you lot.” James angrily ruffled his hair with one hand. “Can’t believe none of you noticed she was on board.”

“She must’ve snuck on after _she_ ,” Sirius said, jerking his head down toward Lily, “saw fit to bludgeon me. Which is probably why she ran, to get you off the ship so this one could get on board.”

“ _What_?” Lily made to stand up, but her wound gaped, and she winced. “I left because I wanted to get away from you lot!”

“Oh, it was just coincidence that there was some witch hanging about in Oporto waiting to sneak on our ship? She had to have known we were coming.”

“Did you check for a mark?” Dorcas asked James.

He shook his head, and she bent down to pull up the woman’s sleeve.

In the faint light from Sirius’s candle, Lily could see a stark black inking on the inner part of her forearm, a grotesque skull with a snake coming through the mouth.

James sighed. “I’m going to call Mad-Eye.”

“You’ve got a friend called _Mad-Eye_?” Lily said, feeling a bit giddy. She pressed her hand down tighter on her side, which was sopping wet with something sticky, now that she thought about it. “Does he wear an eye patch, too?”

“Yes,” Marlene said, and she sounded weird as she took a step toward Lily, “but the more noticeable thing is his peg leg.”

“Pirates,” Lily sighed. She leaned her head back against the table, mind drifting, imagining James with a peg leg to match his eye-patched cat. She laughed a little, and her mind tipped away from consciousness. “So predictable,” she murmured, and she was lost.


	10. Still Not a Saboteur, Redux

Lily groaned and rolled onto her side, hand drifting up to press against where she’d been injured. Her fingers settled on the unmistakable texture of gauze.

Sunlight streamed through the ladder hole leading up to the main deck, and she started to sit up, but winced and lay back down.

“Morning!” Marlene said from the spare bed next to Lily. She stood up, setting a piece of parchment on the cannon between them, and walked around to kneel by Lily. “Can I look?”

Lily’s dress—or rather, Marlene’s dress—had vanished, leaving only a blanket covering Lily.

Lily glanced around the room and, not seeing anyone else awake, nodded. Marlene pulled the blanket down Lily’s torso, revealing a large piece of gauze stuck to the left side of Lily’s abdomen. She gently peeled it off, drawing a hiss out of Lily, and set it aside.

“I’d be angry that my dress got ruined,” Marlene said, brushing a finger over the sharp pink scar that ran along Lily’s side, “but at least you tried to get revenge on the woman who did it.”

“I hit her with a chair,” Lily said, mostly to herself. “And she cast a spell at me.”

“Yeah, nasty Slicing Hex there, but that’s a nice clean cut, easy to take care of. The blood loss is what got you, though, and the shock. Drink this.” Marlene offered her a vial out of her pocket.

Lily downed the potion, grimacing at the taste, and handed the vial back.

Marlene wandered over to her bed to dispose of it. The slight breeze from her walk knocked the letter balanced on the cannon askew, and it fluttered on top of Lily.

“I’ve left a few more potions with Caradoc that you should take when you eat breakfast,” Marlene said.

Lily glanced at the messy writing covering the parchment, but moved it aside without reading it. Instead her fingers trailed along her scar, the skin slightly puckered, but cleaner than it ever would have healed naturally. “Thanks for fixing me up.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Marlene rummaged through her trunk. “Mind, I’m not touching that Death Eater. She’s got a nasty bruise from where you whacked her, but she can deal with it.”

“Is that what her inking meant?”

“Yeah, that’s You Know Who’s mark. Puts it on people who’ve proven themselves to him.”

“I don’t have one.”

“We did notice, actually.” Marlene walked back over with a small jar in hand. “But that’s not proof of much. Oh, sorry about that.” She knelt down next to Lily and tucked the letter in her back pocket, smiling. “My brother wrote me some letters before we left – a new one opens up every week. Your scar doesn’t hurt too badly, does it?”

Lily shook her head, and Marlene began smoothing a thick layer of paste onto Lily’s scar.

“So, do you think…” Lily said. “Do you think I wanted that woman to get on board?”

“Do I?” Marlene snorted. “No. Does James? Probably not. Sirius and Dorcas—ugh, the two of them together.”

“Well, then it’s all back to the way it was before I left, then. Lovely.”

“Except now we’ve got a real Death Eater to interrogate.”

“I’m surprised I’m not still in irons.”

“James said to take them off, and I wasn’t going to argue.”

“Bet Sirius did, though.”

Marlene leaned in, inspecting Lily’s wound, and sat back looking satisfied. “If we were still in Hogwarts, James might’ve listened to him, but these days…. Well, I think James is coming around to you.”

“Because I got sliced open?”

“Because you hit that woman with a chair.” Marlene placed fresh gauze over the paste and drew Lily’s blanket back up.

“If I’d known hitting someone with a chair would’ve got him to trust me, I would’ve whacked Dorcas on day one.”

“She wouldn’t have let you get that far,” James called from the ladder to the main deck. He let go and hopped down, skipping the last few rungs.

“It’s okay,” Marlene told Lily, “Dorcas has got a Deafening Charm on her right now.”

James stopped at the foot of Lily’s bed and smiled. “You’re looking much better.”

Lily raised an eyebrow. “Not bleeding all over everything is my best look.”

“Can she come up to my cabin?” James asked Marlene. “I think we need to talk.”

Marlene shrugged. “Whatever Lily wants.”

“I can come,” Lily said, even though lying curled up in a ball in bed sounded infinitely more appealing. “I just need clothing, preferably.”

“Don’t get dressed on my account,” James said, “but I’ll be waiting upstairs either way.”

Lily managed to stand up all right, but Marlene had to help Lily with her undergarments and trousers, and Lily’s side twinged when she stretched her arms up to pull on a shirt. Considering the size of her scar, though, there was remarkably little pain.

Properly attired, Lily slowly climbed the ladder. Moving her arms stretched out her side, enough to pull at her new skin, but she pressed on and pulled herself up to sit on the edge of the hole.

She paused for a moment to catch her breath, and that was probably a mistake, she realized, when the full force of the previous night’s events washed over her.

She’d been attacked. She’d passed out from blood loss. She could have died, if it hadn’t been for Marlene.

She’d thought, rather foolishly, that she’d reached her nadir when Caradoc had found her crying, but things could always get worse, and they had.

The Death Eater’s shadowed face loomed in Lily’s mind, and Lily swallowed hard. It was difficult to believe, with the sun shining brightly overhead, that she’d been in such dire straits only the night before. If it hadn’t been for James—well, if it hadn’t been for James, she wouldn’t have been in that situation at all, but he’d still kept the Death Eater from killing her.

Her eyes prickled, but she hurriedly swiped her palms over them and climbed to her feet, her wound twinging. She could cry later, when she was alone, and then move her limbs simply because she had that freedom and she’d never fully appreciated that before, but right now she had to get James to give her Veritaserum so she could leave his bloody ship and get out of danger altogether.

Except.

She was no longer the biggest threat on the ship. Lily wasn’t familiar with how much Veritaserum was needed to properly dose someone, but James hadn’t had very much in that vial. It might have been enough for only one person.

It didn’t take very long to play out the possibilities of how the Veritaserum could be used.

Lily nearly did cry at her conclusions, but she took a deep breath and marched through the library anyway. There was no use throwing a fit over things that couldn’t be changed.

When she crossed the threshold, Algernon jumped out of James’s lap and bounded over to her.

“I’d pet you,” she said, “but I can’t really reach down right now.”

“He understands.” James stood up from his alcoved bench next to the window, his eyes skimming from her head to her feet. “Er, why don’t you lay down and I’ll pull up a chair.”

He tugged his blankets and pillows into a rough semblance of order and stepped aside with one arm spread to welcome her forward. She gingerly lowered herself onto his bed, smiling when Algernon hopped up next to her. He curled up in a ball by her side, and she stroked his ears, his head lolling back, pleased.

“How are you feeling?” James asked.

Pained, frustrated, desperate, lonely, confused.

“Fine,” she said, her throat tight.

He folded his arms over his chest. “Good. That’s…good.”

Lily contented herself with petting Algernon while James paced back and forth next to her.

He stopped mid-step and sharply pivoted back toward her. “I’m sorry you got hurt. I mean, obviously I didn’t know she was on board or I wouldn’t have left you alone, but I’m still…sorry.”

She forced a smile. “I’m fine. Really.”

“I forget—I forget sometimes what this is like for you. You’re not a member of my crew, and I—I should’ve asked if you were all right, but everyone else on this ship would never hesitate to report their injuries, and I forgot you don’t know those protocols—”

“I was in shock,” Lily said, with an air of finality. “I didn’t even really know what she’d done.”

“We should’ve treated you immediately—”

“Trust me, Marlene worked wonders.” She glanced around the room, avoiding James’s eyes. “Where’s the Death Eater now?”

“Down in the magazine.” James dragged a chair over from his table, the legs scraping against the wooden floor, and sat backwards on it, one hand absently ruffling his hair. “Restrained, warded. You don’t need to worry about her.”

And even though she knew where bringing it up would take her, she asked, “What did you want to talk about? I mean, since you’ve got to use the Veritaserum on your new prisoner instead of on me.”

He gave her a wry smile. “So certain, are you?”

“It’s only logical. There’s no question that she’s a threat. But if I am what I say I am, some random Muggle-born, then you gain nothing from interrogating me.”

“But if you were a saboteur, you’d have more information. She was sent in with a strong likelihood of getting caught – you were supposed to worm your way into the crew.”

“If I were a saboteur, that could be true, yes. But if I’m not—and for the hundredth time, I’m _not_ —then you’ve wasted your opportunity.” She tried to sit up, but gave up when the motion wrenched at her scar. “Do you think this woman would have hesitated to kill you, or your crew?”

“Definitely not.”

“And what’ve I done? I roughed up Sirius, and that—I needed you to come out onto the deck, and you know how he is, and—my point is, I didn’t kill you, or even really hurt Sirius too much. I didn’t do anything to you, but I could have. You know I could have.”

He tapped his fingers along his forearm and stood up to pace again. “Why did you need me to come out onto the deck? Don’t tell me you missed me.”

“I wanted my things back.”

“What, your hairpin and a bit of money? Although—you must’ve had the hairpin, unless you found some other way out of the magazine….”

Lily looked down at Algernon. “Some of the items have sentimental value.”

James stopped in front of the windows, his hands behind his back. He didn’t say anything for a moment, just stood there with his head tilted.

“What did you hit Sirius with, anyway?” he asked.

“A cannonball.”

He laughed, sharp and hollow, and resumed his pacing. “I suppose we’ve plenty of those lying around.”

“Please tell me you’re not going to waste your Veritaserum on me. You can’t risk your crew’s safety like that. Or yours.”

He regarded her strangely.

“Look,” she continued. “I don’t _have_ real secrets, James. My surname, probably, and that’s it. You’re a pirate – always on the hunt for a new opportunity, right? Surely you can see you’ve got better opportunities with that woman than with me.”

James stopped near the end of the bed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “And there it is,” he said, readjusting his glasses. “How can you—I’m not—we’ve got a problem, you know.”

“Obviously. God knows why, but for some reason What’s His Face has sent his Death Eaters after a bunch of pirates. I assume you stole from him?”

He gave an exasperated sigh and swung the chair around to sit in it properly. “All right, Lily. I need to ask you: do we _look_ like pirates?”

“I don’t think anyone _looks_ like a pirate unless they have a peg leg and a talking parrot. I assumed you traded out the parrot for a cat.”

“Algernon’s only on board because he insisted,” James corrected. “But no. That’s not…. What makes you think I’m a pirate?”

“You told me as much.”

“But before that. Before you came on my ship.”

“Oh. I saw a wanted poster, in Brighton. It had your face on it, said you were wanted for piracy.”

Comprehension dawned on James’s face. “ _Those_ things. And here I’d laughed them off.”

“What?”

He strode across the room, flipped through some parchments in a desk drawer, and brought one back to Lily. “I kept one for myself,” he said, holding it out. “Thought it was funny, really.”

She took the poster and glanced over it. “Why would being wanted for piracy be funny?” She handed it back to him, and he set it on the table behind him. “People are hanged for that.”

James shrugged and sat down. “It’s just You Know Who trying to find me. They’re not—we’re not pirates, Lily.”

“That sounds like something a pirate would say.”

He raised his eyebrows.

He could deadpan with the best of them, but he didn’t—

He wasn’t joking.

Oh, the _bastard_.

Lily bolted upright in his bed, ignoring the spike of pain in her side. “I _parleyed_ with you.”

“And?”

She whipped his pillow at his head, but he caught it with both hands. “You complete and utter _arse_.”

“ _You_ tried to steal from _me_.” He let the pillow drop onto the ground.

“Because I thought you were pirates!”

“Well, we’re not. You Know Who put those up because—he didn’t like what I was doing.”

The worst part was, even though James had lied to her, it wouldn’t have mattered. She’d snuck on board and initially acted without him lying to her. That was all on her.

Her whole predicament would have happened regardless of James’s lie.

She huffed. “This is ridiculous. I can’t imagine why What’s His Face would care about you.”

“Oi, I’m a proper threat to him, I’ll have you know.”

“Well, clearly I’ve got the wrong end of the stick about What’s His Face, if he’s terrified of a boy with a ship.”

“You think so little of me, do you?”

“Why shouldn’t I? You’re—” A pirate, she’d been about to say, but that wasn’t true, as it turned out. “You’ve given me no reason to think better of you.”

“You were perfectly willing to believe I was enough of a threat to the Royal Navy to have a wanted poster, but now you don’t think I can scare the pants off of You Know Who?”

“Exactly.”

“Well, fair enough, I’m sure he’s not _personally_ terrified of me. His pants are likely well in place. But he doesn’t like what I’ve done, or what I could do.”

“Like what, talk his cats into betraying him?”

He laughed and shook his head. “No, nothing like that. What, you think I’ve been mucking about the last two years, letting him have everything without a fight?”

“What else was I supposed to think? You told me you were a _pirate_.”

A smile played at the corners of his lips. “You really believed me, didn’t you?”

“Strangely, I don’t usually doubt people who claim to be pirates. And besides, your cat had an eye patch. I’d seen your poster. Why shouldn’t I have thought you were a pirate?”

“I’m glad I was so believable.”

She scoffed. “Of the two of us, _you’re_ the one who’s been lying about who he is..”

Algernon stepped across her stomach, paws delicately avoiding her wound, and hopped off the bed to sit next to James.

“It was for your protection,” James said. “If we let you go right away, I thought it would be better for everyone if you didn’t actually know who we were. If you just thought you’d met some magical pirates, no one would try to interrogate you about what you’d seen and heard on board, and you wouldn’t be—hurt.”

“I’d say that’s paranoid but then I’ve got a lovely new scar.”

“Right. So. I thought it made sense.”

“Of course you did. You’re a lunatic.”

He laughed, short and quiet. “I suppose I can take that eye patch off now, Algernon. Your part in my ruse is over.”

He gently pried the eye patch off, and Algernon shook his head, blinking profusely, and leaped back onto the bed with Lily.

“That was just for show?” Lily asked.

“Well, I thought it was funny. And he’d just annoyed me, and then I didn’t want to break the ruse, so….”

“I can’t believe you made your cat wander around with one eye for more than a week just to convince me you were a pirate.”

“I’m a very committed person, especially to ruses,” he said solemnly. “But there’s no need for it anymore.”

“Does that mean you believe me when I say who I am now? Did my chair bashing and gullibility convince you?”

He nodded, standing up to pace again. “The final spell in the ward. I wouldn’t—that wouldn't be my first thought, using a chair. And after seeing how you escaped yesterday….”

“Running away made you think I was Muggle-born?”

“No, that’s to be expected, like you said. But you didn’t take off my Tracking Charm, even though you had a wand.”

“I didn’t—when did you cast that on me?”

He turned back to her and frowned. “When you were in the water.”

“The spell hit the water, I thought.”

“Well, it did, but that doesn’t stop the spell. It’s not a wall. Light can move through water, at least if it’s really shallow.”

“Oh,” Lily said sourly. “So I could’ve run all day and you would’ve found me.”

“That’s exactly what happened, if you recall. I lost my whole day in Oporto following you.”

“If you’re expecting an apology, I hear they’ll be all the rage two centuries from now.”

He almost smiled, but not quite. “Thought as much.”

At least her escape attempt had had some benefit. He believed her now, finally. That was something. Too bad it wouldn’t get her on land anytime soon.

“But I’m afraid,” he said, “that I can’t really fulfill the terms of our parley for a while. It’ll be another month on board at least. We’ve got business to take care of before I can take you back to Portugal.”

If Lily hadn’t already concluded that herself before entering his cabin, she might’ve been outraged, or at least annoyed. Instead she bit back a sigh. The thought of a month on James’s ship wouldn’t have stung nearly as much if she hadn’t thrown herself at him two days earlier, or if he hadn’t looked so damned apologetic over having to keep her around. He’d wanted her on board, once, and spending weeks with him, knowing he wasn’t interested….

But a month wasn’t forever, she told herself, in a pitiful attempt to cheer herself up. She could read for a couple weeks and try to get other passage out of the Azores.

He was still watching her for a response, so she nodded, not looking at him.

“You feeling all right?” he asked.

“Marlene has some potions for me somewhere,” she said vaguely.

“Then you should go take them. I’ve got to prepare to interrogate our prisoner.”

Algernon headbutted Lily’s chest when she sat up, and she stroked the softer fur on his head.

“I think you would’ve protected me last night if you could have,” she told Algernon.

He let out a long, low purr.

Lily laughed, and caught James smiling at her, pleased and affectionate. He might’ve turned her down the other night, and she’d been stupid over men before, but she wasn’t imagining the way he looked at her.

Maybe the weeks ahead wouldn’t be so awful, if he believed her, and smiled at her.

She memorized the tilt of his mouth like that, and left him with Algernon in his cabin.

\--

She managed to cross the library and the deck without too much pain, and found Marlene in the common room enjoying a late breakfast.

Lily sat down across the table from her. “You _liar_.”

“Hrm?” Marlene said, mouth full of bread.

“You’re not pirates at all.”

Marlene swallowed her food and exhaled deeply. “Oh, thank Merlin that’s over.”

“Why did you go along with that stupid farce? I expect that sort of thing from James, now, but the rest of you….”

Marlene shrugged. “He figured you calling us pirates was a ruse, in which case he thought it’d be fun to play along, or he thought you really believed it, in which case he thought it’d be fun to play along.”

“And you said all right, let’s do it?”

“Well. Sirius and Remus persuaded us it would be a good idea.”

“Sirius I can see, but Remus?”

“James—” Marlene’s eyes flicked toward the door. “He’s had a hard time of it lately, and he hasn’t—he hasn’t been himself. When he said he wanted to play at pirates—we couldn’t say no. That’s something the old James would have done, at Hogwarts.”

“And you lot would do anything for him.”

“Because he’d do anything for us. I mean, with Remus on the full moon, he and the others—well, that’s James’s secret.”

“He told me they do spells in there.”

“Right. Well, there’s that, and then…. We were partnered together in Arithmancy one term. I was really upset one day because the professor had said something about our essay – he didn’t mean it to be cruel, but I took it a bit hard, and James charmed his chair to buck him out of it whenever he tried to sit down. He’s just—he’s our captain. We agreed to that when we signed on, to listen to him, and we do. Sirius less than others, but that’s them, though.”

“Still don’t know why you all had to lie to me,” Lily muttered.

“Lily,” Marlene said sternly, “you are _not_ allowed to be angry with me for lying when you did nothing but lie to me when we first met.”

“That was because—I thought you were pirates, and I didn’t—that’s just what I do, Marlene.”

Marlene gave her one last sharp look, and then relented. “I don’t like what you do, but I still thought you seemed nice. I thought it was strange, that someone so nice would be doing that.”

“Life’s a funny thing.” Lily gave her a rueful smile. “But thanks for not holding that against me. I really haven’t lied to you since.”

“I did take all your belongings?”

“Yes. James is just crap at security.”

“Oh, please tell him that. _Please_. As a favor to your friend, Marlene, who really needs to put James in his place after last night.”

“What happened last night wasn’t your fault.”

“Well, not entirely. Dorcas should have been out there working, but she was—” Marlene stopped herself and looked down at her plate.

“You don’t think….”

“I’m not saying anything.”

“But Sirius was—he wouldn’t need help fixing a broken _chair_ —”

“Not a _word_.”

Lily slanted a smile at her. “Yes, Healer.”

The door swung open and Remus’s head poked through, looking a bit ill. “We’re going to interrogate the Death Eater. Marlene, can you take care of the tacking for a bit?”

“Of course!”

“You’re wonderful. Thank you. Lily, I’m terribly sorry to hear about you getting attacked by Death Eaters.”

“I’m terribly sorry to hear that you lot have been _pretending_ to be pirates.”

“Ah. Yes. Are we finally done with that ruse, then?”

“Fortunately, yes.”

“That’s how I prefer it. Well, rest up.”

“Planning on it.”

Remus ducked out of the door, closing it behind him.

Marlene slid her chair back. “That’s me, then.”

Lily followed her out of the common room while Marlene went on about how asinine it was to pretend to be pirates, but she hesitated by the ladder to the gun deck.

Marlene kept walking, pausing only when she saw Lily wasn’t next to her anymore. “Oh, right, you should sleep,” she said. “But first go find Caradoc and get some breakfast and potions in you.”

“Right,” Lily said absently. “D’you think they’d let me watch the interrogation?”

“Why would you….I mean, I dunno.”

“Curiosity.”

“Probably not. They’ve got—you don’t know everything yet, I don’t think.”

“No,” Lily sighed. “It’s really apparent that I don’t.”

\--

Lily had fallen into a light doze, her empty plate at the foot of her bed, when she heard someone climbing up from the orlop deck.

She sat up, wincing, and saw James storming down toward her. He was halfway across the deck before Sirius’s head popped up through the ladder hole.

“James,” Sirius called. “Prongs.”

James whirled around, his arms stiff at his sides, his fists clenched. “Fuck!”

“Hold on, all right?” Sirius climbed off the ladder.

“Is everything okay?” Lily asked.

Remus came up behind Sirius, and they both walked toward James like they were approaching a wild animal.

“James,” Remus said soothingly, “that’s all she knows.”

James’s hand tore through his hair as he paced back and forth. Lily tried to catch Remus’s eye for some explanation, but he was entirely focused on James.

“That’s what they said would be useful,” Remus continued. “It might very well be – we don’t have enough information to judge the value—”

James spun to the side and viciously kicked one of the cannons, his boot connecting with a dull clang. “ _Shit_!”

Sirius reached out to steady James’s shoulder as he hopped on one foot. “Idiot.”

“I’ll go get Marlene,” Remus sighed. He made for the ladder to the main deck while Sirius helped lower James onto the spare bed across from Lily.

James gingerly stretched out his leg and grimaced. “All right, in hindsight, I’m willing to concede I shouldn’t have kicked that cannon.”

Sirius stood back and folded his arms. “And next you’ll learn that things don’t stop existing once they’re out of sight. Well done, indeed, Captain Potter.”

“What happened?” Lily ventured.

Sirius didn’t even look at her. “Stay out of it.”

“Fuck, Sirius, would you let up already?” James said. “She’s not a bloody Death Eater.”

“You don’t know that.”

“And you don’t know she is, so shut it.”

“Wasted our Veritaserum,” Sirius muttered, with a sharp glance at Lily. “Knew we shouldn’t have used it on that one.”

“Ask me anything, Sirius,” Lily said savagely. “What are you so desperate to know about me? Am I that threatening? My inability to know if someone’s cast a spell on me? Real danger, that. Or maybe you’re just sore that I beat you.”

“That wasn’t a fair fight.”

“If I understand things correctly, you should be used to that.”

Sirius’s gaze dropped back to James. “What did you tell her?”

James was cradling his toe and pointedly didn’t look up.

“Oh, for God’s sake, Sirius,” Lily said. “He barely told me anything. None of you do – I’m an open book compared to the rest of you.”

Marlene almost slid down the ladder from the main deck and hurried over to kneel in front of James. “James _Potter_ , stop hurting yourself!”

By now James’s face had taken a turn toward green. Lily watched him curiously – he hadn’t kicked his foot _that_ hard.

“Let me just—” Marlene pulled out her wand and murmured a spell against his shoe. “Nothing serious, at least. Give me a moment. You might want to lie down for this, and hold onto something.”

James nodded, the lines in his throat bobbing as he swallowed. Marlene eased his shoe off, and he let out a long, thin hiss.

“Such a baby,” she muttered, and cast a line of blue light at his foot.

James swore under his breath.

“That’s it.” Marlene stood up. “I’ve got to take care of some things Dorcas asked me to do before she wakes up.”

“In a minute,” he said, climbing to his feet. He stepped delicately on his newly Healed foot, and then again with his full weight. “I need to see you in my cabin.”

“Oh,” Marlene said, voice sinking. “Right. ‘Course.”

“It won’t take long. Come on.”

Marlene sullenly followed him to the ladder and climbed up after him.

Sirius seemed stuck in place, a strange look on his face.

“You’d make an excellent pirate,” Lily told him. “You’re certainly ruthless enough.”

He snapped out of his daze and threw her a disdainful look. “You’d know better than I.”

Lily opened her mouth to reply, but he simply turned and strode over to the ladder. He wasn’t halfway up before Lily was on her feet.

Whatever potion Marlene had given her with breakfast had worked wonders – her side ached half as much as it had when she’d first woken up. She still took her time on the ladder, but soon enough she joined Sirius and Remus in the library.

Sirius glared at her. “You’re not welcome here.”

“Fuck off,” Lily said easily, and lowered herself into a seat at the table.

“I don’t think he’ll be too hard on her,” Remus said. “It’s partially my fault the shift schedule got so irregular—”

Sirius spun toward Remus. “Not another word. It’s not your fault in any way.”

“I didn’t think until now—could the Death Eater have cast a spell on Marlene?”

“How could the Death Eater have cast it unless Marlene wasn’t watching?”

Remus sighed and leaned his elbows on the table.

“What are you going to do with…the woman below deck?” Lily asked.

“It’s up to James,” Remus said, “and, well—other people.”

James slipped out from his cabin with his mouth fixed in a grim line. He sank down into the chair next to Remus and propped his head up with one hand threaded through his hair.

“Death Eaters got Marlene’s family,” James said in a low voice. “All of them.”

Remus’s head snapped up toward the door to James’s cabin, as though he could see her through the wall. “Marlene,” he said softly, although he didn’t seem aware that he’d spoken.

Sirius blinked. “Fuck.”

Lily’s vision went a bit blurry as a few tears sprung up, and she blinked them away. “Shit,” she said, because there was nothing else to say.

“Mad-Eye told me earlier,” James said miserably, “and I thought—I thought our Death Eater might know something—but she had nothing— _fuck_.” He sat up and banged a fist on the table.

No one seemed quite sure what else to do, or say. There was nothing that could make Marlene feel better, nothing that could ease the sudden, wrenching transition to being an orphan.

Lily’s heart ached for Marlene, sharp and raw.

“Remus,” James said quietly. “I can’t help but notice you’re still here.”

“Yes. I am.”

They shared a brief look that Lily couldn’t interpret.

“Right,” James sighed. “Of course. Well, in that case, you should go in, Lily.”

“Sorry, what?”

“Go in there. She likes you.”

“I—I just met her.”

“She needs _someone_. You think I should send in Dorcas?”

Lily nearly laughed at the flabbergasted version of Dorcas that appeared in her head when asked to comfort someone.

“Men,” she said under her breath, and marched over to knock gently on the door. “Marlene?”

No one answered.

“Marlene, it’s Lily. Can I come in?”

But still Marlene said nothing. No sounds penetrated the door, not even Algernon’s meowing. Lily tried the handle, but it didn’t budge.

“Did you lock it?” she asked James.

“No,” James said slowly. He joined her at the door and wiggled the handle. “She’s locked us out?”

Lily squeezed her eyes shut, pushing back the hint of tears that had prickled up. “She shouldn’t have to be alone in there.”

“But that’s what she wants,” Remus said.

Lily stared at the dark door blocking Marlene off from her friends for a long moment, then reluctantly sat back down at the table, feeling horrendously hollow.

“Well,” James said, sinking back into a chair, “that can’t be good.”


	11. Last Rites

** Part III **

“Hope has two beautiful daughters. Their names are anger and courage; anger at the way things are, and courage to see that they do not remain the way they are.”

—St. Augustine

\--

They could have broken through, if they’d wanted, but no one tried. Instead they sat around the library table, each on their own side with no one properly taking charge of the situation.

Then again, there wasn’t much direction to take.

“I don’t—I don’t know what we can do,” Lily said.

“Not much.” James removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I wanted—I’d send her back to England, if I could. But we’ve no way of getting her back anytime soon. I doubt there’s a Floo connection or something in—where we’re going, and none of us learned how to make Portkeys that strong.”

“We’ll need to reorganize the shift schedule,” Remus said. “She can’t go on watch. That’s—that’s too much time alone.”

Sirius grimaced, but whether it was out of sympathy or annoyance, Lily couldn’t tell.

James put his glasses back on. “She’ll probably want time alone.”

“But not right now,” Lily said. The day of her parents’ death…. She’d have paid people not to be alone. Fortunately, it hadn’t come to that. Unfortunately, Petunia had never excelled at comforting people. “At least, I don’t think so, but I’m going to get Caradoc. Maybe he can get through to her.”

Remus and James both nodded: Remus as a cursory acknowledgment, James as though the idea hadn’t occurred to him.

Lily made her way down to the galley, noting Peter’s squat form in the crow’s nest, and knocked before entering.

“Come in,” Caradoc called.

“Hey.” Lily gave him a sad smile and stepped through the doorway. It smelled clean inside, and a stack of dishes sat on the counter next to the empty but still-wet sink.

He gestured for Lily to take a seat, but she shook her head.

“Er, bad news,” she said, one hand wringing the fingers of the other. “That is. Er. Marlene’s just lost her entire family to Death Eaters.”

“Oh. Oh, no.” His hands dropped to set down the serving dish he’d been holding, as though it suddenly weighed ten times more than it had a second ago.

“She’s locked herself in James’s cabin and won’t answer us, and I don’t—I thought you might try to see if you can get her to talk. James and the others are refusing to try, and I haven’t known her very long, and you’re—you, and I don’t really—” Lily crossed her arms. “I’m not sure what to do.”

“It’s not your responsibility to single-handedly help her.”

“I want to, though. Not single-handedly. Not that I’d know what to say.”

Caradoc nodded. “It’s hard to console someone after a loss like that.”

“But you’ll try?”

“I’ll try, but I’m not sure I’ll have better luck.” He flicked his wand to send the dish into a cupboard and followed Lily out of the galley. “I’m happy to see you’re free to move around again.”

“Yes, well, it turns out none of you are pirates and that I am, in fact, a Muggle-born thief.”

He offered a small smile. “I’m sorry I lied to you. Even if it was indirect.”

“Well, James made you, or so I’m told, and he’s the captain….”

It wasn’t nothing, that they’d lied to her. She’d never have tried to solve the map if James hadn’t lied about being pirates, and then he wouldn’t have caught her sneaking around, and then maybe he would have let her go in Oporto.

But there were other things to worry about at the moment than what might have been.

When they emerged from the gun deck, they found Dorcas near the library, forearms resting on the railing at the side of the ship. She turned to see it was Lily, and a faint grimace passed over her face.

“Go on in,” Lily told Caradoc.

He nodded, and Lily walked over to Dorcas, who kept looking out at the waves, eyes flicking about, mouth tenser than usual.

Although Lily tended to find herself around people more often than not, she didn’t mind being alone most of the time. But right now, being on a ship on the open sea, where her mother would have traded near anything to be…. Lily couldn’t go back into the library with James and his mates. Nor could she face the thought of sitting in the common room alone.

So Lily stood in silence with Dorcas, the ship smashing through the waves, the occasional spray of water misting up their way, for a good long while.

And, for the first time, Lily thought she might actually understand Dorcas.

\--

Lunch was a subdued affair. James took over in the crow’s nest, Caradoc had taken up vigil outside James’s cabin, and Dorcas refused to move from her position, leaving the other half of the crew with sandwiches in the common room.

Someone—probably Sirius—had tacked the wanted poster of Lily to the wall by the table. It hung askew, the edges frayed.

“I’m surprised the spell creating it has held up,” she told Remus, nodding toward the poster. It seemed a safer conversation topic than the other macabre thoughts that wouldn’t leave her alone.

“Oh, I’m confident James drew that,” he said. “He’s actually quite talented.”

The drawing of her was much prettier than her real face. The poster version had hair that fell in nicer waves than Lily’s, which was constantly a mess from the wind, and her mouth had a teasing tilt to it, amused and daring. Her mother’s mouth, or so she’d always been told.

Lily frowned. “But if he was following me around Oporto—he must’ve drawn that quickly.”

“He used to do flash portraits of people in Hogwarts,” Peter said, a little sadly. “Dead good ones, too.”

Sirius nodded. “Think I’ve still got one somewhere, that one of Dorcas.” He shot Remus a knowing look.

Remus ducked his head, the corners of his mouth twitching. “I’d forgotten about that.”

“Did he deliberately mess it up or something?” Lily asked.

“Nah,” Sirius said, leaning his chair back on two legs, gesturing lazily with his sandwich, “he drew her looking all cheerful, think he added a bow to her hair or something.”

Lily muffled a laugh with her hand. It seemed inappropriate to laugh, but it came out anyway, quiet but sharp.

“She jinxed him bald,” Peter said fondly. “They didn’t speak for two weeks.”

“Why did he draw her that way in the first place?” she asked.

Sirius shrugged. “Why did he put an eye patch on his cat?”

Lily conceded the point with a nod.

“I was looking forward to soup,” Peter lamented, setting down his half-eaten sandwich. “I haven’t eaten a sandwich since we left England, and I haven’t missed them.”

Remus fixed Peter with a scathing look, and Peter averted his eyes to his lap.

“I’m only saying,” Peter said. “I’m not—not blaming him.”

They lapsed into silence, none of them properly looking at each other.

“Did James tell you what happened to them?” Peter asked.

Sirius let his chair fall forward and hunched over his plate, his chin ducked. “He wouldn’t.”

“Oh. I suppose it was an attack, so it’s classified and all that….”

“No,” Sirius said roughly. “James just didn’t want to tell us.”

Remus studied his plate. “Eli deserved better. They all did.”

“Bloody good man, Eli,” Sirius said.

Remus nodded glumly. “He’ll be a challenge to replace.”

“Benjy can manage all right for a while,” Peter said. “And Marlene will be back soon enough.”

He didn’t look heartened by that, though, and neither did Sirius or Remus.

Lily didn’t know Eli, but she knew Marlene, who was probably curled up in a ball.

Or perhaps not. It had been so quiet on the other side of James’s door. Either Marlene had been eerily silent , or she’d cast a spell on the door and was actually in the process of systematically destroying James’s things. But Algernon was inside, and she wouldn’t put him at risk.

Maybe she only needed Algernon for company right now.

“We should have a funeral,” Peter said, eyes on his plate.

Remus tilted his head. “What do you mean?”

“I—I mean, not a funeral, because we don’t have bodies, but…I dunno.”

“Like a ceremony,” Lily agreed. “Something.”

She’d missed her parents’ funeral, hadn’t hung around long enough for it to happen. She’d never forgive herself for it, either.

Remus nodded. “Yes, some sort of send off…it might help. Good idea, Peter.”

Sirius looked skeptical, but said nothing, instead finishing off his sandwich. He pushed back in his chair. “Tonight, you think? The shifts are already wonky.”

“Might as well.” Remus dusted the crumbs off his hand and stood up. “I’ll talk to James.”

Everyone else seemed to be leaving, so Lily had to follow – she couldn’t be alone right then.

The map would be a good distraction, if it were available.

“Do you think the library’s going to be off-limits again?” Lily asked. “Even if Peter’s in there, I mean.”

“Yes,” Sirius said, right as Remus said, “I’m not sure.”

“James,” Lily concluded.

Remus nodded, and Sirius scoffed.

“Just tell her everything, then.” Sirius headed for the door. “She’s done nothing untrustworthy at all.”

Lily began stacking their plates. “Will you shut it if I give you your wand back?”

“No.”

“Right. No wand for you, then.”

“You don’t have it.”

She arched an eyebrow at him. “I’ll just toss it in the ocean if you don’t want it.”

“Points for your performance, but it’s no use taunting me. We went through your things.”

“Oh, of _course_ I can’t have your wand. Because I’m a Death Eater, according to you, and so therefore I must not be able to hide things from you. Or wait, isn’t that the attitude you’d take toward a Muggle-born? Do make up your mind, Sirius. Which am I?”

“Who says you can’t be both?”

“Logic,” Remus sighed.

“You Know Who could be holding her family hostage or something.”

“He’s right,” Peter said to Remus. But while Sirius walked out the door, Peter threw Lily a vaguely apologetic look.

Lily looked away. True as it was, Sirius probably wouldn’t believe her if she argued that there wasn’t anyone in her life to take hostage.

Remus held the door open for her and offered her a faint smile, and that did help, some.

They weren’t friends. Not when there were so many secrets between them. Not when they’d been willing to believe her a Death Eater not a day earlier.

But it was nice not feeling entirely alone.

\--

While Sirius and Remus climbed down to the gun deck, Lily followed Peter over to the shroud off the main mast.

“D’you think I’ll get to learn what you’re working on?” she asked.

“Er, I’m not sure.” Peter grabbed hold of the ropes. “It’s sort of…secret.”

“I did pick up on that.”

“So…ask James.”

“He doesn’t like telling me things.”

“He didn’t. But he told you we weren’t pirates, didn’t he?”

“I think he realized the ruse wouldn’t last forever.”

“Yeah, well, it was fun, a bit.”

Lily hummed noncommittally and watched Peter begin to climb up to the crow’s nest. He moved slowly, thinking through each move before he made it.

She leaned backwards against the rail and waited for James to come down. Unlike Peter, he scaled the ropes with ease, barely watching where he was going. He hopped down the last few lines of rope to stand next to Lily.

“Hullo,” he said.

“Hi. I think we need to talk, yet.”

“Yeah.” He ruffled up his already wind-strewn hair. “Probably. Navigation room should be clear.”

She trailed him up the stairs to the quartercastle deck, past the helm, and into the navigation room. Her fingers twitched when she noticed the outline of her bag in his pocket. If they’d been on the streets of Brest or Oporto, she’d have simply pulled it out of his pocket, but that seemed counterproductive at this stage.

He pulled out a chair for her, his hand gently guiding her by the small of her back as she stepped around him to sit down. His palm was warm through her shirt, and she missed it when it let go.

When she’d settled in, he took the seat next to hers.

“So,” he said.

“So.”

“What did you have in mind?”

“I thought—I thought you wanted Sirius’s wand back.”

“Oh. Yeah, ‘course. If you’ve got it, that is, although where you’re keeping it….”

“Well, I have it in a manner of speaking. It’s in my mokeskin bag, the one in your pocket.”

“S’pose I shouldn’t be too surprised.” He pulled her bag out and tossed it onto the table in front of her, the coins inside clinking. “I thought you might’ve Transfigured it, or Charmed the bag, but if you want to go ahead and reveal its secrets, I won’t object.”

“Would you give me a moment alone to do this?”

“No.” He caught the offended look that flashed across her face before she could suppress it. “Lily, I trust you now, all right? But you make it so difficult.”

“I’ve got personal belongings in here.”

“I’m not going to tell anyone else what you have in there. You know I won’t.”

And maybe she was foolish for trusting him, but he’d yet to harm her. He’d lied about being a pirate, but even that had apparently been for her own protection. Stupid, noble bastard.

Stupid, noble, handsome bastard with his tousled hair just so.

Her cheeks heated, and she wrenched her gaze from his hazel eyes to her bag.

“All right,” she muttered.

She dumped her coins and hairpins onto the table, inverted her bag, and pulled Sirius’s wand out.

“Maybe now he’ll leave me alone.” She set the wand on the table with more force than was strictly necessary.

“Probably not. Maybe more than he did.” He craned his neck to try to see into her bag. “But that’s an interesting bag you’ve got there. Can I see it?”

Lily hesitated, hand tightening around her bag, but then she gave it over. There wasn’t anything scandalous inside.

He held up the bag in front of his face and rotated it, examining the exterior. “I’ve seen ones that open outright into wizard space, but not this inverted version. Brilliant.” He rummaged around inside and pulled out her dagger, raising his eyebrows. “Unarmed, eh?”

“I didn’t use it, did I?”

“No,” he allowed, and placed it back in the bag. He took out the book, scanned the title, and slid it across the table to her. “Have at that,” he said absently, and picked up her necklace.

Lily nearly sat on her hands to keep from grabbing it away from him. No one had touched it but her since that man had stolen it.

James only glanced over it, though, and handed it back to her. “It’s beautiful.”

“My parents gave it to me.” She draped the chain around her neck and stretched her arms back to snap the clasp shut.

It was just a silly, teardrop shaped pendant. It wasn’t a royal jewel, or a family heirloom, or anything particularly special. But adjusting it around her neck still felt like putting on heavy armor.

“Sentimental value,” James said to himself. He cocked his head, looking at her pendant. “When did you lose them?”

“Two and a half years ago. A fire at the theater, of all things.”

He smiled humorlessly. “Ah, right. Our favorite era in history.”

His parents had to be dead, too, if he’d inherited the ship. And that was…he understood. Both Lily, and now Marlene.

“What about you?” Lily asked. “When did yours….”

“Oh, eight months ago, now.”

He spoke with an affected air of calmness—she was plenty familiar with it from her own experience—and he didn’t look at her, instead pretending to casually look out the window at the back of the ship.

Lily’s hands, which seemed to have developed a mind of their own, nearly reached out to clasp his.

She ducked her head. “Did What’s His Face….”

“Hm?” He looked back at her, then at his lap. “No. No, they didn’t—they were pretty old, and being on a ship—it was difficult.”

“That’s rather….only most owners don’t go on the ships themselves, I thought.”

“They hadn’t run the ships themselves for years, but then with You Know Who…. We were running refugees to France. Muggle-borns, half-bloods. Anyone You Know Who might’ve wanted.”

And that sealed it for Lily.

She’d been so quick to judge him for not fighting What’s His Face. She’d been fleetingly angry with him for lying about being a pirate, and inadvertently prolonging her stay on board.

But while Lily had been lifting trinkets off pirates, he’d been saving Muggle-borns. If she’d stayed in England, he might very well have saved her.

In that moment, she thought of nothing other than leaning over and pressing her lips against his.

Instead, she said, “Oh.”

“Yeah. It’s good work.”

“That’s brilliant that you’re helping them. Us, really.” She hadn’t felt this ineloquent in a very long time. “Is that why your parents got the ship?”

“No, they ran a wizarding shipping firm, so they—well, I have several ships. Business has been on the decline, though.”

“I can imagine.”

“But it was good to have the ships ready for this. You Know Who has locked down the Floo network, and international Portkeys are tricky at best, so…yeah. Ships. Harder to track. Hold a lot of people. Good for refugee shuttling.”

“That’s really—” There were many words she could have said, none of which seemed remotely adequate. Too many of them came too close to revealing too much. “I’m sorry I ever said anything about you running away.”

“Well, it’s not like I do much.”

“James, you’re saving lives.”

He shrugged. “Dumbledore would find another way, if I weren’t around.”

He wasn’t watching her again, so obviously uncomfortable bringing himself any semblance of praise on this issue, and her heart clenched.

“Is that what you lot normally do, then?” she said, more to distract herself from thoughts of ravishing him than anything else. “When you’re not pretending to be pirates, that is. You help refugees?”

“Nah,” he said, shoulders relaxing. “Only Dorcas and Caradoc were helping me before this trip. My other crew members didn’t fancy a longer trip – they’ve got families to protect, so I asked my friends. And, Merlin knows why, but they agreed to come.”

It was hard to tell if he was truly baffled, or simply feigning it. Lily was inclined to believe the former.

He’d laid out some of his secrets, now, but it wasn’t enough. He was so—he was so _James_. There were more secrets between them, though, and if she wanted—she needed to clear the air, yet.

Lily nodded. “They agreed, though, and now you’re going to the Azores to do something What’s His Face doesn’t want you to do.”

“Right,” he said. And then he frowned. “Wait. Lily.”

“I was bored, James,” she said dismissively. “And I thought you were pirates because _you told me you were pirates_.”

“Peter was locking that map up.”

“Didn’t we already establish you’ve got crap security?”

“Did you have another hairpin?”

It might have been monumentally stupid to point out his security flaw because she might need it again, but—

“Algernon,” she said.

“The _traitor_ ,” James breathed. “You _used_ him.”

“In his defense, I bribed him with bacon.”

“Oh, you _minx_.”

A shiver scurried up her spine. She leaned forward to try to hide it.

“So you got your hairpin and found the map.” He sighed. “Of course you did. You did the one thing that would make us _more_ suspicious of you.”

“I thought it was a bloody treasure map, and I wanted—I thought I could crack it, so I looked at it a few times. It’s still your fault for lying to me, you know. I thought I had something valuable on my hands.”

“Oh, it’s valuable, but not to Muggles.” He tapped his fingers on the table. “If we’re going to be…well, on the same page. I mean, we never figured out how you moved around on board. We looked for you in the library.”

If she told him, she wouldn’t be able to use her candle anymore. Not that she particularly wanted to—now that James knew she’d seen the map, she could save the rest of the candle for future adventures—but it was also her key to freedom if he turned on her again.

But she didn’t think he would.

“The candle,” she said, nodding toward the bag.

James pulled out her candle and inspected it. “What, like a Hand of Glory?”

“If a Hand of Glory makes you invisible, then yes.”

He tucked the candle back in the bag and dug around a bit more. “That’s everything you have?”

“Well, what did you expect to find, exactly?”

“I dunno. Lockpicks and jewels and artwork, maybe.”

“I’ve got my hairpin. I’ve got my candle and my bag. That’s enough for me to get by.”

“I thought you’d have more…valuables.”

“I sell whatever I take, either to travel or to eat. It’s not—I don’t do this out of greed.”

“Right,” he said absently. “Of course.”

“So that’s my secrets exposed.” Her hands no longer itched to have her bag back in her possession; he’d take care of it. “I think turnabout’s only fair play, though. So tell me, Captain Potter, what’s in the Azores?”

“Well, if you’ve looked at the map…. I’m not sure I should say. I haven’t asked—it’s only—I suppose you’re Muggle-born.”

He tapped his fingers on the table again, his eyes briefly entranced by his own hand.

“We’re looking for an island,” he finally said. “It’s in the Azores, we just don’t know where, exactly. You have to come at it at from exactly the right angle or you’ll never find it.”

“The starting point and direction.”

“Right. Someone embedded the island’s location on that map in code, and we’re trying to crack it. Well, mostly Peter is.”

“Not that he doesn’t seem decent enough as a person, but putting him in charge of the map might not have been the wisest move.”

“I trust Peter,” James said firmly. “He was always very good at puzzling together the ideas we came up with at Hogwarts.”

“I saw his work on the map. He might be good at putting other things together, but he’s not doing very well at this.”

“Well, he’s been trying. It’s not easy. We help when we can, but there’s so much work involved with maintaining the ship….”

She wasn’t obligated to tell him the next part, but if this would help them fight What’s His Face….

“There’s something in there,” Lily said. “That is, I noticed something that Peter hasn’t, and I’m not sure what it means, but….”

James leaned toward her, eyes locked on Lily, and he nodded for her to continue.

“There’s _something_ I recognize,” she said. “It’s like it’s right on the outside of my mind – I know it, but every time I try to look at it, it disappears.”

“I’m not your captain, I know,” he said. “You don’t owe me anything. But if you have any insight, or thoughts on the map that you think could help…well, I hope you’ll share them with us.”

“Of course I’ll tell you if I think of something. You said you were doing something What’s His Face doesn’t want done, which I assume is at the end of this map. But if you actually want me to solve it, it would probably help if you told me what, exactly, is on this island you’re looking for.”

James looked out the windows, his lips pressed together. The clouds were low and gloomy today, the ocean a dull gray.

After a long minute, he turned back to her. “We’re looking for the Island of Prophecies.”

“An island of prophecies.” She laughed a little, only because of the things she might’ve expected, prophecies were nowhere near the list. “Of course, how could I not have guessed?”

“I suppose you might not know much about prophecies—I dunno if Snape ever told you about them—”

She shook her head.

“Right. Well, there are Seers who make real prophecies that come true. Not many Seers, but some. The Ministry—the old Ministry—kept copies of Seer prophecies and stored them away on the island.”

“Why would the Ministry for Magic hide the prophecies on an island hundreds of miles away from England?”

“Security. They’re very…people get very strange about prophecies, about trying to hear them and change things. The Ministry got tired of people trying to break in, and they wanted to make getting to prophecies more difficult. Bode—the bloke who made the map—he was a friend of my parents, worked in the Department of Mysteries. The Ministry had a portal door to the island to let the right people get to it easily, but Bode destroyed it before he fled the Ministry during the takeover.”

“Awfully foresighted of him.”

“He worked with the prophecies for a living, and he knew which prophecies existed, and...well, he knew what You Know Who wanted.”

“Oh?”

James leaned forward. “There’s a prophecy about You Know Who. Not many know, but it’s about his downfall, and You Know Who will do near anything to get it.”

“But he’s been in power for years. Surely he’s found the island and heard it by now.”

“We’re pretty confident he hasn’t, and we couldn’t go after it until now because we only just stole the map from the Ministry. Bode had only ever told us that there _was_ a map, and we couldn’t ask him how to solve it because—because he killed himself when the Death Eaters came for him, rather than let You Know Who learn how to find the prophecy.”

Lily sat back and folded her arms. There weren’t many things she would kill herself over, if anything. Clearly whatever this prophecy was—whether or not it would come true, which she personally doubted—James’s crew and What’s His Face treated it like dogma. And people would do all sorts of mad things for dogma.

“You took the map,” Lily mused, “but What’s His Face could have made a copy. He could still be working on finding the island himself. Unless he knew that you had the key, and he was waiting for you to take the map so he could follow you.”

“Yes,” James said darkly.

“Oh. So you thought I was—I see.”

“Yeah.”

“So you’ve got a map to solve, no clues to go with it, and we could just be wandering around the Azores for weeks, in a space we know will probably also have Death Eaters roaming about.”

“Well…we have one clue, at least. But fat lot of good it’s done us so far.” He grimaced. “In the corner of the letter Bode sent us right before they found him, separate from everything else, he wrote ‘oi.’ We assume it’s a clue, anyway, and not some random thing he tacked on at the end for no reason.”

“Oi is a funny sort of clue.”

“I certainly thought so.”                                                       

Lily heard the door handle turn, and turned to find Sirius profiled against sunlight in the doorway.

“What’s this?” he said, frowning.

James drew Lily’s bag closed and slid it down the table to her. “Scheming.”

“Liar,” Sirius said, half a smirk on his face.

“You know me too well.”

“Oi, is that my wand?”

Lily picked it up and tossed it to him, and he smoothly grabbed it from the air, even managing to grasp it by the handle.

“Oh, I did miss you,” Sirius murmured to his wand. “Shame on you for taking it,” he told Lily.

“Shame on you for treating me like shit.”

“Shame on you for being a Death Eater.”

“Come off it, Sirius,” James sighed. “She didn’t have to give it back.”

Sirius looked mulish for a moment, and then feigned nonchalance. “Remus says you should convene the crew soon and let them know what’s what.”

“Of course. Have him round them up in a bit?”

“Aye aye,” Sirius said, and he ducked out the door.

“We should go, too,” James said. “Caradoc probably needs to get back to work, and if we don’t want to leave Marlene completely unattended….”

“Did you want to be alone?” Lily asked quietly. “When your parents….”

“When mine—no. Not at all.”

“I didn’t either. But I couldn’t stand to be around….”

“So you ran.”

She smiled grimly, and pushed back in her chair. “And here we are.”

“Sirius shared a bed with me for two weeks after.”

“It must have been a tight fit.”

“Well, it wasn’t here, and he’s—he fit in fine.”

Lily dropped her book into her pouch, and then tucked that into her trouser pocket, feeling like she’d got a missing limb back. She could use her dagger on attackers. She could finish her book. If she wanted to leave the crew behind in the Azores, she had gold to barter passage.

She was free again, or at least she could be, once they neared land.

“I wish we knew what Marlene wanted,” she said before they reached the door. “I hate….”

“Yeah. I know.”

She followed him back down to the library, where Caradoc sat hunched forward in a chair, his elbows on his knees.

He sat up straight and nodded at Lily and James. “No word yet.”

James compressed his lips and knocked on the door. “Marlene?”

Still she didn’t answer, and James turned back around, shoulders hanging.

“That’s all we can do.” Lily reached out to brush her hand along his arm, and he smiled sadly at her.

The door handle creaked behind him, and Marlene stepped around him into the library, her hair tied back in a frayed bun, her eyes red and puffy.

“Hi,” she said. “I think—I was going to sleep, but that’s your bed, James, and you can—you can have your room back now. It’s after lunch so I have to—I have to go sleep.”

Lily and Caradoc locked eyes, neither quite sure what to say or do.

After a beat, Lily said, “Sleep sounds wonderful, Marlene. Do you want me to walk you down?”

“Oh, no, you’re still injured. You shouldn’t be moving about too much. Healer’s orders.” She looked around, seeming a little confused, and then settled her gaze on the door to the main deck. “Right. Sleep.”

She passed by Lily as she crossed the room, and Lily almost reached out to grab her arm. There was nothing more to be said, though, and she watched Marlene walk out onto the deck with long, frantic steps.

Through the lace curtains Lily saw Dorcas finally turn away from the railing. Marlene took a step toward her, and Dorcas stood, arms hanging at her side, for a long moment. Then Dorcas crossed the space between them in two quick steps and wrapped her arms, stiff and vice-like, around Marlene’s shoulders.

For a hug of sympathy, it was beyond short. To an outsider it probably would have looked terribly awkward, a forced, feigned gesture.

But Lily knew better.

Dorcas’s arms wrenched themselves away from Marlene and she spun back to the rail. Marlene lingered for a moment, frozen in place. But after a moment she continued on her path across the deck and disappeared down the ladder.

“Caradoc,” James said, without looking away from the window, “cook with the door open, yeah?”

Caradoc sighed. “Aye aye, Captain.”

Sirius came in from the deck, followed by Dorcas and Peter.

“Remus is on watch,” Sirius said, “and I figured Marlene could find out later….”

“Yeah.” James drew his shoulders back and cleared his throat. “Right. I’ll try to keep it short, everyone. The Death Eater snuck on in Oporto and hid in the magazine while I was off chasing Lily. She knew we’d be landing there – someone told her, but she didn’t know how they knew. She was supposed to destroy our map, take care of as many of us as possible, and Portkey out.”

“Should she be here for this?” Sirius jerked his head toward Lily.

James ignored him. “She doesn’t know anything about what happened with Marlene’s family. She said—” He abruptly tilted his head down and to the side, then shook his head and looked up again. “She had no idea who Lily was, for the record—”

“Means nothing,” Sirius said under his breath.

“—but she did know some names Mad-Eye asked about, and was able to answer some of the things he wanted to know.”

“Good,” Dorcas said fervently.

“Yeah, well, I hope so, anyway. I need to think some more about what we’re—what we’re going to do with her, now.”

Lily waited for Dorcas to shout, _Kill her_ , but Dorcas remained silent, her arms folded tightly over her chest. Peter stood a safe distance from her, looking as though he might sick up.

“Caradoc,” James said, “bring her regular meals. She’s restrained, but use the normal precautions, all right?”

Caradoc nodded.

“Everyone else, steer well clear of the magazine. Sirius will set up some wards that should keep most of you away from there, and keep her in. This is for everyone’s protection. I haven’t spoken to Mad-Eye yet, but I’m confident he’ll back me on that. And, please, since we do have a captive Death Eater on board, keep his advice in mind, yeah?”

Sirius’s lips twitched.

“Right,” James said. “That’s it, then. Caradoc, please catch Marlene up on all this when she wakes up. And, you know….”

“Yes, James. Door open.”

\--

The rest of the crew did the only thing they could: try to return to life as normal. Sirius and James called out tacking spells, Peter worked in the library on the map, and Lily tried to finish her novel in the common room. Remus sat with her during his free shift, but Lily was fairly confident that between the two of them, they didn’t read more than ten pages. She kept absently looking out the window and wrenching her attention back to her book. She’d never read so intently before in her life, ensuring she picked up every word rather than let her mind wander.

Marlene didn’t appear again until the sun had vanished behind the horizon. She stood in the doorway to the common room, awash in candlelight, wearing a plastered-on smile.

“Hi,” she said, dropping down next to Lily on the sofa.

“Hello.” Lily set her book on the table and turned to Marlene. “I’m so sorry for your loss,” she said, although it felt strange in her mouth. Not because they were the wrong words—those were the things that you said—but because Marlene didn’t seem morose.

“Thanks. What did I miss out here?”

“Er, nothing.”

“Figures. Your attack is probably all the excitement we’ll have for a while.”

Lily repressed a frown. “I’m fine without more excitement if that’s what’s on offer.” She tried to come off as joking but she’d probably failed.

Or perhaps Marlene was too far gone to notice.

Marlene sighed. “Life on a ship is so dull.”

Lily stared at her.

A moment later the door opened behind them, and Remus—brilliant, interrupting Remus—stuck his head through. “Marlene, would you join us on the forecastle deck? You, too, Lily. The captain’s request.”

Marlene’s smile tightened further, but she crossed the room anyway, and Lily followed her.

It was normally James’s turn on watch that shift, but only Sirius was missing from the group gathered on the deck.

“Marlene,” James said, with more delicacy than Lily would have expected, “we thought we’d have…a send-off, of sorts. We thought we’d do a modification on the Welsh rites, without the fire, because I thought…we all wanted to say goodbye.”

“Oh.” Marlene blinked, her false smile dropping only for a moment. “All right.”

At James’s instruction, they formed a tight circle on the deck, with a brief gap between shoulders where Algernon sat next to James. Marlene stood between Caradoc and Dorcas, her shoulders tense.

One by one, the rest of the crew said a few words about the McKinnons, sharing stories and memories while the night wind whipped around them. A story about Marlene’s mum making James tea, another from Hogwarts about Eli giving Peter detention, and yet another about Eli’s fiancée, who put on one-woman shows for her friends when it suited her.

The McKinnons sounded like perfectly lovely people, but then again, most people did, once they were dead.

The others kept speaking, but Lily stopped listening after a while. A stone seemed to have formed in her throat early on in the ceremony, and the longing and desperation and frustration she could never seem to leave behind swarmed her.

If her parents hadn’t died, she wouldn’t have ended up on James’s ship, wouldn’t have been there to witness the McKinnons’ pseudo-funeral.

But maybe she would have landed there all the same, maybe she still would’ve given pirating a chance. Her mum had taught her all those things, and surely she hadn’t expected Lily to never want to try to use them….

Her mother might have been proud of her if she could see her now. Or perhaps not. Lily wasn’t a pirate, after all. She was just…in between.

Her father wouldn’t have approved of her life. He’d married a pirate, but Lily’s mum had stopped pirating to be with him, and how could her mother have made that choice? How could she have given up everything she’d worked for to just to sit around the estate all day?

Lily might not have been cut out to be a pirate, but the domestic life her mother and sister had chosen wasn’t for her, either.

She wanted to curl up under a blanket and never come out. Missing her parents never really went away. It just receded, the ocean retreating from a beach between waves.

But the waves, when they came, didn’t reach quite as high as they used to, and they didn’t knock Lily over anymore.

Lily glanced at Marlene, who’d been sent careening for the first time. She wished there were some way to spare Marlene all the subsequent waves, some way to keep her from finding herself in France a year later and suddenly crying while walking down the street.

But grief marched on at its own immutable pace, heartless to the whims of others.

There was a lull after Remus finished speaking—a charming but somber anecdote about Eli Healing him one night—during which everyone but Lily and Marlene pulled out their wand. James slowly raised his hand, until his wand pointed straight up to the stars, and the others followed suit.

Everyone else seemed to know what they were doing, but no one had thought to brief Lily on the procedure. Still, she could improvise, and she raised her fist in the air.

Marlene stood as still as a tree, not wearing her fake smile, but not looking solemn either, her features arranged in a rigid, neutral expression.

“The heavens themselves blaze forth the death of princes,” James called out.

There was a half moment’s pause, and then long streams of blinding white light burst out of their wands. Five jets of light arced high above the crew, past the sails, until they were streaks against a backdrop of twinkling stars. The lights curved sharply inward, colliding into a bright starburst that Lily watched through squinted eyes.

The intensity only lasted a second, though, as the lights began to dim—no, to fall apart. The beams had disintegrated into thousands of tiny, sparking balls of light, a cascade of them that drifted back down onto the crew.

Lily had never seen anything as perfectly, exquisitely beautiful as the field of stars floating around her. Their slow descent was somehow soothing, a moment of peace after a few frantic days. After a few restless years, truly.

The lights landed harmlessly on hair and shoulders and noses before vanishing altogether. One landed on the bridge of James’s glasses, sending him into a sneeze.

But while Lily’s heart finally felt something like calm, she forced herself to look toward Marlene.

Because none of this was for Lily. It was for the crew, who needed to say goodbye. And it was for Marlene, who needed to know she wasn’t the only one grieving. That they were there for her.

The rest of the crew, visible in the moonlight and the sparks still raining onto them, watched the path of the lights, looking somber and pained, but better, somehow. Lighter.

Marlene was looking up, just like the others, but her expression was still fixed and unflinching. And whatever moment of peace Lily had been having was twisted.

It had worked for some of them. It had worked for Lily.

It had not worked for Marlene.


	12. Democratic Rule

Lily’s side barely twinged at all in the morning, and she scaled the ladder to the main deck just in time to see Marlene scaling down the shroud, backlit by the sun.

Marlene dropped onto the deck in front of her. “Morning!”

“Morning,” Lily said, uncertain if she should act somber, or mirror Marlene and pretend nothing had happened. “Coming to breakfast?”

“Oh, pass, thanks. I’ve got a schedule to keep.”

“I thought mealtimes were part of the schedule.”

Marlene forced a smile that wrenched at Lily’s heart.

She stood on the balls of her feet, and seemed to vibrate with a strange energy, nearly bouncing in place, eager to move on and do—something. If it weren’t for that awful smile, Lily might’ve mistaken her eagerness for a renewed interest in sailing. If it weren’t for that smile, and the red streaking through the whites of her eyes, and the few locks of hair that had fallen out of her braid and hung askew.

“Right,” Lily finally said. “Well, I’m going to eat. And you should, too, at some point.”

“Yeah, right. Will do. But I’ve got to run right now.”

Marlene turned away from Lily without another word and took the stairs to the quarterdeck two at a time.

There was no chance Marlene wasn’t really in ruins, and there _had_ to be something Lily could do.

She just couldn’t think of what it was.

Lily trudged into the common room, where the smell of fresh bread greeted her. Caradoc turned from directing food through the air and smiled sadly.

“Run into Marlene?” he asked.

Lily nodded and sank down into a seat. “She’s so….”

“I know what you mean.” Caradoc brought his wand down to settle the platters onto the table, the dishes nudging each other out of the way to make everything fit. “I ran into Dorcas a few minutes ago. She said Marlene’s been this way all night.”

“Shit.”

“It could be worse, I suppose.”

“I just…I hate seeing her that way.”

“So do I.”

Lily didn’t blink when Dorcas joined her at the table, taking the seat furthest away, but then James entered and sat next to Dorcas.

“Not too cool for us common room diners anymore?” Lily said.

“Nah.” James twirled a fork in his hand. “Gets a bit lonely eating by yourself.”

“He thought it was pirate-like,” Dorcas said. “Idiot.”

“Oi, we convinced her, didn’t we?”

Lily caught Caradoc rolling his eyes, just barely, before he sat down next to her.

“Thoughts on what to do about Marlene?” Lily asked. “Or are you too busy giggling over your idiotic ruse?”

“Nothing to be done,” Dorcas said bitterly, helping herself to some bread.

Which was of course the truth, but Lily’s chest tightened at hearing someone else say it. Marlene was in pain, but Lily could do nothing.

“We’d all talk to her if she wanted,” James said, “but I tried, and she doesn’t—she won’t talk about it.”

Caradoc poured himself a cup of tea. “I tried earlier, too, but she said she had to go clean the deck.”

James’s mouth slid into a frown. “I thought she might like a shift or two off, but she insisted on sticking to the schedule. And she has been working, only it’s a bit…manic? The deck’s never been cleaner.”

Lily took the teapot from Caradoc. “At least it’s not something more harmful?”

“She’s not right,” Dorcas concluded.

“But we had the send-off.” James mussed up his hair with one hand. “And I thought—she always seemed better after the ones we had back in England.”

“Those weren’t for her family,” Caradoc said softly.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Who did you quote?” Lily asked. “The line about the heavens – I’ve heard that before.”

“Oh, I dunno. Sirius gave it to me, said he thought it seemed fitting. And it’s a sight easier than trying to say the usual Welsh phrase.”

“You didn’t even try?” Dorcas said. “Coward.”

“Welsh is _mad_ , all right? So I improvised. Anyway. If you think of something, Lily, let me know, but for now I don’t know that there’s much we _can_ do. At least, not for Marlene. You could do with some magic lessons.”

When confronted with a magical attack, Lily had been stupidly useless. Even if she’d had a wand, she wouldn’t have known what to do besides stab the woman in the eye.

But she didn’t have to stay that way, apparently.

“If you’re offering,” she said, “that’d be brilliant.”

“Remus would probably be best,” James said. “Oh, and Dorcas.”

Lily’s eyes flicked to Dorcas, but rather than looking disgusted, Dorcas was watching her intently.

“How much do you already know?” Dorcas asked.

“Er, that I remember? Maybe five spells. It’s been years since I’ve actually cast anything.”

Dorcas and James shared a look that Lily didn’t care for, and he glanced back in time to catch Lily’s scowl.

“It’s just—that’s so strange,” he said. “Nothing on you. But if you haven’t had a wand—it makes sense. You can have the Death Eater’s, you know. She’s not going to need it.”

“Oh,” Lily said. Any wand was better than no wand, but a wand that belonged to someone like that…. “Right. Is she still—she’s still down in the magazine, isn’t she?”

“Warded safe and sound.”

“What did Moody tell us to do?” Caradoc asked.

“He had some recommendations,” James said, “but it’s up to us, really. He can’t stop us if we—if we make a group decision.”

Dorcas nodded. “Good.”

“I think we’ll have a vote. I’m not promising I’ll listen to the outcome, but I want to know what everyone thinks. Let the others know they need to consider their options, will you?”

“Aye aye, Captain.”

“You know, I never got why anyone would add the second aye. One aye is fine for conveying the message.”

“No.” Dorcas slid back in her seat. “It isn’t.”

James sighed while Dorcas marched out of the common room. Lily caught a faint smile on Caradoc’s face before he sipped his tea, and she grinned at him.

“By the way,” James said to Lily. “I’m reassigning Sirius to help Peter with map duties. Cracking it is top priority.”

“Is that supposed to be a subtle hint?”

“Few people have ever accused me of subtlety,” James conceded. “Trickery, yeah. Cockiness. Charm. But never subtlety.”

She smiled. “I’m not promising anything, but I’ll try.”

“That’s all we ask. Should be something to keep you busy, if nothing else. Plus, you’ll be helping keep You Know Who from getting what he wants, so that’s got to count for something, right?”

“I certainly can’t argue with your agenda.”

“As far as agendas go,” James agreed, “it’s admittedly pretty damned stellar.”

\--

Lily followed James out of the common room, but hung back as he approached Marlene where she sat on the deck, repairing some ropes with her wand. He held a plate full of food in front of her face, nearly catching her nose on an egg.

It was better that James did it. He was her captain, after all, and she appeared to be listening to him.

But then Marlene leaned back and shook her head, and Lily turned away from them, arms folded. She needed somewhere to go, someone to visit, but the only other people available for company were Caradoc and Peter, and Caradoc was likely feeding the Death Eater. Just as well, really. She had duties, too, now.

This time, the library door opened for her.

Peter looked up from the map and offered a meek smile. “You’re here for the map?”

She took the seat next to him. “Apparently.”

“Good. I can definitely use the help.”

“I’m sure you’re doing fine.”

“It feels hopeless.” Peter slid the map to sit between them. “But James said you noticed something we didn’t.”

It didn’t take long to explain her theory about the dots. He agreed that they looked intentional, and they began compiling a final list of anagrams from the dotted letters. Even when she had the full list in front of her, though, none of the anagrams stuck out as an obvious clue.

They’d just begun discussing how else the letters could be coded—the letters could be shifted, the words might need to be translated first, or any other number of options—when James walked in from the main deck.

“How’s it coming?” he asked, resting his hands on the back of an empty chair. “She’s not showing you up, is she, Wormtail?”

Peter smiled. “She’s got some good ideas, actually. There are definitely dots there, but we’ve no idea what to do with them.”

“Bode was too clever by half.” James sighed. “I think working in the Department of Mysteries rotted his brain.”

“Maybe he got too close to the prophecies.”

James laughed and ruffled Peter’s hair. “I’ve got full confidence in you, but it can’t help to have a pair of fresh eyes.”

“It can’t hurt, anyway. I’ve been driving myself mad over this.”

“Still not as mad as Bode, though,” James said.

Lily cocked her head. “D’you have Bode’s message somewhere?”

“Er, yeah, sure,” James said. “Why, d’you think it’ll be useful?”

“There might be other clues or—I don’t know. I’m just curious, really.”

James disappeared into his cabin and returned with a thinly rolled piece of parchment in hand. He placed it on the table in front of Lily and sat down across from Peter.

Lily untied the piece of twine and unrolled the note to find elegant writing.

_The portal is gone. I’ll bring you the key to the map. Don’t let him get it._

_BB_

And there, in the top right corner, Bode had written in capital letters _OI._

Lily frowned. “Why did he write it up there?”

“We think he wrote it in a hurry when he realized he wasn’t—” James rubbed the back of his neck. “Er, his owl showed up missing a leg.”

“Oh,” Lily said, feeling a bit hollow.

She looked back down at the note.

These were Bode’s last written words. He’d killed himself just to keep this prophecy from What’s His Face. Someone clever enough to make this map—or mad enough, perhaps—had made the calculation that the world would be better off, and safer, without himself in it.

“Yeah,” James said. “So we think he was going to bring us the key but then he couldn’t, and maybe this is the key, or it’s not, or it’s part of a word…. We really don’t know.”

A few words started with oi: oil, ointment, oink. None of them seemed immediately helpful, though.

“What was Bode like?” Lily asked. “I mean, was he the sort of bloke who’d _say_ oi?”

“Not really an oi man, no,” James said thoughtfully. “He was a stodgy bloke. Bit of a pretentious git, actually—self-important, thought he was dead clever—but from what I know damn good at his job. Muggle-born.”

Muggle-born.

It didn’t matter, really, that he was. Had been, rather. Despite his blood status and whatever prejudices came along with it, clearly Bode had been talented and hard-working enough to land a nice job at the Ministry protecting exceptionally valuable objects.

If Lily’s parents had let her go to Hogwarts—if Before hadn’t become After—Lily could have done the same.

“Does the message help at all?” Peter asked.

“Hm? Maybe.” Lily glanced down at the note again. “Not yet. But it might.”

\--

James didn’t join them for lunch, but Marlene did. Although she still forced herself cheerful, she barely touched her food or spoke.

“Can’t believe he’s letting you look at the map,” Sirius muttered. “He barely let us look at it until we were on the ship.”

“And I _am_ on the ship,” Lily said. “Honestly, who am I going to tell?”

“How should I know? You kept my wand somewhere. Who knows what else you have?”

“James does, actually.” Her hands clenched around her utensils. “He’s seen everything I own, and he left me with everything—which isn’t much, not that it’s any of your business—except my cutlass.”

“Of course he didn’t leave you with that. He’s not a complete idiot. Most of the time.”

Remus looked like he was going to say something, but he didn’t, instead picking at his food.

“Have you talked to the Death Eater at all?” Peter asked Caradoc.

“She hasn’t said anything to me, and I haven’t asked.”

Peter bit his lip. “Right.”

“Not like she knows anything useful, best we could tell,” Sirius said. “Only about the work she’s done or heard of. And she’s done some pretty awful things, by the sound of it. She confessed to killing more than a few Muggles.”

“I still wish I could’ve helped with the interrogation,” Peter said.

Lily’s fork clattered against her plate as she abruptly set it down, her appetite lost. No one else seemed to be bothered by the news that the Death Eater had murdered Muggles.

Then again, they’d probably heard worse.

Sirius gave a half shrug. “Didn’t miss much, really, and we needed you on watch. You can probably have a look at James’s notes if you like.”

Peter nodded and went back to his food.

Marlene stopped eating halfway through the meal. Caradoc gently nudged her with his elbow, and she managed to clean a bit more off her plate by the time everyone else pushed back from the table.

Lily made to stand up, too, but Remus caught her eye and inclined his head. She nodded back, although she wasn’t entirely sure what she was agreeing to. Peter and Sirius wandered off to the library together, and Caradoc started clearing dishes, but Remus stayed seated, and so did Lily.

When they were alone, Remus reached into his pocket.

“Catch.” He tossed an item the size of a large walnut at Lily.

She swiped a hand out to catch it but missed, and it fell to the ground, spinning madly of its own volition. “Sorry.”

“My fault, really. I’m used to being around James and Sirius, who used to practice catching their wands for hours on end.”

“They didn’t really, did they?”

Remus gave her a sly smile. “They claimed it was a good dueling skill, and I suppose that’s true in a way, but mostly they probably thought it made them look cool.”

Lily laughed and picked up the item he’d thrown. It was a small glass top of sorts, only unlike the child’s toy, it kept flashing a bright light in her palm.

“What’s this, then?” she asked.

“It detects untrustworthy people. After a fair amount of effort I made it stop whistling, but even my strongest charms can’t keep it still.”

She held it up in front of her face, the top pinched between her fingers. “Interesting.”

“It’s been going off for months, actually. I’m of the opinion that it needs to be recalibrated, but I haven’t had time to take it in yet.”

She lowered the top and looked at Remus. “Are you giving me a broken toy?”

“No,” he said, on the verge of smiling. “I’m telling you that I trust you.”

“Because you have a broken top. Of course.”

“It’s been going off at a low level for a long time, since before we left England. It only started this madness when the Death Eater came on board.”

Lily let the device fall onto the tabletop, where it whirled about at random. “Oh.”

“Precisely.” He picked the top off the table and clutched it tight in his palm.

“So you’ve known all along that I wasn’t some Death Eater.”

“No, I thought it was broken. But clearly it works to some extent. When faced with a real threat, it performed.”

“Won’t be enough to convince Sirius, though, will it?”

“No,” Remus sighed. “But I wouldn’t worry about him. Even Dorcas might be coming around to you.”

“If by coming around you mean coming at me with a knife.”

“I was under the impression she hadn’t threatened you in days.”

“And what does it say about the circumstances that we’re measuring that in days?”

“Admittedly it’s less than ideal. But in any case, she’s not the only willing and able instructor on board. I’d be more than happy to teach you a spell or two in my spare time.”

“Yes,” Lily said immediately. “Please, I mean. If you’ve got time.”

“I always make time for an eager pupil. We could begin now, if you like.” He drew a wand out of his pocket.

No, two wands.

He held one out handle-first toward her, and yes, it was someone else’s wand, a murderer’s wand to boot, but it was a _wand_. Lily managed to take it with some modicum of restraint, and not snatch it out of his hands like a greedy child.

She liked the way it felt in her hand, cool and smooth and powerful.

“Can I hold onto it between lessons?” Her eyes traced the grain of the dark wood. It was longer than Sev’s wand, and it did feel less at home in her hand, but it was a _wand_.

“James said it’s yours for as long as you like.”

Lily had long been regretting her decision to steal from James, as unavoidable as her situation seemed in retrospect. Being confined, even on a nice ship with good food and some pleasant company, was tiring and frustrating.

But it might all be worth it, she thought, wand firmly clenched in her hand, if she got to learn more magic along the way.

\--

It had been years since she’d last cast a spell, and apparently some of her pronunciation had slipped in the interim, but the thrill in twitching her hand and uttering ancient languages and feeling the heady rush of magic course through her body—well, some things were unforgettable.

Some things were incredible.

She got in several attempts at the Shield Charm before she forced herself to go back to work on the map. Not that they got much done in the library when she arrived – Sirius was too annoyed that she was there to actually help them move past anagrams.

By the time dinner rolled around, they’d managed to bicker plenty without actually accomplishing anything.

It had served, however, to make Lily forget what James had scheduled for the crew that evening.

He joined them in the common room after dinner, gesturing for Caradoc to stay seated and leave the dishes alone for the moment.

“We’ll do this quickly so Remus can get back up on watch,” James said, standing at the head of the table. “Wait, where’s—”

Marlene ducked through the door and slipped into a seat.

“Right.” James offered her a tight smile. “We’re voting on what to do with the prisoner. I’m not promising I’ll follow the vote either way, but I’d like to hear your thoughts.”

Peter worried his lip. “Are we writing down our votes?”

“No. I want this all to be public, or at least public on the ship. But whatever gets said here, whatever happens, you’re not to tell anyone else, ever, what passes in this room tonight. We’ll never speak of it again either way. Understood?” He received a few nods and hums in response. “Right, then. Caradoc, we’ll start with you. You’ve got to feed her, after all.”

Caradoc’s eyes widened a bit. “Oh. All right.” He ducked his chin. “I think we should just keep her prisoner, and let Dumbledore decide once we get back.”

“Right. One for letting her live.” James nodded. “Moony?”

Lily blinked. She hadn’t realized—but of course those were the options. They hadn’t said it explicitly earlier, but what else could they have meant?

They’d given this a day’s thought and they—they were ready to _kill_ her. The woman had come to kill them if she could, but she was a person—an admitted murderer, but a person—and they were ready to commit the same crime they’d condemned her for.

Remus glanced at Marlene before looking up to James. “I second Caradoc’s vote. We can interrogate her more in England, and if nothing else, she could be a bargaining chip.”

Lily tried not to stare. Even Remus had gone harshly practical when it came to this woman’s life.

James’s eyes flicked to Sirius. “Padfoot?”

Sirius leaned back, hanging one arm off the back of his chair. “Off her, I say. My wards will hold, but we’ve already got everything we’re going to get from her. And you heard it from her own mouth – she was going to kill us given the chance. You can’t honestly want to keep that threat alive.”

“Two to one. Wormtail?”

Surely they wouldn’t actually kill her. James wouldn’t allow it. Who would do it, anyway? It would be James, probably, or maybe Remus as the first mate. Or maybe they’d let Sirius do it, given his eagerness.

But no, James would insist on doing it himself.

They weren’t voting for her life. They were voting on whether to make James kill someone, and Lily was useless to stop it. Her mouth had clammed up, and even if she had been able to wrench it open, she had no words ready, no clue how to object to the proceedings.

Maybe it wouldn’t matter. The vote was horrendous, but it wasn’t over yet.

Peter swallowed and looked down at his lap. “I vote…I vote not letting her live.”

“Two each. Marlene?”

“Kill her,” she said, without a hint of hesitation. Her false smile had vanished.

Marlene, who’d befriended Lily even when Lily had lied to her. They shouldn’t have let her vote, not in her current state. But without her, there would have been an even number of votes. Not to mention it was impossible to read how Marlene would have reacted to being excluded.

“Three to two,” James said, his face unnaturally void of expression. “Dorcas?”

But there was no question of which way Dorcas would vote.

Dread crept over Lily in cool, dark tendrils. Dorcas and James were the only votes left now, which meant—

It wouldn’t matter what James voted.

He’d have to kill someone. Possibly even before the night was through.

Lily’s mouth finally opened, ready to protest, when Dorcas folded her arms over her chest and scowled.

“Let her rot,” Dorcas said.

“Sorry,” James said, “is that—”

“In a cell. Alive and miserable. We’ll question her more back home.”

“Right. That leaves us with a tie, then.”

“What about Lily?” Marlene asked. “She’s the one the Death Eater hurt.”

“Oh, no,” Lily said hurriedly, “I’m not a part of the crew.”

Even if she’d felt entitled to a vote, she couldn’t have participated in this atrocity.

“But she’s got responsibilities now,” Peter pointed out.

“No,” James said. “I’ll break the tie. We’re letting her live.”

Marlene was suddenly standing up. She glanced down in confusion, as though she wasn’t entirely sure how that had happened. Then she looked around the table, that bloody fake smile plastered back on, and strode out of the room without another word.

One of James’s hands threaded through his hair. “Right. Thanks for your input.”

That was it, then. Two minutes of discussion and the Death Eater could have been dead.

She wasn’t, though. At least, not at the wands of James’s crew.

Lily glanced around the table. For all his bluster, Sirius only looked mildly disappointed, and Peter actually seemed relieved.

Caradoc began clearing dishes. Peter moved to the sofa to take out a deck of cards. Dorcas pulled out a knife next to him and began sharpening it. Remus and Sirius, heads leaning in and speaking quietly but fervently, wandered out onto the main deck.

Which left Lily and James at the table.

And she might not have been able to say anything during the vote, but her mouth was working fine now.

“We need to talk.”

\--

Lily led them upstairs, where James leaned back against the front rail of the ship, ducking his head.

“I can’t believe you just voted on that,” she said.

He looked up. “Sorry?”

“You _voted_ on whether to _kill_ someone.”

James squeezed his eyes shut. “Nothing on your intelligence, but I don’t think you have enough context to understand our situation—”

“It’s someone’s life you were just voting on, regardless of the context—”

“Lily, please remember that I do respect your opinion,” he said in a strained voice, his hands gripping the railing behind him, “but you don’t—the Death Eaters, they’re not like normal armies.” He caught her eye roll. “They’re ruthless.”

“I’m familiar with the novel concept of history, thanks. Ruthless armies are nothing new.”

“But you don’t know magical history, and you don’t understand—”

“What’s there to understand?”

James didn’t answer right away, and he swallowed hard before speaking. “We’ve got some of our people back from them, you know. After the Death Eaters finished with them. Meant as taunts, really. They’re not—” He closed his eyes. “Mad-Eye told me what they did to the McKinnons. How they found them—what was left of them—” He broke off and looked away. “I might’ve killed our prisoner, and she wouldn’t be the first person I’ve killed, Lily, but I’d never—I would’ve killed her quickly—”

“James—”

“And kept her for proper burial, with proper rites, and—”

“I know you would have,” Lily said. Her outrage had drained away, and her hand shot out to entwine itself with his.

He looked back to her, eyes searching hers, begging for forgiveness for a crime he hadn’t committed.

“James, it’s all right,” she said. “Really.”

He stood still, staring at their hands – he was holding back tightly, almost uncomfortably so, as though he needed to feel someone else’s pulse, alive and beating.

“I suppose it doesn’t matter,” he finally said. “She’s going to live.”

“For now.”

“For now,” he agreed. “And I know—I know it’s hard for you to understand what we’ve seen. What they’re like. But I didn’t initiate that vote lightly.”

She might not have understood the context, but she did understand him.

“No,” she said, “I—I know you didn’t.”

When she’d been a part of a pirate crew, they’d never killed unless it was necessary. Or so they’d claimed. Lily had only been able to stomach one raid with casualties before metaphorically jumping ship.

Her mother had never said whether she’d killed anyone. Lily had never asked—never thought to ask—but sometimes she wondered, now.

Of the murders she’d witnessed, the one James’s crew had just avoided would have been the most justified. Or at least as justified as killing could be.

“You’re actually lucky, I think.” James pulled his hand loose. “That you didn’t go to Hogwarts, and that you left England when you did. You missed all of this.”

“I don’t feel very lucky.”

“You must be at least a little lucky – you found us instead of Death Eaters.”

Her mouth curved into a small, humorless smile. “And then you held me captive. But in your defense, you haven’t killed me, so thanks?”

“I’ll take any points, even if they’re for basic human decency.”

“You’re more than decent, James.”

“Nah.” He pushed off the railing and turned around to rest his forearms against it. “I do all right, but I’m not running around England spying on Death Eaters or anything.”

“But you’re doing something else worthwhile. I mean, how many refugees do you think you’ve taken to France?”

“Er, I dunno. Since my parents started…maybe a couple hundred? Or more? Not something I try to keep track of.”

“That’s…. That’s amazing.”

He shrugged. “Most of the time I was just helping my parents.”

“I’m sorry I ever implied…you didn’t run away from England.”

“No,” he said, voice low. “I couldn’t.”

Her heart fluttered, a poplar leaf trembling in the wind.

“So who’s Mad-Eye, then?” she said briskly. “You mentioned him, and some other bloke – they’re in charge of you?”

“Us and, well.”

“Other people,” Lily supplied, leaning onto the railing next to him.

“I’m not really supposed to talk about it.”

“Your secret anti What’s His Face club?”

“Oh, believe me, we’ve got a much cooler name than that.”

“You must have. I mean, Mad-Eye – now _there’s_ a name.”

“It has the added benefit of being accurate – he’s actually got a fake eye. I mean, you’d know him on sight, just from knowing his name. Kind of brilliant, actually. My nickname doesn’t have that sort of dashing edge to it.”

“Prongs, right?”

He smiled. “Yeah.”

“I assume there’s a story behind it.”

“Of course there is. Who do you take us for?”

“Pirates.”

“Well, yeah. That. Prongs’d be a terrible pirate name. I’d want something cooler if I really were a pirate captain.”

“Captain Potter isn’t so terrible.”

“Sadly I’ll have Prongs for the rest of my life. It could be worse, I suppose, but it’s no Mad-Eye Moody.”

“Would you.…” Lily broke off. “Would you tell me about your top secret club? Please.”

He looked out at the last rays of sun melting into darkness in the distance. “Will it help you sleep?”

“Oh, tremendously.”

“All right,” he said, nearly smiling. “Let me tell you a bedtime story about a man called Dumbledore….”

\--

After James left to go on watch, Lily stayed on the deck for a while longer, watching the stars emerge around her. She pulled out the wand she’d got from Remus. Her wand, now.

“ _Lumos_ ,” she said quietly, and a faint light began glowing on the tip of her wand.

That had been the first spell Severus had taught her. They’d practiced with sticks until he turned eleven, pointing and shouting at each other in mock duels in the woods on the edge of the Evans estate.

Magic had seemed so exciting, then, all blooming flowers and levitating the kitchen biscuit tin into her hands. At the time, going to Hogwarts had seemed like even more of an adventure than becoming a pirate.

Her mother would sometimes show her things, or tell her stories, that Lily was absolutely forbidden to tell her father. “Pirates only,” her mother would say knowingly.

And Severus would teach her incantations that neither of them fully understood. He hadn’t asked it of Lily, but she’d kept those hidden, too.

She’d been keeping so many secrets, and now she had one more to hide, should she ever meet more witches and wizards.

Algernon appeared at the top of the stairs and trotted over to Lily. She sat down on the deck and spread her legs in a vee, one hand still holding the lit wand. Algernon half leapt onto her, his paws resting on her chest, his yellow eyes watching Lily’s face intently.

“Hullo,” she said softly. “Did you not realize I was a witch?”

Algernon, of course, said nothing.

Lily stroked her hand over his ears, down his neck and back. “I can do magic. Only I forget, sometimes. I suppose except for James’s eye patch you don’t have to pretend to be much of anything.”

When she’d finished her long stroke, he pulled his paws back and sat down in front of her, still watching.

Lily gestured with her wand. “I could kill someone with this.”

Algernon did not seem afraid, though.

James had barely been spared having to kill someone. He probably would have used his wand, and not a dagger or sword or whatever other nonmagical weapons were on board. Those methods likely hadn’t even occurred to him.

Severus hadn’t taught her the incantations for the Unforgiveables, but he’d told Lily about them in hushed tones, even though they’d been alone in the woods at the time.

It had sounded so inconceivable. A word or two, a flash of light, and someone could be dead. “But you have to mean it,” Sev had said.

Lily had never wanted to kill anyone. The pirates in her crew had expected it of her, though. Miguel had argued with her over it, in fact, hadn’t been able to understand her reluctance. He’d been raised on the streets, while Lily had jumped from a life of luxury to one riddled with violence.

Maybe it was easier to do it with magic. There had to be thousands of ways to kill someone without using the Unforgiveable. In theory it certainly sounded much less gruesome than slashing someone’s throat.

James had killed someone before. Probably a Death Eater. Probably in self-defense. Maybe even accidentally. But had he used an Unforgiveable? He seemed more likely to use one of the other endless methods.

Lily scratched Algernon under his chin, and he purred.

“James wouldn’t kill someone unless she had to,” she told him. “We both know that. I don’t know that anyone on this crew would. Even Dorcas didn’t do it, when she could’ve.”

At least, the crew Lily had met when she’d come on board wouldn’t have done it. Now, with Marlene….

Her voice had been so cold, her determination clear.

Lily pet Algernon one last time on the head. “Nice chatting, Algernon, but I’ve got something I need to look into.”

\--

She eventually found Marlene in the navigation room, re-stacking maps in the cabinet by candlelight.

“I thought you weren’t on duty this shift,” Lily said, hovering in the doorway with her arms folded.

“Nothing better to do,” Marlene said.

There were several questions Lily wanted to ask her—are you really upset James isn’t going to kill someone, would you have voted this way if your parents were still alive, how are you coping—but given Marlene’s attitude, they seemed pointless.

She couldn’t even fully blame Marlene for acting the way she was. Lily had been a mess herself at that stage, but she’d had the luxury of running away, hadn’t had people who cared pestering her with questions.

Not that she would have traded to be in Marlene’s situation.

But looking back, there was one thing that probably would’ve helped, if she hadn’t cut herself off from it.

“You know if you ever want to—to talk,” Lily said. “I know we haven’t known each other very long, but I think that helps, sometimes. Someone who doesn’t know everything and everyone involved. So if you want someone to just listen, or whatever else you need, I’m here.”

Marlene paused in her sorting, hand still on the shelf, and tilted her head. After a moment, she turned back to face Lily.

“You know what would be more fun than stacking maps?” she said, mouth curved into another terribly false smile. “Learning how to use a sword.”

“Sorry?”

“You bought that cutlass, yeah? Teach me how to use it.”

“I’m—I’m not exactly an expert.”

Marlene kept looking at her, and she was showing interest in something, and there wasn’t an obvious justification for Lily to say no. Maybe it would burn off some of Marlene’s frenetic energy. Maybe it would give her something to think about other than the obvious.

“Er, I suppose I could do that,” Lily said slowly.

It couldn’t be nearly as terrible an idea as Lily was imagining. James could lock up the cutlass when they weren’t using it.

“But James is in the crow’s nest,” Lily said, “and I don’t know where he put my cutlass.”

“That’s easy enough to fix. I’ll go on watch while he gets it.”

There was no excuse, then.

Ten minutes later, Lily stood with Marlene on the main deck, her cutlass in hand and a promise to James to return it when they’d finished. There were more ropes and other trippable objects around than she cared for, but it had the most open space.

“Right.” Lily held up her sheathed sword. “This is your standard cutlass and scabbard. Cutlasses are nice short sabres, good for close combat.”

Marlene nodded, eyes following the blade.

“You’ve got the hilt here”—Lily gripped her cutlass and unsheathed it, moonlight glinting off the steel—“and the blade.” She held out the sword toward Marlene without handing it over. “It’s dull back here by the hilt—for parrying—and up front it’s sharper, for attacking.”

Marlene leaned forward and inspected the blade. “Can I hold it?”

Lily held out the hilt with two fingers. Marlene gripped it—poorly, Lily noted—and stepped back to swish it through the air.

Lily reached out a hand to adjust her grip. “No, don’t wrap your hand around the hilt so tightly. Looser, more open. More in your fingers, less in your palm.”

Marlene adjusted her grip to something that wasn’t quite accurate, but close enough for a first lesson.

“If you hold it too tightly,” Lily said, “your arm will go wherever the blade goes. So if someone attacks and you parry, you’ll lose your arm movement. You need to hold on less tightly, give yourself more freedom and power.”

“Oh,” Marlene said, swishing the blade again, “it feels plenty powerful to me.”

Her faux cheer seemed a bit more real, then. Less empty.

But perhaps, Lily thought, watching Marlene slice through the air, that wasn’t an improvement at all.


	13. Watch Out for Sharks

Not that Lily had anything compare it to, but after the Death Eater’s attack, the crew seemed to move back into its normal schedule with astonishing speed. Sometimes they spoke about the prisoner—always as “the Death Eater”—but apart from that, there might have been no threat on board at all. No one else woke suddenly in the night, their sheets damp and cold with sweat, or if they did, they hid it well. Sometimes Lily traced a hand along her scar, if only to remind herself that she had to be careful, even if everyone else thought her attacker was locked up.

Then again, apparently everyone else had been through worse.

Remus caught her touching her side one time after lunch, and showed Lily a thick, ragged scar that trailed down most of his leg.

“Nasty hex,” he said. “I couldn’t walk for a week while it healed.”

“Missed out on chasing down this bloke we knew from Hogwarts, too,” Sirius lamented.

And now that Lily knew about their real destination, the stories started cropping up. Recountings of reconnaissance missions into the Ministry, tailing Death Eaters, getting ambushed. They’d all faced dire circumstances in their own ways, many of them more than once, but they all spoke of it so lightly.

“So I’m bleeding out into the street,” Sirius said over lunch one day, “and Mad-Eye is shouting in my ear to _get up off your bleeding arse_ , and I start laughing because my arse _is_ bleeding—”

Peter nodded eagerly. “I was trying to Heal Remus. And then Sirius is shouting at me to get over there—”

“And I’m half-dead at this point,” Remus said, “and he _leaves_ me—”

“For a minute!”

“You _left_ him?” Lily said.

“I had to be in two places at once. What was I supposed to do?”

“Half _dead_ ,” Remus reminded him.

And amid the stories and the dreams and the map, the days started slipping into each other. Some days Remus kept Lily in the common room after lunch for a magic lesson, or for chess. Marlene requested a sword lesson every night, their practices lasting from when Marlene woke up until Lily’s instructions got lost in her yawning.

Marlene picked up stances quick enough—“One foot straight forward, the other sideways and a little back. Yes, like that. Distribute your weight almost evenly, just a little forward”—and drilled for long hours, shuffling back and forth across the deck, with a fervency Lily had never developed for the sword.

Mostly, though, Lily spent her days in the library with Peter and Sirius.

“Oi,” Lily muttered one night before dinner. She stretched her arms up over her head, her back cracking loudly. The late evening sun streamed through the lace curtains to cast intricate shadows over Bode’s note. She’d set two paperweights on the ends of it to keep it lying flat. “Why oi?” She hunched over the note gain. “What was he trying to get us to notice?”

Peter sighed. “Well, it’s either oi, or ee-o. Not much of an anagram.”

“Or Io,” Lily corrected. “Although why he’d write about Io….”

She looked at the note from Bode once more, and then rummaged around in Peter’s pile of parchments, shoving aside a few sheets to pull out his list of potential anagrams for the dotted letters.

“Io?” Peter asked.

“Don’t mind him,” Sirius said to Lily. “He always fell asleep during Astronomy. Io’s a moon of Jupiter, Wormtail.”

“Named after a mythological figure,” Lily said absently. “The Greek woman who shagged Zeus and got turned into a cow.”

“Because talking about Jupiter’s lovers makes loads more sense than oi.”

“No,” Lily said, eyes skimming over the list of potential anagrams, “but there’s something…something related here. I just can’t remember….”

“Something related to Io. Really.”

A triumphant smile stretched across Lily’s face. “Yes.” She shoved the parchment toward Sirius. “ _Oceans_ doesn’t use all the dotted letters, but _Oceanus_ does.”

Peter frowned, and Sirius’s eyebrows drew together.

“Another Greek figure?” Sirius asked. “I don’t remember him.”

“That’s got to mean something,” Lily said. “Two Greek names in the clues?”

Sirius slid the parchment of anagrams away. “Sounds a little farfetched to me.”

“It’s the only way the anagram makes sense, though. And it must be Io. Oi is a ridiculous clue to leave.” Lily pursed her lips and pulled them to the side, studying the note.

Then she grinned again. She removed the paperweights off of Bode’s note, which rolled back up of its own accord, and unfurled it a bit so that just _OI_ was visible.

“See?” she said. “James said Bode got caught right before sending the message, right?”

“We think so, anyway,” Peter said.

“Now, if he added this as a last minute piece, and he wrote in the upper right corner, that’s strange. People write from the left.” She feigned holding a quill. “And see? My hand would crush the parchment roll with the way it’s curled up.” She flipped the parchment around, so the curl was on top. “He probably wrote this way, starting from the left. My hand doesn’t crush the message, and it’s more natural. And from this direction, it’s IO, not OI.”

“He could have been left-handed,” Sirius said.

Peter gave Lily a sympathetic look. “It’s not a lot to go on.”

Lily bit her lip and looked back at the map.

Then she sat up straight. “It is something, though. Because Io and Oceanus aren’t just both Greek. They’re connected through…oh, what _was_ it. They don’t overlap much, but they do in at least something.”

“Greeks…that’s myths, right?” Peter asked.

“No,” Lily breathed, eyes widening. “A play. They’re both in a Greek play.” She pointed a finger at the stars. “The cross of stars breaks the pattern, right?” Peter nodded hesitantly, and Lily continued, “And when I first noticed that, I immediately thought about star-crossed, a famous line from a famous play, so the crossed star might be trying to tell us to think about a play. Oh, _what_ is the name of the play with Oceanus?”

Sirius eyed her. “I don’t think I’ve read a play with him in it.”

“But Bode might have,” she said, mind racing. “He was Muggle-born, but his parents were able to afford sending him to Hogwarts, so they’re probably literate, so there’s a good chance he had some classical education. Including Greek plays and Shakespeare.”

“Even if they are all in some play, and the cross of stars means to look for a play at all, what are we supposed to do with that?”

“Would you stop being so negative? This is _something_ , isn’t it?”

“It does tie together some of the information,” Peter said reluctantly.

“Fine. Go wander off on that tangent.” Sirius drew the map away from Lily and leaned over it. “You lot work on that, I’ll actually work on solving this bloody thing.”

Peter looked at Lily, gave a meek smile of apology, and settled in to look at his list of anagrams again.

Lily bit back a sigh and rested her elbows on the table.

She’d read plenty of Greek and other classic works in her childhood, but now that she actually needed to remember them, the details evaded her. The ship had a limited selection of Greek works, but she pored through all of them, trying to recall where she’d encountered Io and Oceanus before.

But after a few days she’d found everything they had in the library and the common room and still hadn’t come any closer.

She stepped outside one afternoon after sitting in the library for hours, alone and stumped. Thick clouds blotted out the sun, but it was still better than hunching over the table, and she began to walk toward the starboard railing.

“Oi,” Dorcas called. Lily turned to see her standing at the top of the stairs to the quarterdeck. “Come here.”

Lily looked at her strangely. Dorcas didn’t seem overtly threatening, or at least not more than usual.

“I’m not going to hex you,” Dorcas said. “Unless you don’t come up here.”

“That’s not exactly an incentive.”

“For Merlin’s sake, Smith—”

“When did the crew decide on Smith? Did you take another vote?”

Dorcas lifted her wand. “Do you want to learn some new spells or not?”

“Oh,” Lily said. “Yes, of course.”

“Then come on.”

Lily slowly ascended the stairs, keeping an eye on Dorcas in case it really was a trap. But when Lily reached the deck, Dorcas spun around and marched over to the open space between the helm and the navigation room.

“I can’t stay long,” Lily said. “I’ve got to help with the map.”

“Sit with the map uselessly, you mean.”

“No. Sirius is doing that, _I’m_ trying. Teach me a spell so I can get back to it.”

Lily began moving into the stance Remus had taught her, arm raised, when her wand suddenly jerked out of her hand. It flew through the air and landed squarely in Dorcas’s waiting palm. Lily looked for a smug grin but found only disapproval.

“Didn’t Remus teach you the Shield Charm?” Dorcas said.

Lily pressed her lips together. “I’m working on it.”

Dorcas tossed Lily’s wand—why could no one on this crew simply hand wands over—and Lily picked it up, scowling, when she inevitably missed.

“Practice that,” Dorcas said.

“Why, so I can look as cool as Sirius? Pass, thanks.”

“Have it your way. If someone throws a wand to you in a duel, I won’t object when you take a second to pick up the wand and then get killed because you had to bend down.”

Lily brushed off imaginary dirt from her trousers. “All right, I’ll practice.”

Dorcas gave a short nod. “Do that. Now repeat after me. _Expelliarmus._ ”

\--

Few people were cut out for extended periods at sea, with nothing but miles of ocean stretching out in front of them. Lily didn’t count herself among them, and it soon became apparent that the rest of the crew was just as susceptible to cabin fever. Even Dorcas and Caradoc, who had been active members on James’s ship for a while, were only accustomed to the short jaunts to France.

“ _Must_ you chew with your mouth open?” Remus said to Peter one day.

“Stop shouting your spells,” Sirius told Dorcas. “They come out just as well if you’re not making us all deaf.”

“I said _starboard_ ,” Dorcas barked at Remus. “I don’t care if Sirius said otherwise, _starboard_.”

No one ever snapped at Marlene.

James’s insistence on tending watch during meals meant he missed most of the symptoms; the crew was too dispersed the rest of the day for him to notice, all able to seclude themselves alone or in pairs.

Tensions rose over several days, to the point where Dorcas drew her wand on Peter at dinner. Remus was able to deflate the situation, but from what Lily could gather, he didn’t know how to be a proper first mate. He must have understood the situation—Lily would have bet her candle he saw what she did—but he didn’t know the sea, and he didn’t know sailing. He probably didn’t know how to fix things.

But Lily did.

After a particularly bitter lunch, she went in search of James, and found him casting spells on the main deck rails.

“D’you have any musicians in your crew?” she asked.

“Er, we’re not exactly equipped for that. Are you looking for more lessons? And here I thought your time was plenty occupied.”

Lily gave him a flat look. “Your crew’s getting restless and they need a distraction. There’s a reason pirates keep musicians around, you know.”

“If by keep around you mean occasionally kidnap and hold hostage, yes, I’m familiar with the practice.”

“Trust me.” Lily leaned against the main mast. “It’s not because they’re appreciators of the fine arts. It does help. You need to do something—any sort of deliberate break—or someone’s going to lose a limb.”

“It’s not that bad.”

She raised her eyebrows.

“Is it?”

She nodded.

“Shit.”

“If nothing else, pots and pans are something, and we can have someone sing. Unless there are music spells I don’t know about that make all of that unnecessary.”

“Actually, I’ll get Algernon to fetch—no, it’s too big. I’ll go rummage around my dad’s drawer.”

He vanished into the library, and Lily waited, glancing around the ship. Sirius stood at the helm, and Lily let her eyes skip over him and up to the clouds. They were flat and thin today, patchy at best, but not enough to hold back the sun.

James reemerged a minute later holding a battered violin case, and set it on the ground in front of Lily. “It was my dad’s, but I don’t know any charms to make it go. Remus might, or Caradoc.”

“I’m stunned your talents don’t include playing an instrument.”

“I suppose the Lady Smith does?”

‘I’d play the piano for you if we had one. Unless you’ve been hiding your secret piano collection from me.”

“No secret pianos. There’s that whole secret orchestra store in the secret room off the magazine, but they don’t like being talked about behind their back, and they’ve got wicked tempers, so….”

Lily smiled.

“But yeah,” he said. “Music’s not something most wizard families worry about. Except. Well.”

“What?”

James’s eyes flicked up to Sirius, who caught James looking, paused, and took a step back out of view.

“Oi, Padfoot!” James called.

“No!”

“ _Pad_ foot.”

“Absolutely not!”

“Captain’s orders are to report to the main deck immediately.”

“Captain can shove that case up his arse.”

James scrambled to pick up the case. Lily frowned, but then she saw Sirius wave his wand out over the railing.

“ _Accio_!”

The case tried to fly out of James’s arms, but he held tight.

“I haven’t even asked you yet, you tosser,” James said.

“Consider your request prematurely denied!”

James heaved a sigh and marched up the stairs, Lily trailing behind him.

“Don’t tell me you’re shy,” Lily said, standing a bit behind James.

Sirius folded his arms. “I could play for the Queen if I wanted, but I’ve a permanent case of violin-loathing.”

“Just one night, Sirius,” James said. “I can’t believe you, a Marauder, would turn down an evening of entertainment. Do you no longer believe in merriment and joy? Did you or did you not sign up to be a purveyor of mischief?”

“Not at this price. Besides, you’re the one who said no fun.”

“I said none of the things we’d normally do because we don’t want to blow up the ship or catch the map on fire, not no fun.”

“Same thing. What’s life without the occasional explosion?”

“Padfoot.”

“I refuse.”

“I’ll push you overboard again.”

“Worth it.”

“Captain’s orders,” James said in mock apology.

Sirius scowled. “One night.”

“Thank you.”

“Never again.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“I’m going to go work on the map.”

“I’ll man the helm.”

Sirius glared at the violin case, still clutched in James’s arms, and stomped down the stairs. A moment later the library door slammed shut.

“He’s awfully touchy about that, isn’t he?” Lily said. “Even for him.”

James set down the case and ran a hand through his hair. “It’s his family. They made him learn it.”

“So did mine.”

“But your family didn’t disown you.”

“Well, no.”

“Yeah.” James loosely gripped the helm with one hand. “Don’t ever bring up his family if you can avoid it. He’s burned off the tapestry and everything, and anything that’s related to them….”

“Duly noted,” Lily said, although she didn’t follow the tapestry reference. “If the entertainment’s all settled, though, I suppose I should join him downstairs.”

“How’s the map coming along?”

She sighed. “We’re trying. Well, I’m trying my approach. Sirius wants to try something else, and Peter, to no one’s surprise, is going along with him. It doesn’t matter what I say, Sirius thinks I must be wrong.”

“He’s a bit pessimistic, yeah.”

“He’s a bit pessimistic the same way the ocean’s a bit deep.”

“He’s had a difficult life.”

Lily hadn’t had the easiest time either lately, but that didn’t mean she was being deliberately obtuse when it came to something important.

“You’ve got an idea, then?” James asked. “About the map?”

Lily explained her theory about the play, and he listened with his head ducked in concentration.

“It ties some things together,” he said. “But what to do with that lead….”

“I know.”

“I’ll stop by in a bit and take a look, if you like.”

“Thanks. If nothing else, it’ll keep Sirius quieter, I think.”

James grimaced. “We’ll see.”

“He likes you best of everyone.”

“Yes, but—it’s complicated. While Sirius is terrific at most Order missions, he’s shit at being on a ship, or cooped up anywhere for a long time. He’s not normally this irritable, I promise.”

“You seem to be handling things all right, even though from the sound of it you don’t usually go much further than France.”

“I’m more accustomed to it than everyone else. Growing up in it, and everything. Not that I don’t prefer land, honestly. But I do what I have to.”

“I’m certain if you wanted a change, you could do something else for the Order.”

“I’m not so sure, but I also haven’t asked. There aren’t many people who could step in for me on this ship.”

Lily could have argued more—she could always argue more—but she only knew what James had told her about their resistance, which wasn’t much at all.

“I suppose,” she said. “You’ll tell the others about tonight?”

“Will do. Now get to work, Smith.”

She grinned. “Aye aye, Captain.”

\--

“She’s no idea what she’s on about,” Sirius said.

“I think it sounds like something, which is, frankly, more than you’ve got.”

Lily stared down at the map, her eyes sore, and pretended she couldn’t hear them arguing in James’s cabin.

“So you’re going to listen to her crackpot theories?”

“I’m not going to dismiss them outright until there’s a better alternative.”

The door to the library flew open, banging against the bookshelf next to it, and Sirius stomped out to drop into a chair, scowling.

James emerged, one hand mussing up his hair, and joined them at the table. “Right, then. What can I do?”

Lily slid the map over to him. “Are you any good at Latin?”

“Pretty handy, yeah.”

“See if you can translate the map words. Peter’s done a lovely job, but everyone translates in their own way. A slightly different wording might be key.”

James saluted her and picked up a quill.

Sirius hunched over his parchment, concealing his work with his arm. Whatever he was attempting, it seemed to involve some sort of runes, and Lily left him to it, flipping through the stack of books in front of her.

The shadows in the library grew long around them, and eventually Peter returned from the crow’s nest.

She glanced over the English translations of the phrases that Peter had done, but none of them prompted any great insight, and she turned back to the map’s English phrase for lack of options.

_Where he lay fettered…._

“Where _who_ lay fettered?” she muttered. “Oceanus?”

Peter looked up. “Fetters are like chains, right?”

“Or bindings of any sort,” Lily said distractedly. Then she sat up in her chair, her eyes widening. “Oh, _bound_ , of course!”

“What?” Peter said warily.

“There’s a Greek play called _Prometheus Bound_ , and you’ll never guess which two Greek figures are in it.”

James looked at her, intrigued. “Really?”

“Yes.” She shot Sirius a winning smile. “I’m not making things up here. Some of us are actually trying to stop What’s His Face from learning about his downfall, you know.”

“All right, so they’re in a play,” Sirius said. “What are we supposed to do with that? It’s meaningless.”

“No,” Lily said smugly. “It’s not, because it’s a play about prophecies.”

James’s eyebrows shot up. “ _Oh_.”

“Oh,” Peter echoed.

“Yes, _oh_ ,” Lily said. “I’m not sure how we turn that into a location, but don’t tell me that’s meaningless.”

“It’s more than we’ve got otherwise.” James turned to Sirius. “At least hear it out, yeah?”

“What happens in the play?” Peter asked.

“Zeus,” Lily said, “the king of the Greek gods, chains this bloke named Prometheus to a rock because he claimed to have given humans all sorts of things they didn’t have before: fire, medicine, maths. Loads of things. Bit of a pretentious bloke, really.”

James gave a thin smile. “Sounds like Bode.”

“Zeus was furious that Prometheus did all that and decided to chain him up forever. Only Prometheus could see the future. He knew what would ultimately defeat Zeus, but he refused to tell him, even when he was damned to eternal torture.”

“Sounds a lot like Bode,” James said slowly.

“If Bode _was_ a pretentious Muggle-born who could find out the future, he probably loved this play.”

“Great,” Sirius said. “So he liked a play.”

Lily fixed him with a disapproving look before turning to James.

“Well,” she said, “we know the map must tell us how to get to the island, right? So he’s got to give us a starting point and a direction, we know that, and somehow the clues are on here, but I think they’re in the context of the play.”

Sirius grumbled, but James smiled.

“Sounds brilliant,” James said. “Exactly the sort of thing he would’ve done.”

“We have all the pieces,” Lily continued. “Bode made the clues very obvious to notice, except the dots. But we need to take the pieces and relate them back to _Prometheus Bound_.” She grabbed one of her pieces of parchment with her own list of starting point, direction, and distance options. “The star-crossed clue we can eliminate because I think that’s mostly to point us toward a play. The one-letter words are giving us the name Oceanus to give us this specific play, and so is Io. And so what’s left on the map? If we take those bits out of consideration, what’s left on the map besides the actual islands?”

“The Latin phrases,” Peter said.

Lily nodded. “How to tie them into Prometheus Bound, I’m not sure.”

“You’re quite dim,” Sirius said, “do you know that?”

“ _Sirius_ ,” James said.

Sirius didn’t seem to be attacking, though, instead speaking very matter-of-factly. “You got to a Greek play you haven’t read in years and you lost it now?”

“What?” Lily said uncertainly.

“I’ve looked at those lines plenty. They read in a distinct style in English – your translation is closer to mine,” he told James. “ _It’s harsh not to obey this fate_. _Drive him to a fresh pursuit._ They’re short but clearly a bit poetic.”

“And?” James asked.

“I think— _if_ Lily is right, which I still don’t fully believe—they could be references to lines from the play.”

“But the phrases are in Latin, not Greek,” James said.

Peter looked hopeful. “Greek and Latin are both ancient languages?”

“It could be something like that,” Lily said. “Or it’s a way of hiding it with the words that gave us Oceanus.”

“It’s something,” James told Sirius. “And, as we’ve established, I’m happy to take that over nothing.”

Lily tapped a finger on the table. “You don’t happen to have a copy of _Prometheus Bound_ on board, do you? I haven’t found one.”

“No, but we can talk to Mad-Eye and see if he can find a copy somewhere.”

Sirius jotted down something on his parchment. “Or more likely Catherine,” he said absently, and then he grimaced. “Or not, I suppose.”

James’s eyes softened. “He’ll find someone, I’m sure. But good work, all of you. I think we’re getting somewhere.”

Peter sighed. “Finally.”

\--

“What do you mean, no practice tonight?” Marlene said. “The weather’s fine, and we’re both free.”

“We’re all having a night off.” Lily leaned against the main deck rail. Several candles hovered above them, their warm, flickering light casting shadows across the deck. “We need it.”

“Oh. We are?” A note of mild panic slipped into her voice. “You lot have fun with that, but I’ll pass, thanks.”

She gave a strained smile and disappeared into the common room, only to reemerge not half a minute later, Dorcas’s hand propelling her forward.

“We’ll make the boys dance with each other,” Dorcas assured her. “They can learn how hard it is to dance backwards.”

That did seem to perk Marlene up some, and Lily smiled at Dorcas, who pretended not to see, instead picking a snack off the tray Caradoc had brought up.

The crew still had a certain stiffness to them, standing about awkwardly while Sirius tuned his violin, a few sharp notes ringing out across the ship. Algernon sat at his feet studying him and flicking his tail against the deck.

Within a few minutes, Sirius struck up the first song, a fast-paced, cheerful number. He’d looked annoyed since he’d picked up the case, but apparently he took enough pride in his work not to let it affect the song, which came out quick and clear.

Lily nudged Marlene. “Why don’t you dance with Remus?”

“Oh,” Marlene said, looking nearly wild and hiding it terribly. “I’m not really interested in dancing.”

There had to be something that would pull Marlene out of—whatever she was in, but perhaps dancing wasn’t it. Still, she couldn’t stand the image of Marlene sitting alone while the rest of them tried to have fun.

“We’re not nearly drunk enough for that,” Dorcas said. “Oi, Caradoc!”

\--

Alcohol, of course, helped the mood tremendously.

Lily had to start off the dancing, accompanied by Caradoc—acceptable as a dancer, but not marvelous—and then she shared another one with Peter while Caradoc took up with Dorcas.

Remus moved in next to Marlene, who stood with her arms folded, her foot tapping anxiously and not out of sync with the music. Lily caught Peter watching them, too, and shared a sympathetic look with him. She pretended not to notice when he stepped on her feet, forcing a smile to get through the pain.

Having two dancing couples made the affair much less strange, and Lily began to regret her clothing choice; twirling in trousers was not half as fun as in a full-bodied dress. She let her hair down instead, relishing the way it flared out around her.

The night drew on, punctuated only by the occasional silence when Sirius rested. They didn’t manage to convince two of the men to dance together until Caradoc’s punchbowl was nearly empty, at which point Remus was smiling stupidly enough to dance with Peter. Remus’s toes would probably need Healing in the morning, but he didn’t seem to mind, gently correcting Peter when needed.

Afterwards Remus swung Dorcas around, her thin mouth almost smiling.

Lily even convinced Algernon to join in—he’d been enjoying a bowl of cream Caradoc had brought him—and got him to walk opposite her in a small circle. She threw her head back and laughed when he stopped and looked confused, and she picked him up in her arms instead. He only tolerated a few spins before leaping to the ground.

Whatever Caradoc had put in the punch, it was potent. Lily felt very warm, the cool evening breeze a welcome relief against her face.

She took a song off, leaving Remus and Dorcas to dance alone, and stood next to a stiff Marlene.

Marlene wasn’t being any fun at all, though—which she was entitled to, of course, but it was hard to be around someone grieving when Lily felt so free—and Lily let her eyes wander up.

James’s shadow lurked in the crow’s nest overhead. Someone always had to keep watch, now more than ever.

He was probably thirsty up there.

Obviously he needed a drink.

Lily dumped the last of the punch in a cup but then stared, perplexed, at the shroud to the main mast. Climbing would be nearly impossible with one hand clutching the cup.

“Ahoy,” James called down. “Everything all right?”

“Peachy,” she shouted. “Brought you some punch.”

“Brilliant! I’ll bring it up.”

The cup tugged out of her hand, levitating up around the shroud, until a hand sneaked out from the crow’s nest to grab it.

“Feel like taking a look from up here?” he shouted.

“Pass, thanks!”

“You scared?”

“No!”

“I dare you to come up.”

“I’m not a child, James. You can’t _dare_ me into something.”

“That’s fine. I know you’re afraid.”

“I am _not_.”

“I’ll make assumptions until you prove me wrong.”

She eyed the shroud and took a deep breath. It would be worth it to prove him wrong.

The punch got her up most of the way, hands and feet confidently climbing the web, and Sirius struck up a cheery, familiar tune that made her smile.

Foolishly, she looked back down at Caradoc and Dorcas twirling beneath her, and suddenly the ship seemed to sway even more than normal beneath her.

“Stuck?” James asked. He didn’t have to shout now, not when she was so close.

“No,” she said, although her hands seemed glued to the net.

“Come on, you’re nearly here.”

“Don’t patronize me.”

“I’m not, honest.”

She locked her eyes on his face, where the moonlight reflected off his glasses, and felt herself moving. Soon enough she was pulling herself over the railing, her heart racing.

It was snug with two people in the crow’s nest, but not impossibly tight. The wind threw her hair in her face and she shoved it away, hands moving to tie it into a loose braid.

It gave her a focus, at least, playing with her hair.

“Don’t you want to look around?” he asked.

Lily looked up at him and only him.

He’d put on that stupid, three-cornered pirate hat—and looked damned dashing in it—and he hadn’t shaved that morning. He had just enough stubble for her to notice, and oh, God, it shouldn’t have made her knees wobble that way.

“I’m all right,” she lied.

He eyed her and took a sip of his punch. “I didn’t actually think you were scared.”

“I know.”

“But you are.”

She gripped the rail behind her. “No.”

“I’m not judging. Everyone’s afraid of something.”

“It’s not safe up here.”

“Oh, I suppose—there’s a spell, you know. To catch us.”

It should have been a relief to hear that, but it was hard to trust the idea of something she couldn’t see.

“That’s all right,” she said, falsely calm, “but I’m not scared.”

“You’re about to break that railing if you hold on any tighter. It’s all right to be nervous.”

“I’m not.”

“Must be me, then, if it’s not the heights. I get that a lot.”

It was the heights, she told herself. She held on tight to the railing, enough to feel the individual grains of wood against her fingertips.

And the punch. It was also definitely the punch.

Definitely not the cocky smirk on his face.

Not at all.

“You’re missing out on the dancing,” she said.

“Yeah, well, they needed it more than I did.”

“You’ve been cooped up as long as them. I find it hard to believe you’re not restless yourself.”

“Different sort of restless, I guess.”

It would be easy to take that restless comment and run with it in a different direction, but he had turned her down last time. Although….

Technically she wasn’t a captive any longer. She was a passenger waiting for the next logical place to get off.

He could have changed his mind. He’d turned her down, but not, from all appearances, for lack of wanting.

“You know,” she said, letting her mouth curve into a coy smile, “if you do find yourself… _restless_ …I’m more than happy to show you some maneuvers for that. I guarantee relief.”

“Lily,” he said, exasperated, and it shouldn’t have stung her as much as it did. She wasn’t in love with him or anything, but it didn’t make sense, he always seemed—

She turned around and leaned over the edge, fear momentarily forgotten as she focused on her burning cheeks.

“It’s not that you’re not gorgeous or brilliant,” he said, “it’s just—you’re still stuck, aren’t you?”

“Not forever. Not like before.”

“And I feel—like I’d be taking advantage.”

“Remind me which one of us is instigating and then talk to me about advantages.”

“You’re probably still feeling pressured, even if—”

She whirled on him, her mind still spinning long after her body had stopped.

“Oh, if I don’t know it?” she said. “You’re right, because I’m a woman, I have all these feelings, I must not be able to distinguish them—”

“What? Where—that’s not at all—I’d just feel like a cad.”

“Maybe other women made you feel that way. I never make men feel like cads. Unless they deserve it, of course.”

“And besides, it’s just—I’ll drop you off in Portugal or wherever, and then what? I’ll never see you again.”

“That doesn’t mean we can’t settle our restlessness now.”

“Search for treasure? Isn’t that what we agreed on?”

“Call it what you like. It’s not like we’re doing any of them, apparently.”

“Well, I’ve got one treasure on my mind, and you know perfectly well what that is.”

Lily rolled her eyes, even though he couldn’t see them. “Right, then. Now that I’m done throwing myself at you—”

“Offering treasure?”

She gave him a flat look. “I’m climbing back down.”

She tried to swing a leg over the nest, but the other leg wobbled a little, and she clutched onto the rail. Strong hands grabbed onto her shoulders, steadying her.

“Wotcher,” he said. “I’m not sure you’re in any shape to climb down.”

“There are spells to catch me,” Lily said, trying to get her leg over again, anything to get away from him and the awkwardness she’d wrought.

“Er,” he said, “about that.”

Lily froze, her foot on the rail. “What?”

“I may have…exaggerated.”

Her hands clung to the wood, and she sat petrified, the idea of movement a distant dream. “ _Exaggerated_?”

“Well…lied. Lied is probably the more appropriate word there.” He sighed. “C’mere.”

His hands pulled her back, but she fought, not wanting to move an inch lest she lose balance and fall to her death.

“Lily, let go of the railing.”

“I don’t see why I should.”

“At least bring down your leg.”

“It’s fine where it is.”

“Lily.”

She ignored him.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, you’re being ridiculous.”

“You’re a liar!”

“Merlin, I was just trying to calm you down, all right?”

“ _By lying._ ”

“You know, there’s this saying about a pot, and a kettle, stop me if you’ve heard it—”

“Pirate,” Lily reminded him.

“Yeah, fine, we’re both liars, but you should really maybe stand up before you lose your balance—”

“Oh, thanks _so_ much for reminding me that’s possible—”

“Like you’re not already thinking about it. Now, come _on_ ,” he said, and he pulled, the weight of his whole body enough to pry her away from the rail.

She stumbled backwards into him, her balance completely lost. He took a step back to catch her sudden weight, and then two, and Lily shrieked, certain they’d fall backwards over the rail and die and then get eaten by sharks—

But they stopped, his body hitting the rail behind him, his arms now somehow wound around her chest, one hand grasping her left breast.

“Gotcha,” he breathed.

“Everything all right up there?” someone shouted from below.

“Fine!” James called.

“Not fine,” Lily muttered. She didn’t want to move. Only because she might die, she told herself, and not because she was in James’s arms, her back flush against the lean line of his body. He smelled like sweat and salt and cat, but not in an unpleasant way.

“We’re _fine_ ,” he told her.

“I’m climbing down.”

“Are you now.”

She glared at nothing. “Maybe not right now.”

“As I thought.” He started to pull his arms free, and Lily’s hands grasped onto him, although his hand dropped from her breast onto her stomach.

“No,” she said quickly.

“No?”

“I’m feeling dizzy. You’d better hold onto me. Or I’ll die. And get eaten by sharks.”

“Well, if it’s sharks we’re worrying about now,” he said, amusement low in his voice, “then I definitely should hang on.”

“Good.”

“Only because you asked.”

“I insist.”

“All right, then,” he said softly. “If you insist.”

The summer wind brushed against Lily’s face, and it was all right that she was on the verge of falling to her death because James wouldn’t let her go.

He was a good person. Perhaps one of the best people she’d ever met.

He wouldn’t let her fall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That wonderful piece of art is by Zeina, aka cinnamonskittles on deviantart. My other friend Kayla drew a comic of a pre-story scene that may shed some light on pieces of this chapter. You can see that here: http://fleamontpotter.tumblr.com/post/80116779612/what-the-plank-incident-really-was-a-bit-of


	14. Unwelcome Invitations

Sirius entered the library from James’s cabin, shaking his head. “The only phrase from the map they could find in _Prometheus Bound_ was _t_ _yrannus_ _de_ _orum_ , the tyrant of the gods.”

Peter frowned. “So…what do we do with that?”

Sirius settled in across the table from Lily. “No idea.”

“Well,” she said, “at least it seems certain that _Prometheus Bound_ is somehow related. There’s no way that’s a coincidence.”

Sirius inclined his head. “And that gets rid of the Latin phrases, the Latin words, the English phrase, and the shapes.”

“Leaving us with no obvious clues? That doesn’t seem right. Unless some of the clues are clues twice over.”

“The Latin phrases and the Latin words were pretty clear,” Sirius mused. “The English phrase and the cross were a little more subtle. Doesn’t the English phrase duplicate the work of the Oceanus and Io clues?”

Peter leaned forward, resting his chin on his hand. “Why is it in English and not Latin?”

“I suppose it’s meant to stand out from the other clues,” Lily said. “It’s unrelated to the others?”

“Well,” Peter said hesitantly, “we’re looking for a starting point and a direction. ‘Where he lay fettered’ sounds like it could be a starting point.”

Sirius looked to Lily. “Could it be that simple?”

“Possibly,” she said. “It could refer to the rock where Prometheus was bound, but that rock wasn’t anywhere near the Azores.”

“Then are we going the wrong way?” Peter asked. “Maybe the island we want is closer to Greece.”

“No,” Sirius said, “there was never any question that the island’s in the Azores.”

“So what could the English phrase be trying to tell us?” Lily sat back in her chair. “I think it makes sense that it’s trying to help us find a specific location.”

“It could be the endpoint,” Sirius said. “The direction we’re supposed to go toward, not start from.”

Lily nodded to herself.

“So it’s not the real place Prometheus was fettered,” Peter said.

“Prometheus wasn’t bound anywhere famous.” Sirius leaned his chair back on two legs. “We couldn’t chase it, even if we knew the Island of Prophecies was in Greece.”

Lily tapped her fingers on the table in an uneven rhythm and studied the map in front of her. The ‘he’ in the phrase had to refer to Prometheus. The only other person mentioned was Oceanus, and he had never been fettered, at least as far as Lily remembered.

But as Sirius had pointed out, the myths never focused on where Zeus had bound Prometheus. The phrase was still a clue, not a specific historical reference; it had to be pointing them to somewhere in the Azores, somewhere obvious once they knew what they were looking for.

“But I wonder….” Lily paused for a moment. “If Prometheus had been bound in the Azores—hypothetically—where would Zeus have done it?”

She slid the map into the middle of the table, and Peter and Sirius leaned in to look. Lily’s eyes flicked around the islands, reading the handwriting. Horta, Pico, Ponte Delgada—

Lily’s eyes snapped up to Sirius at the same moment he looked up at her, his face alight.

Her mouth curved up at one end. “Angra de Heroismo.”

“Any idea what Angra means?”

“Not a clue, but Prometheus brought fire to humans. He’s definitely a hero, or he would have been to Bode, anyway. If he were bound in the Azores, it would make sense to do it at the Heroism…place. Angra might be port. Point. Cove. Something like that. But I think it’s safe to guess that Heroismo is a cognate.”

“So assuming that _is_ the starting point,” Sirius said, “then we’ve only got to look for a direction.”

“It seems that way.”

“So that’s it?” Peter said, eyes bouncing back and forth between Lily and Sirius.

“No idea,” Sirius said easily.

“Could still be the endpoint,” Lily said.

Sirius nodded, tilting his chair back again. “But if it is the starting point….”

“It’s got to be either the starting or ending point, I think.”

“What do we have left to work with, then? That’s the English phrase taken care of.”

“Unless there are two spots he could be bound, and we have to draw a line between them, and follow that—I don’t know Portuguese well enough to recognize most of the words on here.”

“We could get Moody to translate some of them into English. See if anything is a reference to a tyrant, or Greece, or something.”

“It’s worth a try, although we’re only guessing.”

“But hey,” Sirius said, grinning, “we’re getting somewhere, aren’t we?”

“Yeah.” Lily smiled back at him. “We are.”

\--

After dinner Dorcas beckoned Lily to the quarterdeck for another spell lesson. They’d moved on from _Expelliarmus_ to _Stupefy_ , which proved to be much harder to cast, and not only because they didn’t have a volunteer target. They focused instead on Lily’s enunciation and wandwork. For practice she’d aim spell after spell out over the railing, but it was impossible to tell whether it would work on a person.

In between her lesson and Marlene’s, Lily sat on the quarterdeck stairs, watching James messing with the main sails.

Dorcas acted like she owned the ship sometimes, and her familiarity with it certainly showed, but it was truly James’s ship, and not only by law. He scaled the ropes and bounded up stairs and hopped down ladders as naturally as a fox darted through a forest, his footfalls sure and confident.

He’d said he preferred land, but time could make any place a home.

Not long before the evening shift change, Caradoc wandered up from the galley and joined her on the stairs.

“Beautiful night.” He rested his elbows on his knees. “How are you?”

“Oh, I’m all right. Learning to Stun people. Or rather, Stun the air.”

“Doesn’t the air mind?”

Lily glanced sideways to catch his lips twitching, and smiled at him. “I can’t imagine it notices.”

“I think people underestimate the wind. It tears down trees and walls and mountains, eventually.”

“And brings us closer to the Azores.”

Caradoc nodded. “James has always been a natural in the air. He used to fly for the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Even became captain of the team at the end.”

“He does seem light on his feet,” Lily said, although she didn’t quite follow his train of thought.

“He’s available, you know.”

“Sorry?”

“James isn’t involved with anyone. No one’s waiting for him back home."

“I didn’t—all right.”

“I thought you might like to know.”

“I hope he hasn’t got anyone. Not for me, but—” She couldn’t tell him she’d already kissed James.

Except she could, actually. He wouldn’t spread it around the ship.

“Believe me,” she said. “If he were interested, he’s had plenty of opportunity.”

“Oh?” he said, so innocently Lily nearly believed he didn’t find it terribly fascinating. 

“He’s a terrific kisser,” she said matter of factly. “But that one was stolen, at best.”

Caradoc looked out at the ocean and tried, unsuccessfully, to hide a smile. “You’d have an excellent story of how you met.”

“We would, I suppose. But there’s not much story. He’s not interested in captives, the noble bastard.”

“I thought you were only a passenger now.”

“So did I,” Lily sighed. 

“Well, he’s very focused on his mission.”

“I know. And I’m glad he’s doing what he’s doing. What you all are.”

Caradoc gave her a kind look. “You’re helping, too, you know. I hear you’re making progress with the map.”

“Not enough. Sirius says we’re only a few days away from the Azores.”

“We can always take port for a while to figure things out.”

“Yes, but—I think—I mean, I don’t know much about it, obviously, but won’t What’s His Face have people all over these islands? I would, if I were him.”

“Very likely. We’ve got some Cloaking Charms on the ship, but yes, there would be some risk to sitting in a harbor.”

“We’ll be better off if we can head right to the island, and hope they haven’t figured out what we have.”

He smiled without humor. “It all comes back to hope, doesn’t it?”

There was the hope that Lily could help them figure out the map. The hope that they would arrive at their destination unscathed. The hope that they could keep What’s His Face from learning the prophecy.

And, of course, the biggest hope of all.

“Do you…do you think you can do it?” Lily asked quietly. “Take back the government from What's His Face, I mean.”

Caradoc hung his head, and smoothed his hair down with one hand before answering. “I really don’t know. It’s been almost three years. I’ve started to wonder. Mostly the things I hear—they’re not good, Lily. So many of my friends from Hogwarts are dead, or missing, or doing—they’re doing things they wouldn’t normally do. Things I don’t think they want to do but they don’t know what other choice they have. Everyone is so scared all the time.”

“You don’t seem scared.”

“We’re in the middle of the ocean. It’s harder to be afraid of him here. But I am. We all are. Not just for who he is, but what he does to people.”

Lily grimaced.

“The worst part is,” he added, “I’m starting to forget what it was like Before. What it was like when some people just disliked me. Now they want to imprison me. Or kill me. That's what scares me more than anything. The children who are growing up in this, and don’t know any other way of being. I see them coming through on our ship when we bring them to France. They won’t know what it’s like to live in a world where people like us are a part of English wizarding society.”

It was hard to imagine the ship full of children, of people displaced by a war. So often the crew acted in a way that really could be mistaken for pirates, telling stories and doing everything they could to keep busy.

But there was a battle. The evidence rode with them at this very moment, trapped between the sea and a single, surmountable door.

Lily just wasn’t a part of it.

She turned to Caradoc. “What do you think are the chances that I’d get caught if I went back to England again?”

“I think you’d do all right if you didn’t intentionally cast magic. But we know at least one Death Eater knows who you are, and accidental magic happens, so there’s at least some chance.”

Lily folded her arms over her chest. “I’d like to go home again. Someday.”

“Well, we’ll keep working on making it safe for you.”

She fidgeted, and looked away from him. “Thanks. I—appreciate it.”

But her gaze was drawn back to the ship when Marlene’s head popped up from the gun deck.

“Looks like my break is over,” Lily said, standing up.

“She hasn’t spoken to you about it, has she?”

Lily shook her head. “You?”

“No. I tried, but….”

“Same.”

Caradoc stood up and stepped down a few stairs before turning back. “Good luck,” he said, and Lily wondered if he meant with Marlene, or the map, or—or with James, possibly.

Or maybe he meant all three.

“Thanks,” she said.

Marlene ducked into the library to get the cutlass from where James had left it for her, and met Lily on the main deck for her lesson. With the moon a faint sliver in the sky, she charmed candles to hang in the air above them, and Lily watched her practice advancing and retreating across the deck, her blade flashing in the candlelight.

Marlene had been there for Lily when she’d felt isolated and attacked, and hadn’t even seemed to resent Lily for lying and attempted thievery. Even if Lily hadn’t felt she owed her for that, common decency would have demanded that Lily try to do what she could for Marlene.

But Lily could only push Marlene so far, and if Marlene didn’t want help….

After much longer than Lily would have tolerated performing the same moves again and again, Marlene finally took a break.

“Marlene,” Lily said delicately, as Marlene stretched her arms. “I wanted to know…if you were okay. I’m—I’m worried about you, all right? We all are.”

Marlene shrugged, gave a small smile, and slid back into an advancing stance. “I’m fine.”

“But, I mean, I’m not…I’m not so sure about that.”

Marlene studied her feet, her smile growing thin.

“I know we don’t know each other that well,” Lily said, “but please. If you need anything at all, let me know, all right?”

Marlene looked up again and shook her hair back, false smile renewed. “All I want to talk about is a new defensive position.”

Lily bit back a sigh. “In that case, raise your arm over your head….”

\--

She’d thought that after her very embarrassing show in the crow’s nest, James might have started avoiding her, but he seemed to be pretending it hadn’t happened, and she was more than happy to play along. Even if she sometimes recalled, foggy though the memory was, how perfectly his arms had fit around her.

“I hear there’s terrific progress being made on the map,” James said one cool night, joining Lily in the common room. He dropped into a chair—not on the sofa next to her, she noticed, out of reach for her to do anything idiotic like touch him. It was probably best that way, but her heart twinged anyway.

She dog-earred her place and set aside her novel – something French to give her mind a reprieve. “Sirius can actually be helpful every now and then.”

“Anything I can do?”

“Maybe. I know you’ve mostly got spellbooks in your cabin, but do you have any books by Greek authors hiding in there? I want to see if I can find a reference for the other Latin phrases in another play.”

“Most of the books are from my parents, so I’m not entirely sure what’s in there, but I’ll take a look around.” He adjusted his glasses. “Thanks for helping, by the way. I know you’re not obligated to do anything, but obviously things have improved dramatically with you in the room.”

Lily looked down at her lap, her chest suddenly tight. “I mean, Peter could’ve…no, I don’t know what you would’ve done. He’s sweet enough, but I don’t know why you put him in charge of this.”

James glanced toward the door. “Well, only because…the others were a lot better about learning the sailing spells. He can pick things up, I know he can, but he just needs a lot of time, and we didn’t have any. I figured he’d have plenty of time on the trip to get into the map. He’s smarter than he thinks he is.”

“Sirius isn’t exactly an encouraging sort of bloke to pair with him.”

“No, it’s—Remus might’ve been better, but he’s busy as first mate, and Dorcas is out of the question, and Caradoc’s got no time, and Marlene….”

“Right.”

“I can do the navigation work for Sirius most of the time, so it was him or nothing.”

“I wish we weren’t so pressed for time—especially now that Sirius is sort of working with me—but taking port’s dangerous, and we’ve no way of knowing how far the Death Eaters are in solving the map. I mean, we don’t, do we?”

James shook his head. “We don’t hear much about their progress. Wish we did. I assume they’re struggling if they sent someone after us, but that was almost two weeks ago.”

“They wouldn’t have sent someone to attack us if they were so close, though, would they?”

“No idea.”

If What’s His Face truly abhorred all things Muggle, he probably would have had a hard time solving the map. Assuming Lily and the others were on the right track, of course. But What’s His Face could be well read, or at least some of his followers could be. If Severus was working for him, who knew how many other half-bloods were helping him, or purebloods who didn’t mind Muggle literature. Sirius couldn’t be the only one.

And if What’s His Face really had attracted that many people to his cause—or terrified them into joining—they’d probably crack the map eventually, if they hadn’t already.

And things would keep on the way they were.

Lily looked at James. “How many…how many people do you think What’s His Face has killed?”

“Er, in what timeframe?”

“Ever.”

James cocked his head. “That he’s personally offed? Hard to say. But at his direction? Hundreds, at least.”

“More than you’ve taken to France.”

“Easily.”

She folded her arms tightly over her chest. “How do you live with that?”

“It’s sort of—you try not to think about it, really.” His mouth pulled to one side. “It’s going on all the time, and it’s worse when you’re in England. You wouldn’t know—you’ve been elsewhere, and not in proper wizard society, but it’s not—things used to be so different, everyone says. Maybe things weren’t so different when I was at Hogwarts and I didn’t realize it…. Hogwarts just makes you feel safe.”

“Whatever things were like, they had to have been better than with What’s His Face in charge.”

“Probably. I like to think they were.” He looked over at the windows, the candelight a flickering reflection in the darkness.

“At least you’re doing something about it,” Lily said. “You know that there’s hope.”

He waved a hand. “Yeah, keeping him from a prophecy. I’m not—I’ve been told it’s critical, that this mission is of the utmost importance. Personally I’m not entirely sold on Divination at all. Seems like a load of bollocks to me.”

“You trust the people who sent you, though, and they must believe in Divination.”

“Yeah. They do, all right. So I’ll do this, and then go back to shuttling refugees.”

“And everyone else goes back to what? Dorcas and Caradoc with you, the others…bringing you refugees?”

“Nah. At least, I don’t think so. I mean, the others aren’t really allowed to tell me what they do. But they—Sirius has new scars, you know. I don’t know what from. He’s sworn to secrecy so I won’t ask. But whatever they’re doing is a lot more dangerous than what I do.”

“You’ve got wanted posters,” Lily reminded him. “You’re clearly a threat.”

“They’re trying to stop us, but it’s not their top priority. We’ve had pretty good success at beating the Death Eaters that do come after us. I think we’d all be dead or in jail right now if wizards knew anything about ships. And maybe that day’s coming.”

“The Death Eater in the orlop deck knew where to hide on the ship.”

“Well, hiding’s one thing. Anyone can hide, especially if no one’s watching. Wonder what she would’ve done if you hadn’t knocked Sirius out and got me off into the city….” He shook his head, as though trying to clear his thoughts. “What about you, eh? What’ll you do when this mission is over and I drop you off in Portugal? Earl’s daughter, on the run from the law.”

“And pirate’s daughter, thank you.”

“You take after your mum, then? I’ve been told I do.”

She nodded.

James leaned forward in his chair, so sweet and caring and curious. “What was she like?”

“It’s—it’s funny, the things I remember,” she said, one hand idly playing with her pendant. “I wish I’d written down what I remembered about them, when it happened. I remember her smile more than anything. I think she missed being a pirate. I didn’t think about it then, but when I remember her…. I think she did.”

“How did your parents even meet?”

“He was on his way to Belgium—some official business or something—and her crew raided his ship right before they landed. She thought he was fit and followed him on land. They didn’t—they always said they’d tell me more when I was older. I wish I knew more about it.”

“She liked the ocean, then?”

“Loved it. And I do, too, you know. But I’m a bloody awful pirate.”

He quirked his eyebrows. “And here I thought you weren’t a pirate.”

“A pirate has a crew. I tried being a real pirate, once.” She slanted a smile at him. “Hated it.”

“So you _are_ a pirate.”

“ _Was_ a pirate. For a few months, anyway. Had to bully some captain into letting me on board, but I was young, and I thought….”

He nodded for her to continue.

“My sister was always more like my father. Liked the dresses and the customs and all that. I was Mum’s favorite, and I assumed…I don’t know why. But it had always sounded so great, being a pirate. The air and the sea and the crew and the treasure.”

“What happened?”

She gave him a plaintive look. “Pirates smell bloody awful.”

He threw his head back in a laugh, and settled deeper into the chair. His gasses sat a bit askew but he didn’t seem to care, clasping his hands behind his head.

“And they’re cruel sometimes.” She pulled her feet up to sit cross-legged. “Even the nice ones. And having to deal with the _politics_ of the ship—who got how many shares. It was exhausting. Plus the food’s terrible.”

“Right. No preserving spells.”

“I made some friends. That was nice. They taught me basic swordplay – my mum taught me some things like pickpocketing and the pirate’s code, but never swordplay. And I liked traveling. But I couldn’t stick with it. They’re so—they’re willing to kill people, and I’m not, and—I dunno why my mum liked it so much.”

Lily wrenched her hand down from her pendant, clasping her hands in her lap and avoiding James’s eyes.

“You’re neither the Countess nor the pirate,” he supplied.

“I’m not really anything. I don’t—I mean, it’s silly, but I don’t like thinking of myself as a thief, either. That seems so—so malicious. But mostly I like what I do. I meet loads of interesting people. I travel wherever I like, whenever I like.”

“So you’re going to keep doing that, then?” He sat up straighter. “When I drop you off in Portugal, you’ll go wandering around from ship to ship?”

“Probably.”

He regarded her strangely. “And that’s it?”

“I thought—I thought I might stop with pirate ships, after this. Less risk of getting trapped at sea.”

He kept _looking_ at her, head tilted.

“What?” she said.

“It’s just…why do you—why are you wasting your life stealing?”

“I’m not— _wasting my life_? I’m making a living, James. Everyone’s got to, somehow.”

“But you’re clever,” he said, one hand running through his hair, “and you’re resourceful, and you’re just…stealing. All of that for _thievery_.”

“What else am I supposed to do, exactly?” Her feet found the floor again. “Please, tell me, I’m dying to know.”

“Anything else? It’s just—you’re not—I don’t understand why you do that.”

“My parents taught me how to be a lady and how to be a pirate, but like you said, I’m not really either, am I?”

“That doesn’t mean you can’t do something else at all.”

“You’re so—you thought I was uneducated, when I got on board, and I hope you know better now. But you’re just as ignorant about Muggles as I am about wizards, so I really don’t know where you think you get off—”

“I’ve been playing Muggle in France and England for more than a year, thank you—”

“Oh, and that qualifies you to talk about it, does it? Living on your ship, with your wand and your crew—let me tell you, I’m not exactly swimming in a sea of options here. When I got off that pirate ship, I had almost no money and nowhere to go and—what was I supposed to do? Starve? Prostitute myself?”

“No, I dunno, there must be _something_ , I mean, you’re an Earl’s daughter—”

“You don’t see it at all, do you? I doubt you’ve ever—being a woman in the Muggle world means everything, all right? Decent society will _always_ shortchange me for being a woman, but I get by without them. I try not to do wrong by too many people and I don’t hurt them and I take just enough to live.” She looked down at her lap. “Wizards...you don’t have that same problem with women, from what I’ve seen, anyway. But apparently I can’t join your world either because my parents are Muggles. So where am I supposed to go, James? What other option do I have?”

She could feel the heat radiating from her flushed cheeks, her heart hammering in her chest, but when she looked back to James, he wasn’t upset. He’d moved to the edge of his seat, his hands resting on his knees, and he caught her eye.

“Come with us,” he said.

“To the Azores? I’m already booked for that journey, regardless of what I want.”

“No, after that. Come back to England with us. Help us fight You Know Who.”

“They’ll kill me in England if they catch me. Your crew told me as much.”

He shrugged. “It’s a risk, yeah. You won’t be entirely safe there. But isn’t it worth it?”

“Right, then. I’ll just pack up with my mounds of savings you found in my bag and sail back to London. I mean, where would I live? How would I pay for things?”

“There’s a safehouse for people like you with nowhere to go. Room and board provided. You can do the work you wanted done – fighting You Know Who. Why not come back?”

“Because—because that’s not my _life_.”

“So you’re going to run.”

“I’m not _running_. I’m just doing what I do.”

“Come back to England, and come fight with the Order. Look what you’ve done for the map – you could really help, even if your spellwork is still a bit rough.”

It wasn’t that the thought hadn’t occurred to her, but she hadn’t—she couldn’t.

“James, that’s just…. It’s not going to happen,” she concluded.

He nearly leapt to his feet. “Fine.”

“You’re the one who told me not to go back.”

“Yeah, I just—I thought better of you, is all.”

His words sliced into her, an echo of the Death Eater’s curse.

“Well,” she said bitterly. “I’m happy to correct your misapprehensions.”

“Great. That’s just—you do that. Thanks for your help with the map.”

“My pleasure.”

He took a step, paused, and then continued stomping away. “I’ve got to go feed my cat.”

Lily snatched her book off the table and held it in front of her face, but the words blurred in front of her, and she threw it down on the space next to her.

He hadn’t been the one shackled to a table when some random stranger had cut him open, while he sat there powerless to stop it because he didn’t know magic. He wasn’t the one who had blindly wandered around Oporto, completely unaware that he’d be caught no matter what because he hadn’t even realized spells could go through water.

As much as she’d been heartbroken over not going to Hogwarts, and as much as she’d wished in the intervening years that she could still go…. Her opportunity was gone. She’d missed the chance to properly learn magic while there was still a school to teach her.

She couldn’t join this battle. She was so thoroughly ill-equipped to fight in it, regardless of what James thought. When confronted with a menacing witch, she’d been injured and disabled within seconds, and if it hadn’t been for James….

She wanted What’s His Face gone, yes, but there was little she could do.

She wasn’t a pirate. She wasn’t a soldier.

She was just…Lily.

\--

In the morning she ignored James when he walked past her on the main deck. Sleep had blunted her anger, but it still lay low, a dying ember that flared up when she saw him.

If he was ignoring her, she couldn’t tell, since she was too busy looking the other direction on her way to the library.

She slid into a seat next to Peter and noticed a new stack of books on the far corner of the table.

“Where did those come from?” she asked.

“James brought them in this morning.”

“Oh.”

James wouldn’t be so petty as to withhold information that might help them find the island, and Lily wouldn’t be so petty as to refuse to look through them. There were only four books, all worn around the edges, but they were something.

“He seemed a bit…upset,” Peter said. “D’you know what happened?”

Lily reached over and pulled the books toward her. “No.”

“Probably something with the Order.”

“Yeah.” She put on a tight smile. “Probably.”

“Oh, sorry. You probably want to get working.”

“No, sorry, I’m just worried we’re not going to crack it in time,” she said, which was only mostly a lie. “I don’t mean to be rude.”

“You’re not rude. Not right now, anyway. Sometimes to Sirius.”

“Only when he deserves it.”

“Well, yeah.”

He smiled, and Lily smiled back at him, this time genuinely.

He was all right, really. Perhaps not the sort of bloke she’d immediately peg as working for a resistance movement—not like Sirius, who exuded rebellion with every breath—but he was helping with the map as best he could.

“D’you like doing what you do?” she asked. “Working against What’s His Face.”

His smile faded. “It’s not…. It’s not about liking. I just do it,” he said. “It’s hard, and it’s terrifying. It’s…only it’s the only choice. You know?”

“Yeah,” Lily said, feeling a bit hollow.

“My sisters are a lot younger, but one’s a witch, and I’ve got to—they can’t do anything yet. If You Know Who found out about our father, and he sent someone after them…they’d be helpless. I had Sirius set up some wards and things at home, but nothing’s foolproof.”

She gave him a soft smile. “How old are they?”

“Five and seven.”

“It’s nice that they’re close together.”

“Yeah, they can keep each other company pretty well when they’re not trying to strangle each other.”

She laughed. “Speaking as someone with a sister close to my age, I completely understand. But really, it’s noble of you to come fight for them.”

“Oh, trust me,” he said. “It’s for me, too.”

Lily swallowed and picked up the top book. “Suppose we’d better get to it, then, eh?”

Peter sighed. “I suppose.”

She started skimming through the book, searching for any of the other Latin phrases. An hour passed, and then another, and then another.

Peter left for lunch, but Lily stayed put. They only had a couple days left until they reached the Azores, and it was all right for Peter to go—he had to go on watch after lunch—but Lily only had two more books left.

But after five minutes alone, she’d read the same sentence five times without comprehending it, and resigned herself to a short break. Still, a break didn’t have to be entirely useless. She set the text aside and pulled out the Death Eater’s wand. She’d tried to get used to the feel of it in her pocket, but it kept falling out. There were probably spells to keep it in that everyone else knew.

She aimed at a book on a shelf across the room. “ _Accio_.”

Nothing happened.

She thought that was what Sirius had said, but her pronunciation could have been off, or her power, or her wand movement.

“ _Accio,_ ” she said, this time more firmly.

The book twitched in place, sliding out toward her just a hair, and Lily smiled.

The door to the main deck swung open, flooding the room with light. Sirius came through and eyed Lily curiously, a plateful of food in his hand.

“Show me your form,” he said.

“Sorry?”

“You were trying to Summon something.”

“Oh. Er.”

He waved for her to get on with it, and she cast again, trying to copy the intonation Sirius had used on the violin case.

The book still didn’t come off the shelf, and she looked to Sirius doubtfully. He walked over to her and gripped her wrist, adjusting it slightly downwards.

“There, try it now,” he said.

This time the book actually fell off the shelf, landing with a thud. Lily grinned at him, but he shook his head.

“No, more power. You want that book, don’t you? Then bloody _bring_ it to you. It doesn’t want to come. You’ve got to _make_ it.”

She tried again, aiming at the book on the floor, and _pushed_ her magic through the wand.

The book hurtled through the air toward her, and she’d pulled too much, it was going to go right over her—but Sirius snatched it out of the air with one hand and offered it to her.

“Better. Here.” He set the plate down in front of her. “You missed lunch.”

“Er, thanks.”

He slid into a seat. “You working on the names?”

“Not at the moment.” Lily pocketed her wand and handed him one of the books from James.

“As much as I love reading, and I do, I’m open to thoughts on why exactly I’m reading this.”

“Look for some of the other translated Latin phrases, will you? Maybe there are more clues to other plays that we just haven’t picked up on yet.”

“I’m on it.” He leaned back in his chair, feet propped on the table, and began to page through the book. “Oh, and Dorcas asked me to change the wards on the magazine so you can practice your spells on the prisoner.”

Lily’s stomach twisted. “Oh.”

“I’ll adjust them tonight so you can get in, but, you know, since Remus isn’t in here to say it, be careful or whatever.”

“Your concern is overwhelming.”

He smirked at his book and made a show of turning a page.

The day moved on around them, and eventually the sun began streaming through the windows facing the main deck, pounding onto Lily’s back. She rubbed her palms over her eyes and sighed. She’d left the two remaining books to Sirius and gone back to trying to find references to tyrants or gods in the other locations, but her limited Spanish and fluent French were incapable of deciphering the Portuguese labels.

It didn’t help that her mind kept wandering. Practicing _Stupefy_ on a real person would be good practice, of course, but the Death Eater wasn’t exactly a volunteer. But Lily needed to be able to defend herself, and this person had already hurt her—had been willing to kill her, in fact. And if Lily didn’t learn how to knock people out, she’d have to resort to her cutlass or dagger, which were more harmful than Stunning—

The chair legs under Sirius thudded as he sat upright.

“We’ve been going about this all wrong,” Sirius said. “What if there’s more to the _tyrant of the gods_?”

Lily set down her quill. “How do you mean?”

“I mean, that clue could do more than confirm _Prometheus Bound_ is the key. Look.” Sirius slid a book of Sophocles’s plays over to Lily. “The formatting.”

Her eyes scanned over the page. The book of Aristophanic plays she’d read had been formatted like a script for a play, with paragraphs of dialogue for each character. This book, though, formatted the plays like poems, with frequent line breaks, some of them occurring midsentence. Next to each line the publisher had included a small number.

They needed something to go with a starting point. The map hadn’t yielded any textual clues yet.

But numbers.

Numbers could be direction or distance related.

Lily looked up to share a grin with Sirius. “Any idea what line number ‘tyrant of the gods’ is on?”

“No,” he said, standing up, “but it should be easy enough to find out.”


	15. Down the Ladder

Sirius dropped into his chair. “Two hundred and twenty-five.”

Lily looked at him sweetly. “How many times you’ve stared off dramatically into the distance this week?”

“Line number, of course. Please, don’t allow my dashing looks to distract you.”

“I’d never dare. I wouldn’t want my throat cut—or,” she said, mouth slipping into a mischievous smile, “she doesn’t go for the throat, does she?”

He arched an eyebrow at her. “Such enormous assumptions you’re making there.”

She raised an eyebrow back at him. “Did you want to deny it?”

“So,” he said, picking up the map, “two hundred and twenty-five. No idea what to do with that.”

“Two hundred and twenty-five.” Lily tapped her fingers on the table. “Two hundred and twenty-five.”

“Or two-two-five.”

“Could be. Two inches over, two inches down…five something.”

“Letters? B-B-E, unless I’m mistaken…. Or it’s B-Y, or….”

“V-E.” She looked down at her location list. “Nothing jumps out at me.”

He heaved a sigh. “Of course not.”

“Right. Well, keep looking through Sophocles for phrase references anyway, would you? I’ll see if I can find two-two-five or B-B-E or something in the locations.”

But even when Peter worked with them after his shift on watch, they couldn’t think of any sensible way to use the line number. Sirius didn’t find references in the books to the other clues, and they eventually gave up for the evening.

They sat through a morose dinner together. It had been nearly two weeks since land, and the aftereffects of their night of fun had already worn off. There was only so long humans could stand to be cooped up on a ship.

Or cats, as it turned out.

Algernon kept hopping up on laps during the meal, demanding to be petted. Peter fed him some scrap bits of dinner, but Algernon promptly went into the corner and sicked them back up.

Lily sympathized with Algernon. Not because of the food—Caradoc was withdrawn, even for Caradoc, but it hadn’t affected his cooking skills—but because the closer they drew to the end of the meal, the more her stomach seemed to toss and turn. It didn’t help that the weather had turned slightly sour, with high waves rocking the ship back and forth.

While Caradoc cleared dishes, Dorcas summoned Lily down to the magazine, plowing ahead without a second thought. The waves were less noticeable below deck, but Lily still had to pause at one point halfway across the deck to catch her balance.

Dorcas’s feet, on the other hand, carried her with perfect grace to the magazine. She muttered a spell at the door and heaved it open.

James had left one candle burning on the wall inside, casting the room in long shadows. Toward the back corner, the Death Eater sat on a steel chair fused to the ground, thick chains attaching her wrists to the back frame, her ankles manacled to the legs.

A murderer. Or so Lily had been told. It seemed unlikely, really, that this woman so thoroughly restrained to a chair had murdered Muggles for the fun of it.

She was surprisingly pretty, with soft features and gray eyes that narrowed as she watched them approach.

Dorcas folded her arms. “We’re practicing spellwork on you. Nothing harmful.”

“Oh, joy,” said the Death Eater. “Unless you’ve got more Veritaserum, I’m not telling you anything.”

“No,” Lily said. “Really. I’m not here to do anything but, er, Stun you.”

“Repeatedly,” Dorcas added.

The Death Eater looked at Lily skeptically. “Of course you are.”

“I’m told it’s harmless,” Lily said uncertainly.

“You’re what, eighteen? Twenty? And claiming you’re here to practice a fourth-year spell? At least _try_ to come up with a good lie.”

Dorcas rolled her eyes. “Ignore her, Lily. Cast away.”

Lily pulled the wand out of her pocket and shifted into the position Remus had taught her.

“Oh, but you’ve ended up with my wand.” The Death Eater’s bright eyes flashed, her mouth cocked in a smirk. “Must’ve lost yours then. Hopeless as a witch, I bet. Unless…. You’re a dirty little Mudblood, aren’t you? Weak and pathetic—”

Hot anger flashed through Lily, and her arm snapped into position. “ _Stupefy._ ”

Red light shot out from her wand, but the boat rocked, and Lily’s arm wavered as she shifted her weight to her other foot. The spell landed squarely on the woman’s shoulder, and the Death Eater jerked, her eyelids fluttering.

The anger bled out of Lily, quickly replaced by gnawing guilt as the woman recovered.

“You’re not...not actually _learning_ that, are you?” The woman shook her head a little. “Oh, dear, it looks like maybe you’re not a liar, you’re just incompetent.”

“Shut it.” Lily’s hand tightened around the wand.

“Make me.”

Dorcas nodded for Lily to try again. “More power.”

Lily pressed her lips together. “ _Stupefy_!”

The spell landed closer to the woman’s chest this time, near her clavicle, and her head lolled forward, wisps of hair hanging down from her face. She could have been dead, if it weren’t for the gentle rise and fall of her chest; if Lily had spoken different words, if Lily had had worse intentions.

It would be as easy as this, if she wanted to kill someone.

“Better,” Dorcas said.

Lily swallowed hard, her wand hand dropping a little. “Dorcas, I’m not….”

“You’re getting there.”

The woman’s head stirred once, and she slowly lifted her head to look up at Lily, raising her eyebrows. “Yes, better. Almost convinced me you had any idea what you were doing. This is why we have to get rid of all of you weaklings polluting the bloodlines. D’you even know what wandlore _is_? My wand’ll never work for someone like _you_ —”

“Again,” Dorcas said.

But Lily shook her head, letting her wand hand fall to her side. “No. I’m done.”

Dorcas stared at her. “You haven’t even fully Stunned her yet.”

“I don’t care,” Lily said briskly. “I’ll practice on someone else. Maybe Caradoc will help me during his free shift, or something.” She spun around and marched out of the magazine.

“Coward,” the Death Eater called before the door clanged shut.

Lily sank to the floor outside, wrapping her arms around her knees and squeezing her eyes shut.

The thought of ever being stuck frozen like she had that night—the thought of falling prey to something even worse…. She’d had many dreams in the past two weeks, some of them featuring James, but even more in which she sat crouched on the ground, hand outstretched. The woman or Severus or an unknown figure advanced on her, wand in hand, and shouted out spell after spell at her, while her screams lay trapped in her throat.

And even though the woman had taunted Lily, she must have been afraid, must have—and had, in fact—suspected that they’d come to torture her.

Or worse.

She probably had no idea she’d nearly been voted dead.

But even if it wasn’t torture—even if it wasn’t intended to hurt the woman—Lily couldn’t cast anything on her again.

Dorcas joined Lily after a minute and held out a hand. Lily didn’t hesitate in grasping it.

“Sorry,” Lily said, letting Dorcas help pull her up.

Dorcas looked at her strangely. “You should’ve said something earlier. But let’s go practice upstairs – maybe you can hit Sirius when he’s not watching. I’ll authorize that as boatswain and as your instructor.”

Lily smiled weakly. “Sounds good to me.”

\--

In her dreams that night, Lily relived the minor hex war she and Dorcas had held with Sirius on the main deck, grinning madly when Dorcas managed to Petrify his wand arm, and then they were in the magazine, still smiling, and Dorcas was telling her to cast again, and she could be trusted, so Lily cast _Stupefy._ Her spell came out properly and landed surely on the woman’s chest, and the woman hung limp in her bindings, head lolled forward again, and Lily turned to Dorcas for praise, but Dorcas was frowning, and saying that Lily had killed her. Lily’s hand found the woman’s pulse, or where it should have been, but there was nothing, only quickly cooling skin, and Lily’s mouth dropped open, protesting she hadn’t _meant_ to, and then Dorcas and Sirius were hauling her up a staircase to the main deck and shoving her onto the plank, and then James was there, shaking his head and pushing her off, and she fell through the warm summer wind, the ocean ready to swallow her up once and for all—

Footsteps thudded against the floor.

Someone was running, coming closer—

Lily bolted up in bed, eyes straining to see in the darkness. She reached for her cutlass, but it was back in James’s cabin after Marlene’s lesson, and she was going to die this time, she couldn’t defend herself—the wand. Her wand.

She grabbed it from her bedside, arm poised as she’d been taught, but the person ran right past her and scrambled down to the orlop deck.

Lily threw off her blanket and rushed over to the ladder. Everyone else used Deafening Charms while sleeping, but Lily hadn’t learned them yet, and after the attack in the library, she had no desire to, either.

The candlelight from the orlop deck streamed up through the ladder opening. Lily couldn’t see anyone and started to descend, wand tucked in her pocket.

“MARLENE MCKINNON!”

Unmistakably Dorcas’s shouting.

Lily dropped to the floor and saw the door to the magazine hanging open across the deck. Dorcas stood at the threshold, wand raised, and then disappeared into the room.

Lily ran.

She skidded to a halt across the room, catching herself on the still-open door, which shifted with her weight. She leaned in to see Marlene pointing her wand sideways at Dorcas, and holding the sword at the tied up Death Eater’s throat. How foolish Lily had been not to ensure Marlene returned it to James after their lesson.

Lily paused for the few seconds it took for the ship to right itself after another wave before moving forward again.

“Don’t be an idiot,” Dorcas said, her wand raised to point back at Marlene.

Marlene barely twitched when Lily stood next to Dorcas, only nudging the cutlass closer to the Death Eater. The awful façade of cheer had finally vanished, replaced now by lips pressed together, darting eyes, and shallow, frantic breathing.

For her part, the Death Eater remained silent, her face tight and expressionless, attention flipping between Dorcas and Lily and the sword at her throat.

A piece of parchment stuck out from Marlene’s back pocket, covered in messy handwriting, and Lily’s stomach dropped.

They should have expected something today, they should’ve _thought_ —

But they hadn’t, and all Lily could do was try to smooth things over.

“I’m _not_ being an idiot,” Marlene said. “James won’t do it. But I can do it. I have to do it.”

“You don’t like killing,” Dorcas pointed out.

“No. Of course I don’t.”

“So don’t do it.”

“I _have_ to.”

“You really don’t,” Lily said. Her hand slid down to her pocket, and she could feel the solid wood beneath the rough fabric of her trousers. The Death Eater’s wand, now Lily’s. Life could be that fickle.

Marlene’s wand aimed at the space between Lily and Dorcas, and Lily stilled her hand. True, Marlene couldn’t curse both of them at once, but they couldn’t Stun Marlene or pull her away without risking the blade slicing into the Death Eater’s throat. And if she were injured, Marlene wouldn’t Heal her, and Lily had no idea whether anyone else could or would do it for her.

“But she almost _killed_ you, Lily,” Marlene said.

“I know,” Lily said. “But I don’t want you to kill her.”

“She’s going to hurt us.”

“She’s tied up,” Dorcas reminded her. “I checked the bindings myself.”

“But she could escape. She was smart enough to find us and get on board, and we know she wanted to kill us, and she _will_ , given half a chance.”

Lily watched as the Death Eater swallowed hard, her attention now riveted on Marlene’s hand.

“What would your parents think?” Lily tried. “They wouldn’t want you to kill someone—”

“Merlin,” Marlene said, her voice cracking a bit, “it doesn’t matter what they would think, does it? Because they can’t think anymore because they’re _gone_ , and she’s part of the reason why, and why should give her the chance to take someone else’s family away—”

“You think I’ll give her that chance?” Dorcas said. “You think I’ll let her?”

Marlene’s eyes flicked quickly between the Death Eater and Dorcas, her lips dipping into a faint frown.

She wasn’t beyond reason. That was good, in a way. Except it meant she could do it.

But she hadn’t done it yet.

She’d had the chance but she hadn’t taken it. And she couldn’t really think that Dorcas and Lily would let her do it.

She wanted to be persuaded out of it.

But then again, Dorcas did not seem so convinced, standing tense, poised to leap forward if Marlene acted. Their arms had to be growing tired now from remaining aloft for so long, but neither seemed likely to give in.

Unlike Dorcas, Lily had known Marlene for less than a month. She had a sense of Marlene’s character, but it was impossible to know someone well in such a short time.

It was impossible to know whether Marlene truly meant it.

If Dorcas took this as a serious threat….

“Here’s what’s going to happen,” Dorcas said. “You’re going to leave her alone. We’ll take her back to England and interrogate her more. After that….”

“ _No_.” Marlene twitched the sword, and the Death Eater flinched. “There’s too much that could go wrong, and I can’t—I can’t let her take any of you, I _can’t—_ “

Even if they knocked Marlene out, they’d still have to keep watch on her for the rest of the trip, keep her from trying again.

She had to see sense.

“You didn’t sleep for three days after you accidentally killed Yaxley,” Dorcas said.

Marlene shook her head in small, sharp movements. “This is different, all right? I’m older now, and this won’t be an accident, and she—”

“It won’t be different. I promise you that.”

Lily glimpsed sideways. Dorcas, ever stern-faced, had let her expression soften, if only a little.

“I can’t lose any of you,” Marlene said. “I _can’t_ —”

The room tilted as another wave slammed into the side of the ship. Lily threw out her arms to shift her weight forward, and Marlene’s foot slid forward, her hand holding the sword dropping a bit to catch her balance—

The Death Eater breathed in sharply and jerked her head backwards—

Lily leaped forward and grabbed Marlene’s arm, pulling the sword away from the woman’s throat.

The room swung back into a gentle rocking, and Marlene stared at where the sword had nicked the Death Eater’s skin. Lily hadn’t let go of her arm, and the sword hung between them.

And then Lily had sole ownership of the cutlass.

It hung at her side, and it seemed like it should feel heavier, somehow, or thicker, or anything different now that it had drawn blood.

Marlene’s now-free hand flew to her mouth and her wand arm dropped to her side.

She stood petrified, and so did Lily, her earlier nimbleness long gone as she hung caught in the moment, the ship rocking normally beneath their feet, once, and then twice before Marlene returned to herself.

“Oh, Merlin,” Marlene said. “Oh, _Merlin_.”

The Death Eater swallowed loudly, her face horribly pale, blood trickling in a single rivulet down her throat, disappearing under her shirt collar—

“I’m so sorry,” Marlene told the woman. She lifted her wand, but her hand was shaking. “I can try—I’m not—”

“Just leave it,” the woman said. “Just go, all right?”                                                    

A hand tried to take the sword from Lily, and she nearly jumped, but it was only Dorcas. Lily let her have the cutlass.

She turned back to Marlene, who was still fixated on the Death Eater’s neck and swallowing compulsively, and closed the gap between them, wrapping her arms around Marlene’s trembling shoulders and holding on tight.

Marlene’s voice was barely audible. “I’m sorry.”

“I know,” Lily said, her nose in Marlene’s hair. “It’s okay.”

\--

Dorcas quickly patched up the wound, and Lily led them up to the common room. James approached them on the main deck with a questioning look on his face, but she discreetly shook her head, dropping the cutlass next to the door. He stopped in his tracks and nodded.

While Dorcas settled Marlene on the sofa, Lily poured the rum, and then squeezed in next to them, handing out glasses. Dorcas downed half of hers in one neat gulp. Lily took a small sip, watching Marlene hold her glass in her lap, fingers clutched around the sides, her head hanging.

“Marlene,” Lily said softly. “It’s all right. We care about you and we’re not angry. Just talk to us, all right? Please.”

Marlene rotated the glass in her hands, and Lily saw her shoulders tense up, and her eyes squeeze shut. Her hands tightened around the glass, enough that Lily grew concerned she might shatter it.

Marlene gave a small hiccup, and then another, small, delicate noises caught in the back of her throat. And then finally, finally, Marlene began to cry.

The tears came, and the pleas, and the anger, and Lily and Dorcas sat through it all. Dorcas didn’t say much, but she was _there_ , and didn’t even say one thing that could have been misconstrued as harsh. Lily hummed, and nodded, and asked questions, and just let Marlene say all the words she’d pent up over two long, miserable, lonely weeks.

How her family had certain funeral rites that she would miss, how her parents had fought constantly but always made up, how her brother had secretly liked to cook but had never told anyone but Marlene.

And while she spoke, a knot uncoiled in Lily. The worst had finally come: Marlene had nearly done something awful, but she hadn’t, in the end.

Eventually Marlene fell asleep curled up on the sofa while Lily stroked her unbraided hair. Lily looked up at Dorcas to find her face as inscrutable as ever, staring off into space.

Dorcas looked back at her and—well, she didn’t quite smile. Dorcas didn’t ever seem to fully smile. Her mouth just stretched at the sides, and she never grinned.

But she did smile a little now, grim but relieved.

Lily didn’t speak for fear of waking Marlene, but she smiled back at Dorcas, and sighed. With the threat of violence long gone, her body had begun reminding her that it was the middle of the night.

But she couldn’t leave Marlene and go back to bed. Not yet, anyway. Dorcas didn’t get up from her chair either, not until James stopped in and beckoned them toward the door.

“All right,” he said quietly, glancing at Marlene. “What happened?”

Dorcas folded her arms. “I told her to check the inventory.”

“And she probably did,” Lily said, “and then she went after the Death Eater with my sword.”

James sighed. “I should’ve known something was wrong when she didn’t return the cutlass after her lesson. That’s on me – I didn’t even realize until Remus came and found me when Dorcas ran below deck.”

Lily looked back at the sofa. “Marlene backed off, though. I think—I hope she wouldn’t have done it if Dorcas hadn’t chased her down.”

“Did you go to check up on her?” James asked Dorcas.

Dorcas shook her head. “Tracking Charm.”

“ _What_?” he said, and then lowered his voice. “When did you cast that?”

“Right after the vote.”

“ _Dorcas_.”

“Paid off, didn’t it?”

“What?” Lily said.

James fixed Dorcas with a stern look. “As Dorcas well knows, there’s no way of breaking a Tracking Charm once you’ve cast it until you touch the subject’s skin. It constantly pulls at you, bothering you to go break it. It’s exceptionally annoying.”

Lily frowned. “Isn’t that the spell you cast on me in Oporto?”

Dorcas’s eyebrows shot up.

He waved a hand. “I knew I could find you. Or that you’d take it off yourself – the target can end it if they know it’s there. Or they can run away and let the spell torment you forever. You see, Lily,” he said, throwing a patronizing glance at Dorcas, “as every advanced Charms student knows, letting the spell go on for too long has historically caused madness in the caster.”

Dorcas shrugged. “It worked.”

“ _Don’t_ do it again. I need you sane and healthy for this mission, all right?”

She studied the ceiling and quirked her mouth to the side.

“ _Meadowes_.”

“I won’t let it run so long next time.”

“Not quite,” James sighed. “But good enough. Sirius will be up in a bit – tell him to put the wards back the way they were. Dorcas, I’ll leave you to whatever, and Lily, go back to sleep, yeah? We need you well rested.”

“I’ll be with Marlene in here.”

“So long as you sleep.” One hand absently threaded through his hair. “Good night. Or good morning. Whichever you feel like pretending it is. I’ll leave you to ponder these serious issues and see you later either way.”

Dorcas followed him out onto the deck, and Lily turned back toward Marlene.

The others probably knew how to turn a chair into a sofa, but that hadn’t been covered in Remus’s defense-based curriculum quite yet. She curled up in one of the maroon chairs, resting her head on the armrest. It was terribly uncomfortable, but she fell asleep almost instantly, a slight smile on her face.

\--

Marlene was gone when Lily awoke to the sounds of clattering plates.

“I’m so sorry,” Caradoc said. “I tried to be quiet.”

“Just as well,” Lily said through a yawn. “I’ve got things to do today.” She stood up and stretched out her back. It twinged in a few spots, but she’d slept in worse places.

She sat down at the table while the plates whirled around her, utensils settling into place. He’d already brought up the kettle, and she poured herself a much-needed cup of tea.

Caradoc sent the milk and sugar her way with a flick of his wand. “Marlene’s out on duty, but she looks well, all things considered.”

“I take it you heard about our adventure last night.”

“Sirius told me. Or at least, he told me what he’d heard.”

“It’s not that complicated. But after, she—” Lily paused. “I think she’s turned a corner.”

Caradoc favored her with one of his gentle smiles. “That’s really, really good to hear.”

The door swung open and Sirius strolled in, Algernon close behind. “What’s for breakfast, then?”

“Bacon sandwiches.” Caradoc finished setting the table and headed for the door. “Back in a moment.”

Sirius sat down next to Lily, while Algernon wound around her legs. She reached down to let him run his cheek against her hand.

“Morning to both of you,” she said.

“Not a good one, so thanks for omitting that.”

“I don’t think what happened last night means we can’t have a good morning.”

“Hm?” Sirius said. “Nah, I meant, tomorrow’s the day.”

Whatever knot had disappeared from her stomach the night before suddenly rethreaded itself. “Oh.”

The door opened again, this time for Marlene and Dorcas, speaking in low voices.

Marlene was smiling. For real, finally.

Just a little. Just barely. But it was undeniably there.

And maybe Lily would be less alert today while working on the map, but she wouldn’t have changed her decision to get up last night, not at the cost of Marlene nearly smiling.

The door had barely swung shut when it opened for Peter, and then Caradoc, and then the food. Marlene took a seat between Dorcas and Lily, and Lily poured her a cup of tea.

Peter said something nice to Marlene, and Sirius teased him, and Dorcas mock glared at Sirius. Lily slipped Algernon a piece of bacon and Caradoc watched all of them, wearing an indulgent smile.

Things weren’t the same as they’d been, but that was life; things never went back to how they were after a loss like that. There was only the chance to adjust routines, and expectations, and dreams. There was only the hope that life would become more tolerable than it was in the immediate aftermath, the first stunning ray of sunlight through towering storm clouds.

Lily’s life had become something like pleasant in the months leading up to her time on James’s ship. She’d made it through her storm in one piece.

Marlene had her own issues to deal with now, and the others—they had all sorts of storm fronts to face, and it seemed the clouds for them never quite left, never quite thinned, the sky already fallen. But somehow they kept pressing on anyway, against greater odds and greater enemies than Lily had ever faced.

There was something beautiful in that perseverance.

All Lily had to do was ask and she could be part of it. Like Marlene, she had very little to lose.

Except she glanced around the table at the others, and reached down to scratch Algernon’s ears, and that wasn’t—that wasn’t quite true, anymore.

She hadn’t meant for that to happen. They’d probably intended it even less.

She looked down at her tea.

There would be time to consider that later. For now, she thought, taking a bite of bread, she had to solve that bloody map.

\--

Lily picked up her notes from the day before and frowned. Marlene could probably use her company, but the map was the absolute priority at the moment.

The line number seemed to be worthless. Sirius hadn’t found any more references to the Latin phrases in the other plays, and she hadn’t been able to puzzle together another meaningful location on the map. They had so many potential clues, and yet none of them had come together into something useful.

Lily braided and unbraided her hair ten times before lunch. Sirius’s foot beat out a rapid pattern against the wooden floor, and Peter’s lip looked like it was on the verge of being bitten straight through. Between the three of them they fidgeted enough to scare away Algernon, who shot them an annoyed look on his way out onto the main deck.

There had to be something they were missing. A starting point wasn’t much help without somewhere to go. Assuming, of course, that their conclusions about the starting point were correct.

But there were no more leads to follow, and no ideas suddenly sprang to Lily’s mind, and it wasn’t fair – they seemed so _close_ , but they still seemed to have so little to go on.

The day flew by in a haze of frustration, and soon the sun warmed them as it settled into the west, a reminder that the day was drawing to a close.

“All right,” Lily said, shortly before dinner. “Any last minute, mad suggestions?”

Sirius looked up from his notes, brushing a lock hair out of his face. “You’d think we’d have _something_ by now, but Bode clearly meant for no one to ever find the prophecies again.”

“Peter?” Lily tried.

He scratched his head. “I really don’t know.”

“So we…what, take port in Angra de Heroismo if we can’t find anything?”

Sirius shrugged. “Not much else to do. We could try sailing a few directions away from there, if nothing else. See if we can’t stumble across something.”

“That seems so…inelegant.”

Peter paused in sketching out a circle on his parchment. “I mean, I’ve got…. Nevermind.”

Sirius gave a sharp nod. “Out with it, Wormtail.”

“It’s just…. It’s stupid.”

“Peter,” Lily said, “any idea is better than nothing. And if Sirius laughs, I’ll hex him.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “You don’t even know any hexes.”

“No, but I’ll have Dorcas teach me and then catch you when you come down from watch tomorrow.”

“Amateur. Never tell someone when you’re planning to attack.”

She arched an eyebrow back at him. “Unless it’s a ruse, of course.”

“Touché.”

“Now, Peter, what’s your idea?”

“It’s just….I haven’t done maths in a long time, but….” He looked at them warily, and then drew a cross through the middle of the circle. “Well, a circle has three hundred and sixty degrees, and I just thought…two hundred twenty-five is less than that. So, you know, it could be an angle.”

“Peter,” Lily breathed. She glanced up at Sirius, who was watching Peter with keen eyes.

Peter pointed his quill in the lower left quadrant of the circle he’d drawn. “It’d be somewhere here.”

Sirius grabbed two pieces of parchment and overlaid them on the map in a right angle, so that the dot for Angra de Heroismo was just visible in the intersecting corner of the parchments. He snatched Peter’s quill out of his hand and laid it down, the bulk of the feather on top of the parchment, leaving just the nib to stick out over the visible quadrant of the map.

“Two hundred twenty five would be halfway through this quadrant. Assuming east is zero, of course.” He flashed a smile up at Peter and adjusted the quill nib to rest halfway between the parchments, at about two hundred twenty-five degrees from east.

At first he frowned at it – nothing seemed to look any different, the nib pointing at nothing in particular. But then Sirius’s frown turned curious, and he began pushing the quill nib toward the southwest corner of the map, and then he stopped.

A star lay beneath the tip of the quill.

Sirius slowly looked up at Peter and Lily in turn, a smile spreading across his face. “Well, Wormtail, it seems you were paying more attention in class than I thought, you brilliant bastard.”

“You think it might be that star?”

“No way to know unless we go, but this gives us a direction, and a starting point, and that star—that’s too close to coincidence.” He stood up, grabbing the map with one hand and ruffling Peter’s hair with the other. “I’ll chart us a course.”

Lily pushed back in her seat. “Finally, you come in handy.”

“That, and I keep the women happy.”

“Is that an admission?”

“I was referring to my looks, and my looks only, thank you.”

“Naturally.”

The three of them headed out onto the deck, Sirius leading the way. It wasn’t certain that this was, in fact, the solution to the map. They wouldn’t know until tomorrow. But at least it _felt_ like a victory.

The sun hung low and orange on the horizon, barely visible over the forecastle. Sirius took the steps up to the quarterdeck two at a time and grinned at James, who stood at the helm.

“Got it, Prongs.”

James beamed back at them. “Finally! Knew you lot could do it.”

“Peter got it in the end,” Lily said as she reached the top of the stairs, Peter at her side. She nudged him with her elbow, and he blushed. “It’s an angle, and there’s a star—well, we think we’ve got it, anyway.”

“Knew Peter’d come through,” Sirius said.

James and Lily shared a look, and Peter studied his feet.

“Oi.” Sirius waved the map at James. “None of that, thanks.”

“Do you have any idea what he’s talking about, Lily?”

“Not in the slightest, James.”

James smiled, and this time it was just for Lily. “I’ve good news, too, as it happens – I just heard a seagull.”

“And Moony didn’t trust me to navigate properly,” Sirius said. “More fool him.”

“Except that one time you took us off course.”

“ _Once_. And I fixed it, didn’t I?”

“Only after Remus pointed it out,” Peter said.

Sirius mimed someone stabbing him in the heart.

James sighed. “Go chart a course to somewhere we can take port overnight.”

Sirius grinned. “Aye aye, Captain.” He and Peter disappeared into the navigation room, and took with them the buffer between Lily and James.

“Well.” Lily flicked her braid over her shoulder and shifted her weight. “I suppose I had better….” Except she no longer had an excuse in the map. “Go check on Marlene.” Except Marlene was asleep, and he knew it, but hopefully he wouldn’t point that out.

“Yeah.” James adjusted his glasses. “Er, thanks, by the way. For being there for her.”

“She’s my friend. Of course I’d—I mean, we haven’t known each other very long, and we won’t see each other at all soon…but she’s still a friend.”

“Lily, what I said, about coming back to England—”

“I’ve just helped solve an impossible treasure map. Please don’t ruin my good mood.”

His mouth twitched up at one end. “I’ll just—I’ll just say you’re welcome to join my crew. If you don’t want to go help on land, I mean.”

She looked at the ground. “I’ll think about it.”

“I mean, obviously you’re brave, running away from home to go sail around the world—”

“Oh, I’ve barely left Europe—”

“All the same. So I know you could help once we train you up a bit. You’ve already helped so much.”

She offered him a weak smile, but didn’t say anything more.

“This is it, then.” He leaned against the helm. “The beginning of the end.”

“No need to make it sound so dramatic.”

“I’m not playing pirate anymore – I’ve got to have fun somehow, don’t I?”

“Where’d your hat go?”

“Algernon sicked up in it. It’s drying out after a thorough cleaning.”

“Oh. Dear.”

“I had it coming.”

She bit back a laugh, ducking her chin. He smiled when he noticed, but cut it short when the door next to them opened.

Sirius strolled out of the navigation room with hands in his pockets, and Peter close behind him. “We marked off a spot that looks safe enough.”

“Thanks,” James said. “I’ll take a look and adjust the sails.”

“We’re going to go celebrate with a drink. Or two. Or five. You coming, Lily?”

As tempting as a drink sounded, there was one place she wanted to be right then, and it wasn’t with Sirius and Peter.

“I want to take a look at the map,” she said. “I like knowing where we’re going, now that I’m allowed to know.”

“Suit yourself,” he said, and sauntered down to the main deck, playfully knocking his shoulder into Peter’s as they walked.

When he’d gone, James raised his eyebrows at Lily. “Want to know where we’re going, eh?”

She lifted her chin and went to open the door. “Are you coming, or not?”

He stepped into the navigation room wearing a smug smile and went to examine Sirius’s work. “Looks good enough.”

She leaned over his shoulder to see the small circle Sirius had drawn near the western coast of Terceira, and another one over where they believed the Island of Prophecies lay.

Lily had known about magic for more than half her life, but prophecies—real, true prophecies—still seemed like a fairytale. The Order had sent seven valuable members on a long journey, and What’s His Face had sent one of his followers all the way to Portugal, and probably even more to the Azores, all just to get to this island first.

“They’re bound to meet us there, aren’t they?” Lily said. “One way or another.”

“I hate to think it—I hate to think what that means—but yeah, probably. I’d say let’s all celebrate and get drunk tonight, but considering what I think we’ll be up against tomorrow….”

“I think we’ll get through it, though. We can beat them.”

“We? Lily, I said you should come back with us, not…er.”

“Don’t tell me you’re you trying to prevent me from going onto the island with you. After you got all shirty with me over—you know.”

He clasped the back of his neck. “Lily, someday you’re going to be an amazing duelist, and I hope you come back to England with us. But you don’t know how to defend yourself yet, and to let you walk into an environment where we both agree there’ll probably be Death Eaters….”

“So I get to stay behind while you lot go onto an island that _I_ helped find.”

He turned to face her, hands dropping to his sides. “This is—this is me being pragmatic. My job is to assess the team’s abilities as they stand right now, and I know yours, and they’re…. Well, I think you’ll agree they’re pretty limited.”

“I see.”

If he’d asked her yesterday if she’d wanted to go on the island with them, she might’ve said no. She might’ve agreed with him that she would be more of a liability than an asset.

“I trust you,” he said. “I really do. But you can’t come with us on that island. I can’t let you risk your life like that.”

“I didn’t know you cared,” she said coolly.

“You _know_ I care about you. You know I…well, maybe you don’t. But, Lily, I can’t—I can’t stand the thought of coming off that island without you.”

She glanced away, her heart a deafening thud in her chest. “I thought I was some silly captive.”

“Fishing for compliments?”

“Fishing for a whole lot more than that,” she said, even though it felt like tearing into an old wound. She’d never learn, apparently. “We might die tomorrow, after all.”

“ _I_ might die. You shouldn’t be at risk.”

“So you say, but look what happened the last time you left me alone and locked up.”

“I wasn’t going to lock you up.”

If Death Eaters were planning to show up, and that did seem likely, she wouldn’t be able to fight them. It rankled, but that didn’t make it any less true. She hadn’t even been able to Stun the Death Eater they had. That was the closest she’d got to a magical fight, and she’d failed.

“I suppose someone’s got to defend the ship,” she said lightly.

He quirked his lips, a small half-smile appearing and disappearing in an instant, like an eddy in a river. “You’re amazing, you know.”

“I suppose I’ll take compliments, lacking everything else, but don’t think compliments will convince me to be happy about it.”

“Not persuasion,” he said. “I just—I needed to say it. In case. You know.”

“Oh.” She brushed a wisp of hair out of her eyes. “Well. Thank you.”

He folded his arms, looking to the side, and then uncrossed them again, hands half-clenched into fists.

“Before you decide you hate me for that,” he said, eyes not quite meeting hers, “can I—can I kiss you?”

And with one simple question, the wound sealed up, as neatly as if Marlene had Healed it.

Fifty odd responses ran through Lily’s head, some silly, some romantic, some desperate. None as perfectly snappy yet seductive as she would have liked.

She tossed them all aside and kissed him.

One of her hands sneaked up to grasp the back of his head, drawing him in, while the other pressed flat against his chest over his racing heart.

It wasn’t like their first kiss – he’d been surprised, then, not quite an enthusiastic participant.

There was no question now of how he felt.

His hands settled in confidently around her waist. He kissed that way, too, assured and insistent, his tongue brushing along her lips.

Contentedness spiraled in her chest, wrapping warmly around her heart, and she curled her fingers over his shirt, beyond pleased to feel his pulse racing in tandem with hers—

He pulled back, hands sliding off her and moving to fold across his chest as he half-turned away, his cheeks flushed.

“Sorry,” he said.

“If you’re apologizing for anything but ending it,” Lily said, hands hanging uselessly without a weapon at her side, “I will learn how to castrate people and do it to you. I bet Dorcas knows how and is willing to teach me.”

“I’m sorry because that was a bad idea.”

“James, I’m a grown woman. I’m perfectly capable of making my own decisions about the people I search for treasure with.”

He smiled at that, briefly, but long enough for her to catch it. “I find it hard to believe anyone’s ever influenced you to do anything.”

“My father always called me headstrong. I told him that was unfair because boys never got called that.”

“No,” he said quietly. “I suppose they don’t.”

“Not even in the wizarding world?”

“Not even there.” He forced his arms down and to his sides. “Right. Well, I need—I need to get us on course.”

“James,” her traitorous mouth said, “if you want—”

“Lily. That’s it. I can’t…I can’t.”

“All right,” she said hollowly. “That’s…I’ll go. And do…something.”

He nodded, studying the ground, his hand running through his hair.

She took one last look at him, shoved down any and all thoughts of kissing him again, and left.


	16. Up the Ladder

A palette of red and orange decorated the horizon, the sun hidden behind the mountainous island of Terceira. After two weeks at sea, it would have been nice to see land by the full light of day, but they'd already set sail for the Island of Prophecies. As soon as she'd woken up, Lily had run up to her favorite spot on the forecastle deck, only to watch the shadow of land disappear into the distance.

After getting the ship going, most of the crew had disappeared to the gun deck to get in a last minute nap. Sirius loitered in the crow's nest while James manned the helm, periodically adjusting the sails. If Lily had been a braver person, she might've kept him company. But her cheeks still heated when she thought about how he'd kissed her, and then rejected her— _again._

There would be a better distraction soon enough if Sirius had done his calculations correctly, and if they'd read Bode's map as intended. She shivered in the cool morning breeze, and wrapped her arms around herself. If they'd got it wrong—well, if they'd got it wrong, they'd rethink. There was no point in wondering any longer whether they'd worked it out properly; they'd know for certain soon enough.

Being wrong would not be the end of the world, she told herself.

It didn't help.

She turned at the sound of someone climbing the staircase. Marlene trudged up, arms wrapped across her chest, her hair tucked into a simple braid.

"Couldn't sleep?" Lily asked as Marlene approached her.

"Too nervous. You?"

Lily nodded.

"Is it awful," Marlene said, "that I'm half hoping you were wrong and we don't have to deal with it yet?"

"No. Not at all."

"I reckon you'd like to be right, though, if only so you can get off the ship sooner."

Lily hummed noncommittally.

Even if they'd got it right, there would be another two weeks with the crew until Portugal.

Another two weeks with James.

Maybe she'd try and barter passage out of the Azores. Riding back with strangers would be less painful than the torment of having James so close but still out of reach, less agonizing than dealing with daily reminders of a world that she still wasn't really a part of.

Marlene toyed with the end of her braid. "Thanks, by the way. I didn't say it before, but thanks."

Lily smiled. "You're welcome."

"I was—that night, I wasn't thinking—"

"It's okay, Marlene. Really."

"Right. Good."

"I'm glad you're feeling better."

Marlene quirked her lips. "I still feel like shit. But at least I'm not—like I was. Thank Merlin."

"If you feel like you're slipping, come find me, all right? I'll have plenty of free time without the map."

"All right," Marlene said. "If you really want my company that badly."

"I really do. What, you think I want to spend the next two weeks watching Sirius trying to get his hair to fall just right?"

"Consider that my gift to you, then. More time with me, less with Sirius Black."

The promise of a brief breakfast eventually lured the rest of the crew up onto the main deck. No one spoke much, each too caught up in their own thoughts, and they emerged from the common room just in time to see another speck of land on the horizon.

Lily sprinted up to the forecastle deck again, beaming. When she'd convinced herself that it was real land and not an illusion, she let out a laugh of relief. Dorcas had followed Lily up the stairs, and she shared a grim smile with Lily before running off to help prepare for their arrival.

The sun had properly shown itself by the time the shape of the small island became clear, one short, verdant mountain rising up out of the sea. The wind had chased away the lingering morning clouds, leaving a brilliant blue sky overhead.

They pulled into a perfectly formed horseshoe bay with steep, jagged cliffs that came together to meet in a narrow strip of sandy beach.

The crew scrambled around, shouting instructions to each other and casting spells at the ship to keep it from moving any further into the bay. Lily was torn between watching the cacophony of spells behind her, the glorious sight of hard rock and grass around them, and the unfamiliar birds cawing overhead.

When the shouts of spells had dwindled, and the ship had stopped as near to the shore as they dared, she joined the others where they'd gathered around James on the main deck.

"Well, we made it," James said. Algernon stood at his feet, his head held high. "At least, we're pretty sure. But for now we're operating under the assumption that we didn't stumble across an island by pure accident, and that Lily and Sirius and Peter are bloody geniuses."

Sirius took a bow, and Remus accidentally-on-purpose bumped into him, so that Sirius stumbled. He stood back up and mock-glared at Remus.

"I know we've come a long way," James continued, "and that we're probably not all feeling our absolute best this morning. I know I've certainly felt better. But I ask that you use whatever strength you've got left for this one last push. Think of the journey home as our holiday, and all that stands between us and a more relaxing cruise is one lousy prophecy."

Dorcas smirked.

"Right." James gestured toward Caradoc. "Before we go ashore, Remus and Caradoc have developed a little something in their free time to help us with the mission. Gentlemen?"

Caradoc fished around and pulled something out of his pocket while Remus spoke.

"James requested that we work on a method of keeping in touch during the mission. We're going to be separated, potentially by quite a bit. Patronuses are best-suited for one-on-one, non-instantaneous communication, so we thought we should devise something more appropriate for this situation."

Caradoc walked around the circle and handed out something tiny and golden to each crew member. But when he got to Lily, he only offered a small smile, and moved on to Sirius at her side.

Disappointment was unwelcome and unnecessary, but it washed over her anyway.

Remus pulled back a short lock of hair, letting the sunlight catch on the gold stud decorating his earlobe. "Anything I say can be heard by anyone else wearing an earring, and everyone else can likewise hear me."

James inspected the earring and grinned. "I thought we were done playing pirates."

"I admit," Remus said, "the ruse was rather an inspiration."

"Fetch my hat, Algernon, would you?"

Algernon sent James a flat look, but darted off into the library all the same.

"Do we need to get our ears pierced?" Peter asked, looking a bit green.

Remus smiled. "It only stings for the brief moment until Marlene Heals you."

Peter nodded, biting his lip, while Caradoc held his wand up against Dorcas's earlobe. She barely twitched, and waved Marlene off when she took a step closer.

"See?" Remus said.

Dorcas cocked her head, listening, and slanted a smile at him. "Brilliant."

Sirius tossed his earring in the air and caught it one-handed. "Couldn't have invented this when we were at Hogwarts?"

"Yes," Remus mused, "how unfortunate we weren't able to use these for minor acts of theft and petty vandalism, and are instead reduced to utilizing them to help defeat You Know Who."

Lily folded her arms and watched everyone else experiment with their new jewelry. She'd sold off her last pair of earrings to get to Brest; and since James hadn't indicated that he'd changed his mind about her going ashore, apparently her ears would remain sadly unadorned for a while longer.

When Marlene had finished Healing Peter's ear—he kept rubbing it with one hand—James cleared his throat.

"If we're all connected," he said, "then there's not much more to say. I don't know what's ahead, but we'll get through it together—"

"Can we go yet?" Dorcas said.

James sighed, not seeming terribly annoyed. "Yes, Meadowes. To the rowboat."

He hung back while the others headed for the side of the ship, and beckoned Lily and Caradoc over.

"Under other circumstances," he said, "I'd love to take both of you with us. But we need someone to guard the ship, and Lily—well." He looked away, one hand rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm sorry. But it makes the most sense for you to stay. Your cutlass is in the library. You know, in case you get bored and need to practice."

Lily watched her feet as she shifted her weight. Then she forced herself to look up and offer a thin smile. "Good luck."

"And you," James said, turning to Caradoc, "Mister Dearborn."

Caradoc smiled. "Captain Potter."

"I'd have been lost without you this year. I can't—I can't thank you enough for all you've done."

"I've enjoyed serving under all the Potters."

"Keep an eye on my ship, will you?"

Caradoc saluted. "Aye aye, Captain."

James firmly shook Caradoc's hand, a strange sort of look on his face.

"Oi, Prongs!" Sirius called from the rowboat. "You can snog Caradoc when we get back."

James flipped him a rude gesture and offered one last smile to Lily and Caradoc. "See you soon," he said, and headed to join the others.

Once more Lily stood idly by while everyone else fulfilled some purpose. The others were off to find a prophecy, and Caradoc was guarding the ship, and Lily was just there, watching Caradoc lower the rowboat into the bay.

She'd said farewell to James—in a way, just in case—but the others…if something did happen….

She ran over to the edge to wave frantically at them as they dropped away from her. Marlene waved back, Dorcas rolled her eyes, and Sirius blew her a kiss. Lily laughed, and blew one back at him.

A door snicked open, and Lily whirled to face the sterncastle, hand reaching for her wand. But it was just Algernon, walking backwards and dragging James's pirate hat by the mouth.

"Oh, Algernon," Lily said, her voice nearly breaking. She hurried over, sank to her knees, and eased the hat out of his mouth. "They've already left."

Algernon stared up at her for half a moment before rushing to the edge of the ship, but the rowboat had already landed in the clear waters below them. He meowed loudly, and Lily thought she heard something like a shout up from James, the words indistinguishable.

She donned the pirate hat and scooped Algernon up into her arms. "He'll be back," she said quietly, and scratched his ears while she watched the rowboat glide toward the beach.

Caradoc came over to join her, listening intently. If he could hear everything they said…well, they weren't exactly a subdued group.

Lily studied the beach in the distance. The cliff was least steep there, surmountable, although not an easy walk.

Caradoc pulled out a small telescope from his pocket and held it up in front of one eye. "There's a ladder tall enough to get you to the grassier part above that bit of cliff at the bottom." He paused, listening. "I can't really see much beyond the ladder. There might be a path. It's hard to tell from here." His mouth curved up at one end.

"What are they saying?" Lily asked.

But he shook his head slightly, not wanting to repeat whatever he'd heard.

She held Algernon a bit closer. It was one thing to be left on the ship, but it was another to be left out of the conversation entirely. Of course, if they'd bought the earrings in Portugal, they wouldn't have thought they'd need an extra for her.

The boat slid onto the beach, hauled up by what looked like Dorcas and Sirius. Lily caught Caradoc making an amused face next to her as the crew paraded across the beach and over to the ladder, where they began filing up.

Caradoc wordlessly offered Lily his telescope, but she declined; Algernon sat tense in her arms, eyes fixed on the land ahead of them, and she wouldn't force him to bear this alone.

"There's a path," Caradoc murmured to Lily, and she nodded in thanks.

The crew followed the winding trail up the cliff, curving back and forth in a single file line. Based on height, James led the way, with Sirius at his back and Remus bringing up the rear.

"No." Caradoc readjusted his telescope. "I can't see where it goes at all."

Lily glanced behind them to check the horizon, but it remained clear. At least if the Death Eaters wanted to find the island, they'd have to duplicate Sirius's route. They couldn't sneak up from another side of the island, unless they'd got there first. And maybe they were hiding out on the other side of the island somewhere, but it didn't change what Lily could do about it, which was nothing.

The crew had reached the top of the hill. Someone flung an arm in the air and waved—it looked like Marlene—and Lily smiled. Caradoc waved back, and the crew disappeared over the hill one by one.

"There's a cave entrance," Caradoc said quietly, this time to Lily. "Just down the path."

"Promising," she said.

It made sense, of course. The Ministry wouldn't have left prophecies out in the element, especially if, like Lily suspected, they were stored on paper.

She looked backwards once again. Still clear. Algernon fidgeted when she turned, unwilling to look away for even a moment from where James had gone.

"He's going underground," she told him. "You're definitely not going to see him from here."

But Algernon growled, and she stood still.

"Wait," Caradoc said quickly. "I lost James."

Her head snapped to face him. "What?"

He wasn't talking to her, though. "Sirius, did James go into the cave?" He listened closely for a minute. "Yes, now I can hear you. Try—yes."

Lily's arms closed in tighter around Algernon, but he didn't seem to mind.

"You'll have to go on," Caradoc said. "I'm not going to be able to help anymore anyway."

She scowled, but said nothing.

"Good luck," he told them, smiling faintly. Then he turned to Lily. "The cave interferes with the earring spell. They can hear each other but not me, and I can't hear them."

"We're cut off," Lily said, dread pooling in her stomach.

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault – you had no idea what would happen." She forced a reassuring smile. "The earrings are brilliant, and if they can use them in the cave, then that's still worth something. A lot, actually."

Caradoc nodded, and turned toward the horizon behind them, crossing his arms.

Yet again, there was nothing she could to help the situation. She was just _there_.

But so was Caradoc, in a way.

"D'you mind being left behind on the ship?" she asked.

"Someone has to stay behind, and I'm happy to do it – I'm not the best dueler anyway."

"You're a far sight better than me, I'm sure."

"That's not a fair comparison. I got in all my years at Hogwarts."

Lily compressed her lips. "I still wish I could help more."

"You helped us get here. Don't forget that. Besides, you're keeping me company."

"And watching for Death Eaters."

Caradoc hummed and crossed the ship to stand on the other side, facing out toward the sea. Lily followed him, still carrying Algernon, who made a tiny roar of protest.

"It's fine," Lily said soothingly, and stroked Algernon's head. "We're playing look-out. Meow if you see anything, all right?"

Algernon grumbled and flicked the end of his tail where it hung over her arm.

Of course, Algernon didn't see the ship first. Caradoc did, his eye to the telescope, several minutes later.

"They're here," he said quietly.

"We knew they might," Lily said, "but I'd hoped…."

Somehow the Death Eaters had found them. It seemed surreal that they could be here, too. She and the others had only just found out about the island, and there was no chance that the Death Eaters had coincidentally solved it at the exact same time.

"There are loads of ways of tracking people and things," Caradoc said.

"I imagine so," she said in a hollow voice.

But he was clearly wondering the same thing she was, whether someone in the Order had told. Had been complicit, somehow. Had been convinced, threatened, or worse, had volunteered.

Regardless of how it had happened, though, the Death Eaters were there, and they needed to be dealt with.

"We've got to warn the others," Lily said.

"Patronuses don't work across large stretches of water. The earring was our only connection."

No one had explained what a Patronus was, but it didn't matter if they weren't viable.

"Then one of us needs to go warn them," she said. "I'll do it."

"Lily."

"We can't let them get surprised by an attack, and you can protect the ship better than I can. Why James thought one person—or one person and one effective Squib—would be enough to defend a ship…."

He gave her a smile that verged on sad; resigned, even.

Lily nearly dropped Algernon. "You're not supposed to protect the ship," she said slowly, "are you? You're just the canary in the coalmine."

Caradoc gave her a plaintive look. "We didn't know if they'd beat us here. There was always a risk of them following instead of them beating us here, but since we didn't know, it seemed safer for you to be on board. But now we know. I agree you should leave."

"What about you? What are you supposed to do?"

"James assessed the skills of his crew. I know what the mission priority is, and I'll do what I can to make sure he and the others have the best shot at destroying the prophecy—"

"Not _taking_ the prophecy? Surely we want to know what it is."

"There's no point trying. The only people who can hear the prophecy are the people the prophecy's about – if you even touch a prophecy that's not about you, you go mad."

"This isn't even information gathering?" Lily said, her voice growing louder. Algernon squirmed in her arms. "It's just destruction? All over some bloody prophecy we're not even sure is going to come true?"

"I used to feel that way about them, too. But they do come true, one way or another."

"Caradoc," she pleaded, and she let Algernon hop onto the floor.

"You're best off hiding somewhere on the island – maybe in the caves. You should go before they get close enough to see you."

"What are you supposed to _do_?"

"The ship has defenses," he said simply. "They're only active in the presence of one of the original spellcasters, though. I cast them with Dorcas and James months ago."

"How strong are these defenses, exactly?"

"Oh, it depends on who's trying to break them. I wouldn't be able to do it, but that's also not my strong suit. But don't worry. I'll do my best to make sure you have a way home."

She raked her eyes over him, in case this was the last—

He had more than half a foot on her, but he'd never once loomed over her. He'd never been anything but genuine, and kind-hearted, and now she might never—

She flung her arms around his broad shoulders, hopping up on her toes to reach. He hugged her back, and although his eyes were calm, he clung back fiercely.

"Take my earring." He stepped back and reached up to his ear. "You'll get more out of it than I will. Oh, and your cutlass."

He pressed his earring into her palm and stepped into the library.

"Well, then." Lily crouched down to look at Algernon, and he stared up at her, his face serious. "You're in charge of protecting Caradoc, all right? And don't either of you die. Not under any circumstances."

She reached out and ran her hand over his head one more time, and he purred loudly, happily pressing his ears against her palm.

Caradoc returned, sword in hand, and offered it to Lily. She pressed the stud into her ear and strapped the cutlass to her side.

"I'll see you in a bit, then," she said, a few tears blurring her vision.

"See you in a bit," he said, smiling. He was always smiling.

Lily looked at him one more time, his dark hair a stark contrast to the vivid green and blue behind him, and spun around before she lost the nerve to leave him.

He lowered her to the bay in another rowboat, and she set off at once. She hadn't used her arm muscles in months, though. They ached within minutes, but soon enough she slipped off her boots, hopped out of the boat, and pulled it ashore.

Boots back in place, she wobbled her way across the beach—adjusting to land was hard enough on its own, much less on loosely packed sand—and over to the ladder. The Ministry staff had built it out of driftwood, now wind-worn and wrapped in dried seaweed around the bottom. She hauled herself up the ladder and along the path. Grass and flowers nearly obscured the trail, but the packed mud and rock held beneath her feet, leading her up the cliff.

She paused at the top, breathing heavily, and turned back to the bay. The ocean glittered before her, James's ship a dull shade of brown amidst a tableau of color.

It wasn't the last time she'd see it, she told herself. She wouldn't let it be.

She waved at the ship one more time in case Caradoc was watching, and headed down the hill.

Someone had thoughtfully built a steep staircase down into the cave, the opening into the ground ringed with plantlife straining upwards. Lily pulled her wand out of her pocket, cast _Lumos_ , and took a deep breath. The sun and the wonderful sight of plants practically demanded that she stay above ground and savor them, but there was nothing to do but go, and so she stepped away from the beautiful island into a gloomy, dank cave.

Sunlight quickly gave way to darkness, her footsteps quietly echoing off the stone walls. Water dripped quietly in the distance, and she suppressed a shudder at a nearby flutter of wings.

Petunia had been afraid of the dark growing up, but not Lily. Her mum had told her that pirates couldn't be scared of the dark because they so often had to work in it, and since Lily had fancied herself a proper pirate at the age of five, she'd simply pretended that she was about to stumble onto buried treasure.

That was almost true now, only she wouldn't walk away with anything except hopefully her own life, and those of the rest of the crew.

The light from her wand guided her down and down, the air growing chill around her, a wet, clinging cold that seeped through her clothes. She stumbled, stepping down too hard on the next step—no, there was no next step. The stairs had given way to an uneven path.

She walked on, the caves now oppressively silent.

Her fingers smoothed over her pendant. She'd have to ask Remus to teach her a spell to keep the pendant in sterling condition, but that would have to be later, after they'd all got out of this endless cave.

Faltering through the tunnel would have been less eerie if she'd had the comfort the others had had, the voices and footfalls of other people to repel the darkness.

She wished, suddenly, desperately, that she'd thought to bring Algernon with. Caradoc might have been stubbornly attached to the ship, but Algernon might've come with her. Except Caradoc would need the company more than she did, really.

She walked on and on, past the occasional small tunnel leading off to the side, but she didn't take them. The others might have turned at some point, but the largest tunnel disappeared straight ahead, and it seemed the most obvious path. Hopefully the Ministry had hidden the island but not the prophecies themselves.

And then she thought she was fooling herself that it looked a little lighter ahead, dark grey instead of pitch black, but she hurried ahead anyway, her toes whacking into rocks.

As she grew closer, she smiled. Faint light poured into the tunnel from the right up ahead, and she ran the last few steps to the edge of an opening.

She cautiously stepped into a cavernous chamber and flicked her eyes around, searching for the crew. The walls of the cave stretched up overhead, arching over endless rows of wooden shelves stretching out away from her. The candleholders bracketed to the end of each shelf held normal-looking candles, but the steady flames burned blue, just bright enough to illuminate a number painted below each candle.

"Bertie _Botts_?" came Sirius's voice.

Lily spun around, but saw no one.

"What, really?" James said. "I mean, _Sirius_."

The voices coming from the earring were disconcertingly clear, and close, as though James and Sirius stood only a couple feet away from her.

"D'you imagine his empire was foretold?" Sirius asked. "And, more importantly, did he know about it?"

"Imagine the pressure one would feel," Remus said thoughtfully, "knowing one was destined for sugary greatness. The stress of creating salivating treats."

Lily muffled her laugh with her hand.

"I'm trying to _focus_ ," Dorcas said.

"Hang on, was that you, Marlene?" Remus said.

Sirius let out a bark of laughter. "It certainly wasn't Meadowes."

"It's me," Lily said, a few tears springing embarrassingly to her eyes. "Smith."

"Lily."

Her name alone was sufficient to identify James's voice: exasperated, disappointed, and, perhaps she was imagining it, secretly a little pleased.

"I told you, Prongs—"

"The Death Eaters are coming," she said over Sirius. "I had to warn you, and Caradoc agreed I should go."

"He was right," James said. "Constant vigilance, everyone. Really, this time. And, Lily, can you go hide in one of those other tunnels from where we came in?"

"I'd be a sitting duck. I'm safer with you lot."

"Are you at the entrance?" Remus asked. "I'm happy to accept some assistance. Come find me in row eighty-five."

James's sigh carried over the earring perfectly well. "Back to work, everyone."

Lily tried not to let it hurt that James wanted her to hide instead of help. She'd brought her wand and cutlass, true, but if these Death Eaters were as ruthless as the one that had attacked Lily—

She swallowed hard and strode down the cavern, looking for number eighty-five.

As she sped past the rows she caught glimpses of what they stored: each shelf housed dozens of dusty glass orbs that could easily fit in her palm. Not stored on paper, then.

She ducked into row eighty-five and spotted Remus halfway down, crouching to look at the prophecies on the bottom shelf, his wand held up as a light.

"Nice hat," he said.

"Thanks." She squatted down next to him. "What're we looking for, exactly?"

"The prophecy label should mention You Know Who or The Dark Lord." He spoke quickly, and softly. "We're attempting not to talk too much, but some of us find this an unprecedented challenge."

Someone that sounded an awful lot like Sirius scoffed over the earring, and Remus and Lily shared a smile.

She turned to the shelf, wand held aloft, and read. Each prophecy had a yellowing slip of parchment attached to the shelf underneath it that displayed a string of letters, or sometimes a name or event, in spidery writing.

There was no fluttering or dripping here; only the shuffle of their feet, the hushed noises of breathing, and the occasional location update from someone over the earring. And yet Lily strained her ears, dreading the echo of unfamiliar footsteps creeping up on them, as her eyes skimmed over shelf after shelf of prophecies.

The individual labels began to blur together, letters and dates and notes all mashed up together in her head, her mind hovering above, trying not to get lost in the details of the prophecies.

She and Remus moved down each row with as much haste as they dared. When they finished a row, Remus quietly announced the row they moved into. By the sound of the others' reports, they'd spaced themselves out fairly evenly and were all moving in the same direction.

The Death Eater ship would have made it to the bay ages ago by now. Caradoc might have defended himself and the ship, or he might have—

Lily wrenched her thoughts back to the prophecy labels, and reread the one she'd skipped over.

She could do nothing for Caradoc now, except help make this mission worth it—

Someone moved.

Someone close.

Lily and Remus both spun to face the end of the row. A masked person leapt out from behind the shelves, wand raised and mouth casting a curse—

Remus's shield snapped up into place around the two of them, and the bolt of blue light dissipated into the shield, which briefly warped around the impact.

"I take it they've joined us," James said.

Their attacker had donned a long, hooded black robe and a bone-white mask with slits cut over the eyes. The Death Eater fired off another curse, and Remus twitched his arm, his shield unwavering.

"An accurate assessment," Remus said tersely. "Lily, I can't hold this, you've got to—"

Another spell slammed into the shield, and though the jet of light vanished, so did the shield.

"Get out of here, Lily." Remus shook his wand hand in pain, grunting a bit.

Lily raised her wand higher. The Death Eater had already fired off another curse while Remus's shield fell, this one headed her way, and Lily shouted, " _Protego_!"

She could feel the strength of her shield through her wand, but whatever the Death Eater had cast shattered it instantly, and Lily stumbled back a step.

"I'm not leaving," she said.

Remus glimpsed back at her, looking more concerned than annoyed. He turned away in time to face a handful of fist-sized blades of light that the Death Eater had flung at him. He Conjured a wooden shield and winced as the blades sunk into it. He'd caught most of them, but one blade flew past him and toward Lily, who darted to the side to avoid it.

The Death Eater paused in his attack to erect a shimmering wall of light along both shelves, and Remus took advantage. A net of rope sprung from his wand, stretched itself wide, and hurtled toward the Death Eater. The Death Eater slashed his wand as it neared him. The net split in two, the pieces grazing by his side as they flew past him. A piece of the net caught on his hand, and he shook it off while erecting a shield with his wand hand. Remus's next spell, a muted yellow one, bounced off the shield, flew toward the shelves, and then bounced again off the shimmering wall, flying up over the shelves to disappear into darkness.

Spell after spell crackled through the air as Remus and the Death Eater volleyed back and forth more quickly than Lily could properly follow. Remus's wand moved with restraint and elegance, while the Death Eater's seemed jagged, his movements sharp and hasty.

Lily stepped back to give herself more space for any stray spells, and, she told herself, to better listen for any attackers that might come from the other direction. She kept an eye on Remus and the empty end of the row, dropping to the ground when another stray spell bounced off the shimmering wall of light, her palms scraping against the rocky floor.

" _Protego_!" came Peter's trembling voice.

Lily silently wished him luck – she couldn't speak without distracting the others.

A sizzling black spell ripped through another of Remus's shields, and Remus ducked, but not quickly enough. The spell tore along his left shoulder, leaving a bloody trail in its wake. Lily's mouth made a strange half-noise, and her fists clenched around her useless weapons. Remus curled in on himself, gasping in pain, and then fired off a spell of his own, one that struck low, glancing along the Death Eater's leg. The Death Eater staggered, and then righted himself.

"Death Eater joining me in row one-seventeen," Marlene said over the earring. " _Impedimenta_!"

Peter's and Marlene's voices called out Latin words and phrases that Lily was nowhere close to understanding, but their tone she could read well enough: determination with a vein of fear running through it.

Remus's next spell seemed to go awry – it bounced off a shimmering wall with a wide enough angle that it bypassed the Death Eater entirely, landing on the floor behind him. The Death Eater waved his wand in a huge arc that sent a noxious-looking arc of liquid at Remus, who heaved his wand upward, pulling up with it a wall of thin, black fire that consumed the liquid with a loud hiss.

Remus had barely let the fire vanish before he bellowed, " _Serpensortia_!"

A five-foot long, ebony snake erupted from the end of his wand and launched itself toward the Death Eater, who yelped and took a step back with his good leg.

And suddenly the Death Eater was tipping backward, his arms flailing as his leg slid out from under him—

Ice. Remus had cast a patch of ice on the ground behind the Death Eater.

The Death Eater's wand flew free of his hand to cartwheel in the air, and it clattered to the floor while he landed on his back with a thud.

Immediately he began to scramble to his feet, but Remus's _Stupefy_ came swiftly, and perfectly, and the Death Eater dropped back into a motionless mound on the cave floor.

The shimmering walls around the shelves disappeared into an acrid-smelling smoke.

" _Reducto_!" shouted Marlene.

Sirius had been found, too, and laughed tauntingly in between spells.

Lily forced herself to focus on their own attacker, and guarded Remus's back while they approached the Death Eater.

"What do we do?" she asked.

Remus did not look at her, his attention fixed on the prone Death Eater. "We can't leave him." He raised his wand.

Lily did not know if he was going to—she dared not ask—and her eyes flicked around. "Can't we—I dunno—knock him out permanently? Or disable him?"

"Lily," Remus said, deathly firm.

She looked at his shoulder, where blood stained his white shirt.

"It's all right," he said, following her gaze. "I'm plenty scarred already."

She turned back to the Death Eater, his mask blue in the candlelight. "The prophecies," she said in a low voice. "Have him take a prophecy."

Remus glanced at the row behind them, and then back at the Death Eater. "Is that any better?" he asked, over Peter's shouted, panicked spellcasting.

"I really don't know."

Remus only deliberated for a moment before nodding, and Lily dragged the Death Eater by the arms over to the nearest shelf. Remus bent down, gently removed the Death Eater's mask with his good arm, and set it aside. Then he pulled up the Death Eater's arm below the wrist, held it over a prophecy on the bottom shelf, and let go.

The Death Eater's hand dropped down, knocking the prophecy sphere off of its stand. The orb rolled away, off the shelf and onto the cave floor, where a divot in the rock caught it.

"Did it work?" Lily asked.

"I don't know," Remus said, looking haunted. "But we've got to keep searching."

Over the earring came a steady stream of shouts, and gasps, and spells. From the sound of it, only James and Dorcas hadn't been discovered yet.

And then Dorcas chuckled darkly. "Hello," she said, and she began to cast in earnest, barking out spells the way she doled out chores on board.

"Carrows the elder has been dispatched," Remus said to the group. "On the ground outside row ninety-three."

"Good riddance," Marlene said. " _Stupefy_!"

"Help," Peter pleaded. "Row fifty-six."

"On my way," James called.

Lily and Remus stepped into a new row to search for the prophecy once more, and she let the abbreviations and the words on the labels fill up her mind. She did not think of the bloody drying on Remus's shirt. She did not think of the soft thud of the prophecy rolling off the shelf and onto stone. She did not think of Marlene's voice growing tired.

There was only shelf after shelf of labels to examine, and glances to check for more Death Eaters.

They moved to another row, and then another, battles raging in their ears.

"Oh, _shit_."

Remus's head snapped up.

" _Shit_ ," Marlene grunted again, and then she groaned. "Shit shit shit," she said, now breathing more heavily, as though running.

"Marlene?" James asked.

"May have, er," she said, panting, "lost my wand—gah!—in one-fifteen."

"I'm in fifty-two – can you make it?"

"We're in ninety-seven," Remus said quickly.

"I'm bringing company!" Marlene said.

Lily stood with her wand raised, waiting, while Remus kept searching, frantically scanning rows.

"You Know Who," Remus breathed, and Lily whirled to face him. He was bent over, fingers swiping dust off the parchment—

Marlene came bolting around the corner, arms pumping frantically, and Lily could hear another set of footsteps closing in on them.

Remus had to finish what he was doing, leaving Lily to defend the three of them, and she _couldn't_ —

"Catch!" Lily shouted, and she tossed her wand toward Marlene.

Marlene was nearly to her now, and she stretched out her arm, palm open, and—

She missed.

The wand soared past her hand and clattered onto the stone floor. Marlene dropped to pick it up, and in that moment, another Death Eater skidded to a halt at the end of the row.

It was the woman who'd attacked Lily on James's ship, _sans_ the robe and mask the others wore.

The woman raised a wand, and Marlene was just standing up again, and Remus was behind Lily saying, "I'm destroying it," and the Death Eater's bright red spell came hurtling toward Remus, right over Marlene's braided hair—

Lily watched, as though at a great distance, as the spell traveled toward them, her mind intuiting what would occur next.

Remus had to break the prophecy. He needed only a second more to do so, a second he would lose, perhaps forever, if that spell hit him.

Marlene could not stop it.

The cutlass could not stop it.

And so Lily took one step to the right.

Red light slammed into her chest, her body jolting back. And as her mind dimmed, her thoughts slipping away from her, her mouth curved into a smile at the delicate sound of splintering glass.


	17. With Proper Grip, At Last

Lily’s body stirred, her mind in the sweet valley between sleep and awareness, the sea rolling comfortingly beneath her. Her hand moved itself up to brush a lock of hair away from her nose—

Her mind ricocheted into consciousness, hands instinctively trying to pull themselves apart, but rope twisted at her wrists.

“It’s all right, Lily,” Remus said from next to her.

A wall of barred iron entrapped her, Remus, and Caradoc—she let out a breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding—all three of them similarly bound with their hands in front of them. Her legs had been left free, and she maneuvered herself into a sitting position and rested her back against the wall of the ship.

The Death Eaters had clearly set out with different goals than James had: They had a brig and a dozen odd beds on their gun deck, but they lacked the eponymous cannons.

Outside the brig, a long, thin table sat along the edge of the ship. Lily’s cutlass lay on top of it next to her mokeskin pouch, both tantalizingly out of reach. A nearby ladder led to the main deck, letting through sunlight and distant shouts.

She’d made it through captivity on James’s ship in one piece, but somehow she doubted the Death Eaters would be as trusting or hospitable as James had been. There would be no leveraging their good will. And, assuming they were headed back to England now, there’d be no escape into a city, or at least not for a long while. If she even made it that far into the journey.

But unlike her previous imprisonment, this time she didn’t have to rely on only herself.

“Got an escape plan?” she asked Remus.

He sat in the corner, eyes alert and legs straight in front of him, dried blood marring his sleeve. “I remain hopeful.”

Gold still glinted on his earlobe, so he wasn’t being entirely foolish.

Lily brought her hands up to let her fingers scramble through her hair until they settled on her hairpin. It had always felt different to her, somehow alive with a faint hum of magic. There was definitely still hope of escape, she thought as she eyed the large keyhole in the brig door.

She turned to Caradoc on her other side. He was alive, at least, although he slouched against the wall, head lolled sideways in sleep. The beginnings of bruises decorated one eye, and fresh blood ran in a lone rivulet from his nostril alongside his mouth.

“What happened?” she asked Remus.

“The prophecy’s destroyed,” he said, and he didn’t appear to be able to announce it without smiling a little. “Another Death Eater appeared after you were knocked out. Marlene and I tried to hold them off, but unfortunately I found myself bested, and I’m not sure what happened next. Last I heard, everyone else was still alive in the cave.”

Lily nodded. The others were probably still alive. They were all skilled, and clever, and it was unfathomable that they—

They were alive. They had to be.

She glanced toward Caradoc. “Is he all right?”

“I’m fine,” Caradoc murmured. He groaned and sat up straight, hands brushing away the blood on his upper lip. Hands were no neat cleaning tool, though, and he ended up smearing it instead, giving himself a grotesque moustache.

Lily scooted sideways to sit closer to him and examined the small cuts and scrapes along one side of his face.

“They don’t look too serious, just a black eye,” she said. “Are you hurt anywhere else?”

Caradoc cracked a smile. “They had other priorities.”

“The ship?” Remus asked, quietly, as though afraid to hear the answer.

“Intact, last I saw,” Caradoc said, and Remus let out a contented breath. “Two of them broke through the repelling defenses. They took the woman out of the magazine and tried to break the other spells, but they couldn’t manage, so they gave up to go after the prophecy.”

“And Algernon?” Remus said.

“Hidden in a cupboard. They didn’t know to look for him, so I think he made it through.”

It had not occurred to Lily that they would have killed a cat. Then again, Algernon would have immediately retaliated if they’d attacked Caradoc in front of him.

“He’s fine,” James said over the earring.

Lily closed her eyes and bit back a sob of relief, his voice falling over her like cool water over a fresh burn.

“Hullo, James,” she said softly.

“We’re very pleased to hear that,” Remus said. “And your charming voice, too, I suppose.”

James laughed. “Don’t think we’re going to let them sail away with you.”

“The ship’s all right?” Caradoc asked.

Lily repeated his inquiry to James.

“Of course it bloody is, you stubborn tosser.”

“He says yes,” she said, “and he called you a tosser.”

“Well,” Caradoc said thoughtfully, “you called me a canary.”

“I called you a canary in a specific context.”

“Canary?” James asked. “Is that some sort of Muggle insult?”

“Oh, yes,” she said. “Canary’s the worst insult you can give someone in the Muggle world.”

Caradoc cocked his head at her, his smile broadening.

“Well, don’t call him that,” James said. “He kept my beautiful ship alive and we’re going to do the same for you lot.”

“Are you calling me beautiful, James?” Remus said. “You flirtatious sod.”

“I am, as a matter of fact. You’re all so beautiful I’ll just have to come rescue you to prove it to you.”

Remus held up a hand, and Lily and Caradoc immediately stopped their laughter, their smiles dropping. A pair of feet had appeared on the ladder, briefly blocking out the sunlight shining down from above.

A man with long, white-blond hair elegantly climbed down, still in his black robes but his mask gone. He stepped away from the ladder to allow someone else passage, and this one Lily already knew.

The woman from the magazine and the blond man approached the brig, equally smug looks on their faces. The woman Lily could understand—turnabout was a beautiful thing, provided you were on the right side—but the man….

He had sharp, condescending features, and he strolled like a man in a park, simply savoring his time. He flicked his dark wand to send tiny balls of light flitting about the deck, and they zoomed around to settle on several candles hovering in the air.

He stood in front of the brig, the woman triumphant at his side, and considered Lily.

“Dearborn and Lupin I know,” he said, “but I don’t believe we’ve met.”

“Lily,” the woman supplied. “Lovely Lily who spared me from being killed by McKinnon.”

“She didn’t,” he murmured, with a sidelong glance at the woman. “Oh, a foolish choice, indeed.”

“She’s a Mudblood, Malfoy. Not sure how she fell in with this lot, since she was practicing Stupefying me. Couldn’t even do it properly.”

“Two Mudbloods and a werewolf,” Malfoy drawled. “My, but Dumbledore grows desperate.” He walked over to pick up Lily’s cutlass from the table—with poor grip, she noted absently—and angled it, watching the way the candlelight played off the steel. “That does explain this. A rather primitive tool, but that’s to be expected.” He set down the cutlass and picked up bag instead, dumping out her coins. “Muggle money, I expect. Are you sure she’s got any magic at all, Kipling?”

“Difficult to tell, really. I’m not sure why she stole all that magic if she wasn’t even going to learn to use it properly.”

“ _Stole_ ,” Lily said, making to stand up. “I didn’t _steal_ anything—”

Malfoy twitched his wand where it hung by his side, and an invisible force wrenched on Lily’s shoulders, forcing her back to the ground.

“I assume you’re not alone anymore,” James said quietly in her ear. “Wait for my signal before you try to escape.”

Malfoy and Kipling could both fuck off – James was coming for them. And Lily could do her part to help him find them.

“You’ve gone very Muggle, locking us in the brig,” she said. “Don’t Death Eaters have something more, I dunno, magical?”

“Would you prefer the magazine?” Kipling asked, narrowing her eyes. She frowned, and took a step forward. “You didn’t have an earring before. Neither of you did.”

At Malfoy’s nod, Kipling opened the door of the brig and stepped inside, wand raised. She leaned over Lily, her lack of recent bathing unpleasantly noticeable in close proximity, and pried the earring out of place. Then she stepped back, her gaze dropping to Lily’s neck.

“Might as well take that, too.” Kipling reached around Lily’s neck to undo the clasp of her necklace.

Kipling could have the earring—James was coming for them—but that was Lily’s _necklace._

Lily took the opportunity to bite Kipling’s arm. Hard.

Kipling yelped and snatched her arm out of Lily’s mouth, stumbling back a step with the necklace in hand. Then she laughed, low and dark, and glanced back at Malfoy. “Animal-like, you know.”

Lily refused to let her eyes linger on the necklace, even though she felt nude without it, and smirked at Kipling instead.

Remus’s bite posed more of a danger, and Kipling made him turn around before she took his earring. Goods in hand, she backed out of the brig and slammed the door shut.

She dropped the earrings into Malfoy’s waiting palm, and he set them on the table, gold glinting in the dim light. He cast a few nonverbal spells at one of them and smiled, thin and narrow like a cat, as he held one up aloft between thumb and forefinger.

“Potter, I assume,” he said smugly. He paused, head cocked, listening. “Lily, too? She’s pretty, in a rather bourgeoisie way.” He paused again, and then chuckled. “I’m not certain you’re in a place to be making threats.”

Meanwhile Kipling had strung Lily’s necklace around her throat and was now running her fingers over the pendant.

Lily’s toes curled in her boots. Patient. She had to be patient.

“Such hubris,” Malfoy said to James, glancing at Remus. “I rather believe I’ve more information than you think.”

He paused as a new set of feet climbed down the ladder, and Lily’s breath caught.

Severus. Wearing those awful black robes, but no mask.

Except for the couple inches he’d grown since she’d last seen him, he could have been the same fifteen-year-old boy who’d promised to write her every week from Hogwarts. At least in terms of physical appearance, anyway. Rail thin, pale skin, long hair. But she’d never seen him look so haughty before, his nose upturned as he stalked over to Malfoy.

He wouldn’t be expecting her here – his eyes stayed on Malfoy, and then they glanced over to the brig, and surely he’d notice her—

But he looked right over her. He’d definitely seen her, but he flat out ignored her, his lip curled.

“It smells atrocious in here,” he said as Malfoy set down the earring again.

“Mudbloods,” Kipling agreed.

Lily tried not to stare at Severus, tried to pretend it wasn’t shocking to see him there – James and the others had warned her he was part of that side, but seeing him there, with them, with that God awful _look_ on his face….

Whatever cracks had been mended in her heart by hearing that he was alive shattered anew, this time deeper.

“And wolves,” Severus drawled, eyeing Remus. “What are we supposed to do with this, Lucius? We’ve nowhere to house it come the full moon.”

“I don’t intend on keeping it that long.” Malfoy picked up the cutlass once more, weighing the feel of it in his palm and approaching the brig.

She’d defended Severus to James. To everyone on the ship. So certain, she’d been, that he was truly on the right side. And yet there he stood, casually discussing murdering Remus in front of her, with absolutely nothing to indicate he didn’t truly want to be there, didn’t fully agree….

“The Muggles have begun acting out,” Severus said, sounding rather bored by it. “I suspect the sudden madness of Carrows and Travers is interfering with the Imperius Curse.”

Malfoy sighed, in a put-upon way, and set the cutlass back down. “Priorities.”

“It might be wise to stop on one of the islands and acquire new Muggles. The current set won’t last much longer.”

“They’ll endure.” Malfoy handed the earrings to Severus. “Toss these overboard. It’s only Potter on the other end.”

Kipling smirked at Lily one last time before the three of them disappeared up the ladder.

Within seconds Lily was on her feet and striding toward the door of the brig, hands reaching up to her hair. A twist of the hairpin allowed her out onto the gun deck, unencumbered save for the ropes. Heart hurtling against her chest, she darted over to the table, fetched her dagger out of her pouch, and sped back into the brig, pulling the door shut behind her on the way.

Remus nodded at Lily, impressed, and Caradoc hid a smile.

“Malfoy’s always been a bit of a hypocrite when it comes to hubris,” Remus said, watching Lily settle into her previous position on the ground.

She tucked her dagger under a thin, ratty blanket heaped next to her. Either the dagger or the cutlass could have cut them free immediately, but it was worthless to free themselves if they had nowhere to run but the ocean. They could escape, just not yet.

She nearly brought up Severus’s lack of response with Remus, but it seemed unwise to mention it within a mile of other Death Eaters. They already knew she was a Muggle-born, but somehow it would be awful if they knew she’d been Severus’s friend. Maybe it would have been worse for him than for her. In fact, it probably would have been. But despite the sharp ache in her chest—he hadn’t saved her, hadn’t even _acknowledged_ her existence—she couldn’t deliberately harm him. He’d offered her one final kindness, one last piece of advice before disappearing years ago, and she could do the same for him.

And then they would be through. Forever, as far as she was concerned.

Malfoy returned shortly, and strolled across the room to pick up the cutlass again. “Do your compatriots know that you killed Jacobs last month, wolf?”

Remus looked up at him mildly. “I wasn’t aware I was on trial.”

“No trial. I only wanted them to be aware of the dangers of associating with a werewolf. Not that I should expect that level of intelligence from Mudbloods, I suppose.”

“This team of werewolves and Mudbloods destroyed the prophecy,” Lily pointed out.

“I suppose you were rather incapable of following the subsequent events,” Malfoy said, opening the brig. “But prophecy spheres have an interesting quality.”

Malfoy waved his wand in a large arc, shooting out a web of light that formed into a new, ethereal wall in the brig, dividing Remus and Malfoy from the others.

Lily made to stand up, but a clammy hand settled on her arm. Caradoc had moved closer, and was watching Malfoy with keen eyes.

“There’s nothing we can do,” he said, quietly enough that Malfoy didn’t hear.

“When a prophecy sphere shatters,” Malfoy continued, “it recites the prophecy one final time. And the wolf here, as the culprit behind destroying the original copy, likely overheard it.”

“I didn’t,” Remus said simply. “There was too much noise on the earring, and I had to duel you when you suddenly appeared, if you recall.”

“And then your chivalry rather got the best of you, didn’t it? Although I suppose your life is less significant. Perhaps you do know your place after all.”

Malfoy advanced on Remus and cast a spell that dissolved the ropes, and another in quick succession that sent shackles snapping at Remus’s wrists. The irons yanked Remus’s arms over his head, forcing him to his knees, and connected with a chain that dropped out of the ceiling. A final spell Vanished the bloodied sleeve from Remus’s wounded arm.

Remus eyed his new trappings passively. He had to have been terrified, though; nothing had ever horrified Lily as much as Malfoy’s eager smirk at that moment, a smile full of dreadful promise.

“Now,” Malfoy said. “Let’s just find out whether you did hear anything, shall we?”

He examined the edge of the blade, and then swiped it in a long line along Remus’s damaged shoulder, drawing a suppressed noise of protest out of Remus’s throat. Blood welled up around the wound and trickled down, leaving stark tracks along his skin.

Lily choked back a cry. Caradoc rested his shoulder against hers, and they leaned in on each other, a unified front for Remus.

“This should be an interesting experiment,” Malfoy said. “I’ve heard werewolves have tremendous healing abilities. And I’ve never heard anyone discuss the effects of Muggle instruments on werewolves before.”

Remus swallowed hard. “I didn’t hear any of the prophecy.”

Malfoy swiped the blade again, overlaying it across his first cut, creating a long, angry X. A strangled, whimpering noise escaped from Remus.

“I remain tragically unconvinced,” Malfoy said.

Apparently this was going to go on indefinitely. Malfoy shredding Remus’s arm to pieces, Remus insisting he knew nothing, and on and on, and suddenly Lily had broken away from Caradoc and risen to her feet.

“Stop it!” She took step forward. “He doesn’t _know_. How is he supposed to prove it to you? You can’t prove a negative!”

Malfoy slowly turned toward Lily, head tilted, his long hair swaying slightly. “You’re rather new at this, aren’t you?”

“She’s not in the Order,” Remus said, between deep breaths. “She ended up on our ship by accident. She hasn’t lived in England for years.”

“And yet she was in the Cave of Prophecies. Rather implies she’s in the Order, no? Or at least an ally, if nothing else.” Malfoy turned back to Remus. “Sadly I know exactly how useless she is, at least with regards to the information I require. You’re the only one who could have heard, wolf. I’ll deal with her later. Or maybe I’ll let Severus have a go. He has a bit of a predilection for red-haired women.”

Lily shivered in revulsion, and pointedly did not consider the broader implications because her pain wasn’t important at the moment. Instead she caught Remus’s eye and glanced at the blanket covering the dagger, and then back at him, raising her eyebrows in a question. He discreetly shook his head, making it look like he was adjusting his position.

Malfoy raised the cutlass again, and Caradoc pulled Lily back down, and Severus was upstairs somewhere with Kipling, and no one was going to put an end to this.

All Lily’s weapons and all her wits could do nothing to stop it.

And so she watched, crying, as Malfoy made another cut, and then another, and then another, on and on until Remus had more blood than skin showing on his arm.

Malfoy worked methodically, each slice precise, inspecting each new injury with a sick fascination.

Lily couldn’t feel her hand anymore, it clung so tightly to Caradoc’s. His face had as many tears as hers did, and it was all for nothing because Remus had gone limp at some point, twitching at each new cut, his voice ragged.

And then, right as Malfoy had raised the cutlass once more, something boomed in the distance. The whole boat tipped slightly to the side, and then righted itself, overcorrecting a bit.

Lily closed her eyes, savoring the noise. Cannon fire had never sounded so miraculously beautiful.

Malfoy pulled back, eyes darting around. “Potter,” he spat.

He strode out of the brig, dropped the cutlass onto the table, and disappeared above deck.

When he’d gone, the barrier between Lily and Remus fell, and she was at his side in an instant. The wall of light had vanished, but the shackles had no keyhole for Lily to unlock.

Remus struggled to smile. “You two should go.”

Caradoc had already slit the ropes around his hands and held out the dagger toward Lily. She let him free her and turned back to Remus.

They had to take care of his arm if they were going to get to safety. She reached for the hem of her shirt, but Caradoc was a step ahead of her. He’d removed his shirt and began tearing at it with the dagger, ripping it into long strips that he handed to Lily, who wrapped them delicately around Remus’s arm.

The ship rocked again, and Lily could hear shouting through the ladder hole.

“You’ve only got one chance,” Remus said weakly. “Don’t wait for me.”

“We’re not leaving you,” Lily said.

“We’re really not,” Caradoc said.

Everything seemed terribly clear cut, and distant. There was no time to panic about Remus’s arm or whether Severus had truly turned on her. They had to escape before Malfoy killed all of them, or found out whatever secrets Caradoc and Remus did know about the Order.

Of course, she hadn’t quite figured out how they’d get off the ship without running into more Death Eaters, but the priority was freeing Remus. And they’d need a wand for that, which meant they needed a Death Eater.

They’d have to wait for one to come down.

“Ambush?” Caradoc said.

Lily nodded. She unlocked the brig door with her hairpin, grabbed her cutlass—with proper grip, at last—and hid out behind the ladder, Caradoc at her side.

They lay in wait silently, and that was perfectly fine. She had no time for words at the moment. Her ears strained to hear the sounds of someone approaching amidst the shouting above, the boom of nearby cannons, and the harsh cracks of splintering wood.

From what they could overhear, Malfoy and his crew were in a panic, uncertain of how to defend against these attacks, much less volley back.

Within minutes—delicate, precious minutes of Remus’s nearly inaudible whimpering—a pair of feet appeared on the ladder.

Lily struck out with the cutlass, slicing along the first calf that appeared.

Kipling shouted and fell backwards off the ladder, landing with a thud on the deck. Caradoc immediately hopped on top of her, pinning her wrists to the ground with one hand and covering Kipling’s mouth with the other. While Kipling struggled, Lily knelt down and rummaged through Kipling’s pockets.

She withdrew Kipling’s new wand and ran back to Remus, who let out a weary sigh when she offered him the wand. But mercifully, whatever damage Malfoy had wrought, he hadn’t stolen Remus’s basic instinct to live. Remus muttered a spell to release the shackles, and he drooped under his own weight. Thankfully Remus wasn’t Caradoc’s size, and Lily managed to gingerly help him out of the brig.

“Is there a way off this ship from down here?” Caradoc asked Kipling.

It was muffled by his hand, but she was definitely laughing at him.

“Can’t we just blow a hole in the side of the ship?” Lily asked. “There must be a spell for that.”

Caradoc looked down at Kipling, and then shook his head at Lily. “They’ve probably warded it against spell damage, like we have ours. They’re not idiots.”

Remus made a faint noise of agreement, and Lily helped him perch on the edge of the table. She turned back to Caradoc, her pouch in one hand, her cutlass in the other.

“Then we’ve got to find a way above board without being seen,” she said. “I’ve got a candle—”

A cannonball burst into the gun deck, far enough away not to hurt any of them, but close enough that several splinters of wood scratched against Lily’s face, the floor shaking beneath them. Sunlight flooded in through the new hole in the ship, and whether James had intended that hole for them or not, Lily sent him a mental prayer of thanks.

“Looks like you didn’t ward against Muggle attacks,” Caradoc said to Kipling, smiling grimly. “Hubris, indeed.”

Lily managed a smile at Remus. “Escape path just opened up. Sure you want us to leave you behind?”

“As long as it’s convenient,” Remus said, “I suppose I can tag along.”

“What do we do with her?” Caradoc twitched his head toward Kipling. A pool of blood had formed under her leg, some of it soaking into his boots.

They couldn’t leave her awake and well, not if they wanted to escape. They had her wand, though, and even Lily could probably manage to Stupefy her at this point.

But there were no prophecies here – unless Remus or Caradoc knew a spell to induce madness, Kipling would remain a threat when she awoke. And she might come after them again later, even more enraged that they’d escaped her.

The choice was clear.

“I saved her life once already,” Lily said, although she hadn’t been intending to speak.

Caradoc said nothing, looking up at Lily passively.

If Remus had been in better condition, he might’ve done it. But he wasn’t, and Caradoc would never.

“She didn’t respect the Life Debt she owes you,” Remus said, his voice strained. “Poor form, for a pureblood.”

There was no time to debate the matter. They had to act, and jump, and swim. They could not dither, and yet Lily’s mind remained a blank slate, a beach wiped clean by the ocean.

Lily crossed the deck and looked down at Kipling’s hard, defiant eyes. Caradoc might suffocate her eventually from sheer weight on her chest.

But they didn’t have time for that.

Lily swallowed. She’d wanted to spare this woman’s life at the vote, and she had saved her from Marlene, and it hadn’t affected this woman’s mind at all – she’d knocked Lily out in the cave, hadn’t even hesitated as she’d done it. She’d done nothing to restrain Malfoy from torturing them. Hadn’t said a word about their overall humane and respectful treatment of her during her own captivity. And then she’d taken Lily’s necklace, which still hung tauntingly around her thin neck.

Kipling would keep coming after people like Lily and Caradoc, keep trying to kill them. Lily could not convince her with actions, could not change her worldview with words. Kipling thought Lily and Caradoc and Remus were scum that she could torture and—and _kill_. She’d tried to kill Lily that first night in Oporto, and Lily had been pretending that hadn’t been the case, but it had been. Kipling had tried to kill Lily, and Lily had saved her, and Kipling had not cared one bit. Kipling would only take Lily’s escape as fuel, as proof that Lily needed to be put down like a dog.

Tears sprang to Lily’s eyes, and she hastily swiped them away.

This was not some storybook, where the villain could be redeemed. This was not some fairytale, where magic would save Lily in the end.

This was war.

This was war, and it was awful.

She tucked her pouch into her dress, and grasped the cutlass handle with both hands. It wasn’t a natural position, but it was steadier, and she didn’t want to have to do it more than once, had to get it right—

Lily let out a sob, and killed Kipling.

The cutlass slid over her throat with monstrous ease. A terrible gurgle imprinted itself into Lily’s ears, and she looked away when she’d finished, letting the sword fall out of her hands. The blade rang out against the wooden floor, but it did not matter. She would not need to use it again.

Caradoc finally stood up, his hands sprayed with blood and his boots soaked. He hugged Lily briefly, and together they helped Remus to the hole in the side of the ship.

Lily no longer had to think about anything. The remaining parts of the plan were clear, and her body operated the way it knew it must.

She didn’t look back, and jumped.


	18. The Summer Wind

The swim to James’s ship wouldn’t have taken as long if Remus’s arm hadn’t been so damaged, and if Caradoc and Lily hadn’t both been exhausted, but they made it.

The rest of the crew shouted and lowered the rowboat as they approached. Lily and Caradoc pushed a delirious Remus inside first and climbed in after him.

The rowboat moved steadily up alongside the ship, and for the first time, Lily looked back. Large holes punctured the side of the Death Eaters’ ship walls and sails, and a thick plume of smoke spiraled out of the forecastle.

Already James’s ship was sailing away, the battle abandoned.

Won, technically.

Somehow Caradoc found the strength to carry Remus out of the boat and laid him on the deck in front of a waiting, stricken Marlene. She set to work at once, shouting at Peter to go grab her things from her trunk and Conjuring a pillow to set under Remus’s head. Sirius leapt down half the staircase from the sterncastle and bolted over to them, shouting desperately, “Moony!”

James hovered around the edges, shifting his weight anxiously. There was little for him to do but watch.

Lily could relate.

She glanced down at her hands. All of Remus’s blood had washed off in the swim, leaving her hands as clean as when she’d first boarded James’s ship. In the literal sense, at least.

She climbed out of the boat at last, and suddenly found herself being thoroughly kissed.

“You idiot,” James breathed, and then he captured her lips again.

Lily pressed a hand lightly against his chest, and he pulled back, a faint line on his brow.

“Not right now, okay?” she managed to say, her throat rough from seawater. “I’m just—”

“Right, right.” He brushed a wet lock of hair out of her face. “You’re probably tired.”

Everyone else had vanished into their own tasks, Healing and navigating and sailing, leaving James and Lily alone by the rowboat.

No one else would hear. And she was safe now, and Remus and Caradoc were free, and her legs nearly gave out beneath her.

“James,” she said, voice cracking, “I killed her.”

His arms pulled her in tight, and she pressed her face into his neck, and she cried.

Sometime later—her mind had stopped functioning, stopped noticing anything other than James’s presence, and how much she _hurt_ —he drew her into his cabin. They lay together in his bed with their arms around one other, James murmuring platitudes in her ear, Lily whispering _I’m sorry_ into the crook of his neck a hundred times or more.

James had delicately removed Algernon from the room, leaving them alone with the sound of waves trickling in through his open windows. But no matter how many times she apologized, she felt wretched, and hollow, and she cried until she finally, mercifully fell asleep.

\--

She awoke to the afternoon sun on her face, James’s blankets tucked tightly around her, and Algernon curled up at her side, purring gently.

Sleep was often the best healer of all, besides time. But sleeping for hours hadn’t changed anything for Lily. Not this time.

James’s bed was warm and soft, and she could easily have stayed there for days. But her throat throbbed, and her stomach growled, and she was not, after all, ready to die just yet.

She pushed the blankets off and swung her legs over the edge of the bed, her muscles twinging. Between rowing to shore and walking through caves and swimming to freedom, her body had got more use in half a day than in the previous two weeks combined.

Algernon stirred next to her, and padded across the blankets to cuddle in her lap.

Her stomach grumbled again while she pet his ears. Algernon meowed toward her stomach, annoyed, and she looked up to see a covered dinner tray on James’s table. A few glass bottles filled with colorful potions sat in a neat row next to a pitcher of water.

Caradoc’s cooking hadn’t wavered in quality, but Lily ate mechanically. She managed enough to quell her stomach, downed most of the water, and finished with whatever remedies Marlene had given her.

Eating had at least given her mind something to focus on, and she wandered out of James’s cabin to find some other distraction, anything rather than face herself alone any longer.

She passed through the library and felt like a stranger in there. All their notes and books lay exactly where they’d left them yesterday, quills sitting in inkwells.

It had only been yesterday that they’d solved the map. Yesterday that they’d arrived in the Azores.

This morning that they’d destroyed the prophecy.

How strange, that she’d killed someone in the morning. Killing seemed like something that should have happened at night, when darkness obscured faces and bloodstains.

She hurried through the library, Algernon at her side, and stepped out into the warm air on the main deck.

Peter stood in the crow’s nest, Sirius cast spells at the foresails, and James manned the helm. It was all so utterly normal, and unchanged.

She joined James upstairs, but Algernon lingered behind her, hissing softly.

James smiled sadly at his cat, and then looked up at Lily. “Hullo.”

“Hi,” she managed, and at least Marlene’s elixirs had cured her throat.

“Can you keep an eye on Algernon for a while? He’s a bit angry with me.”

“Of course he is. You didn’t say goodbye.”

James averted his eyes, hands gripping the helm tighter. “I couldn’t,” he said in a low voice. “He would’ve demanded to come with, and I would’ve had to lock him up and—and I’m a terrible coward and he deserves better.”

Algernon made a contented noise. Lily bent down to pick him up, cradling him in her arms, and he licked her hand.

“Marlene can get you some fresh clothes when she wakes up,” James said. “I’d have got you some already, but she took care of Remus and Caradoc and then she sort of passed out.”

Lily looked down at Algernon, suddenly deprived of words.

“What happened in the caves?” she asked. That would not require her to talk, or to think.

She leaned against the railing and listened as James explained. Apparently the Death Eaters had seen little point in hanging around if the prophecy was lost, and they’d made off with Lily and Remus as soon as possible. Sirius had sent a Death Eater into prophecy-induced madness, and Dorcas had killed another when the Death Eaters began their retreat.

“Peter’s leg got a bit messed up, and Sirius got knocked out for a few hours,” James said, “and Dorcas’s hair—er, best not mention that—although actually she’s dead proud, so go ahead, I s’pose—and Marlene’s down a finger. But that’s not bad, all things considered. I mean, except for you and Remus and Caradoc.”

“Caradoc was just a little beat up,” Lily said. “Remus had only got his shoulder hurt until Malfoy—” She broke off, hugging Algernon closer.

“Caradoc told me,” James said gently. “Malfoy—he’s a whole breed of pureblood arse unto himself.”

Lily nodded, biting her lip.

“He didn’t,” James began, and then stopped. “I mean, I thought we’d be quick enough after he talked to me—you didn’t get….”

“Nothing happened to me. Just to Remus.”

“Good. I mean, good that it wasn’t worse. Remus’s going to be fine, you know. His arm might—well, I’m not sure. Marlene said it’s hard to know what’ll happen, what with his furry little problem, but she still patched him up as best she could.”

Words still eluded Lily, and she bobbed her head again. That was good news. It just didn’t feel like it. Nothing felt like good news.

“Caradoc told me….” he said. “He told me Snape was on the ship.”

“He was.”

James waited for her to continue, but when she didn’t, he added, “But he didn’t say anything?”

“He said it smelled like Mudbloods.”

James did not look surprised. He looked sad instead, mouth twisting. “I’m sorry.”

“You didn’t make him do it. He chose to do that. He chose to pretend he didn’t know me.”

“He might’ve. I mean. I don’t—he’s kind of a terrible person. A lot a terrible person, really. But that’s low, even for him.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Lily’s hand came up to play with her pendant, and then dropped. Her necklace was gone. It was probably caked in dried blood. “I hope I never see him again,” she said, and damned if her voice wasn’t breaking again.

“Oh, Lily.”

He stepped toward her, and Algernon hissed, but Lily set Algernon down and stepped into James’s waiting arms.

He did not kiss her. He did not speak. He ignored the wind, and his ship, and his cat, and he simply held her close.

She could barely stand to be contained within her body at the moment, but with James’s arms warmly wrapped around her shoulders, and one of his hands on the back of her neck…it was almost tolerable.

\--

Finally, when her legs had grown tired from standing, she pried herself away. Even though she trusted James and Marlene, she had to see Remus for herself. James kissed her once on the forehead and let her go.

She waved at Sirius from the main deck, and he waved back, wand still aimed high above him.

“Welcome back aboard!” he shouted.

“Thanks!” she called back, and it hurt, somehow, to be that loud.

She stuck her head in the door to the common room to find Dorcas lounging on the sofa, staring out the windows in the front of the ship. Dorcas sat up a bit when at the sound of the door opening, flashed Lily a thumbs up, and flopped back down. Her red scarf had disappeared, as had half her hair. The little that remained on one side of her head had been shorn down close to her scalp.

“Nice hair,” Lily said.

“Good work not dying.”

Lily almost smiled at that, and made for the gun deck.

Remus was awake when she found him, his good arm propping up a book on his chest, a candle bespelled to hover near his head. She sat down at the foot of his bed and rubbed his shin by way of greeting.

“Hi,” she said.

He set the book page-down on his chest. “Hello.”

She couldn’t see his injuries beneath the thick gauze Marlene had swaddled his arm in, but at least he still had the arm, even if it lay stiff at his side.

She glanced toward Marlene’s bed. “Is Marlene….”

He followed her line of sight, and smiled. “Deafening Charm, and just as well. She needs the rest,” he said. “How are you?”

Lily let out a dark laugh. “How am _I_?”

“It’s a reasonable question.”

She resisted the urge to slap his leg for sheer stupidity.

“We’re not talking about me,” she said. “I’m only interested in your health.”

“My arm will recover. I’m more concerned about your sanity.”

“I’m fine,” she lied.

“You killed someone. Your first, I believe.”

She inspected the cannon at her side, which smelled strongly of gunpowder.

“Lily,” Remus said softly.

She did not offer an excuse, or apologize, or cry.

“I killed someone,” she said, and her skin nearly crawled with the truth of it. “I wish I hadn’t.”

“Do you really wish that?”

Really she wished Algernon were there to give her hands something to do, but for now she wrung them together, nails broken and scratched from battle.

“I don’t know,” she said.

His mouth curved into a wry smile. “Welcome to war.”

“How can you—” She folded her arms.

“I’ve killed four people, Lily. They weren’t good people. Only one of those deaths happened while she was actively attacking me.”

She closed her eyes.

“I’m sorry you had to be put in that position,” he said. “I should have done it.”

“You couldn’t.”

“Regardless. The world is safer without her in it.”

“That doesn’t help.”

“I know it doesn’t. Nothing will.”

And she’d suspected that was the case, but it did not help to hear it.

“Why did Malfoy do that?” she asked instead. “Even if you knew the prophecy, you’d never have told him.”

“Because he could,” Remus said simply.

“It would have been easier if it had been him.”

“No,” he said. “It wouldn’t have.”

It wouldn’t have been. It might have been easier to kill Malfoy instead of Kipling at the time, while anger and revenge coursed through her veins, but she would have felt equally remorseful and desolate at the end of it. Equally broken.

“At least you destroyed the prophecy.”

“At least I destroyed the prophecy,” he agreed.

“Did…. Did you lie to Malfoy?”

“Are you asking if I heard the prophecy?”

She nodded tightly.

“There was a ghostly figure speaking, it’s true. But no, I didn’t hear what she said, and it’s best I didn’t.”

He sounded like he was telling the truth, but he could be convincing when he wanted to be.

It was irrelevant, though. Even if he had, she didn’t really want to know.

“We’ll never know his downfall until it comes, I suppose,” she said.

“Not quite. There is still the person to whom the prophecy was initially given.”

“Is that what those initials were on the labels?”

“In addition to the Seer, yes.”

All this work and misery, and it wasn’t even over.

“You Know Who just has to find that person, then,” Lily said with dawning horror.

“Oh,” Remus said, nearly smiling, “I’m fairly confident that You Know Who will never succeed in that endeavor.”

“You recognized the initials?”

“It’s the one man I trust to make the best use of the information, and the one man You Know Who has always feared. Fortune favors us, every now and then.”

Lily glanced down at his arm, and at her blood-free hands, and marveled at Remus’s optimism.

He reached down with his good arm and clasped her hand. “I can’t pass judgment on what you did. I can’t tell you that what you did was right. But I do believe the world is safer without her in it.”

“I don’t think I’m supposed to judge people. I don’t want to. But…I think you’re right.”

“What d’you think?” Marlene asked groggily, sitting up in bed across the deck.

“That you’ve done a marvelous job Healing everyone,” Lily said.

“Ta.” Marlene stretched her arms over her head, twisting her back. Her right hand bore a thick bandage where her smallest finger should have begun. “Remus, dear, how many times do I have to tell you to rest? Do you _want_ me to force a sleeping potion down your throat?”

“Orders duly noted,” Remus said, and he reclaimed his hand from Lily to move his book aside.

“I’ll leave you to it.” Lily stood up and brushed off her trousers. “Marlene, I don’t suppose you’ve got another outfit for me in that trunk, do you?”

Marlene looked like she was going to say something cheeky, based on the smile that twitched at the corners of her mouth, but then she caught herself and cleared her throat. “Of course.”

\--

Adorned in a fresh set of clothes, and with Remus at least feigning sleep, Lily followed Marlene up to the common room. Dorcas had moved elsewhere, and they settled in across from each other at the table, a bowl of fruit from Caradoc between them.

Marlene didn’t move her hand differently now – she opened the door and picked up an apple with her injured hand as normally as she would have with five fingers.

Lily had heard of people feeling limbs even when they weren’t there anymore. Maybe Marlene couldn’t even tell the difference. It was just the little finger, after all.

Marlene cleared her throat, and Lily realized she’d been staring.

“Sorry,” Lily said.

“It’s all right, really.” Marlene gave an affected shrug. “Could be worse.”

Lily gave her a plaintive look. “You don’t have to lie to me. You have just lost a finger.”

Marlene glanced at Lily and then studied her bandage for a moment. “I don’t think I’ve quite—it doesn’t feel gone. Not yet.”

“But it will.”

“Probably. But after everything else…I can handle it.” Marlene took a small bite of her apple. “And you…that is, I heard what happened so you could escape. Are you….”

“I’ll live,” Lily said, though her mind whispered, _Kipling won’t._

“Hopefully we all will, to a ripe old age.”

Lily did not say what immediately came to mind, that that seemed very unlikely. But it looked like Marlene was thinking the same thing, and it did not need to be said.

“Remus’s arm will be okay to use, right?” Lily asked.

“Yes. Whether it’ll hurt—I think we’ll know better after the next full moon. Werewolves are damned good at healing, except against themselves or really Dark curses.”

Marlene’s healing had seemed to help Remus the day after the full moon, though. Particularly when she’d brushed the hair off of his face.

“He seems to appreciate what you do to help him recover after his transformations,” Lily said. “And it’s not just the salves.”

A blush stole across Marlene’s cheeks. “He appreciates it, yeah, but he keeps doing idiotic things like getting captured.”

“Well, that’s not exactly his fault.”

Marlene quirked her mouth to the side, but didn’t reply.

Malfoy had said Remus’s chivalry had got the best of him….

“If you don’t want to tell me what happened,” Lily said, “you don’t have to—”

But Marlene shook her head. Then she set the apple down and folded her arms on the table in front of her, ducking her chin.

“He took that spell for me, Lily,” she said. “It was meant for me and he stepped right in front of it, and look what happened to him.”

“I did the same thing for him.”

“That was for the mission. That was—thank you for that, by the way. I dunno if anyone’s said it, but thanks. Remus—he didn’t do it for the mission.”

 _He did it for you_ , Lily wanted to say. Instead, she said, “It would’ve been you in the brig instead, if he hadn’t done it.”

“I wouldn’t have been tortured,” Marlene said, voice running a bit ragged. “Not like that. I’m not a werewolf and I didn’t have any chance of hearing the prophecy. We all would’ve been better off if he hadn’t been so _ridiculous_ , but he was, and he was tortured, and it should have been _me_ in there with you.”

“It shows he cares about you, though, doesn’t it?” Lily tried. “That he did it for no other reason.”

“You haven’t known him long enough—he’s just—it doesn’t mean he cares about me because he’d do the same for nearly anyone because he’s so—I can’t _take_ someone like that, someone willing to give up everything at the drop of a wand because he thinks he’s not as good….”

Lily fell silent; she had no quick retort to the truth.

“But damned if I won’t Heal him all the same,” Marlene said, “because that’s my bloody job, and I’m good at it, and I’m going to get him his arm back, and then he’ll go mess himself up somewhere else, on some other mission, and I’ll—I’ll fix him, afterwards, and that’s it.”

Marlene took a deep breath and mournfully considered her hand.

“I’m sorry,” Lily said.

“It’s fine.” Marlene straightened up. “You can’t change someone. Not like that. I’ve got my job, and I’ll do it, and he’ll…be him, and I’ll deal with—this.”

No consolations could be made on that front, no apologies made. It was a completely reasonable position to take, and a completely reasonable response.

And yet it still seemed like such a waste.

“You realize you’re wonderful, right?” Lily said. “Healer or otherwise.”

“Thanks.” Marlene smiled grimly. “You’re pretty wonderful yourself, you know. You helped with the map, and helped them escape, and just…thanks. You know. Because it’s my fault you had to do that, because I didn’t do it—”

“ _Don’t_.” Lily kept her hands from tightening into fists, but she still grabbed a pear from the fruit bowl to occupy her hands. “I made my choice. And you would’ve—it would’ve been different if you’d—I’m not sorry you didn’t do it.”

A part of Lily was telling the truth. It would have been different somehow.

But another part kept circling around that moment in the magazine with Marlene, when she’d tugged the sword away from Kipling’s neck. She’d let Marlene draw only a few drops of blood instead of—

Lily wrenched her attention back to Marlene, who looked mulish.

But Lily could not force Marlene to feel differently, just as she couldn’t force herself to feel better about what she’d done to Kipling.

“As long as we’re doing thanks,” Lily said, “thanks for Healing me. Again. And trusting me, when in hindsight you really shouldn’t have.”

“Well, we all do stupid things, don’t we?”

“Yeah.” Lily’s broken nails picked at the skin on the pear. “We really do.”

\--

Remus was disabled and Lily was wrenching herself apart, but the crew celebrated that night anyway, and Lily didn’t fault them. She let Marlene wrangle her into a yellow dress only because it was easier than arguing, and joined everyone else on the main deck once the stars had begun twinkling overhead.

Caradoc had baked a spectacular, three-layer cake, Marlene had spelled colorful balls of light to hang in the air, and Sirius had even offered to play the violin. Remus volunteered to go on watch, but the rest of the crew clamored to shut him up, and they settled him in a chair next to the dance floor.

“No watch,” James said. “Not tonight.”

Under the guise of needing to make Remus feel comforted, Lily brought out another chair and sat with him through the first dances. Sirius had played well during their first party, but tonight his music flowed even better, the notes loud and triumphant.

The others took their turns dancing with one another, eating and drinking and teasing in between. Mostly Lily watched James. He made faces at his crew and invented silly dances and kept shoving food at people. He tried to dip Dorcas, but she stepped out of his grasp and whacked him on the head.

“I don’t dip,” she said.

But through it all, James wore an irrepressible smile, one that any other day would’ve drawn one out of Lily in return. Watching him throw himself in among his mates, looking more perfectly pleased than Lily had ever been in her whole life…. He wasn’t made to take long shifts on watch with no company, to lock himself up in his cabin, to eat every meal alone.

But he would if needed, and he had.

James twirled Marlene, her long hair streaming around, and she winced when he accidentally grabbed her bound knuckle, but it was soon forgotten. Even Dorcas was apparently feeling generous: she accepted Peter’s invitation to dance, and barely even scolded him when he lost the beat.

Halfway through the song, Caradoc turned to Lily and offered her a wand.

Kipling’s original wand.

“Marlene asked me to give this back to you,” he said. “I borrowed it today for cooking, but by all rights it’s yours.”

Lily shook her head. “I don’t want it.”

“It’s customary for you to take it, since you….”

“You need it more anyway, and I just—I don’t want it. You take it.”

He pocketed it. “If you want to keep practicing spells or anything, just let me know and you can have it back.”

She watched Algernon trot happily around Sirius’s feet. “Thanks."

“You’re welcome to use it, too, Remus,” Caradoc said. “You won’t be on duty for a while, but when you do need a wand, please let me know.”

Remus smiled. “I appreciate that. Thank you.”

The song ended, and Peter took up with Marlene while Caradoc gave Dorcas’s feet a reprieve.

“How are you, Smith?” James asked as he approached Lily and Remus, beaming.

“Evans,” she said. “I’m Lily Evans.”

“Evans.” He nodded with mock seriousness. “I like it. Very well – all right, Evans?”

She shrugged.

His smiled vanished. “Sorry. I’m just—I’m really glad everyone’s alive.”

“So am I.”

“No complaints here,” Remus added.

“D’you want,” James said quickly. “I mean, this was such a bad idea, you’re probably still feeling like shit—”

“They needed it,” Lily said. “That’s the most important thing.”

James looked like he might disagree, but he restrained himself. “D’you want to step away for a minute?”

She glanced at the dancers—and they were all radiantly happy, alive and victorious and mostly well—and nodded sharply.

She couldn’t fault them their celebration, but participating….

James led her up to the forecastle deck, right up to the front where the wind tugged at her braid. The harsh air felt nice against her face; cleansing, in a way.

“You’re welcome to—I mean,” James said, “this isn’t _that_ invitation, but if you don’t want to sleep alone…you can sleep in my bed.”

“I’ll wake you up.”

“I know.”

And she felt childish for it, but spending the night alone, down where she couldn’t see the sun or the stars….

“Yes, please.”

“It’s all right to ask for help,” he said gently.

“I know,” Lily said, her throat tight. “Only I’m not…it’s been a while.”

He stepped in closer toward her, and tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “You were so clever getting yourself out of there.”

“It was just my hairpin. You properly trained wizards think it’s all about the wand, you know.”

“That’s why we did the cannons, actually. Dorcas thought of it – and I quote, ‘Let’s just blow them up.’ I’d never have come up with that.”

“Why do you even have cannons? If you’re a refugee ship.”

“They came with the ship when my parents got it, and, I dunno, I thought they were a bit….”

“Dashing? Rugged?”

“Swashbuckling,” he corrected.

A laugh forced its way through her throat, and it was both a pain and a release.

“Your silly pirate obsession,” she said fondly. And then she remembered. “Oh, no, your _hat_!”

“My hat?”

“I had it on in the cave, but it was gone by the time I woke up in the brig.”

James waved a hand. “Oh, that. Marlene nicked it off the floor after—well, it must’ve fallen off you. I’ve still got it.”

“Oh. That’s something, at least.”

“I’d’ve loved to have seen you in it.”

“There’s still time.”

“Two weeks, I suppose.”

Lily regarded him strangely.

“Until we get to Lisbon?” he said. “I mean, unless you’ve got somewhere else in mind you’d like to get dropped off.”

The inkling of a good mood she’d been nurturing vanished, an anchor dropped into the sea.

Her mind had decided the issue somewhere in the past twelve hours, without conscious thought or deliberation. It was simply how things had to be.

“Yes.” She looked up into his eyes. “I’ve got somewhere in mind.”

He wasn’t quite facing her, though, standing as though ready to receive the blow of terrible news.

Of course he would think that. She’d told him as much.

“Brighton will do,” she said. “Or anywhere in England. Preferably wherever the rest of the Order is located.”

He looked back to her, hope darting across his face. “You’re not saying….”

“Of course I am,” she said brusquely. “You Know Who’s caused so much havoc in my life, you think I don’t want the chance to bash his head in with a chair?”

And then his fingers were threading into her hair and he was kissing her.

And she was kissing back, heart hammering from relief—she was alive—and happiness—James was finally kissing her—and fear— _what_ had she been thinking, she couldn’t go back to England. But soon those thoughts dissipated like smoke, and she threw her arms around James, pulling him in closer, because as long as he was there and kissing her, nothing else mattered.

Her choices did not matter.

When they broke apart, still clinging to each other and their foreheads touching, he giggled.

“I hope you bash in his head with a chair,” he said, a bit breathily.

“I would give anything to have that opportunity. Just let me know when Dumbledore’s wrapping up the war and I’ll be right over.”

“You’ll already be there.”

“I suppose I might be,” she said, smiling faintly. She would feel wretched again in a moment, but for now there were more important things to feel than regret. “You might be there, too.”

“I’ll be at sea, I’m sure.”

“Come _with_ me,” she said. “Wherever it is that I’m going – I’m relying on you to sort out those details.”

“I’ve got to take care of my parents’ ship.”

“Dorcas can take care of it, if she can learn to be a little nicer.”

He laughed. “That’s an awfully large charge to ask of her.”

“She can manage.” Lily pressed a kiss to his nose. “You know she can. She’ll love being in charge anyway.”

“My parents—”

“It’s your life. You deserve a little happiness.” She kissed him again, this time chastely on the lips. “Come with me.”

He searched her eyes, and then broke out into a smile. “I’ll ask,” he conceded. “But it’s up to Dumbledore.”

“Let me talk to him. I’m sure I can bring him around.”

James kissed her again and picked her up by her arms to swing her around, her dress flaring around her legs. A laugh bubbled out of her, and she reluctantly let him set her down.

“Fancy a dance?” he asked, grinning like a fool.

“Just one,” she said. “Just with you.”

“As the lady wishes,” he said, and drew her by the hand back down to the dance floor.

She didn’t feel as though nothing awful had happened. The knowledge that she’d done something unforgiveable lurked in the shallows, ready to pop up at a moment’s notice.

There was the worse knowledge that by returning to England, she might have to do it again.

But for now there was music, and dancing, and James.

And the crew, of course. Sirius smiling despite playing an instrument he hated. Remus tapping his foot on the side. Dorcas dancing with Caradoc but subtlety leading from the woman’s position. Marlene smiling, less brightly than she used to. Peter trying his hardest to keep up with her and the tempo.

They were pirates, in their own way. They sailed. They stole. They rebelled against the government and searched for hidden treasure. 

But they weren’t like any kind of pirate Lily had encountered before. They were honest pirates, with noble goals.

Lily wasn’t a true pirate either, when it came down to it. She’d never been able to take on the mantle left by her mother. But their kind of piracy….

She laughed as James whirled her into his arms.

That was the pirate’s life for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another beautiful piece of work in there from Zeina, aka cinnamonskittles on deviantart.
> 
> My friends started an audiobook of this fic here: http://maraudibles.tumblr.com/tagged/tyranny%27s-disease  
> Other fanart: http://fetchalgernon.tumblr.com/tagged/td%20art


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